Angel Wings
by Noacat
Summary: An adaptation of Final Fantasy 8 [WARNING Strong language]DISCONTINUED
1. Inbetween waking and dreaming

The world was swimming and so was Squall, his mind somewhere between waking and dreaming. His conscious self tried desperately to rouse him but wakefulness seemed beyond his grasp, as if he'd been caught on rip tide flushing him further and further from shore.  Nothing but the lapping of the waves, desperately struggling for land, nothing but unending torment, darkness, that was his world...an empty sea of sorrow...From this darkness, a voice called faintly to him….it seemed like an ocean away, from someplace he'd never known, whispering to him like the tide, and he could barely decipher the words…_I'll be waiting_ …_I'll be waiting, so if you look for me_...it trailed off, words garbled by the constant lapping of the waves. _Wha_t..._do you mean_? Squall was at a loss, desperate to understand, he groped for meaning… _Who are you?? What do you want?? I don't..._ _Where are you??  _He mumbled groggily.  The voice, melodious and sweet, answered, _here…_ The darkness was suddenly flooded with light, and it blinded him and he loved it.  A field appeared in front of him, its rolling hills covered in a thick carpet of flowers…He gasped, feeling his dream self opening his mouth in surprise......A sudden breeze rustled through the field,  stirring up a shower of petals and…feathers....which playfully danced in the wind.  Through this curious curtain of feathers and petals, he could make out the form of a girl…a dark haired girl. She called softly to him, her form barely visible through a filmy white curtain …The wind stirred again, and just as the curtain shifted so he could view her, his vision became blurred. Reality flooding the dream, his new found paradise becoming more fuzzy and indistinct as he awoke slowly. Once again, he was kicking against the tide...._No!_....As quickly as it had appeared, it all began to unmake itself. The mystery woman disappearing in a glorious shower of petals and feathers. _Wait! WHO ARE YOU!!??  _ Squall cried…

"I'm your doctor", a voice flatly replied. 

Squall opened his eyes …the field was gone, the girl was gone….it was a dream. He was in the infirmary at Balamb Garden.   Doctor Kadowaki leaned over him, peering down at him with a sardonic look on her face. Squall sat up slowly and even as he did so he regretted it.  His head throbbed, intense pain stabbing him in the forehead so badly small black dots danced in front of his eyes. 

"How are you feeling?", she asked, rustling a bunch of papers on her clipboard.

"My forehead hurts…", Squall answered, as he raised a hand to touch the newly healed scar across his forehead. 

"Do you have any idea why?", she asked with pursed lips. 

He winced… "Training" with Seifer.  He hadn't wanted to go, but Seifer had ordered him to. Seifer Almasy was an upperclassman and a first class jerk, who had it out for Squall. Being an upperclassman meant he could order younger, lower class students around. The frosting on the cake was, Seifer was also the head of the displinary committee, along with his lackies, Fujin and Raijin. Meaning if you screwed up or disobeyed an order that Seifer would oversee your punishment. Seifer considered Squall his ultimate rival. As light has darkness, Seifer had Squall. For his part, Squall thought very little of him. Squall wasn't a man of passion and he rarely lost his temper, but he did think often of beating Seifer's ass and teaching that SOB a lesson he'd never forget.  Apparently, that almost happened today and Squall would've won, if Seifer hadn't played dirty. 

The "training" had been going well for Squall.  He'd pretty much beaten Seifer down and had the technical advantage. Squall had gotten a little cocky and hadn't noticed that Seifer was building up for something. Then, Seifer suddenly hit him with a blinding flash of fire, knocking him to the ground. _Bastard, drawn magic wasn't allowed when training in hand to hand combat._  Disoriented, Squall struggled to get up and find his weapon, which he'd dropped when he fell. Seifer took the opportunity and swiped at him with his gunblade. The blade, sparkling in the morning sun, sliced a jagged scar across Squall's naked forehead.  Blinking through the gouts of blood running from the wound across his face, Squall scrambled to his feet with the quickness of a cat. _It wasn't enough for him to just knock me down…no_..._he had to mark me_..._to humiliate me_..._so that everyone could see who won_.. He quickly dove for his own gunblade and rushed Seifer.  Seifer didn't notice this turn of events or he didn't care, as he was too busy gloating and had left himself open for attack.  Enraged Squall swung his gunblade and gave Seifer his own mark. That was all he remembered, shortly after striking Seifer, he passed out. 

"SQUALL? Are you paying attention?", Dr. Kadowaki said, snapping her fingers in front of his face.

"Yeah…"

"I asked you how you got that wound on your forehead." she stopped as if waiting for an answer, "Don't be afraid to tell me either…I'd like to know what happened please."

"Seifer and I were training…it was an accident. That's all." He said, hating himself for covering Seifer's ass but he had no choice. The Doctor's eyes narrowed, obviously displeased with his answer. 

"Yeah, Listen Squall, Do me a favor and cut the crap. Don't cover for Almasy...he's on thin ice as it is. This is the fifth time he's brought in another student that was _wounded_ during training. He's in Headmaster Cid's office right now. Upperclassmen are NOT to harm or otherwise cause injury to underclassmen during training. Is that clear…you did nothing wrong....Squall, you could've been killed today…head injuries are very serious, especially deep cuts like yours. It took almost a half hour to stop the bleeding. You're very lucky to be alive." she stopped and waited for him to respond. A microsecond of silence followed, she knew better than to wait for this one. Squall had never been one to chat about his problems. Sighing heavily, she continued, " It healed pretty well but there will be a scar. I suppose I should contact your advisor and have her escort you to your room…ummm that'd be…Professor Trepe. I'll call her. Rest some more…"

Doctor Kadowaki left the room and Squall, who was quietly contemplating what she had said. He knew what she said was true… but that bastard would make life hell for him if he told the complete truth_. I'm sure he's up there, blowing it off_...._saying it was just an accident._ And if Seifer didn't get him…Fujin and Raijin would, they were dumb as a bag of hammers but hopelessly devoted to Seifer. Of course, it didn't look like it matter if he covered or not, Seifer must be in real hot water if the Headmaster was intervening. Not that any of that mattered anyway, it was his business, not hers. He lay back to rest a little, his forehead ached with pain. Squall started to close his eyes, but something caught his attention in his peripheral vision. There was someone watching him from the observation booth next to his cubicle. It was a young girl with short brown hair. She was watching him with a wistful smile on her face. A wave of nausea hit Squall suddenly, he closed his eyes to beat it back. When he opened them again, she was gone.  _Weird._

The doors to the infirmary suddenly whooshed open and in walked Quistis Trepe, his advisor and the youngest instructor in the Garden. She was a genius, at fifteen she had become a SeeD and three short years later she became an instructor. 

Quistis strode in, a look of exasperation on her normally placid face. She was a tall woman, with long blonde hair that was always tied up behind her head. She looked down at Squall beneath the glassy surface of her bespectacled blue eyes. Clicking her tongue and with her hands on her slim hips, she shook her head. Why'd she always get the problem students. 

"How did I know it'd be either you or Seifer. Oh wait, I know...because its _ALWAYS_ you or Seifer." 

Squall stared at her uncompromising face, the look she was giving him...it begged answers from him.  Sooner or later it would start, her endless steady stream of nagging. If he remembered his mother, he supposed she'd be much like Quistis. 

"Squall, you're an excellent student....why do you let him rile you?  Seriously, you ARE the top of your class. You don't need to prove anything to that idiot. Do you honestly think he's gonna pass this semester, much less graduate? He's a fool...you aren't. Sincerely, I'm concerned...I'm afraid one of these times...well...one of you might _really _hurt the other or even worse...I don't want it to come to that." She sighed deeply, waiting for answers she knew very well would never come.  He just grunted and got up off the bed slowly, "Fine, Let's go back to class."

As they walked out of the infirmary and onto the lovely outdoor walkway, one of many that littered the campus, she tried desperately to rope him into conversation.

"You know, we're all concerned for you." She said, trying to sound casual, "Dr. Kadowaki told me everything. Would you like to talk about it?"

"No, not really." He said stiffly, staring straight ahead.

"And why exactly is that? And before you answer...you know as your instructor I have the right to order you to answer...I'd rather not though", hoping the tough approach would work. 

"It's none of your...." Squall began.

"....business" Quistis finished.

He stopped and stared at her icily. _I hate it when she finishes my sentences_.

"Whatever..."

"Whatever..." 

She giggled, cupping her hand over her mouth as she did so. Why did she do this to him? Trying not to look annoyed, he started walking again.  Against all that was sane and good in the world, she followed.... and she was staring at him. 

"What?!" he barked, horrified at the school boy squeak in his voice that always seemed to come out when she was around. 

"Nothing, Just getting to know my student a little better...that's all.", still giggling. 

He closed his eyes, and pushed away the urge to blow up and really lay into her...it'd been a rough morning, like he needed Quistis' teasing!  A war of words was the last thing he wanted. The only thing Squall wanted right now was for Quistis, and for that matter everyone else, to leave him alone. Perhaps he had come close to death today. Maybe he was on some suicide mission, where it'd be either him or Seifer left standing. Who's business was it but his own. 

At seventeen, Squall Leonhart was an unusually mature but antisocial young man. He was of average height with a slender, athletic build. His light brown hair hung floppily over a pair of cold, ice blue eyes. He was handsome and a few girls had a crush on him, not that they'd ever tell him. Squall had cultivated a reputation for being indifferent and sometimes downright coldhearted.  Very few people dared to speak with him.  It was just as well, Squall had a philosophy that he'd applied to his entire life. Having others care for you only let them and most of all, yourself, down. People were never meant to be with each other forever. What was the point in carrying on a relationship when they'd just end up leaving anyway.  He built a wall around his heart, barring anyone from getting to know him. In his eyes, this prevented it from getting hurt. He'd had enough people leave him in his short life, it wasn't going to happen again. 

He sat at his desk and stared pensively into space waiting for class to begin. Quistis took up her mantle as teacher and began the day's lecture. Most of the lesson had to do with the SeeD exam that was to take place that very afternoon. The field exam was taken by most students who wished to become SeeDs, the Garden's elite mercenary force,  when they graduated. Students at the Garden ranged from five, the minimum age to enter, to age 20, when most students left.  All children who came to Balamb Garden were given a basic education with the chance to take extra classes suited for a military school. Those who took the extra combat and tactics classes could go on and take the field exam and eventually become a member of SeeD. Squall had finally become eligible and all that stood between him and his goal was the exam. 

Squall shook himself awake, he'd been daydreaming....thinking about that weird dream he had in the infirmary. It seemed so strange, the girl in his dream and the girl he saw in the observation booth...were they the same. He didn't think so...The girl in his dream had much longer hair and it was black, besides the obvious fact that she was a character in a dream. The girl in the infirmary was more than likely real...._it's either that or I'm crazy_....he'd have to ask Quistis about it later. Turning his attention back to class, Prof Trepe was droning on about tactics and basic strategy.  _How many times did the basics have to be reiterated before they figured out we know it already!_...Squall grumbled to himself. Finally she came to the point and began to explain the details of the field exam. 

"Today our field exam will take place in Dollet. The local government has hired our Garden to fight the invading West Galbadian forces. Please refer to your handout from last week if you have any questions about what is to happen at today's exam, you may also stop after class and ask me.  I'd also like to remind all of  you that you should have completed the test at the fire cavern before you leave for the field exam. If you haven't completed this last requirement you will not be eligible for the field exam.  So find yourself an upperclassman or an instructor and complete this test today before fourteen hundred."

Crap, he'd forgotten all about the fire cavern....he was going to do that when Seifer had stopped him. The fire cavern was some sort of local tradition from the nearby town of Balamb that had wormed its way into the Garden. Fight the beast in the cavern, prove your manhood...._blah blah blah_....It was first class bull shit, but it was required. After class ended he stopped and asked Quistis to go with him. 

Of all the people he knew here, Quistis was the closest thing to a friend he had. Yeah, they fought quite often and she sometimes annoyed him, but deep down he valued her. He admired her intelligence even though he detested how clingy and unsure of herself she could be. At only 18 she was a professor and a SeeD, what in the hell did she have to be unsure of? Despite all her triumphs she still let herself fall apart when the slightest problem got in her way. Quistis babbled incessantly the entire way to the fire cavern. Nervously tittering information any first year cadet would know.  Patience wasn't always his strong point but when the mood struck him he could tolerate a lot. They approached the entrance to the cavern and formally saluted the mechanical "faculty" members, a gift from the Garden's anonymous benefactor.  The most annoying thing about this particular test was the stupid time limit, the less time left on the clock, the better the grade. Squall had been practicing quite a bit and choose the shortest time limit. Quistis was a bit shocked, no one dared to pick the shortest limit, it was almost impossible to finish the test in such a small amount of time. She half thought about questioning his decision but decided not to at the last minute.  Hopefully, he knew what he was doing. 

The path to the test itself was straight forward enough. It was warm in the cavern, though that wasn't much of a surprise. The cavern itself was apart of a large chain of hot springs and volcanic hot spots that were sprinkled all over the island.  In the very middle of the cavern was a large crater, which contained the local guardian force, a fire demon named Ifrit. Initially, the crater looked innocent enough, until a huge blast of fire and rocks erupted from it's maw.  A large creature, at least three stories high, burst forth from the wreckage. It was the demon Ifrit in the flesh, fire belching from his nostrils. It had the face of a lion, a wild mane of coarse red hair growing around it's head and neck. In the middle of its mane were a pair of knobby horns, that protruded from it's skull and swept back from it's head gracefully. It glowered at Squall, incensed that such a boy would dare trifle with a beast god like himself.

The demon/beast's voice rumbled with contempt, "**WHO DARES DISTURB MY REST!**"

 "I do."

"**SO BE IT, FOOLISH CREATURE**."

The eyes of the beast flared with an eternal, unquenchable fire. It roared and charged Squall, coming at him like a large, flaming freight train. Squall rolled and ducked out of the way, taking time to summon Shiva, the ice spirit he'd been given his first year. Shiva burst from the ground, encased in a glassy coffin of ice. Breaking her prison she blasted Ifrit with a gust of arctic wind The fire beast fell back, visibly hurt by the attack. Squall followed up with striking while the beast was distracted. Mustering all his strength he blasted Ifrit with his gunblade, knocking it into the rocky wall of the cave.  Stalactites and rubble rained down from the roof of the cave from the impact.  The beast staggered to its feet and roared in rage.

The only time Squall showed visible emotion was during the heat of battle. He was at his best now, grinning devilishly as he prepared for another attack . The beast swiped at him again, however this time he failed to dodge. Taking the brunt of the blow, he was knocked backward several feet.  Controlling the fall, Squall tumbled to the ground, rolling over and over until he stopped and quickly hopped to his feet.  The beast roared and swiped again, Squall countered and hit it with the heavy edge of his gunblade. It recoiled with pain, and slipping on the loose ground beneath its feet, the creature fell.  The mighty demon struggled to get up, staggering to its feet with a blaze of fire, black smoke issuing from it's nostrils.  Dragging his gunblade over the rocky floor of the cavern, sparks flying as he went, Squall slashed upward at the beast.  The blade caught the monster square on it's chin, the force so hard that it fell, crashing to the ground. While it was weak, Squall hit it again and again, blasting it with heavy blows from his gunblade. He beat the demon back until it crumpled to the ground. The beast shuddered and with great pain lifted itself to look at the young man who had bested it. Weakly, the fire spirit supported itself with one large arm.  It was badly wounded, lava-like blood dripping from its sinewy body. Of all the years that Ifrit had traveled the earth, none was like this boy...._this boy has the fire of Ifrit already within him, he is truly worthy of my power_.  The beast paused, and bowed his horned head, a gesture of respect the demon gave almost no one. 

" **I RESPECTFULLY SURRENDER AND GIVE YOU USE OF MY POWER, MORTAL. I AM YOURS.**"  The beast said, with a low rumble. 

Lava surrounded the creature, erupting in a sparkling current of flames and brimstone.  In a flash the beast disappeared, a wave of whitish orange flame consumed Squall's vision. The Ifrit entered him, and he could feel its fire burning from within. The flames subsided, Squall stood there for a moment, breathing in and out in ragged gasps. Quistis stared at Squall with a look of complete surprise. The object of the fire cavern was to finish with as little time as possible. She'd been timing the fight, Squall had one second left on the timer. It was a perfect score...she hadn't even finished this test with a perfect score and she had been the top of her class.  Walking over to Squall, she gazed in wonder....he might be a handful sometimes, but he was her best student. 

"No one ever finished this test as easily as you did....much less ever gotten that beast to agree to be their Guardian Force...", showing him her stop watch. " You got a perfect score, NO ONE has gotten a perfect score in the twenty year history of Balamb Garden...no one. Congratulations, you just made a new school record."

 "Thanks.."

They were both quiet on the way back to the Garden.  Her compliment had caught him off-guard. He wasn't ungrateful, but that kind of admiration made him uneasy. He wasn't some god or even a genius, like she was. Compliments and thank yous were merely little lies people told each other to make themselves feel better. There was little point to them.... those kind of things made emotional attachments. He didn't need it nor want it. He wasn't a leader, he wasn't a genius and he didn't need people depending on him that was for sure. Squall knew she'd probably tell everybody and they'd all make some big deal about it. _I could care less if I made some stupid record_, Squall thought sullenly. _I do what has to be done, that's all. I'm no hero_..._Why can't she understand that?? _Returning to the Garden they both stopped at the front gate. She was still awed by his performance and could hardly wait to report it to the Headmaster. 

"You have a couple hours free before we leave for Dollet. Rest up and change into your uniform. I'll give these results to the headmaster and sign all the paperwork....make sure you're ready and waiting in front the front foyer at thirteen hundred. You're dismissed." She said, saluting quickly and then leaving.

Maybe he had read too much into her reaction at the cavern. He'd rather not think about it anyway. It was her business and he'd rather not pry into her affairs. Squall entered the gates that lead into Balamb Garden slowly, thinking about nothing in particular.  

Squall walked silently through the main entrance of Balamb Garden, nodding briefly to the officer inside the small guard station.  Pushing through the large turnstiles near the station and formally entering the Garden's large foyer.  

The building itself was designed circularly, the elevators being in the middle of the building and the various classrooms and other functionaries spiraling around this central core.  The first floor held the infirmary, cafeteria, and the parking garage on the left,  the library, the practice room, and the parking garage on the right, and finally the large dormitories were directly across from the main entryway. The second floor held all the various classrooms. The older students went to the classrooms in the west wing and the younger students in the east wing. There were also a couple of small gyms and weight rooms. The third floor was restricted and only those with special passes or permission could go up, as this was the Headmaster's quarters and office. 

The cavernous building was imposing, yet ethereally beautiful, filled with ivory walkways, open air gardens, and courtyards. Trees and plant life of all kinds were abundant on the grounds, and tended to with care. Fountains and large decorative pools were place almost anywhere there was room, spreading shimmering light on the blue and white interior.  All in all, Squall was quite happy he got to go here. There were two other Gardens that he could've been sent to, he'd never been to either one, but had seen pictures. They'd been built after Balamb, ugly hulking buildings that lacked the charm and grace of this first Garden. 

Galbadia was the largest Garden, as well as the newest, lots of cadets at Balamb talked of transferring. It had newer equipment and improved facilities that appealed to some students. As well as a burgeoning sports program, which included a championship Sharp Shooting team, as well as a top notch Hockey league. Sports held little interest for Squall and he was also of the opinion that newer wasn't always better. Trabia was the second Garden built, and it had the distinction of being the smallest Garden built. It was a technical school, for engineers and computer nuts who didn't mind that it was built in the middle of the artic. Balamb, of the three, was the best all around school, focusing on producing the future leaders of the world. 

Squall wasn't really thinking about being a leader at that moment, his scar was still hurting and he was tired, wanting nothing more than to get back to his room to rest a little. He walked distractedly in front of the info kiosk in front of the elevators, not paying too much attention to where he was going. In a flash of books and paper, he collided with another student running at breakneck speed. She was short and petite, a fragile looking girl that looked like she didn't belong in a military academy. Squall helped her up, he couldn't help feeling partly responsible; he hadn't been paying anymore attention to his surroundings than her.  

" I am soooooooooooo sorry!" she exclaimed, as she dusted herself off.

"No problem. Are you okay?" he bent down and helped pick up her books.

"YAH!" she smiled, rubbing a small hand on the back of her neck, "It's  my first day here! I'm a transfer from Trabia Garden. Hey, have you been around here a long time?  I'm kinda, sorta lost."

"Need directions?"

She nodded, a look of grateful relief flooding her cherubic face, "This place is waaaaaay bigger than Trabia. I can't make sense of all the numbers for the different rooms and stuff....I'm supposed to report to 110-1F but I'm not sure where that is... It's real confusing!!" 

"It seems that way at first, but you get used to it.  Here, this is the info kiosk, if you ever get lost again, look here."  He pointed to a small blue square on the left of the map, "that's 110-1f, room 110 first floor......and if you look to your right, see that blue sign...that's the sign for the infirmary wing. Pass all the other offices down that way and go straight...it's the last office."

"WOW! Thank you soooooooooo much!!" she said, bowing politely several times, then she turned and waved, "See ya!!"

"Yea...Whatever...", Squall nodded and continued on his way, more than eager to get back to his own room.

—


	2. Final Exam

Finally arriving at the small dorm room he shared with Zell Dincht, Squall breathed a sigh of relief. He was in his own space at last, a safe house where he could be on his own without other people to pry into his business. As he entered, Squall noticed that Zell was gone, another stroke of luck!  Presumably Zell was off at the cafeteria being loud or waiting in line for hot dogs or...whatever it was Zell did on his free time.

He kicked off his boots and prepared for total relaxation. Flopping down on the small bed in his sparse bedroom, he picked up the novel he'd been reading. It was an interesting story that dealt with the goings on near the end of the Sorceress war, which had ended around the time Balamb Garden was finished being built.  One of those types of novels that took fictional characters and positioned them against actual historical figures. The story took a broad license with history, though well constructed from a purely literary point of view. 

He lay on his bed and began to read, letting the quiet effort of it relax his mind. It lulled him into a light sleep, the novel slipping from his hands onto the floor. He might have missed his own final if it hadn't been for his roommate.

            Zell entered their small dorm, waking Squall quickly by banging around and cursing like a drunken sailor on a three-day bender. An elephant in a china shop, Zell wasn't the kind of person you could ignore. Worst of all was the singing..... for whatever reasons Zell was under the impression he was some great vocal talent in the making. What he was...was earsplitting and atonal. Unfortunately for Squall, Zell _was _singing... loudly...._gee, was there any other way??_  During all of this, Squall got ready quickly and silently, all the while listening to Zell's own non-so-private drama. _Hey have you seen my_...._what happened to my_..._I can't find_...._OW! I stepped on that_...._endless and pointless ranting, that would have been solved if he just cleaned his room_, Squall thought to himself, patiently waiting for it to end...Zell continued to rummage around the small dorm, making ass loads of noise as he went.  Trumpeting all the way into his room he changed and popped his head into Squall's room. _Finally_... He supposed he could have a worse roommate than Dincht...at least he was funny in his own unique way.

"Ready?" Zell asked, having a slippery grasp of the obvious. 

            "....hmmm....uniform, gunblade, battle face......Nope, not ready!......Ass...."

             "Ooooo...." Zell replied, making a face and flopping around the apartment like a retard.

             They left the dorms together, hitting each other and making disparaging comments about each other's lineage. Arriving a bit early, they had to wait for their squad designations. Squall paced to pass the time, wishing he'd waited a bit longer. At least then he could've finished up more of his book instead of waiting here like an ass. Ten minutes passed and finally Lieutenant Commander Xu Li Xian, Quistis, and Headmaster Cid Kramer arrived with the assignments. Xu Stepped forward and spoke first, she was direct and to the point.

"We have been contracted by Dollet, a small city in Northern Galbadia. Recently, the West Galbadian military has been irrationally hostile and has begun attacking outlying villages and bases near Dollet, as well as other locations throughout North Galbadia.  Our job in Dollet is to eliminate invading Galbadian forces from the southwest. The real SeeDs will be doing most of the fighting. You cadets will be brought in to hold key positions or as clean up patrols to make sure all invading soldiers are dealt with. You will never engage in a full out and out battle.  There will be six squads consisting of three cadets, of these three, there will be one designated as captain.  A team of senior SeeD members and instructors will be observing all squads. Professor Trepe will announce the teams but first Headmaster Cid would like to address you."

Cid stepped forward, slowly adjusting his glasses, with his hands clasped behind his back.  He was a pudgy, middle-aged man with hair that wasn't quite gray and sparkling deep-sea blue eyes. He breathed in deeply and began, " Twenty years ago I created this school with the hope of giving some young people in need a chance to get an education.  Over the years I've been lucky enough to know all the students that have come through these halls. I've enjoyed watching you all learn and grow into the fine young people I see standing before me.  Today's exam will be hard, and some of you may not pass. However, I hope that you all will be up for the challenges ahead. Be aware that you will be on an actual battle field....think before you act...be responsible and most of all be careful and good luck."

After Cid had finished, Quistis began to announce the team assignments. She had gotten to Squad A and B, Squall hadn't heard his name yet and began to kick the ground with the toe of his boot out of boredom. _I wonder where Seifer is_....he mused, not really caring if he ever got the answer. Zell had also gotten bored and was practicing various hand-to-hand techniques with an invisible partner.  Squall spotted Seifer hiding behind a large potted plant..._he'd come in late, as usual_...Squall thought as he watched Seifer primp and preen like an over-sized rooster.

Quistis loudly rattled off Squad C's team members, jolting Squall from his daydreaming, " SQUAD C,  SEIFER ALMASY, CAPTAIN, SQUALL LEONHART, AND ZELL DINCHT."

_Dammit_...Squall's heart sank with the announcement. What a team to be on....Seifer was an egotistical jerk and goaded Zell, and sometimes even Squall,  into arguments neither couldn't win.  Quistis had done this on purpose, that much Squall could see. Something his companions probably didn't have the foresight to realize. It was a test.....a damned awful test to see if three students with nothing in common, could get along and co-operate in a difficult situation. Teamwork as well as basic battle skills and tactics. Clever but annoying.

After a few moments of initial chaos, the squads assembled in tight rows and marched to the parking garage.  Loaded into cars, they were driven to Balamb City, the small town from which the Garden took its name.  The cars stopped at River City Shipyard, Balamb's one and only port. Students and teachers alike disembarked and packed themselves into the cramped confines of the awaiting battleships. 

Squall flumped into his seat in Squad C's compartment and prepared for a very, very long boat ride over to Dollet. Quistis and Zell came in next, discussing the details of the upcoming battle.  A few minutes later, Seifer arrived "fashionably" late, swaggering into the small compartment like a bad actor in a western movie.  Squall narrowed his eyes and wished for an act of god to smite Seifer where he stood. Seifer stared back at Squall, probably thinking much the same thing as he had been...Squall couldn't be sure, he didn't think monosyllabically and was fortunate enough to have a useable neo cortex. Never the less, he was sure that this would be the longest ride he'd ever have to endure, at least until the ride home. 

Xu popped into their compartment quickly and gave them a second brief before they reached Dollet, "I'd like to talk about what is expected from you at the exam. Conduct is of extreme importance...Follow your orders, stay at your post unless otherwise instructed...the only other time you may leave your designated post is if you witness suspicious activity by the enemy. .  You will be allowed a minimal amount of individual judgment on this issue but not much. You may follow but do not engage...notify your instructor or a senior SeeD if you see anything out of the ordinary.  Lastly, the order to withdraw overrides any other order that has been given. Once it has been given you have a maximum time limit of a half hour to reach the landing site and board the boats or they _will_ leave without you. SO be sure you leave as soon as you get that withdraw order...I  can't stress that enough. Good Luck!!"

After she left, an uncomfortable silence hung over the room.  Squall could feel the unrest and realized that sooner or later something would happen. Trying to put his feelings behind him he turned to Quistis.

"Professor Trepe, did you see a girl in the observation booth at the infirmary when you came to get me?" Squall asked, it had bothered him the entire morning.

Her brow furrowed in thought, she stopped for a moment, "No, at least I don't think so. I wasn't really looking."

"Great!" Seifer snorted, motioning to Zell and Squall, "I've got Zell, the girly little chicken shitting gutter bitch on one hand and Squall _I just got my pubes_ Leonfart on the other."

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST CALL ME!!??" Zell shouted, jumping to his feet, his soft gray eyes flashing.

Seifer looked at Zell like a cat looks at a caged bird, a twisted smile cracking across his face cruelly. Seifer replied, pronouncing each word slowly, "CHIC-KEN-SHITT-ING.......GUT-TER BI-TCH..."

"YOU BASTARD!" Zell screamed and lunged towards Seifer, "TAKE THAT BACK YOU SON OF BITCH!"

Seifer stood up quickly and deflected Zell's blow with little trouble, spitting back, "MAKE ME YOU PANSY!"

Quistis stood up and said in a surprisingly authoritative tone, "ENOUGH! Both of you sit down and cool off. I'd like to remind you that you'll be graded on your conduct. I suggest you both knock it off and act more professional for the sake of your grades. Especially Seifer, you are the captain, it would behoove you to loose the attitude. Act like an officer of the Garden and not a child having a tantrum. "

"Sure thing tuheecher..."

"Hey....I have an idea....Let's _TRY_ acting your own age for once...unless you _really enjoy_ failing.  Wait, how many times _HAVE_ you had to retake this test? I've lost count." She shot back, allowing herself a bit of a self-satisfying grin.

Both boys sat down and were quiet for a time.  Zell quietly stared into space, cursing himself silently for loosing control and letting Seifer rattle him. Seifer sulked like a big baby and glowered at Quistis, who didn't really care what Seifer did...because she knew he'd fail anyway.

Squall had watched the entire event with a cold, dispassionate eye.  A quiet kind of serenity had washed over him. There was nothing that Seifer could do to break his composure now. He'd already realized the stakes involved in this test. His whole career with the Garden hinged on this exam and he was determined to pass no matter what. As if to test this commitment, Seifer turned his attention to Squall.  Apparently the events that had just transpired had little effect on Seifer, who was a notoriously slow learner..._that is if he learned anything at all_...Squall thought_._

"Well, acting as your _CAPTAIN_...I order Squall to go above and see how much longer we have till we get to Dollet.." Seifer said, and then waited to see what Squall would do.

The entire room froze, waiting to see what would happen. Would Squall loose it and go off on Seifer...Would he ignore him...Refuse to follow his orders???  Turning his icy glare on Seifer, he simply stood up and answered, "Yes sir."  With that, Squall left the befuddled room to contemplate his actions on their own. He'd had enough of the entire affair and left the room happily. Standing on the deck of the battleship, Squall took in the fresh sea air.  The wind whipped his hair back and forth; little beads of water slapped his face delicately. He closed his eyes and took in all the sensations of the moment. Letting them surround and penetrate his being...this small moment of time to himself did Squall a world of good.  He thought about the strange girl of his dream again...and the girl he thought he saw in the infirmary......Who were they?? The whole subject perplexed him. It was like some crappy romance novel...two mystery women and one man...._hachaaa_... He shook his head, realizing how inappropriate the thought was. He was about to go into battle and he was thinking about girls.

On his way back to the hell that was his squad, Squall stopped in at the helm and asked the navigator for an ETA on Dollet. Walking back into the still stunned and silent room, he gave Seifer his report. They'd be there in twenty minutes, _big friggin' whoop_...  The moment Squall had reentered, Zell had eyed him with something that could have been suspicion.

Although they'd been roommates for almost four years, Zell and Squall knew very little about each other. Zell was a lively and popular student. He had a large group of friends and was very involved in the Garden's various extra-curricular activities. Squall, by contrast, was quiet and kept to himself. He had few people he'd even consider acquaintances much less friends and made a conscious effort to avoid any extra-curricular activity of any kind. Zell was the president or a member of several clubs, including the Martial Arts club, the Drama Club and the Garden festival committee. He spent any extra time playing cards in the cafeteria or going out with friends.  Squall spent all his time reading at the library or practicing in the training center, alone. The two young men had very little in common indeed. 

Zell grew up in Balamb City and when it came time to choose what high school he would go to he decided to enroll at the Garden. Squall was the first person he met and from the start he made it clear that he wanted to be left alone. Zell had entered his dorm room to meet his roommate. 

"Hi, I'm Zell Dincht, your new roommate..."

Squall had been reading a book, as always. He looked up briefly and said slowly in his soft but deep voice, "Congratulations! You know your name....anything else?"

Zell was dumbstruck; he'd never met anyone who was that brusque. He frankly had no idea how to answer Squall's question and began to stammer dumbly.

Squall blinked a couple of times and then added, "No?.....Well then, I guess I'll read some more."

At first, Zell disliked Squall's attitude and had found it hard to share a room with him. He'd always try to trick Squall into talking about himself, with no results. The whole situation drove both young men up the wall. Then one day Seifer was picking on him and Squall stepped in. Seifer and Squall fought, it ended with Seifer on the floor with a black eye, crying like a whipped puppy. Squall had helped Zell up, and he was about to thank him when Squall stopped him. _No thanks needed_ was what he'd said..._punk deserved it, he's always picking on the new students. Someone's gotta look out for you all._ The incident had changed Zell's mind about his reclusive roommate. Squall had terrible interpersonal skills and liked being alone, but he wasn't a bad guy. He stopped trying to pry into Squall's world, respecting his need for privacy. Squall reciprocated in kind, he didn't even say anything when Zell decided to get a tattoo on his face. Hell, everyone had an opinion on that...his Aunt Anna called it a freakish mutilation...his friends thought it was cool...one teacher thought it was shameful and tried to throw him out of class...Dr. Kadowaki clicked her tongue and told him he'd regret it when he was ninety....Squall just grunted, said _Good for you, _and went back to reading his book. They existed happily this way, living in two different worlds. The only thing that united them was their mutual dislike for Seifer.  That's why Zell had been so alarmed by Squall's reaction to the order given by Seifer.  As soon as Squall sat back down, Zell leaned over to ask him a few questions. Squall was known for being evasive when it came to personal matters, but Zell wanted answers.

"What the HELL was that?" he hissed.

Without even looking up Squall answered, "What?"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. Seifer's _order_....acting like an arrogant dickhead and you just say Yes Sir...hello...What the hell!?"

Squall looked up, his cold blue eyes gazing at Zell so intently that it was hard for him to keep eye contact. He replied quietly, "Is he worth it?"

Zell furrowed his brow in confusion, "Worth what?"

"Worth failing the exam?"

Zell scratch the back of his head and sighed. Squall was right; if he failed because he'd _disobeyed his captain_ he could never forgive himself.  Seifer was an idiot but he'd be a bigger idiot letting Seifer goad him into failing.

"I know you're right but it's gonna be damn hard not wanna wack his ass. Hey, maybe we'll get lucky and he'll step on a land mine..." Zell said, a broad goofy grin spreading across his face.

Unable to help themselves, they snickered...trying desperately to keep quiet enough so they didn't attract unwanted attention from Seifer. The announcement bell chimed and Xu's voice blared over the intercom.

"ATTENTION ALL SEED CADETS. WE WILL BE ARRIVING AT DOLLET'S BEACHES IN LESS THAN FIVE MINUTES. PREPARE YOURSELFS TO DEPART AS SOON AS WE LAND.  THAT IS ALL."

Quistis looked up at her students and smiled, "This is it! Good luck!"

Seifer snorted, jabbing his thumb towards Squall and Zell, "Save that for the students who need it."  

The boat shuddered and a sudden jolt rocked the craft as it came to a stop. Squall and all the other candidates began to rush off the boat.

"Head towards the square," Quistis shouted as Squad C's turn came to leave the boat. She smiled like a beatific angel and added, "Good luck...SEIFER."

SeeDs, cadets and instructors swarmed the tiny beaches that lined the outer walls of Dollet. Seifer had run way ahead of Zell and Squall. He'd taken out a fair number of Galbadian soldiers, leaving Zell and Squall whatever might be left. They fought well but were in constant fear of losing track of their leader.

Near the town square the tiny town of Dollet was eerily quiet. The square itself was deserted or so it seemed. The solemn facades of the bullet riddled shops stared at the trio; their windows open, empty sockets. Seifer stood in the middle of this chaos with his slim, black gunblade resting cockily on one shoulder.

"Took you two long enough!" he said, taping his boot impatiently against the cobbled surface of the street. "Scan the perimeter of the square. There has to be at least one squad of Galbadian scum hiding somewhere."

They split up, each taking a section of the square. Scanning the area all Squall could see was overturned cars, burning garbage, and rubble...tons and tons of rubble.  A quick flash of movement from behind an abandoned vehicle caught Squall's eye.  He froze for a moment and then quickly, silently he moved towards the car. Three Galbadian soldiers were hiding out behind the car. The fact that he was outnumbered three to one didn't bother him in the least. Squall withdrew his gunblade slowly and leaped over the car, landing on his feet with little effort. The surprised Galbadian soldiers had little time to react. With the grace of a dancer Squall weaved, bobbed, slashed and cut until all three soldiers were taken out, in only a matter of seconds.

The few scraps that were to be had amounted to a hill of beans.  All three met a few minutes later at the large, empty fountain in the middle of the square. Minutes ticked by and the only thing of note was a stray dog that ran through the square barking like crazy. Squall could hear the high-pitched whistle of missiles and the sound of distant fighting. Boredom began to set in and took its toll on the three young men. Seifer finally couldn't take it anymore. It was maddening, the stillness, the quiet...he needed action...to be doing something ...anything. Zell had amused himself by practicing martial arts, he seemed to do that a lot, but it kept him quiet.  Squall was silent, meditating morosely with his back against the wall of a small potion shop.

"I can't take this anymore!" Seifer said in a low growl.

Just then a contingent of four Galbadian soldiers snuck through towards a small road near the left hand side of the square. They hadn't seen the cadets, who were concealed by the large, ugly fountain in the middle. Squall watched them, confused...if he'd remembered correctly, the road they were on only lead to an abandoned communications tower.

That particular tower hadn't worked in years; it had been abandoned because of faulty design. There had been a big disaster when it was first erected years ago. The power cables on the tower had malfunctioned and lead to several energy leaks throughout the entire structure. The leaks had attracted several Elvorets, bat-like creatures common to the rocky hills and plateaus in North Galbadia. Elvorets liked dark, warm places and the tower had proved to be a perfect place for them to rest. They'd nested in one of the out of the way conduits and support structures that were essential to keep the tower working order. All factors combined and one section of the tower had exploded, killing several workers and damaging a few of the local shops. Lawsuits were filed and the communications tower was left to become another derelict building. Dollet officials ended up erecting another more modern tower, farther away from town, that was up and working for the last five years.

Seifer also spotted the fleeing soldiers and he narrowed his eyes. Those soldiers were suspicious and may prove to be a threat to other cadets and SeeD members. A perfect excuse to leave the all too quiet square. Squall eyed Seifer...he could see the gears in Seifer's head working...he was of a mind to disobey orders, or at the very least bend the spirit of the orders to suit his own will. Seifer started in the direction the Galbadians had gone. He stopped, realizing his charges weren't following. Infuriated, he spun around and glared at Squall and Zell.

"Are you fucking wussin' out! Come on...we gotta follow those guys."

"Our orders were to remain at this square." Zell answered, arms crossed.

"Well, Chicken shit...I'm giving you new orders...You two are coming with me and we are going to check out what those Galbadians are up to....and if you don't you can go home and tell your mommy about how big a pussy you are. Oops...sorry Squall your mommy didn't love you enough to keep you around...I guess you can _try_ and find someone who might care."

Zell's face blazed with anger, his face turning various shades of red. Somehow he kept it reigned in enough to answer.

"Fine, let's go..." he answered through gritted teeth.

Zell looked over at Squall, who was still leaning against the wall, eyes down. He just stood there, all the time knowing that his non-reaction was driving Seifer mad with fury. Seifer strolled over to him, his chest puffed with machismo and his usual air of superiority. He stopped in front of Squall and planted a hand by Squall's head. Leaning over so that he was right in Squall's face, he stared at him with half closed eyes. The threat was obvious. Seifer was much taller and bigger than Squall was...he'd always used this advantage against supposedly "weaker" opponents. Seifer was a brute and a bully... and that is all he'd ever be. Squall was less than impressed and voiced this opinion silently. He ignored Seifer completely, continuing to stand at the wall, quietly meditating.

"Got a problem Squallie?" Seifer said, oozing with contempt..._how I'd love to wipe the floor with your ass_..._passionless bastard. _Squall looked up at him slowly, his face an emotionless mask.

"No Sir"

"Then move out."

Another time, Squall's reaction would have more than tempted Seifer to continue to persecute him, until he finally got under Squall's skin and little girly boy lost his temper.  But, Seifer just wasn't it the mood. He wanted to get the loser moving so he could go and kick some ass. The wuss should be grateful; they'd be heroes if they pulled this off. Besides, he could pound a lesson into him any old time...he was more excited about finally distinguishing himself in battle.  _To become a white knight_....

They made their way down the small side street. Eventually the street ended and turned into a rocky, weed strewn path that obviously hadn't been used in awhile. The path winded around the rocky hills that surround all of Dollet. The Comm. Tower was at the top of one of the tallest hills in the area and the small path was strewn with large weeds and boulders, making the going really slow. The Galbadians had a head start and a sizeable lead on the cadets. The trio arrived at the tower in time to see some of the soldiers dragging equipment into the dark maw of the defunct building. They hid out behind a large outcropping of rocks and watched for several minutes until all the soldiers disappeared into the tower.

"What do you think they're doing up there?" Zell whispered.

Squall shrugged, "It doesn't make much sense. That tower hasn't worked in years, and Dollet has another one that's perfectly operational not twenty miles from here. The new tower is far more advanced.... This one's an older communications tower, uses radio waves...what could they possibly want with it?"

Zell nodded, "Could they fix it...get it up and running again?"

"I suppose but why? No one uses radio waves anymore...newer systems have digital cable receivers installed.....why would they need such outdated equipment?"

Seifer stood up, irritated by the whole exchange, "Who cares! Let's just go and fuck them up."

He jumped off the rocky outcropping and landed at the base of the small hill.  Seifer ran to the entrance and looking back at Squall and Zell, he smiled.

"You two coming?" not really caring either way.

Squall rose to his full height and said slowly, "I think you were right about the suspicious nature of the Galbadian's activity. However, our orders specify that we are to pursue but take no direct action. We all should go back and inform our commanding officers."

"Yeah, Squall's right. This is way over our heads...." Zell piped up.

 "Mutiny...figures...Well you two can wuss out if you want. I'm going in....take all the glory for myself..... later.." just before he entered the tower,  Seifer turned and looked directly at Squall "Maybe someday I'll tell you about my romantic dream."

"Romantic dream?!" Squall repeated, confused by the strange comment.

"Yeah...even a emotionless freak like yourself has to have a dream. Everyone has one and someday I'll tell you mine." he looked down with a wistful smile and entered the communications tower.

"Oh goodie...."

"Well, what now?" Zell asked, cocking his head to one side as he watched Seifer leave.

Squall looked at Zell, bewildered..._who made me the friggin' leader_...he sighed, "You go back and report what's happened to the instructors. I'll stay here and wait for Seifer."

Before either of them could do anything a commotion from the patch of brush and boulders behind them caught their attention. A female cadet had tumbled from the embankment and landed on the rocky path, knees first.

"OOOOOWWWWWWW!!!" she yelped, rubbing her wounded knees through her uniform.

"You okay?" Zell asked, trying not to laugh. "You know...jumping from that ledge wasn't the best of ideas."

"YAH!...but it did save some time. You from C?" she asked, still rubbing her knees.

"Yes" Squall answered, squinting his eyes....the girl seemed familiar.

The girl looked up to see who'd addressed her. She hadn't noticed the other student, who'd been quietly waiting in the background. Staring at Squall, the cadet broke into a wide grin.

"HAAAAAAAAAYYY!! You're that guy who helped me out before!!" she giggled, "Thanks a bunch! Now I don't get lost anymore!!" Stopping suddenly, her brow knitted together in thought.

"OH! I almost forgot!" quickly saluting them, "Selphie Timlett, Squad A Lieutenant Second class."

"Zell Dincht, Lieutenant second class."

"Squall Leonhart, Lieutenant first class." Selphie turned and saluting again, addressed Squall.

"I'm looking for Captain Almasy. I have a priority message for him....hey....where is he??"

"He's gone inside the communications tower over there." Squall answered, pointing to the defunct building behind them.

Selphie's large emerald green eyes widened and she stuck out her lower lip. _How irritating_...she thought as she pouted, "Well, we better go and get him. I may as well tell you, Squall...the order to withdraw has been given...we have to be back to the boats at sixteen hundred."

Squall quickly checked his watch and grimaced_, Crap_...._that's twenty minutes from now_..."Oookay...we have less than a half hour to get to the boats. Let's go in the tower and retrieve Seifer. Move out"

Zell and Squall began to walk down the path that lead to the steps of the defunct tower. Selphie jumped off the outcropping and nearly fell again. Rubbing his temple all Squall could think was..._why me??_ The cadets entered the communications tower together. Inside it was almost black but for the small light on the elevator lift. In the dim light they entered the elevator and ascended to the top of the tower.  From the relative darkness of the bottom of the tower, the bright sunlight on the top of the tower disoriented the cadets. Squall's eyes adjusted and he spotted Seifer. He was standing over a cowering Galbadian soldier, dressed in blue. It looked as if he'd either killed or knocked out all the other soldiers. At the side of the one dressed in blue was another prone soldier, dressed in command red. He looked knocked out but not dead...He'd beaten them all pretty badly and from the way Seifer was lifting his gunblade, he intended much more. Squall wasn't sure what Seifer was trying to accomplish..._it looks like he's trying to interrogate them but_..._god is he awful at it. That's good, he'd  used the beat senseless, ask later method of interrogation. There was no way those soldiers could have answered his questions adequately_....He'd  beaten them with the false intent of interrogation; an excuse to thrash them until they passed out or he killed them. Seifer could blow off any loss of life and call it an accident during interrogation. _Asshole_... _becoming a SeeD meant you wanted to help people out of situations like this, not an excuse to maim and murder_.....He quickly pushed the thought aside, getting back to the boats was all that mattered.

"SIR!" Squall shouted, hoping to momentarily distract Seifer from his "_kill_".

Seifer flinched and whipped round to face him. He glared at Squall with real menace and open contempt. 

"WHAT?!"

"She has a message for you, Captain." Squall answered, pointing at Selphie.

Selphie stepped forward timidly and saluted. "Selphie Timlett, Squad A...um...I have a message for you s-sir. I'm to inform you that the order to withdraw has been made and we're all to assemble ASAP on the beaches at sixteen hundred."

"SHIT!" Seifer exclaimed and looking down on his prey, he kicked the blue soldier in the stomach, "So sorry...I gotta go and we were almost done with our little chat. Too bad." He looked over at Squall and the others, and before pushing his way through them, said "Later losers." He started up the lift and left without them, waiving as the elevator descended downward.

"HAAAAAAAAAYYY!!! WAIT!!" Selphie shouted, running to where the lift had been, "WHAT A JERK!!"

"Figures he'd screw us..." Zell snorted and then added, " You know, it's not the insults that piss me off, it's the arrogance. Well, what now Squall?"

Squall thought for a moment. He was almost loath to answer such a redundant question. However, time didn't permit for such flights of emotion. "We leave."


	3. Graduation

As they exited the communications tower, the trio forgot that they'd left the wounded Galbadian in blue still conscious.  Painfully, he pulled out a small device from his pocket, with an arm that was broken by the cocky blonde SeeD. It didn't matter that the other three had prevented the arrogant captain from killing him. Revenge was all that was on the tired young soldier's mind. The device he held in his hand was an activator for an elite, top secret weapon the Galbadian military recently developed. It was called the X-ATM0, it's only purpose was to pursue and destroy the enemy. Top level Galbadian Generals had hoped to test run the X-ATM0 in Dollet, today they would get their one and only chance. He depressed the small red button on the side of the activation unit and passed out. 

The machine rumbled to life, its heat and motion sensors burned an eerie red,  like two large inhuman eyes. It slowly lifted its bulk and leapt from the top of the tower. The machine came crashing down and with speed surprising for its size, it barreled down the hill towards the unknowing cadets. 

Squall and the others had been jogging down the hill at a pretty good pace. _At this rate we'll reach the beaches in at least fifteen minutes, with a couple to spare_...Squall thought absently.  The ground beneath them rumbled suddenly. It caught all three cadets off guard and they fell to the ground in a heap. Looking around for the source, the trio tried desperately to get to their feet, with little luck.  Every time one of them tried another tremor shook the earth and they'd loose their footing, falling back to the ground. The rhythmic pounding continued, shaking small stones and boulders loose from their perches on the hillside. After a moment and with great difficulty the cadets finally stood up. 

Helping Selphie to her feet, Zell shouted above the melee, "What do you think it is, Squall??"

Struggling to maintain his own balance on the uneven ground, he shook his head and shrugged. The land around here was loose and quite unstable, but no earthquakes had ever been reported in Dollet. It was strange to say the least....Then, from around the corner of the hill, Squall saw the spider like visage of a monstrously large machine. The hulking mass of metal churned and with each step shook the earth. _Dear lord_.....__

Squall's normally neutral face drained of color , "OH SHIT!!"

Zell spun around to see what Squall was looking at and almost shat himself. _What the HELL!! _ He looked over at Selphie, who was frozen in place, her eyes as wide as dinner plates. Zell socked her hard in the arm to break her from the trance brought on by panic. She took out her nunchaku and Zell prepared himself. Having only his fists to rely on, he looked to Squall. He withdrew his gunblade, the mirror-like surface glinted in the late afternoon sun.  Unsure of what would happen next, they braced for an attack. The thing clanked forward with surprising speed, shooting off laser blasts as it went. The cadets dodged the blows easily, looking back as the blasts hit a large shrub that had been behind them; which promptly burst into flame. The thing came up fast, closing in on the cadets in a matter of seconds. It was close enough now to extended a mechanical claw, grabbing Zell by his uniform. The machine then began to drag him towards a mouth-like appendage with whirring blades for teeth. Zell struggled in vain, fear blanketing his face. Thinking quickly, Squall launched himself forward and with one swipe of his gunblade, cut the thing's arm in half. With Zell freed, they looked at each other and instantly decided that running was better than attempting hand to hand with that thing. 

They ran down the hill with an urgency bordering on panic. The scenery of the hills whipped past them. Squall came to the realization that they couldn't keep up this speed for very long. He could hear the metal clank of the machine behind them, with the terrifying knowledge that sooner or later they'd have to face it. His mind began to toy with ways to defeat it. Their weapons were mostly ineffective....maybe his gunblade could do some damage but not enough to stop it. His guardian forces, Shiva and Ifrit, might be able to put a dent in it...and if he was lucky...someone might have a thunder spell or two attached to their weapons.

"HEY ZELL!" he shouted over his shoulder, "Do you have any thunder spells junctioned??"

"NO...WHY??" 

"SHIT! Lightning would be the quickest way to short out that thing's circuits."

Selphie piped up, "My GF is a lightning elemental!!"

Squall's face brightened, the Gods didn't hate him after all... "Then summon it...now!"

The sky suddenly darkened and black clouds began to gather and swirl angrily. Lightning broke through the clouds with a burst of white hot light. With a crackle of electricity the Thunder Bird, Quetzocoatl, appeared. It glowered over the X-ATM0, which was minuscule in comparison with the legendary bird. It flapped its great wings slowly and ushered forth a terrible bolt of lightening. It hit the X-ATM0 with such force that it drove the bulky machine into the ground, leaving a large blackened crater around it. The machine chugged, jerked and then was silent.

Squall and the others just stood there quietly for a moment, staring at the dead machine. Trying to come to some kind of conclusion about what had happened. What the hell was this thing? Obviously it was Galbadian, you didn't have to see their logo, which was etched on it's side, to know that. But why build such a thing?  _What a waste of time_...Squall thought dimly. His plan had worked, he shrugged and walked away.

"WOW! What a piece of junk!" exclaimed Zell.

"Yeah, kinda scary though..." Selphie added as they joined Squall. 

The trio got less than three feet away from the smoking wreckage before it sputtered back to life. Squall began to wonder if he was wrong about the Gods not hating him..

"Oh hell no!" 

 "NO fucking way...we trashed that thing!!" Zell exclaimed, looking over his shoulder

"LIKE IT MATTERS! RUN!" Selphie shouted and took off running.

X-ATM0 hauled itself up and began pursuit again, though this time, its circuits fried, it wasn't as fast or maneuverable. Squall and Zell ran after Selphie in blind panic. Like bats out of hell, the trio scrambled down from the hill and into the square they'd been guarding minutes earlier. The machine followed, toppling one of the larger shops and scaring away the stray dog that had made its home in the square. The cadets ran like hell, not looking back,  they headed for other side of Dollet. Making it to the bridge that connected one part of Dollet with the other, they charged over it without thinking. The machine tried to corner them, leaping in front of them to try and block their way. Thoroughly convinced that fighting it was a waste of time and effort. All three cadets skidded to a stop, quickly turning around to run the other way. The machine followed, leaping back the other way to once again block their path. Selphie quickly summoned her GF again, knocking the machine out long enough for them to cross the bridge and make it to the other side of Dollet. The damnable thing started up and once more began the chase, catching up with them as they ran past a tiny little coffee shop. It came crashing through the intersection, turning the quaint coffee shop into a pile of rubble. Squall ran like hell, his chest heaving in and out, sweat pouring from his brow. Zell and Selphie had pulled a bit ahead of him, not having to lug a large and heavy gunblade around with them. They barreled down the narrow streets of Dollet, gradually nearing the beaches, with the machine never far off their trail. It followed them, destroying anything in its path. They fled through the final street that lead to the beaches. Squall looked back briefly and watched as the hulking menace crushed a car with one of its heavy feet. _Shit_....._that could be me_...he thought.....Squall could see the beach just ahead, it seem so far to his mind...he could feel fatigue sneaking in. Selphie and Zell had really gotten far ahead of Squall, he was lagging badly and began to wonder if he'd make it. They tore through the covered walkway that lead to the beach. Ignoring the stairs entirely, they jumped off the barrier around the beach entrance and landed on the soft sand. Hitting it with a thump, Squall continued to run, his pace slowing with every step..... Zell and Selphie pounded the ground, sending puffs of sand whishing behind them. Selphie was the first to dash onto the deck of the waiting ship. Zell turned to see Squall wasn't with him. He watched in horror as the machine burst through the overhang and ran towards Squall. Showers of rock and rubble littered the mostly deserted beach. It had completely destroyed the overhang....._nothing could stop it_..... The machine paused momentarily to lock on to its target. Spotting Squall, it took off and made a beeline for the young cadet. 

He could hear the metallic scream of the machines gears behind him. With each step he took, he could feel the heavy mechanized legs pounding closer.  Squall could see Zell...he was shouting for him to jump, waiving him on and on...but the boat seemed so far to his tired eyes. The machine came closer, it's gears screeching...In an adrenaline induced panic, Squall made a desperate leap towards the boat, landing hard on the cold floor of the cargo bay. Zell helped him up and ushered him into the belly of the boat, the machine still pursuing. It leaped into the air, to crush the escaping ship and its occupants, in a single minded effort to destroy its foe.  A turret on the top of the boat turned around quickly and opened fire on the air-borne machine. It was Quistis, manning the high powered machine guns mounted on the turret. She mercilessly fired round after round into the X-ATM0. The shots tore through the machine's hide easily, riddling it in a hail of bullets. It shook sickly with each round that was plugged into it, convulsing epileptically in mid air. The constant barrage of bullets took its toll on the machine and it slowly began to disintegrate as it lost more parts than it could replace. Finally, one of the shots hit the machine's fuel line and it erupted explosively into smoking chunks of metal.  The husk of the once powerful machine dropped limply to the sand, its many parts littering the beach.  Squall kicked himself for not being able to watch the thing blow up. In any event, it wouldn't be getting up from this one.....Amidst this chaos, the boats sped back to Balamb.

The ride home was smooth and thankfully quiet. When they got back to C's compartment Seifer was noticeably absent, which was a good thing. Squall managed to sleep a little, resting his tired body. Selphie had followed them back to their quarters and talked quietly with Zell. In a light half sleep, Squall's tired mind wandered back to the dream he'd had that morning. What did it mean? Was it some kind of weird premonition or just the random misfires of his subconscious? The girl...who was she? He didn't know anyone who even remotely looked like her...She had said she would be waiting for him. _Don't count on me lady_...._I won't come_....he thought, and yet he toyed with the idea of finding this girl. There was something about her that had drawn Squall in, like a puzzle without an easy solution. You knew you might never solve it, but the answer was much too tempting to stop fiddling with it. _Probably just stress_, he mused casually, letting the world fall away for the darkness of sleep. All in all, it had been a rough day for all three cadets and the ride home seemed far too long to wait, at least to Zell and Selphie.  The boats sped for home, in record time they were back in the peaceful waters of Balamb. The boats gently glided into Balamb harbor and docked at the River City Shipyard.  For Squall the ride was too short, the nap had done some good but he could use another few minutes. He stretched and exited the boat shaking the remnants of sleep from his limbs. Zell was waiting for him outside, a broad smile gracing his jovial face. 

"Hey, nice jump...I give you a 9.0" he said, slapping his hand on Squall's shoulder. 

Squall nodded, a faint smile on his face, he wasn't in a mood for joking. He was tired and his day wasn't yet over. All the other students had exited the boat, except for Seifer. As Zell and Squall were about to get into one of the waiting cars taking students back to the Garden, Xu appeared with Seifer in tow. She escorted him into another waiting car, separate from the rest of the other students. Xu looked decidedly unhappy and Seifer wasn't looking too peachy either. Squall and Zell looked at one another and shrugged. His ass was grass and neither one of them really gave a damn. Quistis exited the boat, jogging over to Squall and Zell.

"Great job, both of you!....OH! I'm supposed to inform you both that you have free time until eighteen hundred. At a quarter past you're to go to your home rooms and we'll announce who passed . See ya!" 

Both boys nodded and saluted their teacher, and then hopped aboard the next transport to the Garden. They made it back to Balamb with forty five minutes to spare. The exhaustion of the day finally catching up, Zell went into his room and collapsed in a heap. Squall had gotten enough rest on the way home and headed for a much needed shower. He stepped in and turned on the shower head, letting the water pelt him softly. He just stood there for a moment, allowing his mind as well as his body to recover from the day's labors. The water felt good as it cascaded over his flesh, tracing its way down his body and flowing into the drain. Every bone and muscle on him ached, _god I'm tired_..... The day had been full, so much had happened since morning and like some sick joke it wasn't over. He could only hope that the results were in quickly, maybe he could go back to his room and sleep for a week...._yeah, like that'd happen_. The newly healed scar on his forehead still hurt a little, Squall rubbed his wet face to help remedy the pain. Then he quickly washed up, scrubbing away the dirt and the smell of Dollet from his body. Finishing up, he turned off the shower and exited, covering himself with a towel. 

Squall felt a little better, the shower had been good for him, releasing some of the tension and fatigue left over from Dollet. He felt human again, less like a sweaty, smelly beast.  Squall toweled off and slipped into a clean pair of black jeans and a simple white t-shirt. Black was his favorite color. Most of his clothes were black, with the exception of a few shirts and his uniforms. _Black like my soul_, he thought to himself with a snicker. Peering in at the clock by his bed he noticed it was almost time to go. That's the way his life seemed....nothing but go...go...go ....no time to really breathe or relax. He went to get Zell up from his nap, which had always proved to be quite a trial. Zell apparently slept like the dead and it was near impossible to wake him. Squall had decided to be nice, and shook him gently, hoping that  he'd wake up right away. Zell gurgled, ignoring Squall completely he turned over and began to snore. 

"ZELL....WAKE THE HELL UP.." Squall barked impatiently, socking him on the arm. 

"NNmmmfffffff...ya...fuuu..." 

"Dammit....bloody jackass...WAKE UP....WE GOTTA GO..." Squall socked him again, contemplating kicking his ass out of bed if he didn't wake soon. 

"MMmgaaaaaaa..."

Squall blinked twice and then pulled back his arm as far as he could. He let loose and hit Zell full force on his shoulder, "WAKE UP.....ITS TIME TO GO!"

"Nnefffud YAH!  NINJA ROBOTS!" Zell said with a start, he looked blindly around the room for his attacker and whined, "nnnmmm......Why'd you do that?"

"Cus you wouldn't wake up the first fifty times I did it. Now get up...we'll be late."

"Yeah, yeah....." Zell kvetched, "Didn't hafta hit me so hard tho..."

"Don't bitch...I half thought about dumping your ass outta bed...Lets go..." 

Zell and Squall left their dorm and made it up to their class just in time. They entered their crowded and lively homeroom together. Zell was still a bit groggy from his nap and flopped down in his seat tiredly. Squall sat down in his own seat and glanced over at Seifer, who still looked less than pleased. _Bet he got his ass reamed out by the headmaster_...Squall thought. Looking away he noticed the entrance of Seifer's shadows, Fujin and Raijin.  They were Seifer's fan club and the only people who could stand to be in the same room with his bloated ego. _Why were they here anyway?_ The sad truth about Fujin and Raijin was that they'd never qualify for the SeeD exam, much less graduate at all. Perhaps that's why they hung out with Seifer, who also had little hope of leaving the Garden with a diploma. 

Raijin noticed that Squall had been looking at him and strutted over to him. Leaning down he sneered, trying to sound menacing, "Whatcha lookin' at, ya know?"

Squall sighed deeply, he didn't have the patience for dealing with these two. In fact, they were hardly worth his attention at all. He could beat their asses blind folded, though he never even entertained the idea. _Can't prove anything by beating up feebs.  _They both tried so hard to be intimidating, when in the end all they did was grate on the nerves. 

"Not much..." Squall answered acidly. 

"ANGER!" Fujin cried, hitting at the air with her hand.

"Yeah, youse got an attitude, ya know. I should knock that outta you...I heard 'bout what happened at the exam and if Seifer fails 'cus of you...well, you'll be sorry, ya know." , said Raijin with a dumb grin. 

"If he fails it'll be his own fault!" Squall countered, his eyes narrowing. 

"QUIET!" 

"Yeah! Don't say that about Seifer, ya know. He'd..."

"Fujin, Raijin...back off..." it was Seifer, his eyes were closed and his feet propped up on his desk. 

Seifer wasn't quite sure why he decided to stop his friends. Sure, Squall was probably asking for it but he wasn't in the mood. In truth, he was a little impressed by Squall's performance on the exam. The boy managed to come out not looking like a total wuss. That was the thing that had always bugged him about Squall. He was so weak, in mind and body, it irritated Seifer to no end. Squall could be so much more, he saw in the boy a potential to rise above mediocrity....but he short sheeted himself by being a limp dick who followed orders like a good little android. Squall never thought for himself, he always played by the rules and never took a chance. Worst of all, Squall didn't have a lust for life, he didn't dream, didn't believe in anything....typical Garden robot. 

Seifer thought back to their fight on the beach that morning...Yeah, technically Seifer had cheated, he knew it and he knew Squall knew it...That wasn't the point. Seifer did it to get a rise out of Squall, to see the real him....the warrior...the knight he could be. _If only he'd push himself more he'd be the perfect rival. Then he might actually challenge me_...Squall made a gallant effort, he struck Seifer back in revenge, giving him a scar to remember him by. Then he went back to being a wet bitch and passed out. 

It was lucky that Fujin and Raijin had followed along to fish while he fought Squall. With his head bleeding profusely from his new scar, Seifer had carried Squall over his shoulder the entire way back to Balamb Garden. Fujin and Raijin had helped out, carrying both their gunblades. There were times on his way back that Seifer felt like he might pass out, but he didn't. He fought it the entire way and only collapsed once he made it to the infirmary. _You don't quit, you don't give up, you don't stop fighting until the job is done_...._any true hero should have a burning passion inside and a deep devotion to what he believes in his heart is right. Sometimes a true hero doesn't follow the rules all the time_...._he has a mind and a will of his own, standing up for his principles no matter what_.....these were lessons Seifer had tried to teach him. Loser that Squall was, he never learned and he doubted he ever would. _Bitch'll get all the awards and he'll probably graduate and I won't_...._but at least I have values I believe in. _That thought comforted him a little, but it still nagged at him that Squall got all the kudos and he got squat. Seifer opened his eyes, snapping his fingers beckoning Fujin and Raijin away from Squall's desk. Like dogs, they obeyed but before Raijin rejoined Seifer he looked back at Squall.

"Youse got off lucky, ya know"

"Yeah, Whatever..." 

The door to the classroom whisked open and Xu walked in accompanied by Quistis. They headed to the front of the class together and without much ceremony, Xu began to read off the names of those students who passed.

"Aya Akihino, Terra Brandfort, Dane Caroliss, Zell Dincht, Aeris Dunborough, Sou Kishuku, Squall Leonhart, Kaiya Lleowny, Koran Mufuda,  Nida Tarkin, Selphie Timlett, Baird Wallace. Congratulations, class of '93....To those who did not hear their names, better luck next semester. Quistis...."

 "I'd like to extend my congratulations to all the new SeeD members. I'll also take this opportunity to remind you of tonight's party. This is a special dinner and reception for recent graduates and all of you are required to attend. This is a chance for you to socialize with senior SeeD members and prospective clients of the Garden. Be on your best behavior and remember to have fun!...See you all tonight at eight o'clock sharp!", as she made the last remark, she stared at Squall with a sparkle in her eye, "You're all dismissed."

Students filed out of the classroom in groups. Squall waited till everyone had left and then quietly picked up and went himself. He was walking towards the elevators when he stopped. Seifer and the twins geeks blocked the entrance to the hallway that lead to the lifts. All the students who just left had been stopped as well and waited with baited breath. Squall froze, waiting for Seifer to move first. He didn't feel like fighting at the moment but if Seifer pushed him to it, he would. Zell and Selphie had been walking together when they were stopped. He also expected some kind of retribution from Seifer and was on edge...waiting for an attack. Zell stepped in front of Selphie, shielding her from any danger. Selphie shot him a look, annoyed at his show of chivalry, she could take care of herself. The roomed was filled with tension...everyone waiting for the fight to break out. In a totally unexpected move, instead of attacking, Seifer raised his hands and began clapping. The entire room was stunned, including Fujin and Raijin, who slowly joined their boss and began clapping themselves. Seifer smiled amiably enough, for him anyway, and stepped aside to let Squall and the others through. As Squall walked past Seifer, he smiled weakly, still confused by the entire display. 

Zell jogged up and joined Squall, "What the heck was that all about?? WEIRD!"

"Like I care...." 

"Well, at least he's being nice...sort of..." Selphie chimed in, "You guys excited about tonight's party!!??"

"I am...but Squall's not much of a party animal...right Squall?" 

Squall mumbled something and shrugged, a pall of unease had overtaken him and he fell silent. 

"Gee...that's too bad..." Selphie said, a genuine note of sadness in her voice, "mmmm.....Hey....Squall, Zell, I'd like to invite you both to be a member of the Garden Festival Committee. I know Squall probably won't join but the invite's open.  You know...cus you helped me out and all."

"Thanks" Squall answered quietly, his light blue eyes softening a bit...a shadow of sadness falling over his pale face. He began to wonder if he was that predictable. Zell and Selphie barely knew him....and yet they both assumed that they knew enough to not even try very hard to include him. Not that he wanted that, but it still stung a little. 

"The Garden Festival....hey...I thought they cancelled that," Zell asked, pouting a little in confusion, "because the head of the committee transferred to Galbadia Garden."

"Nope!" Selphie chirped cheerfully, "When she left I went to Cid and asked if I could head the committee and he said yes! Wanna join, I need more members!!"

"WULL YEAH! I was in charge of music before Donner left!"

"NO WAY!" Selphie exclaimed, jumping up and down, " If you could plan the music that'd take a load off!! Hey! Let's go get something to eat and we can discuss your ideas...teehee...coming Squall?"

 "No, Thanks"

Selphie was about to say something but Zell put his finger to his lips, cutting her off. She nodded, understanding his non-verbal gesture and they parted ways with their reserved companion. Today, Zell had spent more time with his room mate than he had in the four years they'd shared a room together. He'd always given props to Squall for being a quiet roomie...he was never nosy, judgmental....never ate Zell's food or played music too loud...Hey, he'd heard horror stories about other people's roommates and he considered himself one lucky SOB. Zell never pried into Squalls business because he took Squall's reputation on its word and because Squall never pried into his. Common courtesy really....but Zell had never really thought about how lonely Squall had been. Looking at him leaving...he really saw it for the first time what an isolated individual Squall was. Sure, He sometimes acted like that's what he wanted, but was it really? Zell didn't think Squall was happy with that at all...he began to think about how to reach out a little, without freaking him out.....maybe he'd talk with Professor Trepe...she'd probably be able to help..


	4. Sky Fits Heaven

Squall had a few hours before he had to change, yet again, for the party.  Slumping tiredly onto his bed, he lay down and stared at the ceiling.  Random thoughts buzzed in his brain, he was confused and frankly downright unhappy. Everybody acted like they knew him and they didn't. He might be a loner but it didn't mean he hand no feelings. Irritated, he began to think about the strange dream again. Squall was not what you'd call a ladies man...He was absolutely focused on his career in SeeD and thought little about anything else. His world was regimented...solid....the same thing day in and day out....and he supposed he liked it that way.  A relationship with another person would add chaos to the perfect equilibrium of his solitary world. That's why his mind couldn't wrap around that dream...where did it come from and why...He didn't need anyone else...who was this girl and why was she waiting for him...The only person you can depend on is yourself....why did this apparition beckon him...hell, it expected something of him....something he couldn't give....

So many unanswered questions left him frustrated...it was strange but he could feel himself changing....something was about to happen ... he was on the edge of a cliff and looking down at the bottom so far below, it scared him and yet he waited for it...wanted it...In a way, he was tired of the way his life was going...everything the same...nothing different. He was tired of being alone. Tired of watching life but never having one. Tired of people judging his every action like they knew him at all. The worst part was that he could never admit it...not even to himself....all he could tell himself again and again and again was that the way he had chosen for himself was for the best....if he tried and he failed...remember how it felt before..._how many times have you been disappointed?_ _Leaning on others made you weak_..._helpless_...he'd been that helpless before and he'd never be again. _Never_....and still a small voice cried out...a voice Squall's restless conscious mind neglected....it told him that he was wrong.....that life was worth living and people were worth caring about despite all the pain and hurt that happened in-between. He toyed with these thoughts until sleep finally took him....thankfully there were no dreams. 

About half an hour before the party Zell stopped in, with Selphie in tow. Zell went into his room and began to change. Selphie popped her head into Squall's room where she found him fast asleep. She stared for a moment at his limp form, twisted all funny in his bed. Selphie couldn't help it, she began to giggle, hiccupping giddily like a little kid. She decided in a flash to wake him up herself. Tip-toeing into his room, she tickled his neck until his eyes fluttered. A bit disappointed that he had awakened so easily.

"Mmmm..mm..whaaa...??" was Squall's reply, still in a groggy half-sleep.

 "It's time to get up...teehee....the party's gonna start soon! You hafta change!" she said, giggling mischievously.

Squall rubbed his eyes and willed himself awake, slowly hauling himself out of bed. Stumbling to his small closet, he looked over at Selphie and cocked his eyebrow. She blinked twice and after a moment she finally got the hint.

"OH! Uh.....do you...um...need to..??" Selphie stammered, her cheeks blushing a deep red.

"YAH...."

"SORREEEEE.." Selphie said as she skipped out of his room, closing the door after her.

After she left, he took his dress uniform from its place in the closet. It looked quite similar to his battle fatigues but much more elaborate. The uniform was made from a dark blue velvet, trimmed in gold braid. The shoulders of the dress coat were ornately embroidered with gold and red silk thread in a design that resembled roses in a garden. The pants that went with it were also dark blue and down the side of each leg ran a stripe of gold brocade and red silk.

He put the stuffy uniform on, making sure to wear a light cotton undershirt to avoid chaffing his skin on the uncomfortable fabric. Squall pulled out his dress boots ,and after buffing them to a mirror finish, he put them on. Standing he admired himself in the mirror, it did look quite nice on him. He quickly brushed his light brown hair, glancing back at the mirror as he did so. It was then that he first took a real good look at the scar that ran down his face. He was in such a rush to go before that he hardly noticed it.  The scar ran from the brow of his right eye, across the bridge of his nose and ended just under the orbit of his left eye. Dr. Kadowaki had been right, it was one hell of a scar. A dark vertical gash, marring his once smooth brow....._I guess it could be worse_...he raised a hand to his face and lightly brushed his fingers against the scar.

Sighing deeply Squall closed his closet door and left his room. He stepped out quietly, hoping Zell and Selphie had left....of course they didn't. Squall stood there awkwardly for a moment, surprised and a bit annoyed that they waited for him. He hated these events and wanted to find a nice dark corner to hide in until he could leave. Having Zell and Selphie around precluded his ability to have some time to himself and possibly leave early.

Selphie squeaked as he entered and gushed, "WOW! You look REALLY handsome in that uniform!!"

Squall was taken aback and he mumbled a quick thank you, the best he could muster.

"Hey! What am I? Chopped liver?" Zell complained, and Selphie answered him by socking his arm, "Ow! What's the deal with people hitting me today...geez."

"It's because you deserve it...goomba. But, I guess you look good too."

"Thanks...I think..." Zell said, pulling a goofy looking face that sent Selphie into a howling giggle fit. He paused to stuff his hands in his pockets and exclaimed, half-jokingly,  "C'mon _lady killer_ let's go..."

The three entered the Garden's large ballroom, which was sumptuously decorated in tones of white and gold.  Strings of lights had been hung on the walls of the room, giving it a soft orange glow. Flower garlands, made of gardenias and roses, and gauzy strips of tulle were draped around the pillars that ran the entire length of the ballroom. The doors to the balcony just off the ballroom had been opened and it was letting in a gentle breeze. Quite a few people had already gathered and were milling about, talking with each other. Large, round tables had been set out around the perimeter of the room, ready and set for dinner to be served. A young waitress appeared and escorted the three young SeeDs to a table.

"WOW! It's soooo beautiful!" Selphie exclaimed, clapping her hands lightly, "Boy, this gives me lots of ideas for the Garden Festival!"

"Yeah....I wonder what we're having for dinner?" Zell said, obviously less impressed by the decoration.

Squall just nodded,  he felt restless and pensive. One of his worst habits was over-thinking, being a perfectionist, he'd try to analyze what he did wrong and what he did right. It was a never ending cycle, he'd obsess and over-analyze, until he was so depressed that he could barely function. It took weeks for him to pull out of it. Other people, Quistis in particular, would try to help him out, but in the end they gave up when it became obvious that they weren't helping. He could feel himself spiraling down into this cycle, he began to think about the past. Memories that should never have been remembered dredged from his unconscious. It was the dream...it had made him begin to question the choices he'd made in life. Deep down inside he knew that he'd made a mistake somewhere because he wasn't happy. He should have been happy, this was his moment, he finally graduated. His dream had come true and yet there seemed to be something missing. For the life of him he didn't know what that was. He was stuck on the thought, and it consumed him the entire span of dinner.

They had been seated with a group of three civilians, who'd come to seek a contract with the Garden. The civilians introduced themselves, though Squall didn't care enough to remember their names. One was a skinny guy, with ragged, limp hair, the other was a woman, at least Squall thought that's what it was, and another was an overweight fellow, with a lazy eye. This icky trio was part of some environmental group....he wasn't real interested in which group or what the hell they wanted. Selphie and Zell seemed to be interested enough, at the very least they faked it well. Squall ignored them quietly, waiting for dinner to end so he could slip away to a secluded corner. Someone occasionally glanced in his direction, as if they expected him to somehow add to their conversation. Mostly it was Zell, who had started eyeing him...the fat man-woman had taken a liking to him and he desperately needed help. He was on his own....Zell had started the stupid conversation, the punishment of talking to the walking fat factory was his. They began a mundane and frankly quite boring conversation about the effects of Guardian Forces on memory.

Guardian Forces, like the Ifrit he'd gained today, were magical spirits, that you could petition to help you in battle. There were lots of ways to get them but only one was to continually gain their power. You had to junction them, allowing them to reside inside your mind. Once you junctioned them, they became a part of you....like a limb...even affecting your personality.  Junctioning GFs allowed you to cast magic, as well as summon your Guardian Force  when you needed it. All magic was based on will, if you didn't have the mental strength and a willing spirit, you couldn't control it. All students studied various meditation techniques and mantras designed to teach them how to cast different spells or control GFs better. You could be a very intelligent student, but be incapable of controlling the complex forces of magic if your will wasn't strong. The mind is a curious thing and sometimes in the course of training with GFs some memory loss was experienced by weaker willed students.  A big deal had been made of those few cases and a theory, by a few crack-pots,  was stated that Guardian Forces took up more than just residence in your brain, their presence slowly replaced all of your memories.  A flaky theory, that had very little research data to back it up and frankly it was a subject that concerned Squall very little. He didn't know or care why GFs worked the way they did, as long as they came when they were summoned.  Who gives a damn about the rest. Besides, some memories weren't worth remembering.... He stared into space...

 He wished sometimes that he was more like Zell...who could just shrug off bad experiences he'd had. Chalk them up to lesson learned and never be plagued by them again. Squall had always had a hard time forgetting. Squall was an orphan....he'd lost his parents when he was very, very young and had no memories of them at all. He'd grown up in an orphanage on the Centra, which had been put out of business as a result of the collapse of its government. Most of the kids who weren't adopted had been sent to foster homes, until they got adopted or placed at a new home.

Just before the orphanage closed for good, one of the other kids had left....it was strange...he hadn't thought of her in ages and couldn't remember her real name....only that they, meaning all the kids at the orphanage, called her Sis.  She was the oldest there and a mother of sorts to all of them....she had been especially fond of Squall and he of her...he used to pretend she was his real sister...Sis was the closest thing he had to family at the time....Squall was a painfully shy kid, he had a stutter and all the other kids teased him...except Sis. She'd always chase all the other kids off and tell them to leave him alone. Sis liked him no matter what, as she liked almost all the kids at the orphanage. Sis made everyone feel comfortable and loved. He never noticed it at the time, but he didn't stutter when he talked with her. One day he woke up...Sis had promised to meet him that day in the garden near the orphanage but she didn't come. When he went and asked the Matron of the orphanage where Sis was...she told him that she was gone....his world collapsed on that day...it started a pattern where he'd constantly run away from the orphanage...he began to act out...to fight with other kids when they got in his face....it was then he started to cut off emotions one by one...Then the orphanage closed and he was shuttled to one, out of many, foster homes....

His first home had been a good one....a young couple with several kids of their own, plus a couple other foster kids...the mother was a lively lady... she was very kind and had tried very hard to bring Squall out of his shell. She was the one who helped him overcome his stutter...She taught him little tricks to stop him before he stuttered..._slow down_ she'd always tell him, _try and pronounce each syllable individually and DON'T let your mouth get ahead of your brain!_  Funny how much she reminded him of Sis, perhaps that's why he let her help him. He lived there one year when the Galbadian government decided to move him else where. One of the last normal times he could remember.

He went to several other homes, if you could call them that...most of them could care less about a lonely orphan like Squall and were only doing it for the money the government gave them for upkeep. They never really treated him badly, but they didn't really make an effort like his first family had. He got used to the loneliness and even came to count on it. In three years he had ten different families. Six months here, two months there....always moving....The worst part was getting to know a family and them getting to know you only to be torn apart a few months later. Every time it happened, Squall's heart would break. There was no lasting relationships...no one to count on...Like any young child, he hungered for the constant love and stability of a single set of parents and one place to call home. Unfortunately, this was not to be....he had no home and no family to care for him....He realized when he was eight that he'd never have just one family that loved him...he'd always be alone. From that day forward he didn't even try to care about the various families he stayed with. He kept to himself and waited for the inevitable move to the next home.  The last home he was in had been abusive, he didn't live with them for long, only one horrible month....the "parents" used Squall's child-support checks given to them to buy expensive things for themselves....the father was a drunk and would often get liquored up and beat the crap out of Squall or his wife or both... Often he came in to the small elementary near his home with bruises, cuts... _whatever_...A concerned teacher reported them to the authorities and finally child protective services found out about their little scam and busted them...he was ten at the time...It was the first time he'd heard about the Garden...

The Matron from the orphanage had married a young enterprising man named Cid, who had started this academy....it offered an education for local children, as well as a place where orphans like him could have a home and an education.  She had heard about what had happened to Squall after he left her orphanage and had asked her husband to take him in. Cid had come in to the half way house they'd put Squall in while his foster parents were on trial. He had petitioned the government to release custody of Squall and let him take the young boy to the military academy he had started in Balamb. At first, the social workers were a bit wary about sending him to a military school, afraid it might be too strict but also hopeful it'd give the boy some direction, so they decided to let Squall have the final say. They let him meet with Cid and if he wanted to, he could go with him back to the Garden. The minute Squall walked in Cid started his pitch. He was skinnier then, his hair still a deep auburn, with no trace of the gray that now peppered it. Squall had been seated at a small table in the community room. Cid sat down in a chair directly opposite him. Looking rather silly sitting in the chair, which was too small for his frame, his blues eyes sparkled.

"Hello....You're Squall right? I'm Cid Kramer....how do you do?" Cid asked, smiling genially and watching Squall for a reaction. He was told about the boy's stand-offish nature. Cid could see it'd take something dramatic to impress the boy enough to open up. He started up again,  " I've come to ask you a few questions.  How would you like to stop wandering from home to home? You see, I'm from a place called Balamb Garden...It's a school....I know it seems far away but we'd really like to have you. They tell me that you're very intelligent. I understand that most of the studies at your grade level are way below your potential. I'd like to offer you the opportunity to come to my school....You see, we're a new kind of school. At Balamb the students control what they'd like to learn about. Plus, you get the chance to become a member of SeeD...do you know what that is?" Squall shook his head no, "Well, SeeDs are the Garden's elite troops and they work to protect people all around the world. People like you....Can I show you something?"

Squall nodded, why would this funny looking man give him anything, he just wanted him to go away. Probably another liar that'd promise stuff that he couldn't give...The funny man gave him a small blue marble that was cold to the touch. Squall looked at him with confusion..._what  the heck was it_?

"You know what that is? That little bead contains a Guardian Force...Guardian Forces are special spirits that SeeDs use to help protect them. This one's name is Shiva, she's an ice spirit....would you like to have her?" Cid asked, watching the boy intently. Cid could see interest growing in his eyes....

 "How does it work?"

Cid cupped his large hands over Squall's small hands, "You concentrate very hard, now...your will has to be very strong and you have to want the spirit to come out very much. At the Garden we can teach you how to become strong enough to control these spirits. Right now, I'll have to help you but later on you can learn how to do it all by yourself. I know it sounds kinda silly.... but let's try together."

They closed their eyes and concentrated together. Squall wasn't sure whether to believe him or not but he tried very hard. He focused and with all of his being he willed the ice spirit to show herself. He'd like to see this spirit, if there was one. The room got very cold all of a sudden and when he opened his eyes there she stood. Shiva was there in the room with both of them. Floating in mid-air she was truly a sight to behold, her skin an unearthly pale blue...her eyes were dark and ice cold, they seemed to look right through him....Squall was awestruck...he'd never seen anything like her.

"Why have you summoned me?" the goddess asked, her blue lips mouthing the words with imperious contempt.

"I've summoned you here to show you this boy...I'd like to know if he worthy enough to serve you..." Cid answered politely.

Shiva floated over to Squall and knelt down, touching her hand to his heart. Squall shivered....the touch of her hands was like ice...so cold....almost painful.  He'd never been so afraid and yet so excited in his life. When grown ups went on and on about spirits and fairies, they were usually lying. They only told kids that to keep them quiet but this guy wasn't lying. He had told him there was an ice spirit in a blue marble and there was. Shiva looked into the boy's eyes and began to speak. He was at first confused because when she spoke her lips didn't move. After a few moments he realized that she wasn't speaking at all but projecting her thoughts into his mind....he was kind of afraid to answer her questions...but he summoned all his courage and tried to answer her as well as he could. The rest of the world faded and all that he could hear was the sound of her voice and his......_Boy...why do you want Shiva to help you....why have you summoned me_..._I summoned you because_..._I wanted to see you_...._to see if you were real.__ Well...now that you see that I am real what do you want?_......_Will you really help me? Can you make me stronger?__If that is what you desire. However, strength is not something you gain...it is something you have already...I see your heart is strong...but your body is still weak... You must be willing to work hard to attain your dreams........What do you dream about boy and be honest.....__ I dream about becoming strong_...._strong enough to protect others_... _from those who want to hurt them_..._like the SeeDs the funny man keeps talking about_...._Ah, I see...a noble enough goal. If I help you and you become strong enough...then what will you do? I have seen inside your soul and I know your life has been hard....will you seek revenge or will you seek change? __ I seek change_........._to make myself better so that maybe someday I can  find Sis, so we can be  a family again_...._Your words ring true....Then I will be your Guardian Force, Squall...my power is your power.... _ 

She leaned down and kissed his forehead, disappearing in a flash of light. The blue bead began to glow, melting into Squall's hand like an ice cube on a summer day. Icy fingers began prickling at the base of Squall's head. The sensation was painful, a dead numbing cold subsuming his entire body. He lost all feeling in his limbs, his lips turning a sickly blue as he shivered in his seat. Another burst of light erupted, blinding Squall, and when he opened his eyes he was in the halfway house again. Cid sat next to him, peering at him under his glasses with a funny little smile on his face.

"What did she say?" he asked.

"She said that she would be my Guardian Force..."

"Well, Shiva has answered and now you have to...Will you come to the Garden with me or stay here?"

"Can I really become a SeeD?" Squall asked, staring at Cid with those eyes, even at such a young age they burned with a tireless intensity.

"Yes, you can study and become whatever you want at the Garden. It's your choice."

"I'd like to go with you...I wanna be a SeeD."

That day his life changed, he didn't feel weak anymore. He had control of his own life now. He would never be at the mercy of others again. He dove head first into his studies, eating up any information he was given....He'd always been a smart kid...he learned to read at an early age, thanks to Sis who had taught him how to when he was only four.  It was his only escape from a world that could care less about a lonely little kid like him.  By this time he'd firmly built a wall around his heart and come to the conclusion that most people weren't worth the effort...not that he wasn't grateful to those few who'd been kind to him, he owed so much to Cid...who had taken him out of a living hell and brought him to heaven. Cid was to this day one of the few people Squall really cared about but years worth of abuse and being torn from situations were he'd felt safe and loved had taught him that nothing lasted....nothing lasted and you only got hurt when you expected and depended too much on the kindness of others. He kept most people, to some extent even Cid, at arms length. He didn't want to get to know them and he didn't want them to get to know him. It was easier this way..... His heart was tired of being hurt.....it ached to much already....burying himself in a mountain of books...forsaking the company of the other students on campus for the joy of learning...he decided when he was ten years old that he'd become a SeeD.....that was Squall's one and only dream....to become a SeeD so that he could protect instead of being protected.....secretly hiding the hope that someday he'd find his Sis and be whole again.

Zell shook his shoulder and Squall snapped back to reality. Dinner had ended and the wait staff began to clear the floor for dancing.

"Squall....you okay?" Zell asked, concerned by the strange haunted expression his friend wore.

"Yeah.. It's nothing...."

"Wanna talk about it?" Zell pushed on, worried more and more by the distant look in Squall's eyes.

"No... really...I'm fine... Just thinking about the past."

"Hmmmm....Okay...but if you need to talk or whatever...I'm here and stuff. Gonna dance? Lots o' pretty lassies here...."

"No....I'll be someplace quiet, Zell...catch ya later.." Squall replied dimly, getting up quickly to leave. Zell watched Squall fade into the mass of people on the dance floor, a look of worry marring his normally jovial face.

Squall weaved through the growing crowd on the dance floor to seek out a dark hiding place to hide. He found a spot near the entrance to the terrace, it afforded a great view of the entire ballroom. People watching had always calmed him. There was peace in watching the routines of others. It took your mind off your own problems for awhile. When he was younger he used to make up stories while watching people go through their day...sometimes he still did. People came and went, talking in hushed tones, while wait staff bustled about their business. He watched a couple in the corner whisper in each others ear silent words of love and adulation...another group of SeeDs laughing together over some joke....all around him, people were having a good time.....suddenly, people watching gave him little pleasure, he was restless and though he'd never admit it, he was terribly lonely. The memory of his own painful past made his heart ache with desire. He saw how happy other people were and he knew he'd never be like them. Happy and content...always knowing that someone was there to love them. He tried to tell himself that it was better his way but for some reason that excuse seemed to be of little comfort to him. The orchestra began to play and couples slowly trickled onto the dance floor. Squall watched with an air of cool detachment, silently wishing to join.  

He had very little experience in the ways of women. He'd never dated...never showed any real interest in doing do so. Squall fled in fear from emotional and intellectual attachments. Falling in love left you open to be hurt and he'd rather not deal with that. Besides, most of the women he knew were flighty and annoying. Squall had never found a girl that had challenged him, much less interested him. 

Suddenly, the crowd around the dance floor parted. Squall watched transfixed, a girl he'd never seen before emerged from the opening on the dance floor. The other girls in the room were typical fair. They had too much make-up, too much hair and wore fussy, elaborate dresses that made them look like fat, bloated peacocks. This girl was strikingly different, she had no make-up on and her hair hung loose around her soft, yet surprisingly well muscled shoulders.  The girl weaved in and out of the crowd and Squall followed her movement every step of the way. She seemed to be looking for someone.  _I wonder who?_ Squall mulled, watching her like a hawk....Her movements were confident and self-assured, like she didn't even care that the entire room was staring at her. She was pale, skin the color of alabaster, set off nicely by her shoulder length hair, as dark as midnight with flecks of brown highlighting her heart shaped face. She was wearing a very simple strapless ivory dress, made of a light silk that shimmered when she walked.

Glinting like a diamond in the soft light of the ballroom, she stopped suddenly to look around, her eyes scanning the room and without warning, locking on to his.  Squall's heart skipped a beat, he suddenly felt very nervous and he couldn't figure out why. Caught in a spell they gazed at each other for what seemed an eternity. The girl smiled, his pulse quickened....it was like a blind man who just gained the gift of sight and opening the curtains for the first time, he saw the world anew, bright and colorful. He felt confused, frightened and strangely enough, excited. He wanted to shrink away from that gaze but curiosity  rooted him to the spot. She looked up at the sky-light above the ballroom and pointed to the stars. He looked to where she had pointed, the sky was dark and the stars were glittering. Amongst the steady burning lights of the heavens, a rain of shooting stars streaked across the sky, spreading their magic. The girl looked back at Squall and smiled again.  His stomach started to churn and he was overtaken by a sudden wash of giddiness. With a determined gait she strode over to him, the same beautiful smile gracing her face.

"Hi..." She said, stopping right in front of Squall...her voice like the sound of chimes in the wind, breathy and sweet.

His heart hammering, panic filled every cell of his being. He quickly looked down, hoping that if he pretended she wasn't there she'd go away. Instead of leaving, she began to laugh, her rose colored lips parting in a care-free and effortless smile.

"Ooooo...the shy and silent type, huh?" She said, leaning down to look at his face, which was turning several shades of scarlet,  "Let's see...You're the best looking guy in the ENTIRE room and yet....here you are...hiding in a corner... You're not dancing...not having fun......Dance with me, What do you say?"

Squall didn't answer, he just stared at her and repeated in his head... _pleasegopleasegopleasegopleasego_....she didn't. Her brows furrowed, she wrinkled her nose and stuck out her lip in mock sulkiness.

"THAT DOES IT! You're dancing with me whether you like it or not.!"

She grabbed his wrist and with surprising strength, began to drag him onto the dance floor.

"W- wait! I can't dance!!" Squall protested, his paralysis broken.

She whirled around and with a twinkle in her eyes answered, "So what? Then I'll teach you..."

_God, nothing is going to stop this girl_...__

They stepped onto the dance floor and she turned to face him. Without a word she placed his hands in the appropriate spots and began to guide his steps to match hers. He was hopelessly clumsy, staggering around like a drunk. He tripped and bumped into another couple. It was Baird Wallace and his date, who was almost the ugliest girl he'd ever seen. Baird had a notorious temper and puffed up his chest at Squall's indiscretion. _Probably thinks I'm after his date_....._Ick, not even if he PAID me_....

Wallace broke away from his date and jabbing his finger at Squall began to shout, "What's the big idea!? Watch where you're going!"

Squall was about to apologize but the girl intervened before he could. "Who died and made you king of the dance floor. Why don't you watch where you're going, jerk! " She snapped back in authoritative tone, her dark eyes flickering with anger.

Baird backed off, glowering at Squall, and rejoined his date on the dance floor. Once his back was turned, the girl stuck her tongue out and looking back at Squall, she giggled "Someone should put a bag over his date's head...." she paused, feeling the muscles tighten up underneath his uniform...she looked at his face, and read his anxiety...smiling sympathetically, "hey...It's okay......If he comes back I'll kick his ass... relax a little...You're so tense!"

Squall had enough, his frustration level was at max and he couldn't take it anymore. He didn't even want to be out here in the first place. Now everyone was looking at him making an ass of himself. Why had he let her drag him out here in the first place!? Yes, she was beautiful....Yes, she was more confident that any girl he'd met before but that didn't mean he had to go stupid over her. He didn't ask for this crap and he sure as hell wasn't going to take it anymore. Angry and frustrated, Squall broke away and started to storm off the dance floor. She followed him and gently caught his wrist in her firm but soft grip. He whirled on her, his face flushed with anger, ready to let her have it...to really tell her off...but when he did, somehow it all dissipated. She stood there, just looking at him, her lovely face a sea of serene beauty. Her dark brown eyes were warm and swirled with concern, not judging him...not asking him to be different than he was...just accepting him for who he was....she'd be there if he danced with her or not, she didn't care.... She found him as interesting as he found her...His emotions were in turmoil, unable to reconcile his philosophy with his feelings. She had penetrated the wall he'd built around his heart, and now that she was inside he couldn't get rid of her.

"Want to try again?" She asked with a gentle smile.

He looked up, his ice blue eyes melting as he matched her gaze, "Yes...."

They entered the dance floor for a second time. She curled her small hand into his, squeezing gently.  Slipping her other hand around his neck, her fingers brushing his skin lightly, he shivered with pleasure at the touch.  She guided his left hand around and placed it on the small of her back. Squall could smell the scent of her perfume....she was so close....he could feel her body as it lightly pressed against his.  She turned her face up and their eyes locked, the connection undeniable. They began to dance, putting the clumsiness of their last attempt behind them.  Sweeping across the floor as one, not two...time slowed and they were caught in the moment. Every step missed the last time, Squall hit with perfect precision, his catlike grace normally used for fighting, finding another outlet.....she smiled and giggled like a little girl as he spun her around the floor. All eyes had turned to them, not that either noticed or cared. They were the best dancers on the floor, blowing everyone else away. She looked up at him, smiling warmly. The corner of his lip turned up in a shy half smile, letting himself enjoy the moment. They danced this way for the entire night, song after song....until the orchestra finally stopped and the fireworks that marked the end of the party fired. Looking up at the flowering explosions, they both knew their time was up. The clock had struck midnight, their time together was over.

"HEY!  Time to go, Your Highness!" a voice from the crowd yelped and a young man in a bad tux appeared.

The girl looked into Squall's eyes, he knew what was coming...what always came. Why'd he even let himself hope for a moment that he could achieve any kind of happiness with another person. Fate, it seemed had chosen to bring them together, only to tear them apart. _Typical_

"I gotta go.." she stammered....her voice almost a whisper, "You're a SeeD now right?"

"Yes.."

"Well, maybe we'll meet again. My group might be a future client..."

"Yeah, Maybe.."

"Good Bye..." she said, withdrawing, and as she walked away from him, she glanced backwards, giving him a little wave before she disappeared into the crowd.

He watched her go, his heart pained by the bitter-sweetness of the moment. A terrible sense of loneliness enveloped him. He didn't want to feel this way, his stomach hurt, and he felt like he was going to be sick. Racked with doubt and insecure about his entire world view, Squall wished he could forget everything. This girl, an enigma herself, had fully awakened him to his own despair. As if that wasn't enough, he didn't even know her name. He left the party irritable and confused. He needed time to order his thoughts and a good night's sleep.


	5. Shadows in Starlight

Squall made it back to his room, looking forward to sleeping off the night's depression. He arrived to find Zell still up and packing his things into boxes. _What the hell is he doing_... _it's almost midnight and he's packing_?? Zell glanced up and saw him standing in the door, he nodded and smiled at Squall. 

"Guess What!?" Zell said, in a cheery tone that hardly befitted the hour of the night.

"What" not caring a bit to here what Zell had to say. 

"Since we're SeeDs now....we get our own rooms...." He said, with a lop-sided grin, "Everybody's moving out tomorrow.....I can't sleep so I'm getting my stuff ready now!"

"Hmmmm....Well enjoy yourself." Squall said, waiving as he headed into his room. 

Sure enough, someone had left a flyer on his desk notifying him of the room change. They were also kind enough to leave the key to his new room. Squall stopped and scanned it quickly. He pursed his lips, at the moment he could care less about a new room, all he wanted was sweet, blessed sleep. About to collapse on his bed, Zell's voice beckoned him back to the living room. He turned around with a heavy sigh and staggered back in. 

"mmffhpp, Thworry...." Zell said, with a mouthful of strapping tape. He'd been biting it off, instead of using a scissors like a normal person. Spitting out the tape he began anew, "Almost forgot to tell you, Professor Trepe wanted to see you."

"Reeeallly" Squall muttered, feeling a massive headache coming on, "What'd she want?"

"Dunno...she wants to meet you on the atrium's west balcony. That's all....hey....by the way, Saw you on the dance floor.....who knew you could dance like that! Who WAS that girl you were dancing with, God she was hot!"

"I don't know who she was...." Squall answered distractedly.

"Wow, a mystery girl...cool.... Dude, you are a serious chick magnet!" Zell exclaimed, pulling a face.

"Yah, Whatever...." 

"Good luck... You gotta give me your secret sometime."

"No secret...it's my sparkling personality...Later."

"Thee Ouuooo..." he said, with another mouthful of strapping tape, stopping to waive briefly as Squall left the room.

God, he didn't want to go and meet with Quistis. The west balcony was well known as a make out spot by the entire student body. Hell, even Squall knew of its reputation and he had no experience with such things. The last thing he needed was another awkward pass at him from Quistis. She'd long had a crush on him and flirted with him shamelessly. It's not that he disliked her or anything....She was very beautiful... Hell, she had an entire fan club of young boys with crushes on her, called themselves the Trepies. It's just.....he wasn't interested....She was always trolling for compliments and pity...Squall didn't have the patience for it. She had no self-esteem, no confidence in her own abilities and frankly Squall didn't feel like playing therapist.  He was a doer...if you had something that needed to be done, he'd get it done...it was never that simple with her. Usually, he could control his emotions pretty well, but the whole dance thing had unnerved him.  A confrontation with Quistis seemed inevitable. He couldn't figure his own life out, why'd she expect him to figure out hers? _Yee ha_...._I get all the fun!!_ Squall thought grimly. 

Entering the west balcony, Squall picked his way through the groups of randy teens making out in practically every corner. Quistis had found a quiet spot near a large oak tree. She did look quite beautiful in the moon's pale light, beautiful and yet so sad. How could he tell her that he wasn't the one for her? He couldn't be what she wanted him to be.... rubbing his throbbing temples he walked over to her.

"Hey.." she said, her voice low and soft.

The corners of his lips twitched into something that could almost resemble a smile. He clasped his hands behind his back and said, "Professor, I was told you needed to speak with me."

"So formal..." with a tone of mournful sorrow, she replied faintly, "Yes, I wanted to tell you something."

Squall was irritated by the whole this whole deal. He didn't need this right now....he had his own problems at the moment and he didn't appreciate the extra baggage she was handing him. Ignoring the gales of pounding pain in his head, he could feel his patience running out.

"What can I help you with Professor?" he said tersely, clenching and unclenching his fists. 

Quistis bowed her head, "First of all, you can stop calling me professor.... My review came.... As of today, I'm no longer an instructor at the Garden. I'm a regular SeeD, like you. They said that I was unfit to be a teacher...that I didn't enforce the necessary amount of discipline with my students. They felt that I was still young and needed additional experience before I became a professor full-time. So.... they demoted me."

"I'm very sorry to hear that...is there anything else?"

Her blue-green eyes narrowed.....what was his problem anyway?! Here she was...hurt and unhappy...looking for a shred of sympathy...maybe a little kindness from someone she considered a friend and he was acting like a total jackass. 

Squall and Quistis went way back.... she was the first person he met when he came to the garden seven years ago. Quistis was an orphan, just like Squall, and she too had spent her formative years in an orphanage. However, being exceptionally gifted, Quistis had gone to study at the Garden immediately. She hadn't spent any time at all in the company of unloving foster parents or children's homes. All she knew about the world was what she learned at the Garden. When Squall came from the halfway house, she'd taken him under her wing. She was a year older, and he was so frightened and lonely. He didn't talk much and to this day she didn't know much about his past. She'd always wished he would talk to her more, but sometimes he did listen. Squall was her rock, but only when he felt like it. From day to day she never knew what kind of mood he'd be in, because he hid his emotions so well. So it was a constant guessing game to figure out how he was feeling before she pissed him off and he walked away. It was this mercurial side to him that had always bugged her. Sometimes she wondered if he considered her a friend at all, and even more unlikely, if he'd think of her as more than just that. She did nothing but give to him, and he gave her so little in return and even then, only if he was in the mood for giving. 

_What a frickin' ass! _ She thought, her temper rising and boiling over she exploded, "GOD! You're so cold sometimes! I asked you here because I _thought_ you were my friend! I should have known better than to ask you and maybe I was wrong but I needed to talk to someone"

That was the last straw.... It'd been a long, weird night for Squall. He was in enough emotional turmoil on his own and he didn't need to be taking shit from Quistis too. Unable to control himself, he lost his temper. "You _thought_ wrong....Deal with it yourself, I'm tired of being your fucking emotional tampon...if you need to bitch about your problems that badly, then go talk to a wall because I sure as hell don't care."

A look of deep hurt mixed with deep sorrow overtook Quistis' face. He knew how to hurt her....he always had...he could always pick just the right words that would totally devastate her. She hated him sometimes..... Her lower lip trembled and after a time she spoke again.  "Squall..." she said, her voice shaking, on the verge of tears, "You will realize someday that you may actually need someone else.... You can sit here and pretend you don't until your face turns blue. The reality is, you DO need other people. I only hope you see that before you look around and find that you really are alone."

She paused, waiting for the inevitable rebuttal...the I DON'T NEED ANYBODY...ALL PEOPLE DO IS GET IN YOUR WAY.....typical Squall idiotic bullshit. He just heaved a sigh, looking at her with eyes as wounded as her own. No smart remarks.... no biting sarcasm...nothing. What the hell was going on? This was a vast change in demeanor.... Squall wasn't an easy guy to read and she could never tell what was going on in that head of his but he was giving off a definite vibe. Even if he didn't feel like arguing with her, at the very least he'd say whatever and be done with it...not this. She could see a great well of sadness in his eyes, the kind of heartbreak that only one who'd experienced it could see. 

"Squall...are you okay?" 

Crossing his arms over his chest, he looked away, realizing his internal pain had been broadcast.

"Please...what's wrong?" she pleaded, hating herself for letting him make her beg. 

_That girl_..._that girl he'd been dancing with. That had to be it!_ It hit her like lightening... _he'd fallen for that girl_..._ more than just a schoolboy crush_..._he was in love with some girl he just met!_...._son of a bitch_...

"Dammit, was it that girl!?" she blurted out, angry and just a bit jealous, "Oh my god, It IS...isn't it?!! You dance with some girl you've just met like you've known her forever, but you can barely have a civil conversation with someone you've known for seven years! This is rich! So what now? Are you in love with her?"

He drew in a small gasp, his eyes widening. He answered sharply, "NO! It's N-N-N-NUH-None of y-y-y-yu-yuh-your b-business..."Squall stopped, clapping a hand over his traitor mouth. 

Quistis stared at him in absolute disbelief. She remembered him telling her how bad his stutter had been as a kid. He used to get ranked out all the time, until one of his many foster parents had helped cure him of it. Occasionally, when he first came to Balamb he still stuttered, mostly when Seifer picked on him. Seifer had a way of finding your weakness and exploiting it.... _But God, Squall hadn't stuttered like that in years_..... Shaking he stormed out of the atrium, Quistis following close behind.

"Squall...wait...."

He stopped and with his back turned he whispered, "Please.... leave me alone.... I..."

"No...Don't...That was unfair. I'm sorry," she said, reaching out her hand and touching his shoulder, she could feel him shrink away from her contact, " I guess I'm still upset about my demotion...I've failed as an instructor and a friend." She couldn't help it, she began to cry.

His shoulders slumped and without turning he said, "No...no you haven't failed. Your teaching methods are unconventional but you are a good instructor.... Don't let it get to you. I gotta go."

She withdrew her hand and watched him leave, silently wiping away her tears. Funny, that a stranger could touch his heart and affect him so deeply...succeeding where she had failed so many times.

"Lucky girl..." she said in a choked whisper, filled with bitter regret.

Squall was still trembling when he got back to his room. He nervously ran his fingers through his hair, cursing himself silently. _I fucking stuttered_...._I can't believe I stuttered_...._ What's happening to me_...? He sat on his bed and closed his eyes tightly. _One minute everything's okay, I had it all figured out and the next it's all screwed_..._at least Zell wasn't awake, that was good_.... He sighed shakily, _God I'm a mess_...Stripping off the uniform jacket, Squall flopped down on the bed and stared at the flat nothingness of the ceiling. All the time his mind was working.... clicking off the details of the entire day over and over and over and over again...Finally too tired to continue he let sleep take him. 

He was in the field of flowers again........ He wasn't alone, there was the girl..._with angel wings?....she turned..._Are you an angel_?...and kicked up a flurry of feathers and petals...they danced gracefully around her, she shook her head as she smiled...The girl..._Angel_....floated towards him, her light blue dress billowing behind her in the breeze...her black hair..._like midnight_.... whipping around her face gently, like the fronds of an anemone........She mouthed his name..._Squall_....no sound came out but he could still hear her voice, it lingered in his mind......She turned again, slowly disappearing into a cloud of mist..._I'm waiting_....he noticed that she didn't have wings at all.......though he could have sworn...it was a pattern, white angel wings woven into the fabric of her dress.... _I'll be with you_ ... _Don't go_... he shouted...dreamily her form vanished entirely, petals and feathers falling together in a bizarre torrent..._please, don't leave me._..._

_"WAIT!! PLEASE_.._DON'T_....._"_ Someone was shaking him violently, he suddenly felt very bad for that person....he might have to punch them if they didn't knock it off. 

"SQUALL! WAKE UP!!  You're dreaming...."

It was Zell; he looked concerned, yet slightly bemused. Every bone creaked as he lifted himself off the bed and he was covered in sweat. He felt and probably looked like hell. Squall rubbed his eyes, staving off another monster headache, a leftover present from last night. 

"What time is it?" Squall croaked hoarsely. 

"Ten o' clock....."

"Damn.... is it really that late?"

" Yeah .....Dude, that must've been one helluva dream....you woke me up with all your screaming....man..." Zell said, changing the subject quickly, sticking his tongue between his teeth with a silly grin,  "Soooo what happened last night with Prof. Trepe?"

Squall winced, Quistis... "I'd rather not talk about it...."

"Ouch! That bad, huh?" Zell whistled, pausing a moment....his face changed, a look of solemn concern came over it,  "Can I ask you something, in all seriousness?"

"What?" 

"Are you really okay? I mean, after the exam you kinda flaked or something. You were just actin' weird last night...I'm just worried, that's all"

Squall sighed, his voice trembling with repressed emotion, "I'm....okay....I guess....I don't know....I've been having trouble sleeping lately, that's all......it's nothing...."

"Hmmm...Maybe it's cause everything is changing so fast, you know...it's like...everything's ending.... you're not a kid anymore and you have all these new adult responsibilities on your shoulders..... You don't know what to do...I feel a little directionless too; I think all of us do.  Like, You've worked this far, now what? We expected all the answers would be handed to us once we graduated, but there are none....Now we all have to go out into the world and find the answers...and all you can think is, it's so big and I'm so small...Nothing stays the same and it's hard to deal with all the changes...just gotta stop stressing about it, that's all." 

"You're probably right......." Squall said, honestly awed at that profundity of that nature would come out of someone like Zell.

"Heh! It'll all make more sense once we get assigned to squads and get our first real jobs as SeeDs...Need help moving out?" 

"No...I don't have that much stuff...do you need help?" 

"Pffffttt...YAH! I got TOO MUCH CRAP!" 

"Alright then, after I'm finished I'll come help you.... got any boxes?"

"Yup.." Zell disappeared, coming back in a few minutes later with a small pile of boxes, "here you go..."

"Thanks...."

"No prob bob....." Zell said, pulling another one of his faces and taking off for his own room.

Squall sat there for a few minutes after Zell had left, thinking about what he'd said. There was a lot of truth there.... His entire life all he wanted to do was become a SeeD, his one and only goal. Now that he was a SeeD, he no longer had a definite goal to reach. It felt good, knowing that he wasn't crazy or messed up.... just directionless. Once he was assigned and had his first job everything would get better. In the back of his mind there was still a nagging voice that told him that it's not as simple as that...you can't just say poof and make all your worries disappear. There was still something he was missing...he pushed down his feelings of unease.  Squall changed quickly and started to pack up his stuff. He had precious little in the way of personal belongings. It went back to his years in foster homes, he moved so much that it was impossible to keep much stuff around. His time at Balamb had been the longest he'd spent in one place. 

Funny, he felt fleeting feelings of sentimentality about leaving this dorm room.  It'd been his only permanent home for going on seven years. After deciding to go to the Garden, he'd left the halfway house almost immediately. Arriving in Balamb, Cid had personally shown him to his room.... Squall remembered being really happy at the prospect of having his own room for once. His bright mood had faded when he realized that he'd have to share it with another student.... he had been hoping to have one all to himself. Gradually he changed his mind a bit, he didn't mind his first roommate.... he had been much older than Squall, around fifteen or so. His name was Leon... Squall thought he was so cool...his hair was bleached blonde and ratted up into spikes. They had a lot in common; he was a loner like Squall and disliked most of the people he came into contact with. Young and impressionable, Squall looked up to Leon, kinda seeing him as an older brother figure. Leon had taught him a lot about fighting, showed him how to defend himself....even how to project an _I don't care_ type attitude.  They'd practice together for hours in the training room, going over various moves and techniques. Leon had used a gunblade...It was a rarely used weapon, being very difficult to master without years of training. 

The gunblade was a truly unique weapon, it looked much like a gun with a large sword blade attached. Unlike a traditional gun, it didn't use ammo, substituting projectile ammunition for energy based non-elemental magic. It took a tremendous amount of control and almost infinite patience to use the thing properly. To add to all that, gunblades were very heavy, users had to bulk up their arms before being able to even lift the weapon.  Leon had begun to teach him how to use it, helping Squall strengthen his arms so that he could lift it without help. He taught him several meditation techniques that worked to help improve his concentration and his ability to control the immense magical power of the weapon. Squall trained underneath Leon for three years, until he graduated and left the Garden, and owed all his expertise with the gunblade to him. Shortly thereafter, Zell had moved in.....

He shook his head, _daydreaming again_.... Squall looked over his small room. It was mostly devoid of decoration and one could barely tell that anyone occupied it at all.  He had little need of posters or wall decoration when all he did in it was sleep and read. However, the small bookcase near his bed was full of books, large and small, on a variety of subjects. He'd read all the books in his room more than once, and the local bookshops knew him by name. Squall had an eclectic taste when it came to the books he read.  His favorite type was poetry, but he was also dipped into an occasional work of fiction or philosophy.  He had collected several tomes that dealt with various subjects in the fields of science, nature, and history. One was a fascinating medical textbook, it had profiles of various case files that dealt with rarely seen diseases. At first glance it was pretty gross but the text itself was fascinating, describing the diagnosis and treatment plan the doctors had decided on. His favorite case study dealt with a young girl that had gone into an inexplicable and sudden coma. They ended up taking her up to a treatment facility established only recently in the new space station now orbiting the earth. In the anti-gravity atmosphere of space she recovered as suddenly as she had gone in to the coma in the first place. The reporting doctor wrote on how mystified he was by the rapid and unnatural rate of recovery in the girl. To this day, exactly why she fell and then woke from her coma is a mystery.... still creeped him out just thinking about it.   
            Directly opposite his bed and bookcase was his neatly arranged desk. Like the rest of the room, there was precious little decoration on his desk. There was a cup with a few pens and pencils in it, a neatly stacked set of folders and notebooks, and a small model of the space ship Ragnarock. He'd picked up the model a few years ago at a local hobby shop in Balamb City. It had been fun putting it together, an exercise in patience and fine motor skills, appealing to his meticulous nature. On the windowsill, near his desk, were a pair of broad leaf potted plants, a detail which most would think out of character for someone as cold and indifferent as Squall. However, there was a certain amount of joyous harmony that was brought about when he cared for the plants. Watching them grow, spreading their leaves, flowering, there were hardly words to express how that made him feel. To put it simply, since he had cut off the normal ties of friendship that knit the web of humanity together, he substituted the care and time he would've spent on friends and instead doted on his plants.

Opening one of the boxes Zell had given him, Squall began to pack up his few belongings and move on to his new room and life as a SeeD. All in all, it took him less than two hours to box everything up and stack it outside his room, ready for moving into his new place. Zell, on the other hand, was _still_ struggling with the very large job of packing up his room. Squall strolled into the chaos that Zell had once called home, wondering how one could stuff so much crap into one small room. 

"What can I do..." Squall asked, stopping short as he looked around at the mess with cautious apprehension. 

Zell looked up, pointed and said, "Get a box and start throwing shit in over there....I tried the careful approach but it took too much time....."

Squall went where Zell had pointed and began to throw anything within reach into the box. Zell stopped and looked around, making a goofy face.

"Something's wrong....it's too quiet....Mind if I put some music on?" 

"Nope...." Squall replied, putting a weird mobile made of bottle caps and tufts of cafeteria napkins in the box....he paused and stared at it for a moment..._What the HELL was it? God, Zell was a strange guy sometimes_.  With Zell's music blaring loudly, he continued.... boxing up little action figures, photographs of Zell with friends and family, a sculpture of a man made out of lint, triple-triad cards, candles, and other assorted bits of flotsam and jetsam that littered the small room. _How did he even sleep in here_? In the end, it took four hours to completely pack up and empty Zell's room. By the time they'd finished, the moving crews had come and proceeded to load their boxes on individual skiffs bound for their new rooms. 

"Hey...it'll be a few till they get all our stuff to the rooms....Wanna go with me and return our dorm keys?" Zell asked cheerfully.

"Sure..." 

They walked down the lively corridors of Balamb Garden. Squall walking quietly, his hands in his pockets, with Zell bopping and strutting around like a doofus next to him. It must have been quite a sight to watch the two of them strolling down the halls together. A sullen loner with his bee-bopping punk side kick...The thought struck Squall as being so humorous that he had a hard time keeping a straight face. They made it to the registrars office just before they began to close up for the day. Stepping up to the counter, a young cadet hopped up to assist them quickly. She was kinda cute, for a girl with bright pink hair anyway...

"Can I help you two?" she asked, chipperly. 

"Yup, we've come to drop off our old room keys.... we just graduated.." said Zell, trying way too hard to sound smooth. Then he grinned like a total jackass, which made the cadet titter behind her hand. 

"Okay...well, you both have to fill out these forms...." she said, desperately trying to keep her composure, "Once you're done come back and give them to me and we can finish up..."

The clerk gave them some pens to write with and they started to fill out the forms.  She went into the back to wait for them both to finish.

"So...you think she likes me?" 

Squall looked at him and scrunched his face up, "I don't know...I guess...."

"I've been working on her for awhile....I'm hoping she'll go with me to the Garden festival...You goin'"

"Ahhh......No"

"Dude.... You gotta come......at least show me some of those phat dance moves....." 

"I don't know if you're ready for them yet..." Squall replied in total seriousness and then a small smile spread across his face,  "You might screw 'em all up and ruin my rep as the mac daddy of the school..."  

Zell looked at him for a moment, confusion melting into understanding, he began to laugh, "Just when I figure you out, you turn the tables.... let's hurry up and finish...I should get to my new room and at least try to unpack."

Squall finished up first and turned in his paperwork to the young lady at the window. He waited around and after a few minutes Zell finally wrapped it up, turning it in all the while flirting with the young clerk. Getting bored, Squall stomped over to Zell and tapped him on his arm.

"It's time to go Smoove-b....." 

"Yeah...." Zell answered, handing the girl a small slip of paper before leaving, "Here's my cell number.... give me a call..."

They walked the empting halls together, both of them silent. In the now mostly quiet hall a sudden tumult came from one of the classrooms near the registrars office. A door opened and then slammed shut. They could see Seifer stalking down the hallway... His face was twelve shades of red, looking as if he might tear off the head of the next person he met. The door opened again and Xu burst out of it, looking just as angry as Seifer. She followed him as he thundered past Squall and Zell, who just looked on in amazement. 

"Seifer.... If you value your career here at all you'll turn around right now and get yourself back in that room..." Xu shouted as she picked up speed to catch up. 

He spun around, his nostrils flaring and bellowed back, "I'M NOT GOING _ANYWHERE_ AS LONG AS I'M HERE! YOU JUST WANT TO RAIL ROAD ME AND SHOVE YOUR BULL SHIT DOWN MY THROAT! FUCK THAT.....YOU CAN TAKE MY CAREER AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!"

Xu stopped dead, a look of surprise and indignant anger flushed her fine features. "I WILL not be spoken to like that....I AM YOUR SUPERIOR OFFICER! Show just a LITTLE respect.....Now if you wish to continue on here I suggest you put your ego in your pocket and try to salvage what you have....as it is I see very little in the way of a future here or anywhere else for you...."

"Well..... Maybe it's because I have such shitty teachers!" 

"Don't try and shove the blame on your teachers.... You're a lousy student, if you applied yourself and followed orders you wouldn't be here now. The only person who you should be blaming is yourself!"

Seifer looked at Squall, his eyes glassed over with tears of rage, "We could've been heroes..." Squall said nothing back, merely staring with disbelief at the scene laid before him.  Seifer whipped his head back in Xu's direction and growled, "Screw this shit....I'm leaving"  With that he charged down the hallway, punching the wall with his fist and screaming. 

"Damn it all to hell..." Xu hissed, and without a word to Zell or Squall she ran back to the room she'd come from. 

A few minutes later she returned with a pair of security guards, they sprinted down the hall with her in the direction Seifer had gone. Squall and Zell stood there in stunned silence for a few minutes, not quite knowing what to do. They looked at each other and began to laugh hysterically. 

Holding his stomach, Zell gasped between gales of laughter, "God...I almost shat myself.... the look on Seifer's face....did you see the big pulsing vein on his forehead? I was terrified it might blow at any moment....." 

"KABOOM!" Squall said, raising his hand to his forehead and mimicking an explosion. This got them both laughing harder.

They staggered down the hall laughing like a pair of drunk idiots. Eventually they reined themselves in and the laughter subsided into chuckles. They had made it to the Cherry Blossom Pavilion, their new homes as SeeDs. 

"So...where's your new digs?" Zell asked casually. 

" 303-D....Why? Gonna miss me?" 

"Yeah...I don't know....I guess it's your sparkling personality. Seriously.... It's been real.... I'm in 322-D, right in the same neighborhood, I know you're not all about hanging out 'n stuff...but let's hook up every now and then, N'kay....LaTAH!" 

"Yeh...See you..." Squall said with a quiet smile and waived as Zell took off running for his new room. 

He walked the silent hallways of the Pavilion, the sun setting over the horizon slowly. Squall watched as the sky turned from a bright blazing set of reds and oranges, to gentle shades of purple and pink. The incident with Seifer had put things in perspective. Tomorrow he'd get his first assignment as a SeeD....what would Seifer have to look forward to tomorrow? Squall was lucky...he had a future, at the very least direction of some kind. He didn't have a clear goal yet, but at least where he was going it would lead to something. Seifer had nothing.....no job....no goal....no achievements....no direction.... no future..... In a way, Squall almost pitied him; however, the grim reality was, Seifer had made bad choices and now he had to deal with them.....he could either learn from them or blame others. It was obvious to Squall how Seifer was going to react. He wouldn't learn, he wouldn't grow, he'd just push his mistakes on others, blaming them for his own poor judgment. _Fool_....

Squall mused again on the young lady he'd danced with.....It pained him a bit to remember it....He admitted in part that he wanted very much to see her again, not really knowing why. _Useless_...he thought....._I'll never see her again, so I just might as well forget her_. It was then he started the tedious process of erasing her from his heart. It'd take time, but in the long run, it was the right thing to do. 

Squall paused briefly and entered his new room. It was much larger than his old room with Zell. His few boxes where piled in the middle of the room. There was a large living area, already semi-decorated, with a big, over stuffed sofa against one wall and set into the other wall there were two sets of bookshelves. The floor of his living area covered in hardwood paneling, a large and ornate rug carpeting the majority of the room.  Near the back left of the living room was a dinky kitchenette, separated from the rest of the living space by a small wall. To the right was the entrance to the master bedroom, which was also quite large. There was a full sized bed on the left, and sitting next to the bed was a nightstand. On the right there was  a large wood desk, complete with a hulking grayish computer and a small, innocuous manila folder on it. Near his new desk, was the door that led to the bathroom. Squall strode into the room, looking about and taking in the features of his new home. He went immediately to the desk and grabbed the manila folder, ripping it open. It contained a packet of files and papers. Squall began to read the first of the memos, on the top of the packet.

_Attention New SeeD member! _

_This memo is to inform you that you have been chosen to represent Squad A as captain. This position comes with much responsibility. We have assessed that you have what it takes to be a leader. With this in mind, we have provided you with detailed information on your mission and the two SeeDs we have chosen to serve under you. Hopefully, everything we've given you will help in your mission ahead. Good Luck!_

He sat there stunned for a moment or two...Squall could hardly believe what he'd read. He never thought for a moment they'd pick him for a squad leader. _How'd this_ _happen?_ He thought...._I'm no leader_!!  A part of him was thrilled but the overwhelming feeling he had was fear. Being the captain meant taking on the responsibility of successfully completing the mission, as well as having the lives of two other SeeDs in his hands. He was afraid of failing...afraid that if he made the wrong choice he'd not only fuck up the mission but be responsible for SeeD members getting hurt or worse.

 He leafed through the rest of the papers, not paying particular attention to what was written on them. Apparently, they'd be going to Timber, to help some resistance group there. Timber was another town near the Galbadian border. Being quite a small town, without the money or manpower of a larger city, like Dollet. Timber quickly fell to the invading Galbadian armies. In response, most of the citizenry of Timber were hardly welcoming to the occupying troops. Many locals formed various resistance groups, dedicated to liberating their city from the hands of the Galbadians. One of the papers listed the names and ideologies of the various factions that were active. _The Timber Wolves, The Shining Hand, The Forest Owls, Averlanche_....._Averlanche? I guess spelling isn't a requirement for joining these groups_. '_Boy, are we in for it,'_ Squall thought dryly.   

Stopping on the last few pages, the ones that dealt with his two team members. It lacked their names but listed their specialties, most likely chosen to aid in the completion of their mission. It gave general statistics, weight, eye color, etc.. Both were expert in hand-to-hand combat and used close range weapons. He wondered if his teammates had received a similar package. Probably did, the Headmaster was keen on "surprising" his students. Cid had always said that he thought it was more fun to add a little mystery to life. Squall disagreed, he thought it was childish and pointless and it was one of the only things he disliked about Cid. No use in going over it again and again...one of the postscripts on the memo noted that he should meet with all the other new SeeDs tomorrow at nine o'clock. There he'd get his rank and finally meet his mysterious team members.  He hardly liked the idea of being captain of his squad, but it was too late to do anything about it. Besides, it could be much worse....he could be Seifer. He set the packet back down on his desk and went into the living room to unpack.


	6. What Dreams May Come

Squall had woken up early that morning and decided to get some practice in before he had to go to the meeting. He fought in the training room for about an hour before he quit to go back to his room and change. He entered his new and best of all, quiet dorm room. It was neat and tidy, a big feat, considering it had been filled with boxes and packing detritus the night before. He'd worked hard to unpack everything and give it a home before he left on his first mission. He disliked the idea of leaving his room in anything but perfect order, made him feel like there were no loose ends.  He even remembered to arrange for a freshman cadet to come in and water his plants while he was away. The morning was already well on its way, he quickly showered and changed into a comfortable pair of black jeans and a white t-shirt. Squall looked around, sitting on _his_ new couch, looking over _his_ new room. _Everything in perfect order_, he thought happily, frowning a little when he came to his bookshelves.  They were sadly emptier than they had been in his old room He'd have to remedy that, hopefully he might get a chance to stock up on his trip. A knock at the door broke his reverie... Opening the door, it was Zell, who was dressed in the loudest ensemble he'd ever seen.  He had on a black and red jacket, with blue flames emblazoned on the shoulders, a pair of very baggy shorts, and bright red shoes with black accents. _Different strokes_.... 

"Hurry up! We'll be late...." Zell said breathlessly, having ran from his dorm to Squall's.

Squall checked the watch he'd been wearing, _Shit, he's  right_... _Nice start Mr. Leader_... He let Zell in, offering him a drink while he changed, to which Zell gratefully accepted. Squall left him in the living room, entering his bedroom to get ready. The pants and shirt he wore were okay, he quickly slipped on a pair of socks and his heavy riding boots. Opening the closet he took out his fur trimmed black leather jacket. It had taken him a long time to save up his salary from the Garden for that jacket, it was worth the trouble though. The last touch was a lion pendant, it had been a gift from Sis and there was an engraving on the back in a language Squall didn't know. 

Zell popped his head in and asked, "Ready?"

Squall walked out  of his room, his heavy boots clicking against the hard wood floor. "Yeah..." he answered, looking and feeling like a bad ass, "Let's go."

They arrived in Cid's office in more than enough time. The other cadets who passed were milling about, chitchatting with each other while they waited for Cid and Xu to arrive. 

Out of the crowd, Selphie hopped up to Zell and Squall, a wide grin on her cherubic face,  "HEY!" she chirped, "How are you guys!?"

"Great....and you?" Zell answered, a goofy grin spreading across his face.

"I'm terrific! Hey Squall!" 

Squall didn't answer, just nodded at Selphie and stood there quietly observing the other students.  _He is so quiet_....Selphie thought....It really bothered her that he spoke so little...._gosh, I just wanna shake him and scream LIGHTEN UP!!_ She refused to worry about it too much, though...If Squall wanted to be Mr. Quiet Head he could....she was a happy-go-lucky type of person and a bit of a ditz, she didn't have the time or the will to think about depressing stuff. 

"I'm sooooooooo excited!!! We get our ranks, our squad assignments, and our first jobs today!!" 

Zell yawned and replied slowly, "Don't get too excited just yet....I've heard your first job sucks knobs, least that's what Quistis told me."

"OOoooooooo....Don't be a party pooper! Whatever we get is fine by me!!" wrinkling her nose up, she socked Zell in the arm. 

"Ow...you sure are a violent girl!", smiling a little while rubbing his arm, "Always hitting my friggin' arm...MAN! Outta sock you...see how you like it."

"You drive me to it.... AND I'd really give it to you if you tried to hit me....butthead..."

He laughed and ruffled the top of her head, as he did so, she slapped at his hands a bit and made a funny squeaking noise_. WHAT A DOWNER_! Selphie thought..._It doesn't matter what I'm doing, I'll be happy anywhere they choose to put me_...She had learned a long time ago that worrying about every little thing that didn't go your way was pointless and stupid. Horrible things happen all the time, the only thing you can do is move on and learn from your mistakes. Selphie had never been anything but cheerful. Her gregarious good nature had won her many friends at Trabia, and she had already made quite a few at Balamb as well. She was excited about finally graduating from the Garden and could hardly wait to write to her many friends and family back home. Her adoptive parents would be so happy and proud to see how far their little girl had gone!! She'd set up a special web site that detailed her experiences at her new Garden, making it easier for those she'd left behind in Trabia to see how she was doing. She planned to write all about her job and her team members on her site. One of her big goals was to become a famous writer someday!!  However, the mystery of her assignment was almost too much to bear!!  At that moment, Headmaster Cid entered the office, FINALLY...she'd have an answer!!

The new SeeDs lined up quickly and saluted Cid as he made his way up to the front of the room, near his desk. 

"Good Morning, SeeD members..." Cid said, his wide, chubby face glowing with pride, " At ease, I'm here to confer upon you the ranks and squad assignments as SeeD members. You should all have received your packages last night, detailing your first job, as well as profiles of your future team mates. At the end of this ceremony, each of the captains will step forward...Then we will announce which squad they will be leading. After the announcement I'd like you to meet with your squad members. As you will be spending lots of time with them, it is appropriate to get to know each other...Now..." 

He motioned to the mechanical faculty and with great ceremony Cid stepped up to each student. Shaking their hand, he handed them their diplomas and then whispered something in turn to each SeeD. When he came to Squall, Cid paused, looking at him with fatherly affection....._How far had this boy come_....._I couldn't be prouder if he was my own_...Cid thought, getting a little teary eyed as he did so..._what a foolish old man I am_..__

"It's nice to finally have a gunblade expert in our ranks....You've done so well, my boy...congratulations..." he said, his voice crackling a bit with emotion,  "I'd like to see you and your squad after this....If that's alright with you."

Squall nodded and quietly answered, "Yes, sir.."

Before leaving, he clapped Squall on the arm....his eyes still brimming with affection and pride. Squall watched as Cid finished up with the other students....thinking a bit back to the day he first met Cid. His emotions were stifled, but there was still a twinge of joy that the man he considered almost a father was so proud of him. Cid finally handed out all the diplomas and again addressed the SeeDs. 

"You all have your assignments as SeeDs.....You are our future, before you're dismissed and you leave for your various jobs....I'd like to tell you how very proud I am of all of you. I wish you all success! Now...Xu, if you will do the honors of announcing squads..."

Xu stepped up quickly from the back of the room, where she'd been waiting quietly the entire ceremony out of the view. Always the efficient type, she began immediately, "Squad A, Squall Leonhart, Squad B,  Nida Tarkin, Squad C, Terra Brandfort, Squad D, Koran Mufuda....You're all dismissed."

Everyone milled around, until they found their individual squads....Chattering incessantly, most of the other SeeDs started to trickle out of the office and into the hall. This continued until only Squall and his other team mates were left. Perhaps he shouldn't have been surprised that it was Zell and Selphie that made up the rest of Squad A. Zell looked at Squall, his rubber mask of a face grinning like a jackass. Selphie could barely contain herself, she was so excited, hopping from one foot to the other. Squall was less vociferous, but nodded at his team mates. Cid motioned them over to his desk and all three Seeds sat down, wondering why they had a private conference and no one else did. 

"Do any of you know why I've asked for a private conference with you three?" Cid asked, as if reading their minds.

All three of them looked at each other, totally clueless, and shrugged. 

"Well of course you don't, because I haven't told you yet.", a mischievous smile spreading across his face, "You three graduated with the highest marks in your class, not only that, but all of you took some of the most difficult and time consuming classes during your schooling here. You are amongst the Gardens best and brightest....it's well known that your first assignment is your hardest. This applies double for you....How much do you all know about Timber?"

"It's a small city located in the south eastern area of Galbadia. Once known for its rich forest land, which is being diminished each day by occupying Galbadian forces. Conquered ten years ago in a small skirmish. Locals haven't taken kindly to occupation and have formed several resistance groups. Most are just extremist factions, only interested in total chaos, but a slim few actually are dedicated to freeing Timber from the control of Galbadia and its tyrannical President/Dictator, Vinzer Deling." Squall answered, in his firm but always quiet voice. 

"WOW!" Zell exclaimed and then said, in a semi-serious tone, "Yeah, what he said...."

Cid chuckled,  "Squall, you're prepared as usual.....I'm assuming you two have taken time to read up on your assignment?"

"Of course, sorry 'bout the joke.." Zell replied, sheepishly. 

"Yes sir!" Selphie chirped. 

"Good, then we're all on the same page. I've assigned you three to help out one of the local resistance groups, something you all might have already guessed. This faction is one of the few groups that are serious about freeing Timber. I've given this assignment to you three because you are the best we have. However, one of the things I look for in a first assignment is a chance for you all to learn and grow as members of SeeD. You need unity to succeed as a team....this first assignment is a test of that." Cid paused momentarily, his face took on a grim tone and he continued, "I've also given this to you because I  have a personal stake in the success of this mission. The political situation in Timber is very delicate, and riots could break out anytime....also, the daughter of a very dear friend belongs to this group....."

Cid was about to go on, but one of the faculty members interrupted him to whisper, as well as they could anyway, in his ear. Irritated, he frowned and muttered something back at it quickly. Turning his attention back to the SeeDs, he addressed them again, scowling at the faculty member, "Needless to say....Use discretion on this mission. Here are your train tickets. Assemble at the gate in one hour and depart immediately. The ride there takes well over a week and a half, so pack a only those things that will be of use to you. Now, this is important, once you arrive in Timber one of the faction members will contact you. There's a code you must complete before he or she will lead you back to their base....You'll be asked, _The forests of Timber sure have changed_...and you must answer, _Yes, but the owls are still around_... If you have any problems or questions, please call us... Well, that's it....Good luck."

Squall and his new team mates left Cid's office, parting company to pack up a few belongings. He supposed he could've done worse than Zell and Selphie. The review board had probably picked them because all three had done so well together on the exam, considering the circumstances. The future looked much, much brighter to Squall and gone was the depression that had threatened to overtake him. However, in its place was a quiet pensiveness as he mulled on where the future would take him. He wondered about this mission to Timber and Cid's strangely cryptic comment on it being a personal favor for a friend. Frankly, he was a little offended at being asked to baby-sit a bunch of amateurs. Beyond even that, he disliked the idea of doing a mission that had been assigned as a personal favor, it stank of nepotism and he didn't like it. _Orders were still orders, even if they make you sick_....he thought, hoping he wouldn't come to regret not questioning Cid's decision. 

 It took less than a half hour for all three SeeDs to ready themselves for their trip to Timber. The best part was, they had been issued their own car to drive to the Balamb Train Station in Balamb City. There was an initial fracas over who would drive it, mostly between Zell and Selphie. Squall solved the argument by deciding, as leader, that he'd drive it. _Being the boss had some perks_.....he thought devilishly, as he drove the hot red convertible down the small highway that lead to Balamb City. Nearing the city limits, Zell became a bit anxious.

Zell was also a bit nervous about the coming mission, it was his first time outside Balamb for an extended period. He had spent his whole life here....Balamb was his home. Most of his family were local fishermen, spending their lives harvesting the sea. Zell lived most of his life in the care of his Aunt Anna, his father's sister. Like most of his generation, he was an orphan....his mother and father both killed in the deadly conflict of the Sorceress war that ended almost seventeen years ago. 

It had been a time of chaos, a sorceress named Adel had taken over the large continent of Esthar and proceeded to declare war on the whole world. It had started in Centra, a once sizeable country that had been completely obliterated by the end of the war. There was no land not touched by that war....it had scarred the entire planet and left a generation of orphans and widows. 

Unlike most of his family, his Da had decided to go for a career in the military. A move which greatly displeased Zell's grandma, who's own husband was lost in war many, many years ago. Both his father and grandfather had been excellent martial artists, a trait they'd passed on to him. The whole reason Zell wanted to go to the Garden in the first place was to become as great as they had been.  His father met Zell's mother while serving in the Balamb Marine Corp. Between missions they had married and eventually made time to have a baby. They had decided to take temporary leave of the army, just until Zell's mother had time to recover from birth. She had resolved to raise her son, while her husband would go and continue his tour in the war. It was then that the Sorceress had decided to attack Balamb, a fleeting gasp from a foe that was nearly defeated.  They'd been out for a stroll along the boardwalk near his home, their first since his birth. He'd been left at home, with a babysitter. More than likely, they didn't even realize what hit them before they died. It was that quick. Zell's parents had been caught in the crossfire, and they paid with their lives.  

When the wreckage was cleared, Zell had been sent to an orphanage and was kept there until he was around four years old. Thankfully, one of his family members had finally managed to track him down and bring him home. It was his Aunt Anna, who had looked so long and hard for her lost nephew. She and her husband raised him like he was their own and had done their best to make sure Zell knew what great people his parents had been. Even allowing the boy to go to a military school, despite his parents tragic end. He treasured his Aunt and Uncle, his only living family.

He cautiously asked, "Um...would it be okay if we made a stop at my house...I'd like to say good-bye to my Aunt Anna. I promised I'd see her before I go."

"Yeah, sure..." Squall said casually, "Where does she live?"

"84th and Lyon Street, the second apartment on the right..."

They arrived a few minutes later in the small, but comfortable apartment, occupied by Zell's beloved Aunt. She was a small, squat woman in her forties, her hair still a dark brown with only small flecks of gray. She had a round, jovial face that was careworn with age lines, made by too much sun and too much laughing. He entered the small apartment with lots of noise. 

"HEY! MA! I'M HOME!" Zell shouted, slamming the door shut and in general making a raucous entrance.

Squall and Selphie followed him in, they both paused and looked at each other in mutual confusion. 

"Uh....I thought you said she was your aunt...." Squall said quietly, hoping not to offend Zell.

"Yeah, she is....but everybody 'round her calls her Ma...kind of a nickname. You'll understand when you meet her." 

At that moment Ma...or Aunt Anna...or whatever, bustled in with a looked of amused annoyance. She broke into a wide smile when she spotted Zell in the doorway. Quickly flipping the towel she'd been using for dishes over her shoulder and waggling a finger at him. 

"Zell Dincht, must you be that loud??" she chided, her voice lilting with a slight brogue, "Now what brings you about....You're not hungry, now, are ye? They don't feed you near well enough in that school of yours..."

"No, Ma...I'm not hungry and I'm eating fine...I just wanted to stop by and say good-bye...I finally graduated! Got my first job!". 

"Really then! My...I wish you're mother and father had lived to see this day....they'd be so proud of you.....Now come here and give your Auntie a hug...."

 hugging Zell tightly, she finally noticed Squall and Selphie, "Tch, You could have told me you'd be bringing visitors... would've whipped up a meal for you and your guests there...I'm so sorry he's so terribly rude!" ruffling his hair as she spoke, which sent Selphie into a laughing fit. 

"Aaaa...Ma...you're messing my hair up..."

"ACH! How can you tell with the way you spike it up like that?!!" waiving a hand dismissively at him, "Are you goin' ta introduce your visitors or should we just continue to stand about, staring at each other...Can't very well call them hey you...now can I?"

"Alright already..." Zell rolled his eyes and sighed deeply, as he tried to rearrange his flattened hair. " Ma, this is Squall Leonhart, my Squad Commander, and Selphie Timlett, third in command. Squall, Selphie....this is my Aunt Anna..."

"Nice to meet you Mrs. Dincht..." Squall said, very formally, and shook her hand. 

She clicked her tongue and smiled gently, "Now...Squall, is it? No need for formalities here...Please call me Ma or Anna but never Ms. Dincht...Much too fancy and high-minded for my tastes....not for a sassy ol' broad like me. "

Squall flushed with color, "Um...I'm sorry if I offende...."

"Ay, So serious are ye!? Tch tch...Ya haven't offended me. I'm a sailor's wife, there's nary a thing in the world that'd put me out..." She laughed cheerily, her hazel eyes twinkling with humor as she cut Squall off and quickly turned her attention to Selphie, "...Now then, Miss Selphie, is it? Aren't you a bonnie wee lass!"

Selphie giggled and squeaked, "Nice ta meet you Ma!"

"Nice to meet you as well..." looking over both Selphie and Squall, she clicked her tongue again, "My! You both are so skinny! What _do _they feed you over there? I really ought to..."

"Ummm...Ma....We don't have that much time, we gotta go." 

"Oh! Look it me! Silly old lady that I am, just prattling away....Now before you go, Zell...I'd like to give you something, wait here." Before he could object she disappeared into the back of the house, coming back several minutes later.  "Now...These were your father's when he was your age....I'd like you to have them.", handing Zell a pair of fighting gloves used exclusively by martial artists. They were black, with silver metal accents inlaid into the heavy leather of the gloves. 

Zell gasped, "Oh...Ma, I can't...I.."

"No...I'll have none of it....This is my graduation present to you. Besides, I think your Da would want you to have them. They're your birthright...Now go and fight with honor....I know I might not see you for awhile and you may not be able to write...but do an old lady a favor and check up on me whenever you can....I love you Zell...be careful" hugging him tightly again, tears spilling down her weathered face, "Oh... there I go! Be off with you....before you loose it too...."

"Bye Ma...I love you too and I'll miss you..." Zell said, small tears building in his eyes. He put on the gloves and left his home, waiving briefly before disappearing around the corner. Once he was out of view, he let the tears come....he didn't want Anna or his friends to see him crying. Nothing macho, mind you, but he was known as a bit of a goof....he'd rather put on the face of a silly joker, and not bring everyone down. Wiping away his tears, he entered the car and waited for his friends. 

"BYYYEEEEE!" Selphie exclaimed, hugging Anna and skipping out to the car to join Zell. 

"Good-Bye...Mrs. Dincht..." Squall said, bowing formally.

"Good-bye Squall.....Take care of Zell for me...." wiping the fresh tears from her face, patting him on the shoulder she added with a wry smile, "... and do me another favor, loose that serious streak of yours...You're much too handsome a lad to be so melancholy. It chases the lassies away..."  

Squall blushed again as Ma Dincht gave him a warm hug and bid him on his way. Entering the waiting car, Ma Dincht came out and waived as they drove off for the Balamb Train Station. She watched them go and offered up a silent prayer to the gods that they'd be okay. _Lord knows, we don't need to loose more young ones_....she worried to herself, while wringing the dish towel in her hands. 

The three SeeDs arrived at the train station with little time to spare. The train was about to leave as the steward began to shout the last call. They ran quickly up to the gate, handing the steward their tickets. He ripped them and ushered the trio aboard the train. Entering the small bay, another steward showed them to their private room, reserved by the Garden for the exclusive use of SeeDs only. 

"Wow! This is really cool!" Selphie said, looking around the small cabin in awe, "HEY! LOOK! We're moving!!" She jumped over to the open window and began to watch as the scenery of Balamb slid slowly past the train window. 

"Pretty impressive..." Squall said, whistling and flumping down on one of the plush chairs on the left of the cabin. He looked over at the three small bunks on the other side, "I suppose we should decide who gets what bunk...I don't really care which one I sleep on...."

Before anyone could answer, Selphie shouted,  "DIBS!!! I GET TOP!"

"Whoa....Leave it to Selphie to take the best bunk...Oh Well, then I guess I'll take the middle... That leaves the bottom for you, Squall....sorry."

"No big deal....I don't sleep well anyway... That aside...I think we should discuss a little about our up coming mission..."

"What do you mean?" Selphie asked, cocking her head.

"Well, first of all, I need to know both your specialties, so that our client, as well as myself, will be able to make use of your talents in the best way possible."

"Special rescue and field medicine....communications..." Zell replied, his face taking on an unnatural serious tone, "What'd you specialize in."

 "Tactics and Procedure......Selphie, what about you?"

"Computer systems, general machine operations and mechanics..." Selphie said, still watching the landscape whoosh past the window. 

"Wow..." Squall said, pausing for a moment...feeling kind of bad that he made the assumption that she seemed like such a ditz, hardly the type to go for computers and mechanics.

Selphie picked up on this and turned around, her lip stuck out indignantly, "What do you mean WOW! Just cus' I'm a girl doesn't mean I can't be interested in machines and computers..." Then she leaned over and socked him hard in the arm. 

"OW!" Squall said in surprise, to which Zell started to laugh, "It's not funny....that hurt!"

"Duh!! Mr. macho sexist pig boy...That'll teach you to make broad assumptions about girls..." indignantly sticking out her tongue at him. 

Zell smiled quietly and chuckled, "Finally, I'm not the one on the receiving end..."

"Just wait...your time will come..." Selphie answered, narrowing her eyes and making a face. She shook her head suddenly, her eyes fluttering tiredly, "Squall...I feel kinda funny....I'm tired..."

Squall looked at her, befuddled, "Then you better lay down..." Before he could get any further, she collapsed in a heap on the couch. Alarms rang inside his head, that was NOT natural. He went to her side quickly and began to try and shake her awake, "SELPHIE....WAKE UP....WAKE UP....."  _Nothing_...Zell slid over next to her, giving Squall a questioning look. 

"What's wrong with her?"

"How the hell should I know!? You're field medicine guy...you tell me!" 

Zell looked down at her, she looked like she was sleeping but....the way she'd collapsed suddenly was pretty weird. "Sleeping Gas, maybe....No...because that'd affect all of us..."  

"You're right...What do you think it could be, I mean besides sleeping gas..", it was funny but he felt a headache coming on...usually he only got those when he was stressed or overtired. 

"Come to think of it...I kinda feel tired too...I..." Zell began and then in mid-sentence crumpled over on the couch, next to Selphie. 

Squall stood up quickly...._it was sleeping gas_....he began to feel lightheaded...a terrible stab sent searing pain through his temples. He staggered around, touching his hand to his forehead. A high pitched whine buzzed in his ears, making the ambient sound of the room fuzzy and indistinct..._what's go_...Then he fell unconscious to the floor....a deep blackness enveloping his sight....

Laguna Loire found himself lost in the twisting streets of Deling City. He was a country boy at heart, coming from the small forest town of Timber. Deling City was so large, and seemingly its founding fathers hadn't planned the street layout , instead they'd just flipped a coin. _Damn city streets make no sense_...Laguna thought irritably to himself...._This is just par for the course_...Originally, he'd signed up for the Galbadian army as a chance to have an adventure, it turned out to be one big downer and he was seriously considering quitting. Besides, his real goal in life was to become a journalist, this was only a stepping stone, enough to get him out of Timber. What he didn't realize was, the army was more work than he thought it would be....you actually had get the job done and not just goof off. Being a college boy, he figured they'd give him some plush desk assignment, where he could sit on his duff and do paper work all day. Brilliant right? Wrongo!! Instead, they sent him off to some jungle to fight....it had been less than a pleasant experience and he'd tried hard to put it behind him. The cries from the wounded...the smell...the sounds...every horrible image you'd take for granted in a war movie. Thankfully, after a brief tour in the jungles of Esthar, he was on leave and had promised to meet a couple of friends at a local bar. _Which I'll be damned if  I can find..._he mused. Laguna was known for his terrible sense of direction and if he ever found the bar, he was more than sure that Kiros wouldn't let him forget it. Relieved, he spotted the sign for Walt Flannigan's and quickly entered. 

"Well, it's about time you showed up...lost again, were we?" Kiros asked, in his clipped Centra accent, his voice lilting with sarcasm, "We really ought to get you some kind of guide dog....."

"Nah," said a gruff voice, coming from behind Kiros. It was Ward.....he laughed, his voice a deep baritone, "Probably end up getting the dog lost..."

"Oh...Shut up...It's my first time in the city...and the dog'd get me lost, not the other way around." Laguna answered, a silly grin spreading across his face, "So has the show started up yet?"

"No....you haven't missed her....You must really have a thing for this Julia, you haven't stopped going on about her since we've met. I'm actually kind of anxious to have a look, really." Kiros said, slowly sipping a glass of wine....grinning a little he continued "I wonder how long we have until we leave again...maybe there'll be enough time for you to make music with her..."

Laguna blushed bright red at the very suggestion. Julia Heartilly was a very famous pianist. He'd first heard her on a local radio station that played only classical music. Instrumental music wasn't really his favorite, but there was something evocative and beautiful about the way Julia played. After that he bought all her records, even found out that she'd been playing in this bar in Deling City for the last three years. When they told him that he'd have leave here, he was more than thrilled. Finally a chance to see his favorite artist in the flesh....**_(where am I..??)_** .....Laguna shook his head...it was strange, but for a moment there it had seemed like a voice that wasn't his own....was in his head...weird. 

"You alright, mate?" Kiros asked, noting the odd look on his friends normally placid face and laying his hand on Laguna's shoulder.

"Yeah....faeries..." he said, waiving a hand distractedly.

"Faeries?" Ward questioned, looking at Laguna with bemused smile on his wide face.

"Yup, Faeries...like ever get that feeling you're being watched or when you shiver for no reason, when it's not even cold?"

"Yeah, I guess...." Ward replied, uncertainly.

"Back in Timber, when that happens we say that the faeries are dancing...you know, causing mischief...I just had a moment like that a minute ago..." Laguna answered, matter of factly, "I felt like there was another presence here with us..."

"I think it's just a symptom of your underlying madness...."  Kiros said, with a wily smile.

"Genius.." Laguna corrected.

Kiros shook his head, chuckling, "Drink up...the show's about to start."

The curtains lifted, revealing a delicate looking young lady dressed in red, sitting at a black grand piano. The lights in the cafe dimmed and she began to play a soft and sweet tune. She played....her deep brown eyes scanning the crowd, and locking onto Laguna's. Was she playing just for him? It seemed like it....He felt his heart melting...she was so beautiful and her music touched his very soul. If only there was a way to express that music in words....it was so exquisite, yet so sad....hope mixed with tragedy...joy coupled with pain.....As if it described two lovers intertwined in a dance, soon to be parted and yet hoping was a chance that they'd be together again....he could almost see them, gliding across the floor...knowing all the time that they may never see each other again and yet they keep dancing.....Laguna let the music penetrate him, losing himself in its sweet melody. 

 Shortly, the concert came to an end and Julia took her bows, stealing glances at the handsome young soldier she spotted in one of the booths. She decided then and there to send a messenger to the young man and have him come to her room. There was something quite extraordinary about him, the way he watched her as she played...as if he was totally surrounded by the music. Minutes passed and finally there was a knock at her hotel room door. She opened it with trepidation, hoping that the soldier hadn't refused. Looking out into the corridor, there he stood....he was quite tall, his eyes a light ocean blue that glinted with some unknown mischief and long dark brown hair. He smiled as she opened the door wider, it was a disarming smile...and she fell for it, head over heels. 

"Umm...h-hi..." He said, fidgeting nervously, "I'm...uh...Laguna L-Loire, you asked for me?"

"Yes, I saw you watching me tonight...Did you enjoy yourself?" She asked, her voice sweet as a summer breeze dancing through wind chimes. 

"Yeah...I really love your music....Um...may I come in? The bus boy is lookin' at me funny.." He replied, smiling again.

"Oh! Yes...Please" She said, blushing a little as she opened the door, "Please, sit over here." Motioning to a small table set up near the window in her room.

"Thanks...What was that song you played first called? I haven't heard that one before...." he asked, sitting down across from her, his blue eyes twinkling in the half light.

"It's titled Eyes on Me....I was considering writing some words for it. I'd really like to start singing more...I'm afraid I'm terrible at writing lyrics though." She blushed again, shyly pushing a lock of hair behind her ear, " I suppose it's a little silly for a pianist to want to sing, especially since I've sort of built a following doing instrumentals." She couldn't help but fall for him...the sparkle of his eyes, the way his mouth pulled up funny on one side when he smiled...She knew he had been watching her, she wondered if he knew that she was doing the same. 

"No....I don't think it's silly...You should pursue your dreams, no matter what they are. If you don't do it now, you'll regret it tomorrow...that's my philosophy." 

"Really?" she smiled and put her hand on top of his, "What's your dream?"

Laguna's eyes softened and looking down, he answered, "I'd like to become a journalist....travel the world writing about everything I see. You know, like go to a city and sample the food, the traditions...that kind of thing."

"Why'd you sign up for the army then?" 

"I needed some money and a way to leave my hometown, Timber....this was the easiest way....I haven't given up though....Neither should you....You know, you should write some words for that song...I'll help you if you want.." 

"Yes, I'd like that very much...."

Laguna and Julia stayed like this, locked in a moment of eternal devotion....staring into each others eyes, as if there was nothing else in the world to look at. Leaning in, they kissed softly......The world dissolving from view into pale shades the color of the rainbow....Time rippling out and folding in on itself....a never ending dance, like the lovers of his vision. A young man with cold eyes and a young woman with a warm heart, forever intertwined in this dance, color and emotion tied together as one...their twin souls....separated for so long but always together.....a paradox.  The scene fading from view, disappearing into a well of darkness.....

Squall woke up on the floor of the small cabin, his eyes adjusting slowly. He lifted himself off the floor, still groggy and finding it hard to move his own limbs. _What the hell just happened_...._what a weird ass dream_....he thought dully, looking over at Zell and Selphie, who were also just waking up. Squall shook the stiffness out of his limbs, stretching and cracking his neck to limber himself up. He looked down at his watch, only ten minutes had passed....very weird. Looking around, nothing in the room seemed out of order...._So why would someone gas us and not take anything or attack us_..._or something_.._? _Squall thought, becoming more and more disturbed by the whole incident.

Zell rubbed his eyes vigorously and sleepily said, "Boy, what the hell was that about....I had the strangest dream too....It was like, I was this other person but not really...I could like hear him talking but I couldn't do anything...it was real goofy.."

"Lucky you....I dreamt I was a moron..." Squall yawned_. What the hell was wrong with that Laguna guy anyway, what an ass._

"That's weird, I had a dream too....and there was this super hot guy in it! Gosh, what was his name...ummm...Laguna!" Selphie exclaimed, glancing up to see the looks of shock and disbelief on her companion's faces, "What?"

 "It's just that was the name of the person in my dream..."

"And mine." Zell piped up, shaking himself a little, "Gawd, that's creepy...What'd you think it means?"`

Squall shrugged, he didn't know what to make of it, " No telling, ultimately we can't explain it.... I think it'd be best if we just forget about it for now, we can bring it up later with the headmaster. Let's just concentrate on the mission for now."

"I guess you're right.....it still creeps me out" Zell replied, making a face. 

They went back to what they'd been doing before passing out....Squall hadn't heeded his own advice, he couldn't get the dream out of his head...As of late, he seemed to be having an awful lot of unexplainable dreams. What did it mean? It was strange, but he wondered if that last dream was a dream at all...Zell had explained it well, it was like he was Laguna and yet not Laguna....he could hear and see...but couldn't control or visibly affect the world. And for a moment, he could've sworn that Laguna had heard him somehow..._This is crazy_...he thought, watching Zell and Selphie play a game of triple triad. Selphie was winning, much to Zell's dismay. He watched, losing himself in thought as the train bounded forward, towards Timber and away from Balamb.


	7. Forest Owls

The dream was always the same...she was back at Balamb Garden, looking for Watts and Zone at the Graduation Party for new SeeDs...then she spotted him, a young man about her age with intense eyes, watching her from across the room. If it'd been any other guy, she would've beaten the crap out of him, but he was different....His face so serene....serious....and when he saw that she'd noticed him,  the shy look of shock flickering across his eyes....his eyes....a lovely shade of pale blue, almost like ice...When he looked at her, it was like he was looking right through her....to see all the things she'd kept hidden from everyone else...like he knew her without having met her before...

If she'd known him a little better, it would've humored her how alike they were....he was a loner, with few friends, keeping so much of himself secret...shutting out the world....Rinoa was the same, and yet in a different manner....sure she had a lot of friends, but none of them really understood her...they called her the Princess...so she acted the part...hiding behind a mask of bossy, yet fetching beauty....Both of them hiding from who they really were. He changed all that for her....She didn't want to hide anymore...The young SeeD she'd danced with....he saw her for who she really was, not who she pretended to be......She didn't want to be alone anymore, didn't want the feelings he inspired to end. A voice from deep inside told her it was right...he was the one person she could share herself with.......as if their souls had searched for an eternity to finally find each other again...._Please, let me see him_...._if only for a moment_....

Her sleeping mind went over that night's events, again and again, replaying every moment....Two and a half weeks had passed and every detail was engraved on her memory. Especially his face, that she tried her hardest not to forget, memorizing it like she would the lines of her favorite book. His face was a puzzle, a strange poem that she struggled to pull meaning from. But for all its beauty, the thing she most remembered was the dark scar that traveled across his forehead...._what a mystery, I wonder how he got it_??  She could remember how his hand felt in hers...the sound of his soft voice, so deep....soothing....gentle..........she wished she'd been brave enough to kiss him, a bold and dramatic move, even for her.....Her heart ached with longing every minute that went by since that moment...._I don't even know his name_...._how could I be so stupid_......

In her dream, the ending was never bittersweet, filled with regret and sadness....Zone didn't call her away to meet with Cid...she didn't have to watch as his face struggled with emotion, his heart breaking as hers....closing a door they'd opened together....No painful good-byes....no broken hearts....no nights of crying silently, burying your face in your pillow to mask the sobs....the more rational part of her mind chided, breaking into a perfectly good dream with cold reality, _Grab a hold of the reigns Rinoa, you just met the guy and probably will never see him again_....._Okay, yeah, I'm being overly-dramatic there but still_...._it'd be nice to have some adventure in my life. A little passion, a bit of heart breaking romance_...._anything_ _but_..._my life_... The large crush she had developed on the mysterious SeeD that she'd met at the dance had become a full on obsession. A wonderful fantasy that drew her away from the monotony of her own life. 

Anything was better to her than what her life had become, _anything_. She remembered a time when her life had been more exciting and not just drudgery. It seemed like so long ago. When she first formed the Forest Owls, it seemed like such a bold move. Like somehow, she could make a difference, be like one of those people in the war movies. It was a little glamorization, but she really believed that somehow if she tried, she could change the world. What she didn't take into account, was that the world could not be changed in a day, and her small effort alone could not change all that much. The gritty, rather boring reality had soon hit her hard in the face. The day to day decisions, her basic inability to get anyone to do what she asked, she hadn't expected and the stress of essentially holding up the world by herself was too much. So she indulged her imagination, letting her little dream about the handsome SeeD take her away from all her problems. She had imagined the next moment again and again, relishing the anticipation of it. Oddly, it never seemed to get any farther than that, not that it mattered much... She imagined giving him a _real_ kiss....

She raised her hand to trace the curve of his chin, drawing her fingers up and caressing his face gently....touching his light brown hair with her finger tips....looking deeply into his eyes and losing herself in them....his hand gliding up her bare shoulder to touch her face....and...s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-haking.....her...???? That wasn't in her dream dammit.....

"Wake UP!" said a voice, soft but firm.

"Mmmmnnnnmmm dooan wann too...gooo way....nnnmmffff..." she mumbled, still groggy and more than just a little peeved.

"Please, will you wake up..." the voice pleaded, continuing to shake her.

"mmmmNoooOOOoooooo!!" she whined, slapping at the hand on her shoulder.

"Wake up or I'll drag you out...." the voice repeated, trying the tough approach and it sounded like the person behind it just might make good on the threat. 

"OKAY!...nnmmmgawd...juscht wanna get saam sluuueeeep..." 

Several minutes later, Rinoa forced herself awake, her eyes still bleary and muddled with sleep. If it was Zone or Watts, so help her she'd cold cock 'em. She rubbed her tired eyes, clearing her vision. Looking over to see who woke her from a perfectly good dream her initial anger dissipated....it wasn't Zone, Watts, or anyone else she knew. It was a young man, he had his back turned to her and was dressed almost head to toe in black. _What in the_.._?_ she thought, ..........._OMIGOSH!! SeeD must be finally here_!!  Only a moment ago she was near comatose, but now she was fully awake and alive. Giddily, she pondered whether or not he'd know the young SeeD she'd danced with at that graduation party. It was funny that Cid didn't seem to know. _You'd think that someone with a scar slashed across his forehead would be someone you'd remember_....she mused...._I suppose I could ask this guy_...

With that in mind, she coughed lightly and said, "Um....excuse me....I wonder if you might know someone...who..." 

Hearing her voice, the man in black turned around to face her. Her words caught in her throat...Rinoa's jaw dropped....It _WAS_ the SeeD she'd danced with! Absolute joy overtook her and before he could even react, she launched herself off her bed. Rinoa leapt into his arms, hugging him as tightly as she could. 

Her arms draped around his neck, she exclaimed, "IT'S YOU! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!! I THOUGHT I'D NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN!!"  

Quickly she released him, wanting to really take a look at him...to make sure he was really there and not just a dream. _He's here_...._he's really here_....Her heart leapt with happiness, finally things would get done. She'd make a difference, and maybe even find love at the same time. _Way to be shallow Rinoa_....she thought to herself, but she couldn't help indulging her girlish giddiness for one moment. Apparently, he was just as surprised to see her, his face immobile with shock... His pale blue eyes as wide as saucers, mouth agape in a wide O of  alarm.

"Yuh-Yuh-Y-y-you....." he stammered, his voice breathy and low. 

His entire face flushed bright red, a trembling finger raising to point at her. Rinoa suddenly became aware that she was still dressed in nothing but the tank top and shortie P.J. bottoms she'd put on the night before. She could feel herself blushing, the color spreading to fill every part of her body. 

"Oh! I....um...uh...I'll go change...", tripping over herself on her way to the bathroom. 

Reappearing moments later to grab some clothes, she smiled sheepishly and dashed back into the bathroom to change. The door slammed and Squall was alone, still shaking...._Good God_...He'd comforted himself so many times after that night with the idea that he'd see her again. Now here she was and again he found himself loosing control again. Squall breathed in deeply, calming his rattled nerves.....he could handle this, no big deal....._So this  girl I fell_..._I had a silly crush on with shows up again_..._that was then, this is now._ _Get a hold of yourself_... He regained some composure and sat on the bed to wait for her. 

They'd been in Timber for all of an hour, having arrived at the train station around noon. The ride over had gone smoothly, besides the weird shared dream the day before and Zell and Selphie arguing back and forth while playing cards the ENTIRE night....other than that, it had been a pleasant trip_. Like a trip to hell, without the beautiful vistas_...When they arrived the expected resistance member was there, the code was given and they were driven to the _super ultra secret hide-out_ of the Forest Owls. Their guide was a guy named Zone, funny name considering he probably did just that on more than one occasion. Zone introduced them to the rest of their motley crew....Another member, named Watts, asked Squall to go and wake the princess....When Squall had asked what he meant by waking the princess....

Zone had answered, "Well....uh.....our...uuuuuhh...leader, we like call her the princess and stuff...Noni's kinda, sorta hard to wake up and junk and like she sorta kinda is really like grumpy and all scary and stuff and we like all figgerd you bein' a SeeD n' all you could like uhhhhhhh wake her up and stuff...."

Squall had reluctantly agreed to do so, getting directions to the princess's abode he strode on in. Not knowing that he'd be greeted by the ghost of depressions past. How'd he get into a situation like this......Zell had been right when he said that the first mission sucked...._NO SHIT it sucked, damned understatement of the year_....he thought glumly, impatiently tapping his boot on the floor....._God! What's taking her so long_!! A wet nose nudged his hand lightly....._a dog??_ A brown and white sheltie sat at his side, looking at him with gooey dog eyes that begged Squall to pet him. Having nothing better to do, he pet the dog, noting the golden name tag attached to a red collar around its neck.

 "Angelo...hmmmm, didn't see you when I came in....hiding under the bed, eh?" Squall said, while scratching behind the dogs ear. The door opened and she stepped out, the dog immediately leaving his side for hers.

"Hey Giji! HOW"S MY ANGELO! How's my boy!?", ruffling the dog's fur as it jumped up to meet her. She stopped and looked at Squall, smiling she whispered,  "Hi...."

"h-h-huh-Hi...." 

"Sorry about before....Um...Well, we've never been properly introduced....My name's Rinoa Heartilly." , she stuck out her hand for him to shake. 

"Squall Leonhart...." he said softly, lowering his eyes. Stepping forward, he took her hand gently, his heart pounding, and shook it. 

"Nice to meet you, Squall.....Shall we go?"

He nodded, praying that this stupid mission would be over and he could go home. Home, where things were normal and he didn't feel like every minute his heart would give out. Where he could fricking breathe without his chest tightening with every breath. Just when things had fallen into place and the world made sense again, the fates seemed to mock him at every turn. _Just get it over with_.....he hissed inwardly. Being a gentleman, he stepped back, letting her exit the small cabin first. She walked forward, smiling as she went....it was when her back was turned to him that he noticed the pattern on the back of her sleeveless blue duster. His face drained of color as he walked behind her like a zombie, barely able to keep himself moving. A pair of stylized wings, _white_ angel wings on her back ....._god, it was the dream again_....It was her that he saw in his dream. What did it mean, if anything? _It means that I'm seriously fucked up in the head_..._that's what it means_...This thought played with him as he entered the small meeting room in the Forest Owls base. He shook himself, breathing in deeply again to regain some semblance of normalcy and composure. 

Rinoa stood up at the head of the table, propping her hands on it. There was little room on the table itself, as it was covered by an enormous model train set. At the moment Rinoa was conversing with another member of the resistance, turning her attention away from the task at hand.  He could see Zell and Selphie sitting near the head of the table. Zell had saved him a seat and as he sat down, Squall noted the surprised look on Zell's face. _Gee, that was me a minute ago_... 

"DUDE! It's her! You know, that chick you danced with..." Zell whispered.

"So it is....your point being?" Squall hissed back.

Zell's eyes opened wide, waggling his eyebrows goofily,  "SO!? Aren't you gonna...you know...work your magic on her? At least ask her out or something!"

 "Oh, whatever...."

"I think you're crazy if you don't...."

"They're about to start...." Squall replied quickly, completely annoyed.

The lights dimmed a bit and Rinoa began, "For those who don't know, a few weeks ago we received some information that Vinzer Deling would be traveling via train through Timber. Our plan, at its basic level, is a kidnapping operation. We've managed to get our hands on an almost exact replica of one of the two escort cars traveling with the car carrying Deling. We're going to switch our dummy car for one of the escort cars... hence, kidnapping Deling and hopefully forcing some negotiations...either that or we go to jail!....just kidding. I've constructed this model to help everyone understand how it should go. Being that we are rather short handed, we've managed to secure some help from Balamb Garden....could you three please introduce yourselves..."

The next few moments were spent on introductions, formal titles were given and there were handshakes all around. After everyone got a small chance to get to know each other, they all sat down to officially begin the meeting. As Rinoa began, the other Forest Owls regarded the three SeeDs, unsure of how to take their presence. On one hand, having the extra help would be good, especially since they were professionals. On the other hand, how could you trust them? It's not like they really shared the same goals, they were only doing it for the money and could care less about Timbers independence.

Rinoa pointed down to the small model mock up, briefly explaining what they were to do once they met up with Deling's train. She finished up and asked the room if they had any questions. Zone raised his hand and Rinoa nodded at him. "Yes, you've got a question?"

"Yeah, the paint job on the model sucks..." 

Rinoa scowled at Zone, "Oh shut up....It was really late when I painted it...AND that's not even a question."

"That's no excuse!! Looks like a two year old painted it.."

"OOOOkay.....It symbolizes my hatred for Vinzer Deling and his unjust government... So shut up about it already...."

"WOW!" Selphie exclaimed, innocently, "You must really hate him!"

Exasperated, Rinoa shot back, "Alright already! Enough about the stupid paint job, like it matters anyway....any REAL questions?"

"Yes, Who's going the sneak aboard the train?" Squall asked.

"THANK YOU...at least someone here is an adult. I will, seeing as this is my plan.... In any event, we will need at least three other people to help out. Two look-outs and the person who'll be repelling off the train" Rinoa said with an uncertain smile, "Any volunteers?" Looking at the dead silent room, Rinoa knew none of the rest would ask to go along, unless she made them. Their lack of enthusiasm aggravated her often and it seemed to her sometimes they only cared about independence in theory not practice. _They wanted Deling out of Timber, but not enough to actually work at it._ _They act like I'm a bossy bitch and yet I manage to get things done_.

Squall solved her problem immediately and stood up, "I'll go..."

"WELL...there's one...." Rinoa said, looking around again. _God, I don't know why I even try sometimes._

"Me and Selphie will go too....I mean, you hired us and all...so we can do the dirty work no one else wants to, right?" Zell said, smiling pleasantly...knowing full well that Selphie would hit him once she got the chance. He could see it in her eyes. 

"Thank you...all three of you...Well, I guess we have our train party. The rest of you will have to stay here and make preparations." Rinoa said, gritting her teeth. _Figures the only people to volunteer would be those we've paid for._ She wondered if she could go back in time and tell herself not to start this stupid group, "We'll rendezvous with the President's train in a half hour. So let's get moving."  

The meeting then came to a noisy and unproductive end. Squall was wondering what in the world possessed Cid to assign them to this mission. He remembered what Cid had told them, that this mission was about building character...._Damn tests_...._Hey Squall, being miserable builds character, YEEHAW!!  Gee thanks dad_...He sulked darkly. Zell tapped his shoulder, motioning for him to lean over. 

"What do you think about all this?" 

"........It doesn't matter what I think. We just have to follow orders."

Zell frowned, "Still, don't you think they're....well..... kinda disorganized. More than just that, NONE of their members volunteered for this mission.....besides Rinoa I mean. It's almost an insult to work for these people. They don't seem to even want to work on this mission at all."

"Yeah," Selphie whispered, " And did you see the way they looked at us when Rinoa introduced us? It's like they don't even want us here. Maybe you should check our contract, Squall. If they can't use us, maybe someone else can."

" I suppose you're both right....I'll check our contract, but we should at least to attempt to fulfill our half of the agreement." Squall replied, a bit too sternly. He was momentarily horrified to realize that he sounded like Quistis. 

He walked over to where Rinoa had been since the end of the meeting, _if_ you could call it a meeting. She was squatting on the floor with Watts, going over the schematics for the President's train, making annotations and addendums to it regarding the security. 

"Isn't it odd that there seems to be such lax security?" Rinoa asked, her brow furrowing.

"Yeah, but my info came from a reliable source, are you thinking it's a set up?" Watts said, answering her question with one of his own.

"Could be, but I suppose this is the best chance we've got. Even if it is some kind of trap or double cross, it's all we have. Contact your source at Timber Maniacs magazine, at the very least whether we succeed or fail we can make some news." She replied, brightening at the thought of some press for the resistance. 

"Ahem..."  Squall coughed, "Sorry to interrupt.....May I please take a look at your contract with the Garden?"

Rinoa's eyes narrowed. Why would they need to review their contract? Dollars to donuts they were going to see if they could back out. Cid told her this might happen, so he fixed it for her, to make sure that no one could try and quit. She replied slowly, "Sure, but Cid had to give me two contracts. One has all the lawyer mumbo-jumbo in it that only they can understand. He gave me another one that was much simpler."

She handed him the two contracts, one a mere slip of paper, the other a large clutch of documents. Quickly scanning through both documents, his heart sank into a seemingly bottomless, snake filled pit. The language was extremely vague, it stated that they were to help out Rinoa and the Owls in their efforts to liberate Timber for as long as it takes. The one and only way the contract would terminate was when Timber was recognized as a free country. _Which could be today, tomorrow, or twenty years from now! Yeah_..._we're your best students so send us on a freaking mission that very well may NEVER end_...._God DAMMIT all to hell_....he ruminated angrily. Why in the world would Cid do this? That was the one thing that boggled Squall's mind. _It's because the gods DO hate me and mock my very existence_..._I knew I should've refused this stupid mission_.... _dammit_...Resigning himself, he realized that they had to abide by the contract. The stupid thing left no maneuvering room for them to squirm out of their obligation. 

"Thank you..." He said quietly, handing her paper back and skulking back to Zell and Selphie.  

"Well, what'd say?" Zell inquired, anxiously.

"It's really vague....." Squall replied, rubbing his temple in frustration, "I read BOTH documents that Cid gave to her....and they say pretty much the same thing. We're stuck helping these people until Timber is freed...."

"You've got to be joking! Timber might NEVER be freed! God dammit! So, we're fucking screwed.....is that it?" Zell snarled, crossing his arms in contempt, he shot a look over at Selphie, "Told you our first mission would suck.."

"Oh, don't rub it in.....and this is for volunteering me..." she snapped, hitting him on the arm, "So....what do we do now?"

"We follow our orders.....that's what. Anything they ask of us, we do...without complaint." Squall answered, turning his back on them and walking over to join Rinoa.

She finished up with Watts and turned around to look at Squall, his eyes had turned cold....not at all like they were when she first met him. Something had changed between them, and it hurt her deep down to see it. "Can I help you?"

"Yes....what are your orders?", his voice flat and colorless. 

"My orders? Well....I'm sorry....  I'm just used to people picking up the slack without having to be told....um....We don't really give too many orders around here....I'm not really sure what you want me to do......"

"We're all going on the train, right? What jobs do you want to assign us to?" He asked again, losing patience a little. _We're just hired hands_....._not like we have any choice in the matter_...._why even pretend_, he thought bitterly. 

"Gee....I don't know....Why don't you pick which jobs do you want to do?"

"It doesn't work that way, you tell us what to do.....That contract with the Garden in effect makes you our commander. We have to follow your orders completely and to the letter. What we want is irrelevant." 

"Oh.... So...I tell you to jump and you say how high....is that how it works?  Well...You look like the strongest here, I guess you can be the one to jump off the moving train...and Selphie and Zell can be the look outs. Happy now?" He didn't answer, continuing to stare at her with those cold, indifferent eyes. _Is this what he's really like?_  He'd been quiet and a bit sullen when she first met him, but now....he was being a total flaming asshole,  "I assume that means yes....or doesn't it matter?" she said, an edge of sarcasm entering her voice, "Fine then.....We leave NOW.  Let's go...Watts has our radios and the repelling equipment. We'll use the radios sparingly, don't want to tip anyone off."

The four of them left the meeting room, and into the small entryway where Watts was waiting. The SeeDs took their equipment, a couple of radio headsets and Squall's climbing gear. Rinoa silently began to pick up her equipment, irritated by the holier than thou attitude all three SeeDs had been exhibiting. Just because they had some musty old professor babble on about tactics didn't make them military geniuses. _Check the damn contract my ass_...._You can take the thing and shove it_...she thought, seriously beginning to wonder if this was such a great idea. The door to their train opened, the wind whipping her hair around so violently that it got in her eyes. She quickly tied it back and took off her long, blue duster, handing it to Watts. 

Rinoa grabbed onto the small handles near the open door, easily lifting herself on to the rungs. Shimmying up the ladder and onto the roof of the train, she looked forward, past the nose of the engine....in the distance, not too far away, she could see the President's train. _Who cares if they're a bunch of jerks_...._if they can help us, I guess I can put up with them_....The SeeDs followed close behind, Squall coming first then the two others. She motioned him through, then Zell came, and finally Selphie, who almost fell off the stupid ladder. Rinoa caught her arm quickly, and helped her up on the train. _Looking like a pretty big IF_....she mused. The Forest Owls train sped towards the President's at light speed. At least that's how it seemed to Rinoa, who momentarily reveled in the sensation. She made it up to the front of the train, pushing in front of Squall. Soon the last car on the President's train lined up with theirs.....Taking a moment to prepare herself,  she knelt down and pushed off the top of the train with all her strength. Leaping gracefully into the air, she landed on the President's train with little trouble. She backed up a bit, turning around to motion for the SeeDs to follow. __

Once everyone was onboard, they quickly made their way up past the last two cars towards the Presidential car. The Forest Owl's train sped up, passing the Presidential train. Rinoa watched as it went, trying to keep her balance as the wind lashed her small form. The wind was their enemy, wickedly lashing and whipping at them with unseen fingers. They had to hunker down low, to reduce the wind's resistance, so they wouldn't be thrown from the train. After a few moments, they made it past the Presidential car and then to the first escort car. 

Rinoa clicked on her radio, "Selphie and Zell, position yourselves at the far end of the train. Look down....you can see through the low windows...keep an eye out for guards on that side....there should be at least two...call if anyone comes so we can get Squall up before they see him." She clicked it off and began to position an automated winch above the door and the locking mechanism. Attaching the slim cord that would be hoisting Squall up and down. She looked up and motioned for him to come over. Rinoa handed him the business end of the cord, and he clipped himself in. The other two watched the windows for a sign of the guards. 

Flipping on the radio again, she spoke quickly,  "Jerk the cord when you want to get up...the lock's a bit sticky....so you might have to yank a little, instructions are on the side......good luck."

Squall nodded and readied himself, putting on a pair of gloves, so his hands wouldn't be shredded by the sharp metal wire. Steadying himself and testing the strength of the cord quickly, he carefully walked down the side of the car. His hands were sweating inside his gloves, as he lowered himself so slowly it hardly seemed like he was moving at all.  It was difficult going, the train traveling so fast that the wind constantly threatened to unbalance him and send him flying off the side of the train. Squall could hear the click of the metal wheels on the track. One good gust and that was all she wrote. He reached the switch, grabbing the small handle with one hand and holding the wire with the other, he pulled....stupid thing wouldn't budge. Rinoa had been right, the switch was quite heavy, and gave more resistance that Squall had expected. He yanked the switch again, this time pulling it almost all the way out. Squall stopped for a moment and repositioned himself , jerking it suddenly, he forced the switch out all the way. Turning it over, he could hear a barely audible click, with that he shoved it back into place. Looking up, he yanked the cord to let Rinoa know it was time for him to go up. The wire went taught as the winch slowly wound up the cord and Squall made his way back up. Moments later, he was on top of the train with Rinoa again. She waived them all on and they ran down the length of the train, stopping on the Presidential car. 

The Presidential car detached from the first escort car and began to slow down. Once they reached an intersection in the rails, ahead of the slowing Presidential car, the tracks underneath their train quickly switched. Now traveling on the same tracks, the Forest Owls train began to carefully back up to reach Deling's car. They allowed their hitch to bump into the Presidential car's hitch and quickly engaged the locking mechanism. There was a small jolt, as the cars latches locked  and then the train smoothly began to move forward. Rinoa and the others snuck down the remaining length of the Presidential car, stopping at the end of it. 

_Everything went like planned  AND there were no guards. It was  a little weird but, anything you can walk away from was good,_ Rinoa thought. Making a snap decision, she flipped her radio on, "Zell, Selphie...I think they could put you two to better use in the control room, go back inside the train and help them out....Squall and I will be okay.."

"You sure?" Zell's asked, his voice crackling over the head set. 

"Yup..."She answered, clicking off her headset and moving down to the end of the Presidential car. 

Zell and Selphie winded their way back over the Presidential car and towards the Forest Owls train. Rinoa stopped to watch them go, making sure they made it back on the train. Then she repositioned the winch, replaying the same steps they'd taken on the first escort. Wasting no time, Squall began his descent, and he was halfway down the side of the train when the radio crackled to life.

"Squall...I'm pulling you up...get ready!"

Before he could ask why, the winch began its work and he had hardly any choice but to follow. He looked to his left, through the windows he could see a guard turning the corner...._SHIT!_ ...Scrambling up the side, Squall barely made it to the roof of the train before the soldier walked far enough down the hallway to see him from the low windows. The guard peered out a small observation window set into the door. Rinoa and Squall waited for a moment, with baited breath, while the wind whistled in their ears. Seeing nothing unusual, the guard left, satisfied that all was well. Looking at each other, their faces pale and shaken, both relieved that they hadn't been caught. Rinoa made the okay gesture, her eyes questioning him. He nodded and taking up the wire, walked down the side again. This time he hurried through the steps, and disengaged the lock as quickly as possible. Jerking the wire, he ascended with all speed. They ran the length of the car and jumped back onto the roof of the Owls train. The second escort car was now uncoupled, without anything to give it forward momentum, it slowed radically. The Forest Owls train leaving it in the dust, riding off to a secluded and long forgotten set of tracks. Once they were in protected territory and the train was stopped, they'd begin the negotiations. 

When Squall and Rinoa made it back into the train, they went directly to the small control room. Zone, with loads of assistance from Selphie, had managed to hack into the computer system that secured the locks on the doors to the president's car. The rest of the Forest Owls had suited up, arming themselves with whatever weapons they'd been able to get their hands on. They had assumed that there would be a ton of security on the car itself. Rinoa strapped on her blaster edge, a compact weapon that was much like a crossbow combined with a boomerang. The Forest Owls walked over to the entrance to the Presidents car. Squall stopped Rinoa before she could join the rest of her crew.

"What should we do?" he asked, managing not to make eye contact with her.

"Just follow us.... You brought weapons, I hope?" 

Zell suddenly popped up, handing Squall a large black case of some kind. He knelt down and opened it, taking out the weirdest weapon Rinoa had ever seen. It looked like a big hand gun with a sword blade attached. On the shimmering sliver blade there was an engraving of a lion, breathing fire. 

She stared at the weapon, fascination overtaking her, she said dreamily, "Wow....what is it?"

"A gunblade...." 

"Wait....yeah....Now I remember....I first heard of you guys last summer, when I met another cadet at a party at my father's....his name was Seifer, he said he used a gunblade....kept bragging about how he and one other student were the only ones that used them... He must've been talking about you.......boy, I haven't thought about him in ages."

At Seifer's name Squall visibly stiffed, his eyes hardening again, "Whatever....shouldn't we go?"

"Yeah...I guess...." Rinoa said, lost in thought. 

Seifer had been one of the first guys she'd ever dated. She wasted an entire summer on him. In truth, she wasn't sure if she was angry with Seifer or herself for being so naive and gullible. Seifer was handsome, in a macho kind of way, not her usual pick for a boyfriend. It was his confidence that impressed her, that and his passion for life. The way he talked about everything, adding a stimulating edge of excitement and romance. It had been fun hanging out with him at first, but after awhile his personality grated on her nerves. Seifer was an arrogant child with a HUGE attitude problem. They argued constantly, everything they liked about each other became everything they hated. It became obvious to both of them that they were different people...too different to get along with each other. She had really loved him and thought that he had felt the same, but she was wrong.  He wanted a romantic relationship without the attachments, she wanted more. The end came rather anticlimactically, no shouting....no argument....He simply left and she never saw him again. No note, no warning, she got up one morning, went to his hotel room and he wasn't there. It had been more devastating to her than anything else he could have done.  No chance for her to say good-bye, no way for a small reconciliation, not even a promise that they'd still be friends. He just left, leaving her alone to deal with her feelings, much like her father had done many years before. Seifer knew about her father leaving shortly after her mother died, knew that his leaving had made her feel painfully alone and worthless. She was terrified of being abandoned, and he used it, purposefully leaving without explanation to hurt her. _He was such an ass_...._should've known that the people he'd gone to school with would be the same. _

They joined the Forest Owls who'd gathered around the closed door to the President's cabin. With a signal, Zone pushed a button and the door to the cabin opened. Rinoa and three other Forest Owls members rushed in, weapons at the ready. One lone guard scrambled up, raising his weapon nervously. _ONE GUARD_? Rinoa was surprised and disturbed. The president wasn't here....it had been a ruse. 

"HALT!" he shouted, shaking like a leaf.

Rinoa cocked her head, and with a derisive look, cracked off a shot with her blaster edge. It grazed the guard's helmet, hard enough to knock him unconscious. She stepped over him, looking up she could see the president. He was sitting with his back turned at a small table. _It couldn't be him_....._It had been too easy_...._if the president was really here there'd be more guards._ She knew it had been too good to be true. _Dammit!_ _Probably hired some poor community actor to pretend like he was the President_. She was angry, not just at the dumb bastard who had to play President, but at herself for not being more careful. Rinoa wanted answers....if the President wasn't here where the hell was he? She'd be damned if she didn't find it out, this asshole was going to talk, like it or not. 

"Who are you?", aiming her weapon at the back of the fake president's head. He didn't answer right away, "ANSWER ME! Where's the President?"

"Right HeRe..." the fake President answered, it's voice gurgling unnaturally,  "YouNG  LADY....You'Re...AlL goinG TO Die!!" 

The president lurched up from his seat. It wasn't the President or even someone posing as the President, it wasn't even human. Its face was a contorted mess of flesh and bone, its features oozing into each other. Rinoa stared at it in frozen horror, while the other members of the Forest Owls backed up, dropping their weapons and running back into the car. She couldn't move, she'd never seen a real monster before. It lumbered towards her, with every step loosing the features that distinguished it as human. 

The thing began to transform in front of her, one of its arms shaking and bubbling as the flesh remolded itself. Its guts spilling out from its torso, claws bursting out of its skin where fingers had once been. The stench of death filling the small cabin. She dropped to her knees, not knowing what else to do, her mind paralyzed with fear. _What the hell?_.....Lifting its arms out, it reached down to grab her, but before it could,  a sudden burst of fire drove it stumbling back. Rinoa's paralysis broke and she looked back to see who'd saved her. It couldn't have been one of her people, para-magic was hard to get a hold of. Most civilians could never get their hands on the stuff, she knew...they'd tried, it was only used by the military and....SeeD. Her heart thumped, her eyes went wide....it was Squall, standing at the door with his hand outstretched. The thing made a run at him, screaming with inhuman rage.  He sidestepped it, stretching his hand out again. With little effort a gout of flame gathered in his palm and shot out towards the charging monster. The zombie shuddered with pain, turning again to charge his attacker. Squall didn't have enough time to react, he stumbled as the monster lurched towards him.....from her place on the floor, Rinoa quickly fired the pinwheel from her blaster edge. Hitting the thing in its side, distracting the monster long enough for Squall to get up. It whipped around, attacked from all sides, it became confused and rushed towards Rinoa. She rapidly reloaded, firing shot after shot, the thing rattling and shaking with each hit. It roared in pain and raising its arm, it swiped at Rinoa. She screamed, realizing her weapon wasn't working, and covered her head. Squall jumped in front of her, slashing the monster's belly with his gunblade. From behind, another huge blast of fire engulfed the zombie. It was Zell and Selphie, who'd combined their efforts and began to buffet the thing with blast after blast of fire. 

"You alright?" Squall asked, holding out his hand.

She took it, letting him help her up, "Y-yes....Thanks.."

"We'll take care of this....you better get out of here..."

"No....I...." she stammered, watching the continuing battle rage over the entire room. 

The creature whipped out a tentacle, striking Selphie hard on her arm, leaving a sickly looking welt on her skin. She staggered and fell to the ground, the toxins in the monster's skin had quickly begun to worm their way through her system. Zell noticed this and momentarily halted his attack to cast Esuna on her to flush the poison out. This gave the monster a chance to strike out at him, but he shortly returned his attention to where it belonged. He wasn't quite fast enough, the creature took this chance and struck again. This second attack was deflected by a quick slash from Squall's gunblade, slicing a tentacle in half before it could reach his teammate. Zell continued to cast spells and Squall kept the thing from landing any more blows, his sword flashing and arcing gracefully as he hit blow after blow. Watching the spinning blade was dizzying, each swing was deliberate and precise, and his knack from anticipating his enemies next move was uncanny. Even stranger was the way he worked out an easy rhythm to support his teammate, his movements and actions coordinating with whatever Zell was doing. After a moment or two to recover herself, Selphie cast a quick cure spell on herself and jumped up to help Zell. She raised her hand up in a dance like motion, and without blinking, a jet of fire appeared from her palm. It spread outwards, joining Zell's own flame as it hit the target. This motion was repeated, the individual pulses of flame register as one larger, constant stream of fire. Rinoa watched the battle with awe, they were good, much better than her, much better than anyone she had ever seen, though she knew it was due to their professional training. How could she compare, she fought because she had to, not because she chose to. She had experience, a lot of experience and yet she couldn't help but feel so useless...what could she do? She didn't have magic, and her weapon was ineffective against the thing. She knew she should leave but, it seemed too much like giving up to just go. This was HER operation, as leader it would be not only wrong but irresponsible to leave.

She was resolved, pulling herself up off the ground, "NO....I got myself into this...I'm not about to give up just because the odds aren't stacked in my favor." 

"Rinoa...." Squall said, trying to reason with her. Before he could go on, she rushed forward, towards Zell and Selphie. 

The monster staggered around the room, its body smoking from all the blasts of fire it'd endured. It would only take a few more hits before the thing would go down. In a last ditch effort, the monster raised a meaty arm, letting tendrils of undead flesh whip towards its merciless attackers. In a flash, Rinoa lifted her left arm and shot at the decrepit skin whips, slicing them in half. This gave Zell enough time to rip off one last lick of flame, casting the highest level fire spell that one could learn, firaga. He raised his hands and pushed forward with all his will, sending an impressive blast of fire that broke over the zombie like a wave. The zombie began to scream again, its entire body covered in fire....its flesh melting and blackening until there was nothing left but a pile of ashes on the ground. 


	8. Undone

Rinoa stormed back onto the Forest Owls car, making her way back to the control room. They'd captured the lone guard and had managed to beat some information out of him. It was true that Deling had intended to come to Timber, however he hadn't come by train. The train was just a decoy, a trap set to keep any resistance groups from causing harm to the President. That rat bastard had come by helicopter and now he was in Timber. Set and ready to make some kind of announcement at the old television station that hadn't worked in years.  _That station was well over twenty years old and so hopelessly outdated they'd never get it to work with the newer equipment_...she fumed inwardly.

"Why the HELL would he be at the television station! Even if they could clean it up and get it working...there's no way they'd be able to send any signals from it. The radio tower in Timber's been torn down! How the hell are they going to announce anything when they can't even send a signal out! He has to be lying..." Rinoa snarled, kicking a chair in the control room.

Zell had been sitting quietly with Squall and Selphie in a corner of the control room. He suddenly remembered the radio tower in Dollet and piped up, "What if the tower they were using wasn't in Timber? Squall...remember the old communications tower in Dollet? What if Galbadia got that thing running and intended to use it to send signals from the television station here in Timber."

"Yeah, I guess it'd work...." turning over the idea slowly, "It still seems kind of silly to use such outdated technology."

"Well, He could use it to send signals to regions that don't receive cable...it would reach a wider audience then." Zell replied.

Rinoa didn't care why Deling was doing this or how. She felt so stupid....so naive....he'd made a fool of her!. How much longer would her country have to suffer? How many more people would have to die? She was tired of it...tired of going to sleep, wondering if her friends would be there in the morning...tired of seeing her people oppressed, beaten down by a ruthless government....Slamming her fists on the desk in frustration, she whirled around.

"DAMN HIM! We're going to that station...it ends here. I don't care who comes with me...I'm going.", throwing the door to the control room open and storming out. 

"RINOA! WAIT!" Watts called after her as she fled down towards the end of the train.

"Where does she think she's going?" Zell asked.

"After Deling.....In the last car we store a couple of  ATVs...This train's a hunk of junk, every now and then it breaks down. So we keep a couple of vehicles around, just in case..." Watts answered, "Um, I hate to ask, but could you go after her? There's no stopping her when she's in a mood like this and I'm afraid she'll get hurt. After what happened in that car, I'm thinking you guys are the best for the job." 

Zell nodded and started down the corridor after her. He managed to get to the last car before Rinoa had even left. "Rinoa..." he said, his voice bouncing off the cavernous interior of the cab, "What do you think you're doing?"

"What does it matter to you?" 

"You're just going to storm off? No plan in mind....by yourself?"

"I..." she stopped, propping herself up on the side of the jeep, "I don't know....I can't think of anything else to do. All the suffering that man has caused....I can't let him get away with it."

"Would you mind some help....after all you hired us. We'd be happy to go with you." 

"Yes.... Zell....thanks...."

"No problem...." Zell answered, walking over to her and putting his hand on her shoulder. She smiled slightly, touching his hand with her own. Just then Squall and Selphie entered the room, Zell quickly took his hand off Rinoa. He felt guilty all of a sudden, like he was doing something he wasn't supposed to. 

Selphie walked up to Zell, her eyes narrowed and a wry smile painted on her face, she chimed, "We didn't INTERRUPT...did we?"

"N-no....Rinoa just asked if we'd go up to Timber's T.V. station with her. We don't have much of a plan, but at the very least we can go and see what's up." Zell answered, blushing. He looked over at Squall, who looked like he was about to have a cow. _Oh shit_....

Squall felt angry and betrayed, he didn't know why. It's not like he liked Rinoa or anything...far from it. The image of Zell's hand on Rinoa's shoulder, the way her hand had touched his....he couldn't let go of it. Why was he touching her.....why had she responded in kind?  Squall started breathing faster, his heart hammering, a surge of adrenaline pulsing through his veins. He wasn't jealous....was he? The desire to hit something....to smash it to bits was overwhelming. Closing his eyes, he breathed in deeply, controlling his rising anger. 

He answered robotically, "Fine then....let's go."

It took less than an hour to drive the jeep all the way to downtown Timber. After some initial confusion, they located the newly renovated television station. The security was pretty tight and they were all unsure of how to get inside. There was a large bank of view screens mounted on the front of the building. They stopped the car to discuss their options.

"Well, what do you think?" Zell asked.

Rinoa cocked her head, "Geesh, I don't know........I wonder what he's going to announce anyway?"

"Love and Peace?" Selphie chirped.

"That'd be nice, but all things considered I doubt it.....Gosh, Almost makes you hope the first television transmission in years would be an announcement of Timber's independence....That's it! I bet we could sneak around back and break in! We'd get on T.V. and declare Timber's liberation!"

"Wait, I think they're starting...." Squall said, his lack of enthusiasm evident.

The bank of television screens lit up, crackled and then cleared as an image appeared. It was Vinzer Deling himself, standing at a podium, red curtains draping gracefully behind him. He opened his mouth to begin his speech but before he could get a word out the picture dissolved into white noise. When the picture cleared, Rinoa and the three SeeDs saw a familiar face. A young man with cropped blonde hair had taken Deling hostage, holding a slim, black gunblade. _Seifer_....

"Don't move or he dies..." Seifer snarled, forcibly pulling Deling off camera.

All four watched in mutual horror, jumping at the unexpected ring from Zell's cell phone. "Hello....Yes..." Zell answered, taking the phone from his ear, he said to Squall, "It's for you....it's Professor Trepe."

Squall took the phone, "Yeah....."

"Have you seen what's happened at the T.V. station? If you haven't, we need you right away. Seifer's gone nuts. He broke out of the brig when he found out where they sent you.....Now he's here, he's kidnapped President Deling and I'm afraid he's going to cause an international incident if we don't stop him. Where ever you are, drop what you're doing and get here ASAP!" 

"Yes...we'll be right there..." Squall said, clicking off the phone, "We have to go....Professor Trepe's in there and needs our help. Rinoa, you better stay here...this isn't your business..."

"The hell it isn't.....Deling's in there and I'm going....You go ahead and try to stop me..." 

"Fine....but you're on your own." 

The three SeeDs and Rinoa snuck down a small side street to reach the back of the television station. There were no guards, making their way up a catwalk that lead to the back of the studio. They opened the door to the studio, a scene of mayhem and panic greeted them. Seifer stood in one corner, near a door that lead to the prop room. He held his gunblade to Deling's throat. The crew had panicked and left the studio in shambles. A large camera lay on its side, headphones and headsets littering the floor. Quistis stood in front of Seifer, holding her hands out to show him that she had no weapon.

"Please, put your weapon down...let him go...and nothing will happen to you.." Quistis said, her voice placatory. 

"Come over here and make me, bitch..." Seifer growled, tightening his grip on the President, who looked absolutely terrified. 

"Pu-Puh-Please help me..." Deling begged.

"SHUT UP!" Seifer barked, digging his blade into the squealing President's neck. 

Squall quietly motioned the rest of his crew into the studio, making sure that Seifer, nor anyone else, would notice. Hunching down behind some tipped over sound equipment Squall pondered what he should do. He looked over at Rinoa,  she was the only one with a truly long rang weapon, he waived her over. 

Leaning in, he whispered, "Do you think you could shoot his hand from here?"

"Yeah, but why? You think I want to save Deling's ass? If Seifer takes him out all the better. "

"I understand your anger with Deling, but killing him won't solve anything. Deep down you have to know that. If you kill him, you'd be no better than he is...." Zell replied from behind her.

"When you put it that way..." she said, reluctantly raising her arm and taking aim.

She shot off her pinwheel, hitting Seifer just above the wrist. He gave a cry in pain, dropping his weapon long enough for Deling to escape. Quistis flicked out her whip and raised it high, cracking it into the air and lashing it down, the whip winding around Seifer's already abraded wrist. He winced, quickly grabbing hold of the whip and yanking it, sending Quistis to the ground hard. She hit the floor with a thud, knocking into the scattered equipment. Stars burst behind her eyes, and she curled into a ball trying her best not to pass out. Seifer took this as his moment of triumph, bending over his latest victim to see if she was still conscious. Squall lunged forward, gunblade drawn and pointed at Seifer's head.

"It's over...give up..."

"I _KNEW_ it....I knew Cid would send his pet SeeD after me," Seifer snarled. He spread his lips in a lunatic's caricature of a grin, turning his scar livid. "Come here and let me teach you another lesson." 

Zell and Selphie stepped from the shadows. 

"Hmmm..." Seifer smiled, "I thought I smelled chicken shit."

Zell stepped forward, fists clenching and unclenching, "Shut your fucking noise hole! When we get you back to Balamb....."

"NO!!" Quistis lurched from the floor, clutching her bruised ribs, "NO!! THE CAMERAS...."

Before Zell even had time to regret letting the name of their Garden slip, Seifer had breeched the distance between them, smashing the heel of his palm into Zell's nose. Zell staggered backward, groping at his face, and toppling into one of the large camera, bringing it, himself and Quistis all crashing on top of Rinoa. Squall leapt at Seifer, swinging his gunblade over his head in a blind rage. Seifer dove left, rolled up from the floor with a piece of the scattered video debris in his hand and had the missile airborne all before Squall could recover from his wild swing. The chunk of metal struck Squall in the temple, sending him to the floor. His gunblade clattered out of his grasp. Through a red-rimmed blur of crackling agony, Squall watched his former classmate recover his black bladed weapon and slip through a door...before the blackness overtook him and all he saw was nothingness. 

Seifer slammed the door to the prop room closed. "Dammit. Shit. Dammit."

The room was pitch black. No lights. No electricity.

"Dammit. Fuck me. Shit"

He groped around the room for something with which to barricade the door. The asshole SeeDs wouldn't take long to recover and regroup. He could take out Chicken shit by himself, and –of course—Squall, and probably even the bitch and his ex-whore but all of them together.......Maybe.......Maybe not.....In front of the door he threw all the junk his fumbling hands could light upon, cursing quietly into the midnight darkness of the room. Galbadia was sure to retaliate against Balamb. Seifer wished for nothing more than to lead the attack, just so he could see the look on Squall's face when his precious home burned to cinders. _That and a way out of this god damned room_.... Wisps of eerie light from the back of the room caught his attention,  and he stared at it wonderingly. Had the fates heard him, and would they for once in his miserable life allow something to work out in his favor?  The wisps of light swirled, the light becoming much to bright to look at directly. Seifer squinted, blinking away the pain so he could continue watching the light as it formed.  The light warped the solidity of the wall and it began to ripple, rolling in and out like waves on the water, creating a vortex, a unfathomable portal..... From this dark portal stepped a tall woman, dressed in a royal purple skin tight dress. Somehow she illuminated the tiny space by her very presence. The woman was wearing an elaborate mask that covered half her pale face, which was a death's head. She stepped forward slowly, with the grace of a queen.  Seifer held out his gunblade, his arms trembling, yet ready to attack.

"STOP RIGHT THERE!!" he squeaked, fear filling his being. 

"Poor boy...." she hissed, her voice smooth and rhythmic, moving forward with each word, "So confused.....without direction....without hope.....without escape.."

"I SAID STOP!" 

"And what will you do? Shoot me with that weapon of yours?" she said, mocking him. She raised her hand, swiping at the air.....the gunblade vibrated in his hand and suddenly flew from his grip, clattering to the ground near her feet.... She laughed, "You little boys and your toys.....Pathetic..."

"W-w-w-w-what....WHO ARE YOU?"

"OOOoo, You're afraid and you don't know what to do? Don't fear me, boy....I can help you......make you powerful, more powerful than your enemy....more powerful than....what is his name?" she said, her purple lips twisting into an unpleasant smile. 

"Squall...." Seifer answered weakly, he was so confused.

"Yes, Squall....Will you be my knight, boy? That is your dream, isn't it? To be a brave knight....protecting your queen. I AM your queen.....Protect me from those SeeDs...boy" 

"I'm not a boy...." __

"No...you're not a boy...You're a knight...a white knight.....MY knight....Come with me....I can make your every dream come true..." She said, lifting a hand to beckon him.

He stumbled forward, unaware of his surroundings....barely in control of his own body, bending slowly to pick up his gunblade. Could she really make his dreams come true? He had all but given up any hope that they would. He'd been suspended at the Garden, thrown into the brig....there was no future for him there. What did he have left but his dream....to be a knight, like in all the stories. A knight protecting his queen and country. If she was telling him the truth, he'd follow her anywhere. The door behind him began to rattle and shake, the SeeDs were trying to enter. Seifer hesitated and looked back, watching as the door gave way and Squall stepped into the half light of the prop room.

"What are you waiting for? Come with me and become my Knight....or go with them.....do they have anything to offer you but more humiliation? I offer the world at your feet..." she whispered, lifting a hand towards the wall, instantly rippling its surface. 

"Yes......" 

Squall couldn't see very well, his vision still blurry and unfocused from his blow to the head. Shaking the cobwebs free, it had seemed like Seifer was talking to someone but...all Squall could see was the dark shape of a woman moving behind him. Suddenly the back wall of the room began to ripple and glow, a dark hole of some kind forming in the wall. He dashed forward....the wall quickly reformed, Seifer and his companion disappeared behind it. Quistis, Zell and Selphie entered the dark prop room. Quistis stopped at the door, dragging over one of the powerful lights from the news room. What greeted them was a mostly empty prop room and no Seifer.

"Where'd he go? There's no way out of this room" Quistis said.

"This is going to sound crazy but.....I think he disappeared into the wall. Someone else was here....someone with some very powerful magic. I saw it with my own eyes and I can't believe it."

"Dammit..." Quistis said, stamping a foot, "Well, I better get back to Balamb and report it. Let's just hope that Galbadia doesn't retaliate against the Garden because of this."

Rinoa stepped into the room, rubbing her back with her knuckles, "Fat chance you're going anywhere........Have you looked outside? The entire front end is surrounded by soldiers. They're probably already sending some around to that back alley. If we don't leave now...our asses are grass. Beyond even that, since they know you're from Balamb, any trains headed that way are going to be stopped and searched. There's no way your getting back to that Garden of yours."

Quistis's eyes narrowed, ....it was that girl Squall had danced with. She asked politely,  "Well, where do you suggest we go?"

"There's a safe house around here that I know of...I could take you there for the time being." 

They left the television station through the back alley, going down the catwalk silently. They could see Watts running up the stairs from the bottom. He reached them quickly, out of breath and tired, it took him a minute to recuperate enough to speak.

"Rinoa...they found our base....everything's messed up.....I managed to get you guyes stuff out....Angelo's okay....but we won't be able to go back..."

"NO!" she whispered, turning to look at Squall with lost, helpless eyes, "What are we going to do?"

"Are you seriously asking me that?" he said, a hint of sarcasm entering his voice. He didn't need her crap right now.....his head hurt and at this point, he didn't really care what happened to her or any of her resistance group friends......_Why doesn't she ask Zell for help, he gives a damn_...

"Excuse me... What's your problem?" Rinoa said, putting her hands on her hips. 

"Never mind, it doesn't matter..."

"No....I don't think so....If you have something to say to me, then say it."

"Why the hell do you care about what I think?....I'm not your friend.....I don't give a rat's ass about you or your cause. You _hired _me...you're my boss and the supposed leader of this ass backwards group..... You're rank amateurs......too stupid to realize what kind of game you're playing. We're professionals for gods sakes! It's an insult we even have to work for you people! Solve your own damn problems....Get your head out of your ass, then call me..."

"Really....is that it." Rinoa answered in a calm, steady voice,  her eyes growing dark with anger, "You're right....I'm an amateur.....I never wanted to fight, but I did because I had to. Because I believe what I'm doing is the right thing. Because if I don't no one else will. So tell me, being _such_ a professional.....What do you fight for Squall? What's your grand cause? SeeD helps people right? So how do you help them, Squall....." She waited for a moment, "What? No answer, but SeeD helps right, and  I'm sure you just help people out of the _kindness of your heart_.... wait, you fight for the most honorable cause known to man. Money. Screw morality, who cares if innocent people suffer and die.....Nice cause you have there. I may be an amateur, but you're no better than a _whore_, standing on the corner waiting for the highest bidder. I'm so sorry to take up your precious time with my silly cause. I'm sure there's a lot of other people who'll pay big bucks for your _service_.....Fuck you....Fuck SeeD.....Fuck the whole damn lot of you....."

She whirled around and began to stalk off, Watts trailing behind her. Squall stood there, dumfounded....No one had ever talked back to him like that before. Everyone else had frozen in place, watching uncomfortably as the scene played out. Zell reacted immediately, his first thought was to diffuse her anger somehow. She was the only one who knew the area enough to get them out of this situation.

"Rinoa...WAIT!" Zell called after her, looking at Squall with irritation. _Why did he have to do that_.....

She spun around, her eyes flashing with rage, ".......If I understood the Great God Leonhart, I'm on my own..........I'm leaving.....you can burn in hell for all I care...."

"Rinoa....we can't just leave them..." Watts said, quietly.

"Why the hell not.....They're big important SeeDs... They don't need the advice of rank amateurs!", her eyes glaring at Squall with absolute hatred......_He's just like Seifer_..._an arrogant jerk. How could I even think he'd be any different?_

"It's not right....Noni, you know what will happen if we leave them here....I know you're pissed....and you have a right to be, but don't let that blind you. You'd be no better than them if you did." Watts said, looking at her earnestly. 

_That line never fails_..._dammit_..... sighing she conceded, answering desolately, "Fine.....let's go...."

Rinoa and Watts waited at the bottom of the stairs for all four SeeDs. Her body was still trembling, she'd never been that angry before. How cold could one person be? She could hear the distant clatter of  approaching soldiers. The SeeDs were much too slow, they'd have to get moving if they didn't want to be caught. _No time_...Rinoa snapped at them to move their asses, taking off as fast as she could go down the alleyway. She dodged and weaved, leading the SeeDs down the twisting back alleys of Timber.....not really caring if they followed. Finally arriving at the small home of Mei Aiko, a former resistance member that now ran a safe house. She knocked rapidly three times in succession, an older woman answered the door with  a look of surprise.

"Noa! What are you doing here, sweetie?!"

"We're in a bit of a spot Mei....could we stay here....we have soldiers after us." Rinoa said, feeling herself loose her cool. 

"Sure, come on in..."

She ushered Rinoa and the others into her small, but comfortable home. Seeing that Rinoa was visibly upset, she asked her other guests to have a seat. Ushering Rinoa and Watts into another room. Waiving at her younger daughter, Reika, to get their guests some refreshments. Mei walked into the master bedroom, where she'd left Rinoa.

"What's going on? You okay..." Mei asked cautiously.

"N-Nothing....it's just everything's all messed up and...", unable to control her emotions any longer, she began to cry, "I just don't know what I should do...Our last mission went to hell and they found our base....Now I have no where to go...and..."

"It's okay....everything will work out fine...you know that. Why don't you rest for a bit....Watts, could you please keep an eye on her." He nodded and sat down on a chair near the bed.

Rinoa lay on the small bed and curled up into a little ball, falling into a half-sleep almost immediately. Mei left the bedroom and entered the living room, where the SeeDs were enjoying some tea that Reika had made. 

"Rinoa's resting in the back...Now, who are you people?" she asked sternly. 

Squall stood up, his head lowered and answered quietly, "We're from Balamb Garden...we were helping the Forest Owls out." 

"Fine job you did too...Well, you better figure out what you're going to do." She said, eyeing the young man who'd spoken to her, "What's your name?"

"Squall...." 

"Well, Squall....it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out where you've gone. Sooner or later those soldiers will be banging on my door. I'll give you refuge here for the night, but you best decide what you're going to do before morning. I'll leave you to make up your minds..", walking into her kitchen to prepare dinner for all her guests. 

After Mei had left, the four SeeDs gathered together in the living room. Zell sat quietly in a large chair in the corner. Selphie plopped down on the floor, next to Quistis, who'd taken up a seat on the couch. Squall continued to stand....he felt as if every eye in the room was on him. He kicked himself for loosing his temper with Rinoa....not only did it make him look really bad...but...the look in her eyes after he said....not to mention what she'd said to him..... she hated him now. For one of the first times in his life he didn't know what he should do. He wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

"Well, now what?" Selphie chirped.

"Who cares...." Zell answered glumly, "Everything's all screwed up anyway..."

"Zell, that's no way to talk...." Quistis chided, "The protocol we follow is to go to the nearest Garden if going back to our own is impossible. Galbadia Garden isn't far from here...maybe we can ask Rinoa for one last favor."

"Yeah....like that'll happen. We're lucky she even lead us here..." Zell said, never feeling worse for himself in his life, "Garden's screwed, we're screwed....might as well give up."

"You're not helping..." Quistis snapped irritably, and got up, "I'm going to ask Watts if he can arrange some train tickets to get us out of here.....Squall, could I have a moment." 

He walked over to her listlessly, feeling very much the same way Zell was. Quistis couldn't believe how this entire situation had blown up in her face. Zell was right about one thing, everything was seriously screwed up. They didn't catch Seifer, they managed to cause an international incident that directly implicated Balamb Garden and ostracized the only person who could help get their asses out of stir. She took Squall aside, as leader he was responsible for this mess and she was more than eager to ream him out. 

"I'd like you to explain exactly what you were trying to do back there..." she said in an angry whisper.

"I don't know...I..." he stammered, unable to look her in the face.

"That girl is the only help we have here. We won't get far without her...she knows the area better than we do, she can find connections that we can't....besides the fact that she is your client...she is PAYING for your services. No matter how much you dislike your mission, you never insult the client. Now, without her willingness to assist us we are dead in the water. You better hope that when she wakes up she'll help us."

"....If you want me to step down as leader...I..." 

"No, I don't but even if you did, that doesn't fix this situation....As a leader, you need better judgment than you've exhibited so far. Now, I don't want to hear another word out of you.....Sit down and keep your big mouth shut." She stalked away, quietly entering the bedroom where Rinoa had been taken. _Let's hope I can salvage this mess_....

She looked at the young girl curled up on the bed, fast asleep. Quistis had felt the lash of Squall's temper many times. She couldn't help but feel a bit of empathy for the poor kid, though she'd handled herself better than Quistis ever did. She stood in the room, watching Rinoa's chest heave up and down in light sleep. Looking at Watts, who sat with his head cradled in his hands in the chair next to the bed, she coughed to get his attention.

He looked up, fresh tears in his eyes, "What do you want now?"

Quistis walked over slowly, sitting down on the bed next to Rinoa's prone form, "I wanted to apologize for Squall's indiscretion.....I've had a talk with him, and he now knows that the kind of behavior he exhibited today is unacceptable by Garden standards. I also need your help...."

"Anything to get you to leave..." Watts answered, wiping away his tears.

Rinoa stirred, "What's going on..."

"They need our help again...."

She sat up, looking to her right and seeing Quistis, "Who are you anyway? Why should I help you?"

"My name is Quistis Trepe....I'm Squall's former teacher and his Supervising Officer..."

"Didja teach him to be the big jerk that he is?" Rinoa asked bitterly.

"No...and I'm very sorry. It's not Garden's policy to insult our clients.  He's been reprimanded...if you'd like him to apologize himself, I can order him to..."

"No....that's okay. I'd rather he do it on his own. What do you need?" Rinoa said, rubbing her eyes. 

Quistis almost laughed at the suggestion that Squall might apologize on his own. Holding her tongue, she said, "Tickets to Galbadia Garden....I'll take Squall and the rest of the Squad there....from Galbadia I can make a request to send you a new group of SeeDs, that is if that's what you want."

Rinoa shook her head, "I'll help you....and I don't need a refund to placate me...the only condition I have is that you allow me to go with you. If our base has been found, it's guaranteed that the rest of the Owls have left and gone into hiding.....They won't stop until they've found all of us. So I have to leave...I'd like to request political asylum....If I could return with you to Balamb Garden."

"Of course you may come with us....I'm very sorry it ended like this for you. If there's anything else I can do, please ask." Quistis said, setting her hand on Rinoa's, "On a personal note.....Thanks for all your help. You've been more than kind. I'm sorry we haven't....."


	9. Waiting Without You

The hours passed slowly in the cramped confines of the Aiko's home. It gave everyone lots of time to think over what had happened. Rinoa had secluded herself in the back bedroom since the moment they arrived. After Quistis had talked with both her and Watts, he ended up leaving to secure tickets for all four SeeDs and Rinoa. Squall sat sullenly the entire time....wishing he could go back in time and fix the mess that he'd partially caused. It just proved his point, people weren't meant to be with each other. Personal relationships were just a bother, and you could only dig yourself a grave by depending on them. In a way, he did himself a favor by getting Rinoa to hate him...she'd be better off without him. _If that's true, how come I feel so bad,_ he thought, feeling like he might cry.  

After a bit, Mei served dinner, encouraging her guests to join her at the large table in the kitchen. Rinoa eventually came out and joined them. She was very quiet and kept her eyes downcast, fearing to look at any of them. The mood at the table was tense, no body talked, just ate silently....the sound of scrapping forks on china the only noise filling the room. The mood lightened a little when ten year old Reika decided to tell some jokes to Selphie. Most of them were pretty stupid, but she told them with a child's delight in the absurd. Her enthusiasm was infectious, and soon had most of the room in much better spirits. Dinner ended on a good note, and everyone dispersed to different corners. Selphie and Reika had taken a shine to each other and played dolls quietly in one corner. Quistis was in the kitchen, helping Mei with dishes. Squall went and sulked in a corner of the living room. Rinoa sat on the stairs that lead to the second floor, directly opposite where Squall was sitting. She glared at him, wishing with all her heart that she could burst his head open by the power of her stare alone. Zell walked over and joined her pity party on the stairs.

"S'up..." Zell asked, propping his elbows on his knees. 

"hmmpf...like you care...You're just hired hands...." Rinoa replied dully. 

"Seriously....I know we all started off on the wrong foot. I'd like to try and make it up to you." 

"Yeah...sure....probably ordered to make nice with me..."

"Dude! I take offense to that....I came here of my own free will...I just wanted to talk and patch things up. To show you that we're not a bunch of assholes.....I'm really sorry about the way that whole thing went down....that, and I gotta show some respect for someone who can burn that bad...you still pissed? If you are, I'll let you hit me n' stuff....I'm Selphie's one stop stress relief punching bag...I'm sure she won't mind if you take a turn..."

"No...not really....I'm sorry....I know you mean well.....I'm just depressed, that's all....Squall was right, I'm a lousy leader. Nobody ever fricking listened to me....Watts was the only one I could depend on. I hated my job... I-It's like....I feel like all I do is yell at people all the time! GOD!...  How could I expect professionals to work for me, when I can't even get a stupid bunch of volunteers to wipe their own asses? I'm such an idiot.... I'm sorry....it's not fair of me to unload all this on you...it's not like we're friends or anything."

"Sez who? Now I'M REEEALLY offended...In the very short time I've known you, you've become my new bestest friend...so let it out......You know, we all gotta decompress sometimes...you can go on if it makes you feel better.....I really don't mind......."

" Oh god........What am I going to do?" she said, resting her head in her hands, her voice trembling and tears splashing down her face, "I have nothing left....I started this out with so much hope...and now...everything I've worked so hard for, everything I've dreamed of.....all gone...All I could think was that once SeeD was here, everything would be okay.........After that dance at Garden, when I first found out we'd receive SeeD's help, I was walking on air... I really believed that SeeD could solve all my problems and now....and after that dance, I mean god.....It was like everything finally was going my way, the stars had aligned.....the fates said, Okay, this is your chance, go for it....and that he was...God.... I'm such a dumb ass...."

"Don't say that....What do you mean?" 

Rinoa looked down as she wiped her tears away, "I can't believe I'm telling you this....Squall.....I met him at that party of yours, we danced.....it was like the most magical, romantic moment of my life. My romantic daydream.....to find love and adventure in one neat package....stupid really. Just seeing things when they weren't there."

 "Hmmm I see. Squall's not really so bad....I know you're pissed at him for what he said....I might add, you got him back big time... Hell, he didn't even have a comeback... and he ALWAYS has a comeback. This was the first time I've _ever_ seen him speechless...........Seriously...I've known him for four years, moody is his middle name. Squall's a pretty complex guy and I don't always understand why he does the stuff he does....but I'm sure he was just PMSing like a great big girl. "

She turned her head and looked at him incredulously, "Excuse me....I'm offended on behalf of all women, everywhere...."

"What? I think he'd make a lovely girl....okay, not really...but get him in a dress and a wig and we'd be in business..... okay...no....but if you were dead drunk, and on crack, and blind maybe....."

"You're a dork..." she said, smiling a little.

"Yeah, but I did get you to smile....Want to go and play a game of cards? Get our minds off things... I brought mine with me...and I'm sure that Selphie and Reika wouldn't mind playing."

"I guess..."

"You're not smiling..." he teased, reaching over and tickling her on her bare leg. 

"STOP IT!!" she said, giggling...that effortless smile of hers appearing on her face, "He's damn lucky he has a friend like you. I should fall for somebody so nice."

"Oooooo.....SAILOR!"

She laughed and ruffled his hair, "......Let's go...weirdo..."

"HEY! Watch the hair!" checking and patting his head protectively, which only made her laugh harder.

Squall watched Rinoa and Zell goof around....shouldn't that be him making her laugh and smile, not Zell....._No_....._shut up_.....he hissed inwardly to himself. He knew he should be the one making peace with Rinoa, but he couldn't find the strength. He plunged into a deep despair....trying so hard to keep his outwardly cold exterior from cracking under the pressure. He knew he was jealous....that was half the reason he said all the things he did. He was angry at her...that she could make such fast friends with Zell and not him...angry at himself for being damn fool enough to betray his own values.... Zell had it so good, he was a happy go lucky type of guy that everything came easily to. Squall had to work for what he had.....nothing had come to him without a price of some kind. Girls giggled at Zell....he was funny...nice to have around.....Most girls were just afraid of Squall...he was moody and uncommunicative...not exactly the kind of guy you wanted to hang around with...not that he really needed their attention..... Still, he longed to have someone like Rinoa to share his feelings with...and yet as much as he wanted it, he feared it. How could he tell her how he felt, when those feelings scared him so deeply. His loneliness consumed him, eating at his heart like never before. He knew what he'd been missing....That inner voice that was once so small had become louder.....it told him that he was missing what Rinoa could have given him.... There was no way to repair what he'd done....no words he could say that'd make up for what he said. You can say I'm sorry but it never takes the sting out of the words. What was done, was done and no amount of I'm sorrys and mea culpas would change that.  But the wall had been broken from around his heart and was crumbling further every minute....she'd broken it....and he had no protection now, his heart ached like it hadn't in years. He shut himself off to rid himself of this feeling and even then he ended up feeling alone and worthless. 

Rinoa, Zell, Selphie, and little Reika began to play a game of cards. All four laughing and joking with each other. Once again Squall found himself watching others have a good time, while he was miserable. He couldn't stand it anymore, he got up and went up the stairs to the second floor. Opening a small bay window in the second floor bedroom, he watched the sky, a sea of stars twinkling in the night.....just like the night he met Rinoa. _I'm such a coward_..._ worthless_...the calm shimmering light of the stars calmed him somewhat. Though his feelings were terribly close to the surface of his paper thin mask. He sighed, shaking away regret,  _What was the use in mourning what could have been? This is what I wanted anyway_...A noise in the corner made him jump with surprise, it was Zell, standing in the half lighted room. He so didn't need this right now...

"Hey....You alright...I just saw you go up here and stuff..." Zell stammered awkwardly. 

"Just leave...."

"Alright....but before I go...I just wanted to tell you that nothing happened between me and Rinoa....I know what you're thinking, and even if I wanted to make a move on her, I couldn't. She's crazy for you....She told me so herself...."

"Why would I care?" Squall said, turning his face away to hide his vulnerability. 

"Because you like her too....don't tell me that you don't....it's been written on your face since that night you danced with her. The sooner you're honest with yourself about it, the better." 

"Whatever..." 

"Fine...Keep lying to yourself....I meant what I said before, you're nuts if you don't go after this girl. And if you don't do it, someone else will..." Zell said, not understanding his friend a bit, he left Squall to brood. He learned long ago there was no talking to him when he was in a mood like this. 

The night wore on and on, and Squall was quite sure it'd never end....that he was really dead and this was his own private hell. He stayed up in the second floor bedroom, afraid and unwilling to go downstairs and face up to the aftermath. Squall sat in the complete darkness, doubting himself more than ever. What kind of leader was he? He let his emotions get the better of him....He began to think about what Rinoa had said to him. What did he believe in? Nothing....there wasn't a single thing he could think of.....he never did anything without being told to.....Maybe she was right, maybe he was an automaton, a whore for a paycheck....unable to think or feel for himself. Why did what she thought of him matter? He didn't like her...Squall repeated it over and over and over again, and no matter how many times he did it, he never felt any different. He was more confused than he'd been before..... _I thought I'd never feel like this again_...He closed his eyes tightly, to shut out the pain and to keep himself from thinking. 

Quistis beckoned him from the bottom of  the stairs at around ten and he reluctantly complied. Watts had returned with the tickets that would get them to Galbadia Garden and their meager belongings. He'd decided to find them a more indirect route, to avoid any suspicious military personal from making inquiries. They'd take a 7 o'clock train to the East Academy Station, from there they'd walk the last five miles to Galbadia Garden. After he'd relayed his information, Watts bid everyone a good night, having found another place to stay. Before he left for good, he gave Rinoa a big bear hug.

"I probably won't see you for awhile, Noni....I'm gonna miss you." Watts said, squeezing her tight. 

"Same here...Take care of Angelo for me, okay? When I get to Balamb....could you find a way to send him to me?" Rinoa asked, her eyes welling with tears. 

"Sure, Your Highness...."

"Don't call me that....you know I hate it." She said, giggling and sniffling at the same time, "Say good bye to Zone and the others for me...be careful..."

"Bye..."

"Yeah.....Good-bye..." 

Watts turned and left, waiving at Rinoa as he closed the door. Rinoa wrapped her arms around herself, and covering her mouth with her hand, she began to cry. Mei draped an arm around her slim shoulders, smoothing her hair while making soothing motherly sounds.

"Quistis...is it? Could you please help Rinoa upstairs? I need to get everyone some bedding so that we can all get a good night's sleep. You all have an early day....For propriety's sake...girls upstairs, boys in the living room...." Mei said, giving off orders like a general. She bustled off to get the linens, praying that everything would work out for poor Rinoa. 

A bit of chaos ensued, between deciding where to sleep and making up their make shift beds. Rinoa and Selphie shared the small bed in the second floor bedroom. While Quistis made herself as comfortable as she could on the floor next to it. Mei and Reika retired to the master bedroom. Squall sat down in the overstuffed reclinable chair, letting Zell take the couch. He wasn't tired and sleep was likely to be elusive tonight.  Squall sat in the dark again, listening to Zell snore in oblivious slumber. He got up from the chair and walked over to the large picture window. Opening the curtains a crack, he watched the stars....they seemed to bring some kind of peace to his soul, which was writhing in pain. 


	10. Fool to Cry

Rinoa couldn't sleep, she'd tossed and turned and no position she tried seemed comfortable. Zell's talk had done her some good, but she still felt like crap. It didn't help that Selphie kept hogging the covers and trying to roll over her all the time. The stupid thing was, she was exhausted, every bone in her body screamed for sleep and yet it never came. _Why is only when you're tired you can't sleep_?....She got up, maybe if she got a drink of milk it'd help her insomnia. Mei had let her borrow her older daughter's night gown, who was away at college. She wouldn't mind if Rinoa dug around in her kitchen as well. 

She slipped off the bed quietly, tip-toeing around Quistis. _Super Secret Ninja Rinoa creeps through the room like a shadow in the night_... _whoosh_....she thought, stifling a laugh. Stepping silently down the stairs, trying to avoid the squeaky spots. Halfway down the stairs Rinoa noticed that someone else couldn't sleep. She paused mid-step and from her relatively hidden position on the stair she could make out the shadowed form of someone sitting in a chair by the window. The living room was much darker than her bedroom had been and only a small silver of light escaped through the crack in the curtain. Her eyes adjusted a bit, squinting...it was Squall....She drew in a small breath, her heart jumping in her chest. Rinoa found her body unwilling to move, afraid that at any moment he might notice her......_And what? I'm acting like he's the boogey man or something_..._I've never been afraid of anyone before_..._why's he so special?  To hell with it_..._I'm frickin' tired and thirsty_...  With titanic effort, she willed her legs to move, involuntarily trying to be as quiet as she could. She sped through the room, pretending she didn't notice him but all the while stealing glances as she went. He had made note of her entrance, glancing as she left for the kitchen. After she got her milk, waiting till she thought he wasn't looking anymore, Rinoa peeked around the corner of the kitchen. She could see the silhouette of his form in the pale light of the moon, shimmering in the darkness. He bowed his head, propping it up with a hand as he watched the stars. He sighed deeply, his entire body shuddering with the effort....his face so pale and made to look almost fragile, sliver light cascading over his features. Rinoa scrunched up her nose and biting her lip, she wondered if maybe she'd misjudged him.  _This is silly_..._ We only had a fight_..._that's no reason to hold a grudge_...._no reason for anyone to feel this bad_...she thought... Gathering up her courage, she left the safety of the kitchen. Rinoa breathed in and out slowly, her heart hammering,  and cautiously walked up to him. 

"Hey...." she said, trying to sound cheerful but ending up just sounding nervous.

He didn't answer, giving her a cursory sideways glance and then turning back to the window.  Rinoa played nervously with her hair and breathed in deeply. She pulled up a chair and sat down next to him. 

 "......So....are we just going to sit here in the dark and ignore each other... or...??"

Again he didn't answer, this time not even glancing to acknowledge her presence, staring out into the sleeping city.

"Oooookay....I guess I deserved that, so I'll go first...I'm sorry, Squall...I'm sorry I lost my temper.... I know I can be a bit of a spoiled brat sometimes and maybe what you said hit home a little....I lashed out and it wasn't right......"

His eyes unflinching, he growled, "Go away.....leave me alone..."

Rinoa stopped and pushed back the urge to smack the hell out of him. _You came to apologize, not to get into another argument, idiot_....."Listen...I came over here in good faith........I regret that I acted like a total bitch. I was upset and I'm sincerely sorry that I said some things that hurt you. I thought that if I could give you another chance, maybe you could do the same...I don't want to be angry anymore.......I don't want to cause tension or get you into hot water with your...boss or whatever.... I'm really very sorry but if you can't forgive me, it's okay....... Anyway, I guess I just wanted you to know that ...I'll go now..." 

Rinoa got up to leave, as she glanced back,  Squall turned his head and looked directly at her. She was caught off guard by the intensity of his gaze. It was all she could do to just stand there, her heart thumping. 

"I'm sorry......" he said softly, watching her with those eyes....so silent and cold.....and yet a fire burned behind them, seething with held back emotion. They  held such sadness....she could almost feel his sorrow, striking her like a physical pain. He broke eye contact quickly and went back to staring at the sky. 

Rinoa walked back to her room, butterflies twirling around her stomach. Everything was okay, sort of....at least she didn't feel like throwing up anymore. She lay her head down on the pillow, and whether it was the milk or the resolution, it didn't matter. She fell into a deep sleep almost immediately. 

Rinoa found herself in an endless field, filled with every kind of flower she'd ever seen...._Where am I?_ She thought lazily....A sudden gust of wind buffeted her, blowing petals off the bowing heads of the flowers surrounding her....The petals danced and twirled around her...she watched in amazement, tilting back her head to follow their progress upwards, towards bright blue summer sky ....reaching out her right hand and snagging one of the petals....she opened her fist and looked at the petal she just caught... fingering its supple pink skin, she closed her hand over it again....a strange light emitting from between her fingers and when she opened her closed fist, the petal was gone and in its place was a pure white feather....it hovered in mid-air above her outstretched palm...the wind took the feather, sending it flying into the sky which had suddenly turned dark and ominous. Rinoa could see a figure in the clouds....a woman....a dark woman....moving in the clouds....they swirled and she could see a sliver light glinting in the dark sky...it fell to earth, landing just in front of her.....Rinoa looked around...the field had disappeared....she was in a desert, devoid of any life at all...and in the cracked earth not far from where she stood was a gunblade buried in the ground.....it had a lion engraved on it, breathing fire........her dream self gasped........slipping ever into darkness....she could remember no more.....

When Selphie shook her awake at 6 o'clock in the morning it seemed to Rinoa that she'd hardly gotten any sleep at all. Mornings were not her thing. She shuffled into the bathroom to change. Cleaning herself up, she looked at her reflection in the mirror. The events of the last few days had changed everything for her. Not that she didn't welcome change, but it was so hard to get used to it when it first happened. She was afraid and a bit sad, but also hopeful. This was likely to be the beginning of a great adventure. She'd never been out of Galbadia before, and it was exciting to think about how different Balamb must be. 

It reminded her of better times when she lived at home with her father, while her mother was still alive. When they'd go on trips together, driving into strange towns on their way to where ever they were going. She used to think about all the people that lived in the towns she'd just pass through. How they lived their lives.....What they did day to day....What it must be like to live there....For her the town was just another stop on a trip, but for them it was home...routine....they knew every corner, and nothing was new to them....but for her every street was a new experience....

Watching the world go by, whether by train or car....it was the same every trip....You're excited because you get to leave and see a whole new world....but at the same time so sad to have to leave your home and everything you know. She remembered how happy she was once the trip was over....glad to be home but sad that the adventure ended and was now only a memory...She missed those times with her father, but then he shut her out....and nothing was the same. She started to cry again, feeling like the world's biggest baby. Glancing at her now puffy face, she quickly splashed it with water and hoped no one would notice. 

She walked out into the living room, where everyone was waiting. Mei had prepared a quick breakfast for all of them and they all sat down once Rinoa had exited the bathroom. They all stared at her as she entered and Rinoa began to feel very self conscious. Everyone else began eating, occasional polite chatter filling the mostly quiet room. Selphie, who was seated next to Rinoa,  noticed the evidence of her breakdown in the bathroom.

"You okay? Your eyes look kinda red..." 

"Yeah, just feeling a little sad about having to leave....Timber's been my home for so long." Rinoa answered, smiling weakly. 

"I know how that feels....I come from Trabia and I had to leave to go to Balamb so I could graduate....I really miss all my friends and family back home....Is this your home town?" Selphie asked, cocking her head as she downed a pancake.

"No....I moved here a few years ago to go to a special high school for gifted students. I graduated a year early, and I liked it here so much that I decided to stay on. Deling City's my home town...but I haven't been back there in years."  

"You don't visit your parents or anything?" 

Rinoa lowered her eyes, "No....me and my father don't get along really well. I think we both know that it's better if we don't....you know, see each other much....It's a really complicated situation, I don't like to talk about it much."

"Oh! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."

Rinoa interrupted her, with a smile on her face, "It's okay....It's just too long a story to tell right now....We'd be here forever if I went into it....Ask me again sometime."

"Not to pry, but what about your mom...You don't get along with her either?"

".......She's....dead...it happened when I was really little....so I don't remember much." 

"Oh...geez...I'm really sorry....Gosh..." Selphie cheeks burned with embarrassment, she'd put her foot in her mouth again.

"S'okay....I don't mind talking about _her_....Like I said, I don't remember very well........" Rinoa said, picking up her necklace she continued, "The ring I keep on this necklace was hers. She was a really tiny lady, so the ring doesn't fit me. I keep it around my neck to remind me of her. It originally belonged to my grandma... it's a family heirloom. Actually, my Mum was kind of famous.... played piano....she was a big years and years ago...I took her last name instead of my father's...I liked it better.  The ring's white gold...."

"Wow! It's really pretty.....", cradling the tiny ring in her hand, she looked up and said apologetically, "I'm sorry if I'm being too nosy..."

"It's no big deal....really. I know I came off a little harsh....but I'm not that scary all the time....I'm sorry for causing a scene and upsetting everyone...." Rinoa said, smiling, her dark eyes twinkling, "That wasn't me yesterday...it was my evil twin...."

Selphie blinked a couple of times, furrowing her brow with confusion, "You have a twin?"

Rinoa eyes widened in disbelief, wondering how a ditz like Selphie could become a SeeD,  "No....it was a joke."

"Don't believe her Selphie...She has a twin. But it's a twisted deformed freak baby that she keeps in a basket. It comes out at night and eats puppies..." Zell chimed in, who'd been listening in the entire time, smiling broadly and making a face.

"OH MY GOD!! Shut UP! OoooOOOO! Don't even talk about killing poor little puppies!! You're so mean! If I could reach you I'd hit you!" Selphie said, scrunching up her face in such a way that she looked like a very angry baby.

"And little bitty fuzzy kittens....."

"SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!"

"It eats 'em tail first.....mewmewmeeaaaaaaggggg...." Zell smiled wickedly, demonstrating graphically how the kitten was to be eaten.

Selphie chucked a strawberry from her waffle at Zell, hitting his arm with a solid squishy smack. Zell threw it back at her, the mushy berry landing right in the middle of her forehead. Quistis gave them the mom look and they stopped before it went too far. Though both had a hard time looking at the other. The sniggering started quietly at first, but soon it couldn't be kept under wraps. Rinoa couldn't stand the pressure any longer, and she was the first to burst into laughter, her lips parting in a wide and beautiful smile. That smile, it was irresistible, looking at it....you could help but join her in her merriment.  The three of them all laughed, so hard it brought tears to their faces, a welcome release from the tension of the day before. The once quiet table had become a raucous gathering, at least between Zell, Selphie and Rinoa. The three of them couldn't help but joke and tease each other, the conversation dissolving into unpredictable giggle fits. Always the mother, Quistis watched them with a disapproving eye, thinking their behavior childish and silly. Squall didn't pay much attention at all, quietly sitting in a corner of the table. He pushed at his food with his fork, not the least bit hungry. He'd gotten very little sleep the night before, and consequently was extremely tired. They quickly finished up breakfast, picking up their things to leave. 

Rinoa gave Mei a hug before she left, "Take care Mei, say good-bye to little Reika for me. Thanks for all your help."

"Not a problem, write to me once you've arrived safely in Balamb, alright?"

"Okay....Bye."

"Be careful, Noa....we're all praying for you."

The party left for the train station, walking through the deserted streets of Timber. They made the train in time, early enough to settle themselves in their cabin for the long trip to East Academy Station. The cabin they'd been seated in wasn't as good as the one arranged for them from the Garden. It was much smaller, and with the larger group it made for a very cramped trip. It would take around a week to arrive at the station, perhaps more. The trip would have been significantly shorter if they could've taken the SeeD bullet train, but circumstances being what they were. Rinoa, Zell and Selphie all sat together on one side, while Quistis and Squall sat on the other. After a small wait the train began to move off, going faster and faster, the lovely forests of Timber whooshing past the window in a blur. 


	11. Mixed Emotions

Everyone dug in for the long ride, finding things to keep themselves busy. Selphie amused herself with the scenery, singing softly to herself as she watched the world go by. Rinoa and Zell pulled out their card collections, going over which ones they had and which ones they didn't. Quistis found a magazine in the pocket on her seat and skimmed through the articles. Squall closed his eyes and fell asleep, to make up for the night before. He woke up with a start around an hour later, when a sudden sound broke the silence of his world. A rather rowdy game of cards had ensued while he had slept. Somehow Rinoa had roped Quistis into a game with her and Zell. The normally demure and dignified Quistis found herself enjoying being loud and rowdy with Rinoa and Zell. Quistis won the game, completely trouncing Rinoa and Zell. 

Apparently Rinoa could make friends with almost anyone....almost. After the game she flitted around like a butterfly, engaging everyone in some kind of involved discussion. Most obviously leaving Squall out of the loop. He sullenly started out the window, not caring a bit if she decided to talk to him, all the better if she didn't.

 Time wore on,  Zell fell asleep, Quistis went back to reading and Selphie, as always stared out the window, singing quietly to herself. Rinoa got bored and with nothing else to do, plopped over in the empty seat next to Squall. She had avoided him most of the morning because he looked so tired and she didn't want to bug him. Besides, even though they'd made up the night before, there was an uncomfortable silence between them. A terrible gap, that Rinoa hoped she could bridge.  He seemed to be more awake now, and perhaps in the mood to talk.....or something approaching it. 

Rinoa furrowed her brow, _he always looks so unhappy. _She was bound and determined to get him to talk, and maybe even smile, if she was lucky. 

She smiled and tapped his shoulder to get his attention, "Hey, sad little clown...What's up?" A bit too predictably, he didn't answer....not answering or acknowledging people was his thing, or at least that's what Rinoa figured. Trying another tactic, she continued, "Look into my eyes...NOW SLEEEEEPP.....you want to talk with me...you will make pleasant conversation, maybe even enjoy yourself....hypnotized yet?" He sighed deeply, a look of annoyance flickering across  his face. She giggled, "Guess not....damn...and I was so close too."

Crossing his arms, he snapped angrily, "Don't you ever go away?" 

"Nope....Don't you ever smile?" a sparkle of mischief in her eyes, "I've been debating, is that stick up your ass something you were born with or was it a later addition..."

"Just leave me alone..." 

 "Sorry...can't....I'm contractually obligated to annoy you until you talk to me...." She stopped for a moment, noticing the glint of silver on his hand. It had occurred to her that in the short time she knew him he'd never removed his gloves, until now, curious,  "Nice ring...where'd you get it?"

"None of your business..." he said,  rolling his eyes and tapping his foot impatiently. Cursing himself inwardly, it had been stuffy inside the car, so he'd removed his gloves and his coat. 

His coat and gloves were physical barriers that he'd put up, removing him from the rest of the world. He couldn't touch or feel with them on, and foolishly he took them off to be more comfortable. Now she had a lead in to engage him in pointless conversation. What was it about her that allowed her to break into his private world like that?  Was it just her own disregard for personal boundaries or something more? Whatever  it was it made him uncomfortable and he scowled at her, hoping to intimidate her into silence as he'd done before to countless other people. She only smiled wider, his ire only seemed to amuse her. 

"Woof!..... Can I see it?" 

"Will you leave me alone if I let you?'

"Maybe....hope springs eternal." 

He took off his ring and handed it to her. She turned it around and around in her hands, noticing an inscription on the inside of the band. Rinoa traced the grooves of the engraving with her finger. She looked up, her face turning serious and asked, "Hey, Where were you born?"

"Why?"

"Well, the inscription inside your ring...it's Old Galbadian..." 

"Old Galbadian? As opposed to NEW Galbadian...." he replied, lifting an eyebrow. 

"Yeah, sure laugh at my culture.....it's the language the ancient Galbadians once spoke. It's rarely used today...Actually, it's never used, except by really old people who like to say rude things without consequences.....Though I think its still spoken exclusively in Winhill, but that's about it.....It's a dying language, most people now only speak standard....My Grandma taught me some when I was little, and I studied a little at school... It's been awhile but I think I can translate...if you want me to."

"Knock yourself out..." Squall couldn't care less, at this point he'd already zoned out and was just waiting for her to shut up. 

She looked at the inscription, pondering it for a moment before beginning, "Love bears all things, believes all things, ...h-hopes all things....it endures...Love never fails......I am yours, now and always.....Wow!  Here you go..." she said, handing it back to him, "So, where _were_ you born?" 

"I thought you said you'd leave me alone?!"

"I lied, answer my question..." She said, with an impish smile.  

Sighing shakily in frustration, he answered through gritted teeth, "Honestly, I don't know...I have no family, and no home that I remember. Satisfied?" 

"I'm sorry....So....When did you get the ring?....the inscription, seems awful personal, not like something you'd just buy at a shop. Was it from your family?"  

"No....it was a gift....." he stopped, the memory overwhelming him to a point that he was afraid she could see his emotion boiling to the surface.  

 ".....Sounds like it was a little bittersweet....they left, didn't they? After giving it to you..........." Rinoa looked at him contemplatively, life suddenly draining from her face, tears brimming. "Before my mom died, she gave her ring to me...... it was like she knew.... I barely even remember what she looks like, much less what kind of person she was....I guess it's a little easier for me, though.....At least I have old photos, and relatives that can help me remember. Do you remember anything about your parents?"

 "No..." 

"Then I guess we have something in common. Whoda thunk?", rubbing her eyes and falling silent for a moment. She twisted a lock of hair around her finger and began again, "Ever wonder why life deals you the cards it did?  I think about all the things that've happened in my life. If only one or two things happened differently, I wonder if my life would've turned out the same.......What's it like in Balamb?"

"Very sunny and warm, there's lots of beaches...."

"Can I ask you a question?"

"No."

"At that party we went to....Why'd you dance with me?" 

 "Because you forced me to."

Rinoa twirled her hair absently around her finger, "But....if you really didn't want to dance...how come you did? I didn't have a gun to your head...you could've said no...or something."

"I tried...but you wouldn't leave me alone...." looking at her with confusion. _What was she getting at anyway_?

"Well, you didn't try real hard.....I mean, if you really didn't want to dance, when I pulled you back...you could've just kept walking.....You're much bigger and stronger than I am. If you really wanted to go, you could've..."

He sighed, "What do you want? You want me to admit I wanted to dance with you? Fine...If it'll make you sleep better at night, I wanted to dance with you. _Now _will you leave me alone?"

For once, it was Rinoa who didn't answer. Just as she was an enigma to him...he was an enigma to her. His words and his actions never agreed...he'd reach out to her, only to tell her to leave him alone. The way he'd looked at her the night before, like he was begging her to help him. Asking her to release him from his pain...Then today, he was all cold and impatient....constantly pushing her away. It befuddled her, she just couldn't understand why he chose to exist that way...._oh to hell with it_, she thought, throwing caution to the wind for a moment. She stared at him, her eyes searching him out....trying to see into the deepest part of him. 

"Stop it..." he said, his voice flatly even.

"Stop what?"

"Staring, it's very annoying."

"Jeez....I was only..."

"I'm tired of you....just leave me alone already......" 

_That tears it_....Rinoa fumed, inwardly declaring war, "GOD! I don't know why I even tried with you!!" 

"Neither do I." He replied calmly. 

"And here I thought Seifer was the biggest asshole I've ever met....but he _PALES _in comparison to you...."

"Whatever. Not my fault you're a bad judge of character. But then again, I guess I should expect that kind of stupidity from one of Seifer's bimbos.... Did he leave you because you were such a clingy harpy?" Squall paused for effect, hoping this would be the final deterrent to talking to him. She didn't speak, he could see the anger seething in her eyes, "What? Hit a nerve? Not so funny when it's your own personal pain being exploited, isn't it? " 

Anger had momentarily numbed all thought for her, but slowly she came back,  "Oh! I didn't know emotionally stunted robots _felt _pain....and all this time there was a human heart inside that metallic shell of yours! Who knew?!"  She gave a twist of the knife to the last few words. A muscle in his jaw twitched and she smiled sweetly, satisfied that she'd found a sore spot. 

How could she know how much that last insult hurt him? Students at Balamb had given him that nickname behind his back, they thought he didn't know but he did. It hurt, he pretended not to care, but it still hurt to be treated like he had no feelings. He had them, they were just guarded. Why couldn't people just leave him alone?

".....Whatever." another twitch. 

Rinoa went in for the kill, "I get it....I finally get you. You sit there and pretend not to care. Building up a little wall to keep us all out, all so you won't get hurt. You play the part of the sad loner and try to act like you're so brave, that you can do anything on your own. Pretending like you don't need anyone, but really you're just scared. You're a coward and a sad excuse for a leader. You don't care about your teammates....The only person you give a shit about is yourself, and that's just pathetic. And I can't wait for the day when you realize what you've lost by being such an asshole....When you're all alone, I'll be there....laughing my ass off. Because, unlike you, I understand how important friendship is.....hell, even _Seifer_ had friends....." Rinoa glared at him, judging his reaction carefully. 

That one got him. His entire body froze, his face pinched and stiff with anger. Steely eyes gazing into the distance, betraying the inner emotional turmoil. He pursed his lips, not wanting to let that insult go by without a retort. Nothing came, his mind groped for ammo, but came up with a big fat blank. Breathing heavily, he picked up his things and moved away from her. Pulling on his gloves and jacket as he relocated in the seat across from her, next to Zell, who was snoring noisily. Zell moaned, shifting positions; his body slumping against Squall for support. He closed his eyes in sheer frustration. Silently wishing this ride from hell to end. Squall glanced at Rinoa, who smiled angelically. She stretched out her legs and sighed contentedly. He knew she'd won at that instant. Somehow, she always got the upper hand, and he had no idea how or why. 

"If that's all it took to get your fat ass to move, I shoulda done this sooner...." she said, the same satisfied smile on her face, "...More room for me!! Boy am I sleepy...." She fake-yawned, propping the back of her  head up with her hands. Rinoa closed her eyes in utter contentment. 

He felt his face twitch again, she knew she won and it didn't even matter. The whole argument had meant nothing to her. Not to say that he hadn't hurt her, but it didn't have the desired effect of her wanting to leave him alone. She just didn't care. Soon fake sleep had become real sleep, Rinoa drifting off happily into dream land. While he sat there with Zell drooling all over him, his pride still stinging like an open wound. The thing that galled him the most... was an hour later he thought of a really great comeback. 

He looked out the window, watching the scenery change from the deep forests of Timber, to the more barren landscapes surrounding East Academy and Galbadia Garden. The sun and the moon circled 'round the sky, and sooner than any of them could have guessed, they'd arrived at their destination. 

The party exited the train, briefly entering East Academy to pick up a few essentials before they had to walk to Galbadia Garden. All of them we happy to be off the train, and stretched their legs until they were ready to leave. An entire week on a cramped train cabin, with few stops, was not the worst way to spend one's time but hardly what anyone would call fun. Squall in particular felt an overwhelming sense of relief as he stepped off the train and onto the platform. If he was less reserved he might have acted as Zell had, singing and dancing like a crazy person, frightening strangers. Quistis reigned him in and got everyone focused on leaving the station as quickly and quietly as possible. A brief breakfast was had and they were off. They couldn't afford the paper trail it would take to rent a car, so they had to settle with walking. It was around eleven in the morning, and Selphie calculated that at a brisk pace it would take around two hours, more or less,  to get to Galbadia Garden.  They left East Academy, walking northwest to get to Garden.

 Quistis, who'd bought a map, lead the way. Her pace was more than brisk and what could have been a pleasant stroll became a military style death march. Selphie was the loudest complainer, whining every five minutes, asking when they'd be there. It was enough to drive Quistis to kill. She was in no mood to be trifled with. When Quistis had arrived and found out that Rinoa was the girl Squall had danced with....she was more than a little happy that they had a falling out. Unfortunately, they seemed to have made up and she had to listen to them the entire ride to the station. It really burned her that he was so considerate of Rinoa...._Ooo_..._it's_ _Ancient Galbadian, let me translate_... _blah_.. _blah_... _blah_......_I'm so annoying and cute_...It was enough to make her puke. He'd talked to Rinoa for longer and about more of his life than he EVER did with her. Hell, he was even more civil with Rinoa than he was with her. His blow up with Rinoa didn't have half the vitriol and venom that his fight with her had. What made it even worse, was she knew she wasn't supposed to feel this way. He was her student, she was his superior and her feelings were getting in the way of her doing her job. And it didn't help that Rinoa was really funny and sweet. If she'd been just a little brattier, just a little too nice, maybe Quistis could find an excuse to totally and completely hate her. It was also pretty funny to watch her get under Squall's skin.... and she had really told him off, laying into him in a way Quistis could only dream of. Try as she might to make Rinoa a complete bitch, she couldn't, though she desperately wanted to. 

"Quistissssssssssss.....I'm TIRED!! Are we there yet!?" Selphie howled, stumbling way behind everyone else, "Can't we slow down?"

"I know you're tired, NO...we can't slow down and we'll get there when we get there....." Quistis hollered back. 

"That's like the fifth time she's said that....I'd like to know when you're going to stop asking." Zell snorted, turning to make a face at Selphie.

"Shut up! If I wasn't so tired, I'd beat the crap out of you!"

"That's what you said this morning! I'm still waiting! NYAH!" 

Selphie scowled and rushed Zell, who ran away at top speed. Selphie shouting as she ran, "COME BACK HERE! I'M GONNA KICK YOUR BUTT!"

"Not if you can't catch me!" 

"YOU CAN'T RUN FOREVER!" 

They screamed and gibbered like a pair of monkeys, winding their way around the small path the rest of the team was walking on. 

"Knock it off you two!" Quistis begged, without success. 

Zell tripped over a bramble, allowing Selphie to catch him. She pounded his arm with both fists. Shrinking back, Zell cried, "OW!OW! OOOooo, it tickles! Stop IT!"  He grabbed a hold of her, tickling her sides until she gave up, giggling like crazy. Smiling, he added, "That's what happens when you mess with the master."

"The master is gonna get left behind if he don't move his ass!" Rinoa shouted, sticking her tongue out. 

"OUCH! You too! Man, I never get the breaks!" Zell said, jogging back up with Selphie to rejoin the others, "I wonder what Galbadia Garden is like?"

"You know, I bet it'd be just like every other Garden. It's the same thing with most schools....every single private school I was sent to was the same....I can't imagine military schools like the Garden would be much different." 

"How many schools have you gone to?" Zell asked.

"Well, When I was younger I was a bit of a bad girl....I think I was thrown out of at least six different schools for girls.....Until Timber's Academy of Fine Arts." 

"What'd you study?" Quistis piped up, wondering what a girl like Rinoa would study. 

"My major was music, and I minored in languages, Esthar and of course Ancient Galbadian. I like the old, dead languages...they're the most fun, cus nobody else speaks them!" 

"Really? WOW! That is so cool.....what instrument did you study?" Zell asked enthusiastically, completely impressed.

"Piano, guitar, and violin.....my main focus was vocal though." 

"NO WAY! Hey, I play a little guitar...we'll have to jam sometime!" Zell said, jumping up and down excitedly. 

"Sure, though I don't have my own anymore...." Rinoa said, laughing. 

"No problem....I got a couple extra." 

"Sweet! It's a plan....So once we get to Galbadia Garden, How do we get back to Balamb?" Rinoa inquired. 

"Well, first we'll have to call Balamb from Galbadia.......Then we talk with Galbadia's headmaster to arrange for transport." Quistis said,  "What are you going to do once you get to Balamb?"

"I'm not sure....I figure something'll pop up along the way. I'm just playing it by ear." Rinoa replied, shrugging her shoulders. 

"You mean, you have no plan?" Quistis asked, absolutely astonished. 

"Nope."

"But, you don't even know anyone in Balamb. How are you going to live, where will you stay?" 

"I know you all....Besides.... It'll all work out. It always does. Life takes care of itself.....why worry." Rinoa said, smiling wistfully, "The future is made to be lived, not planned. HEY! I think I can see it from here....look....there it is!"

"What?" Zell asked, squinting.

"Galbadia Garden....and it's really close! THANK GOODNESS!" Selphie shouted, starting to run, "Hey! Zell! Rinoa! RACE YOU!" 

Zell looked at Rinoa, "....We can't let her win...we'll never hear the end of it."

"Yeah...let's go! NO FAIR! YOU GOT A HEAD START!!" Rinoa called after Selphie, running as she went. 

Zell and Rinoa took off running as fast as they could, leaving Squall and Quistis to walk by themselves. Squall had been even more reserved and quiet than he normally was. He'd barely made a noise since they'd left the train, not that he _ever_ made much noise. Quistis was frankly a little worried for him, a state of mind she seemed to be in constantly. Her earlier frustration with her situation was gone, at least for the moment. Rinoa had really affected Squall's personality, and Quistis was unsure if it was positive or negative. He'd become more sullen and introspective, even more than usual.

"Interesting girl....hope she knows what she's in for..." Quistis said.

Squall didn't say anything, he looked up, watching Rinoa and the others fading figures charging down the path towards Galbadia Garden. He wished he could be so carefree. So much responsibility lay on his shoulders...he couldn't take the weight and yet he couldn't ask for help. He didn't know how...didn't know what he should do to relieve the pressure he felt pushing at him from all sides. _God, she was right_..._I can't even think for myself_....He pushed down his feelings, suppressing his emotions was the only thing he knew to do.

Eventually, Squall and Quistis found their way to the front gates of Galbadia Garden. It was far larger than Balamb, its hulking red facade looming over them in the afternoon light. Just inside, Rinoa, Zell and Selphie were resting on a hill, throwing handfuls of grass at each other, waiting for them to arrive. The reunited group walked into Galbadia Garden's entrance, past a group of students practicing on mobile hover units. Quistis took charge again, and found out where they had to go and who they had to talk to. She was told they were to wait in the guests lounge for a representative of Galbadia Garden to speak with them personally. A female cadet led them to the lounge, where lunch had been set out for them. They ate quietly, while waiting for this mysterious representative to appear.  Finally the silver doors whooshed open and a short, bald man stepped in the room.

"Hello, I'm Moby, Headmaster Martine's assistant.  I've been sent to debrief you on your next mission."

Quistis looked at him, "What?......Excuse me, I wasn't aware of being assigned to any mission. We don't come from this Garden. We're from Balamb....all we want is transport home. I think there must be some mistake."

"No....There's no mistake....I know you're not from Galbadia....However, your headmaster and ours have agreed to work jointly on this next mission. Your headmaster recommended the of four of you to assist us." Moby answered mildly, stopping to look at Rinoa with confusion, "You probably haven't heard, but President Deling has made a rather startling announcement. He's appointed a sorceress as his Chief Ambassador... Not much is known about her and everyone's afraid that he might attempt to make a repeat of the sorceress wars...We only have her name, Edea. We don't even know what kind of power she has and how much... However, our sources inside Deling's government have confirmed that their intent is hostile. Once the sorceress becomes Chief Ambassador, they're planning some kind of attack. We're not sure what though." 

"You've got to be kidding!" Quistis exclaimed, "So what do they want us to do about it?"

"Well, we're going to try to assassinate her before they can put her plans into motion. We've chosen our champion sharpshooter to go to Deling City and kill the sorceress....but, another small team of SeeDs is needed to help get the sorceress in place. We'd also like a dual control of sorts, in case he misses. That's where you all come in."

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but....what about Balamb....We had some trouble in Timber and we're all worried they might retaliate." Zell asked, shifting nervously from foot to foot.

"Yes..." Moby said, furrowing his brow, "The _official _word is no action will be taken against Balamb Garden, as the West Galbadian government understands it was an independent act of aggression by an unstable individual. Besides, the rogue student who attacked the president was captured and has already been executed."

The entire room went silent for a moment, their minds unwilling to fully comprehend what they'd heard. Seifer had been caught and was already executed.... 

"Oh, my god..." Quistis gasped.

"I understand this must be quite a shock to you all...but we have such little time. I hate to be so brusque, but if I could continue?" Moby said, his voice respectfully quiet, stopping to look around and beginning again, "You'll leave as soon as possible, you have until fifteen hundred, assemble back here and meet the sniper. From there you'll catch the first train to Deling City and meet up with an associate of ours in the military.  Go to this address...." handing a slip of paper to Quistis, "...our contact there will be able to help you. They'll explain the full details of the mission. Good luck....Take as much time as you need, but please be quick."

Moby saluted and left the still stunned room, no one moving until the doors closed behind him. 

"I can't believe it...." Quistis breathed, "God....I...I don't know how to react....He was such a jerk and the worst student... but...he didn't deserve this....he was one of our own."

"Well, he got what he asked for...I don't feel a bit sorry for him." Zell said, putting his hands behind his head, "You reap what you sow."

"I didn't know him that well...." Selphie chimed in, "but I have to agree with Quistis....he might have been a jerk but he was one of us. I wish there was more we could've done."

Rinoa looked around, tears brimming in her eyes, "How can you all be so cold....you talk about him like he's not even human....like he's a thing to be gossiped about and nothing more. He was a friend and above all else, another human being deserving of compassion...." She was unable to continue and turned away, sitting on the floor with her arms around her knees, crying softly. 

Squall listened in, they kept talking about it....Seifer was this....Seifer did that....talking like they really knew him, but did they?...The way they'd talked about him, like he was a character, not another human being....they acted like Seifer wasn't even worth their concern or compassion. How could they be that cold....is that what all their training taught them to do? To devalue human life....They called _him_ cold...indifferent  He knew the rumors....he heard the way people talked when they thought he wasn't listening....What would they say if he died right now....Squall was this...and that...talking about him in the past tense...so easily forgetting who he really was and putting together a skewed picture of who they thought he was. It made him so angry..._she was right_...._good god she was right_........_I won't have them talk about me like that_...._judging me _...._making assumptions for why I act the way I do_....

His emotions overwhelming him, he exploded,  "I WON'T HAVE IT!" Storming out of the room, blindly running down the corridors of Galbadia Garden. He ran and ran, almost knocking over a pair of students walking the halls. They shouted after him but he kept going; barreling down the narrow hallways, taking any corner that suited him. He stopped breathlessly in an open air garden near the middle of the school. Squall collapsed on one of the grassy hills, covering his face with his hands. 

After Squall ran out of the meeting room, everyone, including Rinoa, split up and began to search for him. All of them agreeing to meet at the conference room in a half hour, even if they didn't find him. Rounding a corner, Quistis ran headlong into another student.

"Jeez I'm sorry I.....Raijin? What're you doing here?" Quistis looked at him quizzically, jumping a little when Fujin appeared behind him. 

"Lookin' fer Seifer.....What're _you _doin' here?" 

"Long story.....Actually, I'm looking for Squall. We're supposed to leave and he took off. Have you seen him?"

"THAT WAY." Fujin replied, pointing at the hallway to the left of Quistis, "SEIFER, SEEN?"

Quistis bit her lip, squirming uncomfortably, "I don't know how to tell you this.....Seifer.....he.....He's dead. After he threatened Deling's life, they caught him and executed him. I'm so sorry....." She trailed off, finding it hard to look into the siblings startled eyes.

"LIES! WRONG! SEIFER ALIVE!!" a single tear slipped down Fuijin's eye. She swiped at it, and turned around to compose herself. 

Raijin thought for a moment, something he rarely did. "Ya know.....It's not that I think you're lyin' Professor Trepe....but I think somethin' ain't right 'bout all this. Seifer wouldn't go out like that, ya know. I think we still gotta keep lookin' for him."

_What you'll find is his grave_ Quistis thought, but she said nothing. Instead she nodded, smiling sympathetically, "Suit yourself. Thanks for the help......be careful, okay?" 

The siblings nodded, waving good-bye as Quistis ran down the hallway they'd pointed her to. 


	12. Through Twilight Gently

Rinoa wondered if they purposely built the Gardens with the intent of getting people lost. She stumbled around, asking annoyed students if they'd seen a guy in black running around. No one had. Rinoa had given up by the time she made it to a rather pleasant garden. _Ooo! A garden inside a Garden_, the thought made her giggle, helping her to shed her somber mood. It had lovely tree covered walkways that winded through the well-kept hedges and beds. Deciding that if she couldn't find Squall, at least she'd have a nice walk, Rinoa strolled lazily through the garden. Occasionally she'd stop to look at one of the tiny placards that were placed in front of various specimen of flora. She laughed at some of the funny scientific names given to common plants...it made them seem so much more than they really were. She kept walking, taking in the sights of the tranquil garden within a Garden. Feeling much better now that she was away from everyone else for a bit. Sometimes being alone left to hear the music of your own thoughts was a good thing. She looked around and in the afternoon sun and noticed a slumped figure in black sitting on a small hill. _Squall_...

She walked up to him, "Funny how when you're not looking for something you find it...Let's go...I'm sure everybody's worried about you, and that guy Moby was real keen on us leaving and all...."

His face was covered by his hands; slowly he removed them and looked up at her. Storm clouded eyes stared back at her, ringed in red. _Had he been crying_?? She thought, shaking it away, maybe he did, maybe he didn't. That wasn't the point. He needed a real friend and she sensed that, as nice as the others were, they weren't exactly pillars of sensitivity. _Not like I am either, but you gotta take what you can get_....She wasn't sure what the relationship between Squall and Seifer had been. Squall's reaction to Seifer's name hadn't been exactly sunny.  Yet what she saw here was genuine grief..._Maybe he sees a little bit of himself in Seifer. Like if given the chance, Squall might be in Seifer's position_..... They sat together silently, while Squall got himself under control. 

"Ready?" Rinoa asked, looking at him with a mixture of compassion and concern. 

He nodded and then paused, narrowing his eyes suspiciously at her,  "Why are you being so nice? I didn't ask for your concern.... why do you think I want it?"

She smiled and as she got up, "Number one...it's called common courtesy.... Number two...I'm just a messenger...so don't go getting the wrong idea. We should go." 

He looked at her with confusion, _I don't get you_, that's what he wanted to say but he held it back. He didn't want to admit that somehow she knew him better than he knew her. Yet again, she won...even if they weren't arguing. Rinoa moved off, glancing back to make sure that he was following as she headed inside the building. 

The door to the conference room swished open on their friends, all a little astonished at who Squall showed up with. Quistis had about a hundred questions to ask Squall...but they all left her mind as she watched Rinoa and Squall enter the meeting room. She'd never noticed it before, but they ...they clicked...they looked so good...so right. Like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, fitted perfectly together. Quistis suddenly felt very angry and jealous. There were four of them looking for Squall...how was it that she was the one to find him? It wasn't fair. Dammit, it wasn't fair at all. So many years she'd pined, hoped, dreamt of a moment like that with him. Why her of all people? It was the last straw, Rinoa was nice and sweet but she was so naive. Like a child, she walked through life with no plan, never seeing danger until it bit her on the ass. How was it she could worm her way into his heart? What magical power did Rinoa have that she lacked? She hated the way he looked at Rinoa.... mooning over her like some lovesick dog. Her ride was over; Quistis wouldn't let her competition get any further. This new mission was a perfect excuse, as a civilian Rinoa couldn't accompany them_.  I'm doing this because she'd get in the way_...._ not because I'm jealous_. Quistis tried to tell herself, but even she didn't really believe it. 

"Where have you two been? We've been waiting here forever!!" 

"I just found him..." Rinoa answered firmly, narrowing her eyes. Sensing the edge of anger in Quistis's demeanor. 

"Really..." Quistis replied, her lips pursed, "Squall....could you wait here with Selphie and Zell...I need to talk with Rinoa a minute."

"That's alright.... Anything you have to say to me, you can say in front of everyone.... I don't mind." Rinoa said, taking Quistis's challenge head on. She knew what Quistis was doing...._ She wants to cut me out_. Quistis was going to try and leave her behind. And she couldn't help but feel that there was also some kind of ulterior motive behind Quistis's actions.

"It'd be more appropriate if we speak in private..." Quistis said, stalking away from the group, with Rinoa trailing behind her. 

Quistis lead her into a small, unoccupied classroom, banks of computers and desks surrounding them. 

"What's this all about?" 

"I've appreciated what you've done for us...however, I have to give you some bad news.... You won't be coming with us to Deling City. Our upcoming mission doesn't concern you and I've been told to insist that you stay here. Transport has been arranged..."  

"Wait...just hold on one second." Rinoa interrupted, " Listen...I don't know who lit the fuse on your tampon, but cut the crap. We had a deal. You said I could come with...So what's the story?"

Quistis stared at Rinoa, her eyes narrowing in contempt, "This mission is very important and as a Garden representative I can't have you getting in our way. You're just a civilian...and you'd be nothing but a burden to us...."

"You can't do that. I have a contract..."

 Quistis cursed, she'd forgotten the contract, but she never let it show, "This isn't a stupid game...People are going to get hurt..." 

"You think I don't know that...I've seen more human suffering than you or any of your SeeDs EVER have...You people breeze in and then walk out when the job is done or the money runs out...I've been there to pick up the pieces afterwards..." Rinoa shouted, shaking with emotion, "I don't have to sit here and listen to this BULLSHIT.........."

With that, she turned tail and began to stalk away. Rage, pure and deep...was all the young girl felt as Quistis grabbed her slim wrist from behind.  The minute flesh touched flesh; Quistis felt a surge of electricity auger from Rinoa to her arm and through her body. Blue eyes widened, every muscle in her body twitching with unbearable pain. Rinoa turned around slowly, her eyes glazed over, no longer their normal dark brown, but milky white... the eyes of a blind man, unseeing... Invisible hands shoved Quistis back, throwing her to the floor roughly. Every computer screen flickered on for a moment, glowing bright white before they exploded. 

Quistis screamed, covering her head, waiting as wisps of smoke belched from the ruined computers. She opened one eye, then the other, looking around cautiously. Nothing happened. Getting up slowly, she checked herself. Nothing was out of place, though her arm pricked with pain. Quistis rolled up her sleeve; the skin was pink and raw. It wasn't serious, nothing a good moisturizer and some bandages couldn't fix. For that, she knew she was lucky. 

Rolling down her sleeve, she noticed the rumpled figure prone on the floor. _Rinoa_... The young woman lay there as if dead, her eyes closed, face ashen. Quistis bent down carefully, using every ounce of courage to examine her. God knows she didn't want to illicit another attack, her luck wasn't that good. Pressing a newly gloved hand Rinoa's neck, Quistis assessed her condition with trepidation. Her vitals were fine, but a thought and a worry nagged in Quistis's mind. Brushing dark hair from Rinoa's eyes, pity and guilt overtook Quistis.

"What are you?" 

The clock on the wall ticked by ever so slowly, each hand seeming to linger on every new number longer. The room was silent; no one seemed to know what to talk about. It had been a pretty crappy day, all in all. What was there worth talking about? Even the thought of practicing his katas seemed unappealing. Zell sat on the overstuffed couch inside the lounge. Waiting for the sharpshooter, waiting for Quistis and Rinoa to get done with their "meeting".  Waiting.....Waiting....Waiting. God how he loathed it. Some had suggested he had A.D.D., and perhaps he ought to be medicated. That was grounds for an automatic flip of the bird in Zell's book. Just because he didn't like to sit around with his thumbs up his arse, didn't mean he needed to be doped up. So there he sat, head in hand.... staring at the clock, just daring it to go faster. The doors whooshed open, and Zell's heart leapt. Finally an end to the waiting. His heart sunk, there stood Quistis, Rinoa in her arms, looking very sickly and pale. 

"Zell.... could you help me please?" Quistis asked, annoyed.

He rushed over, helping Quistis bear her over to one of the couches.  Zell looked down at his friend with concern. His mood lightening as she opened her dark eyes. She looked around groggily, her vision was fuzzy, and she felt so tired. Her lips moved, trying to ask what had happened to her. Zell quieted her immediately.

"What happened?" he asked, brow furrowed. 

Quistis looked down, liding her eyes, "She.... fainted. Her dog was hit by a car. Watts called earlier......he's..... fine, but in the animal hospital. I didn't get a chance to tell her.....She heard he was hit and...." She gestured to Rinoa resting on the couch. 

"Hmmm....." 

Zell nodded, looking at Quistis, wondering if he should believe such a ridiculous story. He knew from past experience that it was better not to pry. 

Quistis stood, turning her back to Zell, "We should get going.....has the sharpshooter arrived?"

"No. He's late....."

"We can't wait for him. We'll just have to hook up in Deling...... Squall, you're the strongest, take Rinoa.....let's go."

Without further word, Quistis strode out of the conference room, her mind troubled. Squall picked up Rinoa's limp form gently, his face stony and unreadable. He was just as suspicious of Quistis as Zell. It wasn't so much the story, as the manner of telling. It just seemed....._wrong_. Besides the fact that it was unlike Quistis to not follow orders. They were told to wait for the sharpshooter, even if he was late. Going without him or her was just plain stupid.  _Something's very, very wrong_.....The SeeDs walked out into the waning afternoon, heading directly for the main gates as they exited. 

Selphie too was bothered by the decision not to wait, "Trepe Sempai, umm.... about the sharpshooter. Shouldn't we at least stop in and have them make an announcement or... something...Maybe we could look for him?"

Quistis inhaled deeply, letting out a very long sigh, but before she could even begin to chastise the young SeeD, she was interrupted.

"Who y'all lookin' for?" a voice drawled languidly from behind. 

Quistis turned to see a very tall young man wearing a tan cowboy hat, standing cockily behind her. He tipped the hat backward to reveal his face, which was ruggedly handsome. He had long auburn hair that was tied back into a loose ponytail. The stranger looked at the three of them with his soft denim blue eyes and smiled.....it was the most disarming smile any of them had seen. 

"Um.... We're from Balamb...We're looking for a..." Quistis began.

"A champion sharpshooter.... best in all three Gardens.... four time blue ribbon winner in Nationals.... two time gold medal winner in World.... That'd be me.... Irvine Kinneas.... at your service, pretty lady." He said, smiling like a movie star and tipping his hat forward genially.   

"Ummmmm....YAH.....Ooookay..... Well...now that we've found you, I guess we can go.." Quistis rolled her eyes, she'd dealt with this type before and lines like that never ceased to annoy her. 

"Seems like y'all need some help.... Mind if I step in?" He asked, scooping up Rinoa into his arms. 

Squall gave him a dirty look, reluctantly surrendering the job of carrying his charge to an overly friendly stranger.  Zell scowled at the newcomer as well, he'd never liked "ladies men", and to him they were nothing but cocky bastards. He disliked him even more, when he saw Selphie giving the sharpshooter the eye. 

"Friggin' cowboy...." Zell mumbled unhappily 

As sun started to sink into the sky, Irvine carried Rinoa in his arms as the rest of the group trailed behind him. All uncertain of the swaggering stranger, wondering if he was really that good, or if he was just all talk. This motley crew traipsed through the late afternoon light; golden sunshine fading quickly as day slowly became night. Filmmakers had always called it the magic hour, that strange time in the early morning or late day when the sky blossoms from light blue to lavender. None of the hard edge of full daylight nor the deep mystery of night, the world softens at twilight. The in-between time. At that moment, this small band of children lay in this time, walking through it, towards night. 

They arrived at the station without incident. Quistis procured their tickets, and they all entered the train.  Her fit of jealously had subsided.  There was a feeling deep inside, that it didn't matter what she did. She had seen the small flicker of concern over Squall's face when she'd entered the conference room with Rinoa. That flicker was enough to tell her she'd already lost. It didn't even matter that he'd watched over her on the drive back to East Academy Station, while Zell administered first aid. She mulled over what had happened. Her mind uneasy at what had transpired. From the information that she had, Rinoa hadn't junctioned any G.F.s. It was against Garden regulation to issue G.F.s to non-personnel, and she was sure that Squall wouldn't have broken protocol to give her one. That left Quistis with only one other option. Spontaneous Magical Outburst, to the layman, using magic without a junction.....the first sign that one possessed the Gift. 

When Quistis was younger she used to read all sorts of books on the paranormal. "The Gift" was a term used to refer to those who naturally were able to use magic and other paranormal abilities without the aid of junctioning Guardian Forces. Some called it the curse, as it literally marked the person as a sorceress. There were a lot of theories about the cause of this gift. Only women were born with it, but no one was quite sure why. 

The superstitious called it Hyne's curse, citing ancient stories and cryptic prophecies. Hyne was a legendary hell god, who, according to religious text had wreaked havoc over the earth. Quistis sat and thought for a moment, she'd memorized a passage from the Letters of Saint Victor, a tome that dealt with the histories and legends surrounding the sorceress's power. The passage had always stuck with her; the story it entailed was apocryphal at best, yet it had fired her imagination when she was younger. She'd read it so many times that she could recite it by rote, though her memory had always been good. 

_From darkness beyond hell, Hyne did light the heavens on fire, belching foul sickness upon the earth. And from this sickness was birthed the myriad demons, sent to plaque man_. _All existence was ravaged, and the people beat their chests and howled at the heavens to end their plight._

_The heavenly creatures answered, saying unto the people, "We have coming bearing heaven's gift, but with this gift comes a terrible price. You must sacrifice here one son and one daughter. Bear this burden and we will give it to you, will you answer us?" _

_And the people trembled, for none were willing to sacrifice their children. And the great powers that be became saddened and made as if to leave. Then, a young girl did stand up, despite her parent's objections. "Take Me," she said, "I am small, and my parents have many children. I will go so that the world may be saved and they should be spared." With that, another child, a boy, stood and said, "Take me as well. I am not afraid to die, I have no family and no one will miss me. I will die so that others may live." _

_Their parents became afraid, and begged their children to rethink their decision. No words could move them, for they had accepted their fate._

_ The heavenly creatures answered, "Brave words from ones so small. Your faith serves you well. We do not wish to make a sacrifice of you, we only wish for you to take this power and use it to protect your world. But beware, for everything there is a price, though we do not know yet what it may be." _

_The heavens gifted the children, and their children's children, with the power to defeat Hyne.  Using this heavenly gift, they slew the mighty hell god, but with his dying breath he cursed them. Imbuing the girl with a great darkness to balance the light of her gift and making the boy her servant for all time. "For this deed you will be hated and feared by the very people you have saved, never again to spend a day upon this earth in peace." Thus the first sorceress was born into burden._

Quistis had always dismissed the Letters because they had no factual evidence to back them up. For a moment she wondered if they were in part somewhat accurate. Some ancient myths had actually been proven to be based on real events, embellished to make it more entertaining to tell but with kernels of truth mixed in. When she was a kid that would have cut it, but Quistis was now older and wiser. There was nothing in the Letters that could help her, just ancient parables that struggled to make sense of the unexplainable. 

The two schools of thought she'd put the most faith in were more scientific. One believed that the Gift was a genetic trait passed from mother to daughter. Another stated that it was more like a disease or symbiotic parasitic invasion. All of them were theories, nothing more. Because ever since the defeat of Adel, there hadn't been any actual sorceresses to study that anyone knew of. In terms of scientific study, it was on the fringe and few in the scientific community looked on it with anything but contempt. 

The spontaneous use of magic during periods of emotional stress was one of the signs....but Quistis had always taken that kind of stuff with a grain of salt. Those books always tried to make it seem scientifically possible but it was usually just a bunch of bullshit. _SMOs_..._ unexplained coma_...._ prophetic dreams_..._the mark of the sorceress_..._blah blah blah_...She'd read stories about Adel...but she never believed for a moment that she could use magic without junctioning it. She thought it was silly superstitious nonsense that people had created to try and understand why Adel had been so powerful and difficult to defeat.  Sorceress was just a word used to put the fear of the gods into the ignorant. She just figured that Adel was really, really good at using para-magic....._but Rinoa_...._she hadn't even used magic before_...._if that was true, then she didn't have a GF junctioned_........_What if the stories were true?_

There were many legends surrounding sorceresses that were well known. However, it was the fact of the Sorceress War that most people remembered. Most could not forget, certainly not the hundreds of orphans it had left in its wake. It had all started with the premonition of a young sorceress from a remote village in Centra. Her given name had been Lourdes Angelina Adelanto, she had been an exceptionally gifted healer, trained, as most sorceresses were to cure wounds, not make them. 

This was in the days before a sorceress became an image of fear; they were revered as bringers of peace and gentle caregivers. Especially those who studied in the mountains of Centra, who were considered the wisest of all. The majority of sorceresses had gathered to study on this continent, though they were respected, their power evoked envy in those who had nothing comparable. With great study, a sorceress could overcome the darkness within, if she embraced the light she would attain the mark of the sorceress.  With this "mark", it would awaken their gift, bearing a talent that was uniquely their own. 

Lourdes could see the future and potential future, it was so acute she could predict how individual decisions would affect the lines of time as it sped forward. In her vision she foresaw that one Sorceress would become the Ultimecia, a name in Centra's speech meaning the most powerful, the ultimate. Attaining the highest level of power a sorceress could gain, and with this power she would rule the world. Most had dismissed the tiny sorceress, telling her to focus on the here and now. That she only saw a potential future, not an actual future. None could have known what she would grow up to become. 

This vision consumed Lourdes, she was an ambitious girl and lusted after the power and glory she saw in her premonition. A great darkness had filled Lourdes' heart and she began to learn dark magics beyond what was taught by her elders, powerful and forbidden spells that were only used for destruction. With this knowledge she changed, becoming Adel, the dark sorceress, leaving behind Lourdes, the girl she had been. She tapped into a power, beyond time and space, a power so dark and malevolent it couldn't be controlled. It's said she opened her heart and the dimensional door to their world to Hyne's heir. The dark essence of the sorceress's power, eschewing the light that had created the Gift in the first place. The sorceresses of Centra had felt her darkness, and ejected her from their order and Centra itself. This was an insult she would never forget. 

Starting slowly, very slowly, she gathered her power, both magically and within the normal ranks of society. She'd concealed her power, and moved to Esthar, marrying a well off dignitary. For a long time she played the dutiful wife, maneuvering him like a chess piece, until she had no more use for him. He had died suddenly, and of rather suspicious circumstances. With the fortune she'd inherited from him and his political ties, she began to manipulate her way to the top.  She gained power and influence in the political structure of Esthar, and using what she knew of its people and government, she instigated a coup. Once the Estharian government was overthrown, Adel installed herself as dictator and began a campaign of terror the likes of which had never been seen. 

Her first order of business was to create a weapon of mass destruction. The Lunatic Pandora was Adel's vision, given life by Esthar's superior resources. It was only ever used once, to completely destroy Centra with its Lunar Cry.  Adel then began an anti-sorceress campaign, killing off every last one until she was the one and only sorceress in the world. Now no one could rival her power. Centra was no more, there were no other sorceresses to stop her, so she began to target the rest of the world for conquest. She aimed for Galbadia next, which was the second threat to Esthar's power, with Centra out of the way. 

What Adel didn't foresee was the tenaciousness of the people and armies of Galbadia. The war raged on for well over fifty years, Adel always having the upper hand but never enough to completely destroy the Galbadian forces. However, Galbadia was weakened, and all looked hopeless, until around in 63. That was when the Garden was first starting up, with just three hundred SeeDs and a small fleet of warships. 

Until this time, no one had even heard of the Garden or SeeDs, when Balamb was nothing more than a backwater fishing village. It was Balamb's remoteness that had allowed them to amass their power so quickly and secretly, right underneath Adel's nose. She thought she had destroyed any remaining sorceress that could rival her power, but she was wrong. Though the few who were left were barely a match for her, they gave the keys to defeating her to Cid and his band of SeeDs. They gave them the use of Guardian Forces, spirits of the earth who were willing to fight on the mortal plane if called, a technique once only known by sorceresses. By the time Adel knew what was happening, it was too late. It was Garden and their expertly trained SeeDs that had helped turn the tide, defeating Esthar's weary troops. With their army in a shambles it was easy for a group of SeeDs, plus three deserters from the Galbadian army to topple Adel's cruel reign. 

Before Adel was defeated she tried to eliminate SeeD by attacking Balamb, destroying their harbor and fleet of warships. It didn't work; Adel was deposed, but too powerful magically to kill outright. Instead, they sealed her power with a machine built by Odine Laboratories in Esthar and shot her into outer space.  Quickly putting together a space station and a ship to supervise the trapped sorceress, waiting for the day that she would either die or someone powerful enough could kill her. 

Only one sorceress in the history of the world had gone mad with power, but from that day forward, the word held unspoken fear for most people. Gone was the image of the benevolent healer, and in its place was a vicious, bloodthirsty murderess. Though the well educated knew better, there was still quite a bit of prejudice when sorcery was involved. If Rinoa had the gift, she might not be like Edea was turning out to be, and she certainly wasn't an Adel.... but what was she? What did it mean, if anything? Quistis sighed...._ If Rinoa is a sorceress_...._ I'm not sure what I should do. Maybe I'm just overanalyzing. Maybe she had an illegal GF that we didn't know about_. _She could have gotten one on the black market_..... But Quistis still couldn't help feeling vaguely uneasy about what happened. Hoping that when they returned to the Garden that her suspicions were unfounded. Until she could get Rinoa to Garden to be tested, Quistis would be damned if she'd let the girl out of her sight.

****Author's Notes***** (my first ^-^)

Sempai--Japanese for Upperclassman. I thought it sounded cooler than Upperclassman, that's why I used it!! 

Also, you might have noticed a ratings change. I did this for one reason only. In rating movies, the MPAA has concrete guidelines on how many times you can say a certain swear word. For example, Fuck....I believe you can't use the word fuck more than once and stay a PG-13. I have used the word SEVERAL times, along with a host of other horribly awful curses. Basically, I have a potty mouth. Though this story isn't nearly as full the other one I'm working on concurrently. It's all Reno's fault....really. He just swears more than the average character!! IT'S NOT ME!! IT'S HIM!! Anyways, those stories I have where there are multiple occurrences of The FWORD, not even including the other various and horrifying curse words I love to use....I now rate R. If you can't handle or are not allowed to view stories with profuse cussing, turn back now. It'll be better for both of us!! This is the only reason for the change....Thank you and stay oily! ----Noacat


	13. End of the Line

Zell had been working diligently on Rinoa since they arrived on the train. Squall had stayed with him the entire time, helping out when he could. She'd been unconscious for around 45 minutes. He'd managed to use a cure spell that would probably take care of any problems she might be having. Her condition bothered him, something about it just wasn't right. This was more than just fainting because she'd received bad news. That kind of bullcrap only worked in those fast-talking romance movies from the forties his mom liked so much. 

Zell sighed heavily and looked at Squall, "I think Quistis was lying..."

"What do you mean?"

"I think you know very well what I mean. That line Quistis gave us, it's so full of shit.....even you have to smell the stink." 

"Yeah, but why would Quistis lie?"

"I don't know.....What should we do?"

"Nothing.....We could press the issue, but I don't think that's wise. I'm sure if we accused her we wouldn't get much out of her. Unless they decide to tell us what the hell really happened, I don't think we'll ever know. Not like it's my business anyway." 

"Maybe it's some kind of girl thing.....Like, Oooo.....I got me some bad cramps, don't tell the boys......." Zell shrugged, his mood darkening as he looked at Irvine as he sat next to Selphie by the window.  "I don't like that Kinneas.....Lookit him macking all over Selphie......I just don't understand women, why would anyone fall for that?" He was indeed macking, saying anything to get a giggle out of her. 

".....and the green eyed monster rears its ugly head...." 

"Dude....that is SO not cool. I'm not jealous.... I don't like Selphie like that. She's my friend, my home girl...if you will.... and I gotta watch her back. That guy is a total player....he'll break her heart." Zell hissed, jabbing his thumb back.

"Uh-huh....Yah....sure.....whatever...." 

"Oh....like you should talk. I saw that look you gave him...PUH-LEASE!"  Zell said, rolling his eyes mockingly.

"Kiss my ass...." Squall said, flipping him off. 

"Bend over, beehawtch....."

Rinoa moaned and began to stir, her eyes fluttering as she regained consciousness. Zell and Squall paused for a moment, watching her wake up slowly. Squall quickly retreated, his innate shyness taking control, letting Zell take responsibility for Rinoa's care. 

"What happened....where am I?" She asked, tiredly rubbing her eyes.

"You fainted, or something....You're on a train, we're going to Deling City, remember?" Zell asked, still watching her closely to make sure she was all right. 

"Yeah...." Rinoa answered, trying to sit up, "I'm sorry if I worried anyone...."

"As long as you feel better.....How _are_ you feeling?"

"Hungry....and really sleepy."

Zell laughed, "Well, we'll be in the city soon. We can get something to eat once we get there. Why don't you rest some more, okay...."

"Yeah.........Did you take care of me the whole time?"

"Yup!....My specialty is field medicine..." Zell said, smiling wickedly as he glanced over at Squall,  "Squall helped out too....you should thank him, 'cept he kept touching you and stuff......I told him not to but....you know him."

Squall stared at him wide eyed, looking like he might reach over and punch him in the face. He quickly turned away, his face burning bright red. Rinoa propped herself up sleepily, reaching over and lightly smacking Squall's arm. 

She smiled, dropping back down on the couch and mumbling, "Thanks...both of you... and try to keep your hands off of me, okay?" Then she turned over and closed her eyes, falling immediately back into a deep slumber. 

As soon as she dropped off and he was sure she wouldn't hear, Squall turned and hit Zell as hard as he could in the arm. His face was still bright red with embarrassment. Zell rubbed his arm, looking up and laughing like a maniac at his easily flustered friend. 

"That was low...." Squall growled.

"Yup....it was....Gotta admit....I gotcha real good....I was born to burn...I'm telling you dude, she really likes you....she's like all hot for you and shit.  If you aren't all over this, as a friend I'm afraid I'll have to do an intervention....you _need_ to hook up with this chick. "

"What is it with you? I don't like her already....I don't _need_ anybody...I just want people to leave me alone... after all these years, you'd think you could figure that out...." Squall snapped, his cheeks flaring a shade of red Zell didn't even know existed.

"Dude, You are such a bad liar...You're retarded for her. I'm gonna make you admit it, whether you like it or not."  , sticking his tongue out between his teeth and making a face he taunted Squall,  ".......She wants your ass............oh yeah baby.......smack dat ass......YEAH!"

"Idiot..." 

The train made its way across the tracks, clicking noisily every mile they traveled. Soon they were in Deling City, the train coming to a loud and abrupt stop. Then entire group disembarked, walking from the small station and taking their first steps into city itself. Deling City was the biggest city on the entire planet....it was called the city that never slept, because it truly never did. You could go anywhere in Deling City at any time and it was a guarantee that something would be going on. They'd arrived around 7o'clock, just as the afternoon commuters were leaving their jobs for the day. The streets were crowded with tons of people and cars, the noise of the city filling their ears. Large office buildings and skyscrapers towered above them, their glassy fronts glittering by the light of the setting sun. 

Quistis handed Squall the slip of paper she'd been given, she'd tired of being leader. They'd wandered around a bit before it became apparent that they would get lost if they tried to find it on foot. Rinoa suggested taking a cab or a bus, as it would be quicker and far easier than walking. There were too many of them now to go for a cab, so Squall decided a bus would be the best route. He checked a billboard with route information next to one of the many bus stops that littered the streets. The map was quite simple and Squall had easily found a bus that would take them to their destination. It was a small road in the outer suburbs of Deling City. They walked a few blocks and stopped when they got to one that would have buses going the way they wanted. Squall thought briefly about Laguna while he waited at the bus stop....it was strange that he thought of it now, though not too surprising. They were in the city that they'd dreamed about...._not as confusing as that guy made it out to be, what a tool._

Moments later the bus dropped them off in the snug little suburbs of Deling City. They stumbled through the winding streets of the suburb, passing home after home that looked exactly the same. Nearing their destination, Rinoa became more and more agitated and nervous. They ended up in front of a large mansion, with a tall black iron gate that separated its lawn from the sidewalk. In front of the gate stood a lone soldier, apparently guarding the entrance. Squall walked up to the soldier, stopping and saluting.

"Um, We're from Galbadia Garden, we've been sent for...."

"Well, General Caraway sees many students in one day....Only those with the proper passes can enter. You do have a pass?" The guard asked.

"No...." Squall said, looking back at Irvine and Quistis for help, "Irvine, Quistis....do either of you have the pass?"

"No...."

"Nope...I thought they gave it to you."

Squall smacked his forehead with his hand, "Great....Listen, we were sent here by both Galbadia Garden and Balamb on an important mission and we really need to talk to the general....or whoever is in there...Isn't there any other way we can get in?"

"Well....let me think. Bring me back the id number of the student who got lost in the tomb of the unknown king in the ruins to north of us, then maybe I'll let you in.......or even better, how 'bout you piss off." The guard sneered, smiling smugly, thoroughly enjoying his little power trip.

"This is ridiculous!" Rinoa shouted, pushing past Zell and Irvine, "Let me through....What's your name?"

"Um, Rinoa what do you think you're...."

She turned on Squall, holding up a finger in warning, "I can handle this....... Excuse me ....do you know who you're messing with? I'm General Caraway's daughter and if you don't let me in right now, it'll be your job. If you don't believe me, call up to your superior....Ask for Vincent."

Squall looked back at the rest of the party, who were just as stunned as he was. Apparently, Rinoa was the daughter of General Caraway, their supposed contact in Deling City.  The guard wasn't as impressed as they were, and took his sweet time calling up to his superior. He leisurely reached down for his cell phone, sighing dramatically as he turned it on and dialed a number. 

"Hello, Vincent....there's this lady down here and she claims to be General Caraway's daughter.....um...about five five....black hair.....can you...well sure..." the guard paused and handed the phone to her, "He wants to talk to you."

"Hello Vincent..... Yes, it's me....Good to hear you too! I'm okay and you?...That's good to hear.....how are your kids? ....uh-huh...Yeah, he  refuses to let us in.... he was pretty rude about it too...ha...yeah, good help is hard to find...........Okay, thanks....bye. Here you go."

The guard took back his phone and answered it; he didn't even get a chance to get a word in, angry tones came from the receiver that made the young man wince. He hung up the phone and stammered sheepishly, "I-I'm sorry Miss Caraway....I didn't know it was you....I just started here...please don't fire me..."

"Hmpf...Because I'm a gracious lady, I'll put a word in....but you better improve you're manners. Impertinence of that kind will not tolerated, the next time it happens you'll be lucky if you're fired..." She said, haughtily walking past him and opening the gate herself. 

Squall and the rest walked past the severely shaken guard. Zell lingered for a moment to give the guard a derisive smile before entering. Rinoa slowed her pace and rejoined the group quietly. Dropping the arrogant demeanor of a spoiled princess as soon as she was back with her friends.  Selphie walked up to her, still awestruck and impressed.

"So....This General Caraway is your dad...." 

"Biologically, yes. In all other ways, no....He stopped being my father _years _ago." She answered bitterly, her dark eyes glittering with remembered hurt. 

Selphie caught the edge of spiteful anger in her friend's voice and she fell quiet. She didn't understand how someone could hate their parent that much, and she was almost tempted to ask why. It seemed like a sensitive subject, and Selphie judged that now was not the time or place. Though sooner or later, and once she knew Rinoa better, she'd venture to ask. Zell continued the conversation, momentarily oblivious to Rinoa's darkening mood. 

"Are you nervous?" Zell asked, taking in the night air, hands stuffed into his pockets. 

Anger subsided into dull thoughtfulness, Rinoa half whispered, "A little. I'm betting he'll try to keep me here. Ed never liked me living on my own." She inhaled softly, twisting a lock of hair 'round her finger. 

Zell finally noted the look of wounded pain on Rinoa's face. Coming here was hard for her, and he kicked himself for being so blind. He, like Selphie, dropped the subject, falling quiet as they approached the door. Squall watched the proceedings with a detached air, not really paying much attention until Irvine sidled up to Rinoa a lascivious grin on his face. He glowered at the cowboy, and he was halfway tempted to _"accidentally"_ trip him. Zell looked to have much the same thought. _I'll leave it to him_...he thought, looking away disinterestedly. 

Irvine, for his part, was just trying to ease his nerves. Ever since he'd met this group, there was an overwhelming amount of tension that hung in the air. It was claustrophobic, and he needed to rid himself of it. _None of them remember_.....His denim blue eyes wavered mournfully, loneliness rippled in their depths. He covered it up, better that he pretend than to try and awake remembrances that might never be uncovered. It was hard, with the one person he'd tried to find for so many years finally at his side. _Better the lecherous Galbadian Cowboy, than a stranger talkin' crazy_....._it's better this way_....._they don't remember_.....He put his best smile on, creeping up on the raven haired beauty. 

"Don't worry, I'll keep you safe, baby..." Irvine said, slipping an arm around Rinoa's shoulders. _Sorry Seffie_....

Rinoa looked up at him and scowled, smacking his arm off her shoulders, "I can take care of myself!"

Pushing back on the brim of his hat, he whistled, "That's how I like my fillies .......untamed and running free....wild, like the wind..."

"Pfftt...Pig....." Rinoa said, stalking away to join Squall's side.

Squall looked in bewilderment as she strode next to him, her features dark with fresh rage. _Why do you always come back to me, even when I push you away_? He thought briefly, _I just don't get you_.....She was muttering under her breath, the words _Irvine_, _maim_, and _kill_ were all that he could hear. _Still angry at the cowboy, He is irritating_.... _Maybe I'll just let her take care of him instead of Zell_...mused Squall, stifling a smile.

Meanwhile, the drama Irvine created continued, lightening the moodiness of the moment. Selphie was incensed beyond rational thought. Irvine chose that moment to look at her, giving her an _I can't help myself_ smile that didn't hold water. She pouted and without a word, hauled back and socked him in the arm as hard as she could. He winced, rubbing his arm protectively. _That's my girl_...

"What!? I didn't mean it!" He pleaded, holding up his hands in surrender. 

"YAH RIGHT! Don't give me that stupid line......" Selphie shouted over her shoulder as she stormed off to join Rinoa. 

Irvine snapped his fingers, "Damn..."

Zell strolled up to Irvine, a satisfied smile on his face, "Wow...and I was going to tell you to stay away from Selphie....Looks like I don't hafta."

"AND DON'T YOU START EITHER!" Selphie hollered... "God...boys suck."

They arrived at the Caraway's front stoop; Squall stepped forward and pushed the bell. Only waiting for a moment before someone answered and let them in. The major domo, Vincent, came down from upstairs and Squall explained their situation. Vincent agreed to go and get General Caraway, who was indeed their contact in the military. He showed the group into a small drawing room, where everyone patiently waited. 

The doors opened, and General Edward Caraway stepped into the ornate drawing room. He was a small yet striking man, with inky black hair that was streaked with gray at his temples. Walking into the room with his hands behind his back, he looked over the entire group. His eyes stopped on Rinoa, pursing his lips as he walked over to her. 

"Hello, Princess...I didn't expect to see you here." He said, his voice stilted and disapproving. 

"Hello..._ED_..... I'm sure you didn't..." Rinoa replied curtly, "I , myself, find it hard to believe I'm here. However, this really isn't the time or the place to discuss this, don't you think?"

"Don't take that tone with me young lady. I'd like to know what you're doing here, with _these_..... people." Caraway sneered, gesturing at the rest of the group with condescension in his voice.

"I have to agree with Rinoa, sir.  This is not the time to discuss family matters. Squall Leonhart, Commanding Officer, Squad A, Balamb Garden." Squall said, stepping forward and saluting, " Your daughter is here our Guide to customs and geography, as we are unfamiliar with Galbadia.....Now if you don't mind, we'd all like to get on with some _real_ business."

Caraway turned around to look at the young man who'd spoken to him in such a rude manner. He walked over slowly, attempting to stare the boy down. No one had ever been able to match the gaze of Stone Cold Caraway, a nickname given to him behind his back by his students. Squall didn't flinch, his icy eyes unwaveringly following the old man's progress across the room. Caraway stood in front of Squall, sizing the young man up. The boy took his position seriously, of that, Caraway was certain. Nobody had ever stared him down like that, not since he was a Lieutenant in the army...years and years ago. 

Still, there was something about the young man that Caraway immediately disliked. He carried himself with a kind of brash bravado, serious or not, it was a liability in Caraway's eyes. He didn't like the idea of such a fool guarding his daughter's life. That kind of fool had become Galbadia's hero, a fact that had always irritated Caraway. A career soldier, Caraway was authoritarian and strict, he worked his soldiers hard but he worked himself harder. During the war he'd worked harder than he ever had in his whole life. It was his careful plans and strategic thinking that had help to turn the tides, but a showy deserter named Loire stole the limelight. He blew in with a blaze of glory and a half-witted plan and everyone cheered. This boy reminded him of Loire, Caraway's rival and thorn in his side. 

"Well, I suppose you are right....Squall." Caraway said, "What can I do for you?"

"We're the SeeDs that were sent jointly from Balamb and Galbadia Garden. We were told that you had information for us." 

"Ah...yes, it's likely to be quite a lengthy explanation....Please, all of you have a seat." He gestured to the various chairs littered about the rooms. 

Once everyone got comfortable, Caraway began speaking and didn't stop for well over an hour. He blithered on and on and on and on.....showing diagrams, giving them hand outs...Everyone at one time or the other catnapped, with the exception of Squall and Quistis.  Despite the length and the boredom, he gave them everything they'd need to complete the mission. 

There was some kind of big celebration the next night and the Sorceress would be there. A full day party that'd go long into the night, ending in a spectacular parade and fireworks. At the parade, the Sorceress was scheduled to ride aboard a massive float with minimal guards, on it she'd be totally exposed and an easy target. They'd have to spend the night in a strange city again, but this time they had nice hotel rooms with baths and showers. 

Caraway stood, blocking their path so they couldn't leave, "Before all of you go. I have to insist that my daughter stays behind. She has no training for this kind of mission. For her safety and yours, she should stay..."

Rinoa was about to shout something at him, but Quistis stopped her, "I understand fully sir. However, she's been our guide to customs and geography....her help is invaluable to us. I'm afraid I'll have to disagree with your assessment of the situation. Besides, she has a contract with our Garden. We've been hired to escort her back to Balamb. Her contract is as important to us as this mission....."

Caraway's eyes went dark, narrowing as he looked from person to person. Tension in the room was high. All shuffling nervously in anticipation as tension once again took hold. Squall surreptitiously stood in front of Rinoa, his arms crossed. Rinoa just stood in shock that Quistis or for that matter, Squall, would defend her like that. 

The General sighed, "I understand.....However, Miss Trepe, if you and Irvine would stay for a moment, I have things I'd like to go over with you. It'll only take a few minutes."

The rest of the SeeDs filed out of the room, with Rinoa following behind. Before she could leave the room, her father grabbed her wrist, drawing her near. He spoke to her in a low voice, so the SeeDs couldn't hear, "They're not your friends, Princess. I know it must seem like it, but believe me....you're nothing but a paycheck to them. I have your best interest in mind.... I care about you, they don't....." 

Rinoa glared at the old man, "Yeah, you cared so much that you couldn't wait to get rid of me after Mom's funeral. Less than a week and you shipped me off....I bet that's some kind of record....."

"That was in the past....I do care about you....." He whispered furiously at her.

She jerked her arm away, breaking his grip on her, spiteful malice marring her beautiful features. Without further word, she turned her back on him, striding out of the office her head held high to join the rest of the group in the foyer. The others asked her no questions about what her father had whispered, the look on her face was one huge sign that screamed **Do not touch**. The door closed, leaving the remaining members to wait in uncomfortable silence. All remained quiet for a spell, till Zell couldn't stand the silence any more. 

"Wonder what he wants to talk to them about?" Zell queried while staring at the ceiling. He was trying not to be irritated by the wait. 

Selphie shrugged, "Who knows. Probably extra secret orders or somethin'"

Squall said nothing, being content to sit and wait quietly. Rinoa wanted to leave, to run as fast as she could away from this death trap. It was all she could do just to stand there and not scream. Her rage was softened somewhat by the earlier intervention of her friends. Her friends….is that what they were? She wondered why Quistis and Squall had stood up for her. A nagging doubt seeded by her father, a fact which she recognized. Still, she couldn't help but wonder why, and curiously she turned slightly to look at Squall. _Should I ask_? He moved and she panicked, quickly averting her gaze as a light blush flowered across her cheeks. After five minutes the door opened, Quistis and Irvine stepping out in businesslike fashion. Caraway stood just barely over the threshold, giving his daughter one last look. A strange mournful pause, that made Rinoa almost pity him. Almost. The meeting was over with and finally they could leave. No one was more relieved than Rinoa, if she never saw the inside of this place again it'd be too soon. Quistis and Irvine bowed before leaving, the General nodded and closed the door on them. 

Squall spoke first, pushing himself off of the wall he'd been leaning on, "So, What was that all about?"

Quistis shot Irvine a look, making sure he wouldn't say anything, "Special orders for the ranking officer and sharp shooter. Nothing you have to know about...."

Squall's pale eyes narrowed, he had come to be suspicious with Quistis ever since the incident at Galbadia Garden. He'd follow her orders, but disliked the fact that she was keeping things from him. The group left the Caraway residence, walking towards the nearest bus that'd take them to their hotel. 

Caraway watched them from his window, concern knitting his tired brow. He'd let them go without a fight. A few years ago that was something he wouldn't have done. Shaking his head, he closed the curtains and went to his desk to attend to his other business. He was sincerely afraid for his daughter, as she was his only child. Over the years they'd grown so distant and now he couldn't think of any way to reconnect with her. In truth, he'd given up...resigned to loosing his daughter's heart for good. Now, with this mission, he was worried about loosing more than just her heart. There was a sense of dread deep in his guts that somehow this all would end badly. 


	14. Calm Before the Storm

The Garden had arranged for them to stay at the Red Rose Inn, a comfortable out of the way little hotel. They managed to secure two rooms for the party. Rinoa breathed a sigh of relief, he features relaxing the further she got from the Caraway residence. Her lips turning up, the half smile she always wore returning with each step. Ever the responsible one of the group, Quistis checked in and retrieved the room keys. One room was larger than the other, and there was much argument over which group got which. Despite Zell's loud objections, the girls won. 

The girls took the larger of the two rooms, all three eager to be the first to jump in the tub. There was quite a bit of quibbling, until Rinoa suggested tossing a coin. After another few minutes of girly chatter, they found a coin and flipped it. Rinoa won both coin tosses, much to Quistis and Selphie's dismay. They cheered up when Rinoa showed them the booty she'd pilfered from her dad's house, clean night clothes to sleep in. 

When her Father was droning on, Rinoa waited until he wouldn't miss her and had snuck up into her old room. Creepily enough, he'd kept it just the same way she'd had it when she left so many years ago. She stole some of her old clothes, hoping they'd still fit, though she was pretty sure she hadn't grown much. Nevertheless, she tried to choose stuff that looked baggy and a little oversized. It was funny how sneaking into her room was just as nerve-wracking as it had been sneaking out of it. 

She'd lied a little when she had said that her father had gotten her into Timber Fine Arts. Her father wanted to send her to the Garden, a proposition Rinoa found unacceptable. She wanted to be a musician, not some mindless drone soldier. The military was his world, not hers. Tired of living under his thumb, she sought out alternatives, all of which he nixed. In desperation, she'd filled out the forms for TFA herself, and once she found out she'd been accepted with a full scholarship, planned her get away with the help of her maternal Grandmother. Nana had always disapproved of the way he'd treated her only granddaughter, and was more than eager to lend Rinoa a hand.

 That summer she'd worked like a dog, saving up every penny, taking as many as three or four jobs. Her father had been so proud of her and her hard work. Then one late summer night, Rinoa,  with all her hard earned money and what little extra her Nana could spare, packed a few belongings and skipped town. She arrived in Timber two days later, no apartment, no job, no friends....nothing but a few thousand dollars, a couple of changes of clothes, her card collection and a small picture of her mother she still carried to this day. She was only thirteen at the time, and yet found the strength to set herself up in a strange city all by herself. Lying about her age, she got a job at a small bookstore. Taking odd jobs in-between  to supplement her income. She did extremely well in her classes, and brought her own books with what little money she had, though she had no where to live.  For the first few months she managed day to day, staying in motels or youth hostels until she could get an apartment. 

 Nearing autumn of her first year there, she met Watts at a local teen hang out. He was in a band and needed a singer. When Rinoa told him that she could sing, he immediately invited her to join his band, Sonic Death Monkey. Watts taught her how to play guitar.....She taught him how to play piano and cheat on cards. He offered her a place to stay, letting her take a room that he shared with a couple of other friends. She gratefully accepted, as she'd tired of staying in motel rooms. A cozy arrangement. 

Watts had a huge crush on her, she had known that from the beginning. She valued her friendship with him, and didn't want screw it up by trying to make it anything more. He agreed, and though he still had feelings for her, he kept them under wraps. She was the best friend he'd ever had and an excellent musician. Sonic Death Monkey disbanded, Rinoa and Watts continuing on as a duo without the rest of the baggage. They made a wonderful team, she wrote the music and he wrote the lyrics. They played any place people would let them, making a modest sum on the gigs they managed to secure. A steady stream of friends and other dead beat musician types, floating in and out of the two story converted apartment building that had become home. It was a blissful time for Rinoa, one of the few moments in her life that wasn't fraught with difficulty. She was happy, challenged by her classes with a large group of friends, it was heaven for her. 

Then one year later, violence broke out in Timber again. The Galbadian appointed government and the residents of Timber had a long history of violence against each other. Both sides believing they were right. Galbadia considered Timber its territory and didn't much care if the natives thought different, bombing Timber to prove their point. Timber had little in the way of resources, and its citizens would often resort to malicious street violence as revenge.  A never-ending cycle, anger and resentment passing from generations as the occupation went on and on. 

They met Zone that year, helping dig people out of the ruins of Timber's once beautiful streets. Her school had been bombed, and all classes were halted. All pleasant activity ceased, there were curfews and check points. No classes, no clubs to play at, no reason to make music anymore. She had been turned out of Eden. The only thing she had left were her friends. The military, it had taken the one thing she loved away from her. It killed her muse, her freedom and she swore that she'd make them pay for what they'd done. It was then that the three of them hatched the idea for the Forest Owls. 

Her father eventually tracked her down, his military contacts had helped, and begged her to come home. She refused, it was her life and he had no right. He got angry and had told her that if she didn't come home now, that he'd disown her, cut her off forever. Not that it mattered much.....she had done well for herself without his help this far, why would she accept it now? They didn't talk for awhile, until he sent a small birthday card for her sixteenth birthday....last year. Inviting her back home for a small get together. She went, met Seifer, and the rest was history. 

His card, that's how she got her loathsome nickname within the Forest Owls. They'd found her card and read the inscription on the inside. _Princess, missing you_...._hope you'll come home soon, Love Daddy_....Everyone thought it was sooooo funny. _Gee, that's so you Rinoa_.... _Daddy's little girl_..._his pretty Princess_...._oooh! Her Highness_......She never told anyone how she'd really come to live in Timber....never knew why. Perhaps she just didn't want people to feel bad for her. The label princess was bad enough, she didn't need poor little rich girl added to it. 

Leaving Quistis and Selphie to fight over who got to wear what night shirt, Rinoa entered the bathroom. She started up her bath, the sound of cascading water filling the tiny room. She stripped and stuck her toe into the water hesitantly. Deciding it wasn't too hot, she put it in the rest of the way. Letting the warm water gradually surround her until she was all the way in the tub. She closed her eyes and dunked her head underneath the water. Sitting up suddenly, she grabbed the convenient hotel shampoo and squeezed out a small droplet. Rubbing it between her small hands, she reached up and worked it into her hair. Slowly she went over her cleaning routine, a ritual repeated hundreds of times. Wash the hair, condition it, scrub the face....etc and once she was done, relaxation could begin. It felt so good to be clean again, it seemed like ages since she was in Timber.... even longer since she last took a real bath. Inhaling deeply, she let the humid air penetrate her. She stared at the ceiling, wondering at the unreality of her life as it was. 

It was strange that when you ask for your life to change, you never once think of what it might mean. Sometimes change in theory is better than in reality. Rinoa could feel herself at that crossroad, wondering if this change was as good as she thought it would be. Here she was, in a city she hated, with people she barely knew. Even stranger was the idea that tomorrow she was to help them assassinate a sorceress. That being done, it would be to Balamb they go. Her future fuzzy and unfocused. What would she do? 

_Squall, what about Squall_. She pondered what to do, turning her thoughts to that all consuming obsession... Was it love? Maybe, definitely _like_....she liked him, well, at least she thought he was cute...but...He wasn't always nice. In fact, he was very rarely nice and only ever showed glimmers of that man she met at the dance. Was the person she saw then merely a fabrication of her own overactive imagination? A school girl's dream of a cold insensitive man that you could shape like putty. Dreams were so far removed from reality. 

Would it be worth it? She'd never been the kind of girl to sit and hope that with gentle pressure she could change someone. If they wanted to change, they would. All the pushing in the world wouldn't help if they didn't. She'd seen all to many girls who thought beauty could tame the beast. Pathetic wretches who subjugated their own wants and desires, rather than risk the ire of their significant others. That wasn't the kind of relationship she was interested in. Still, there was something about him that drew her nearer. Every now and then, he'd drop that wall and she'd see the wounded boy behind the man.....and it tore at her heart. _You're a sad, sad woman, Rinoa_....._drawn in by silly self made sob stories. Get over him, get over yourself. Idiot._

She pouted, dunking her head beneath the water again. Still submerged, she dragged her fingers through her hair as it swirled around her head like an underwater halo, popping back up an instant later. _Just don't worry about it anymore. If something happens, then it happens_...._if not, it wasn't meant to be_....._I just wish I could tell if he likes me or not. Could ask him_....That thought made her nervous. She was a fearless girl in some respects, but she'd never handled rejection well....._No, I'm good with the mystery. _It only took her a few minutes to completely wash up. She toweled off, brushing her hair out and tying it into a loose ponytail. Rinoa slipped into the t-shirt that would serve as a night gown. She gathered up her scattered clothes, and left the bathroom for the next user. 

" 'Bout time! I thought you'd NEVER get out!!" Selphie exclaimed, making a dash for the bathroom and slamming the door shut. 

Rinoa smiled, dropping her clothes near her side of the bed. Quistis and Rinoa agreed to share a bed and leave Selphie, aka the bed hog, on her own. Rinoa left for a moment to go and get some sodas from the pop machine. Alone in the room, Quistis noticed Rinoa's pile of unfolded clothes. Ever the mom of the group, she sighed and bent down to fold them up and put them away properly. As she did so, a small slip of paper fell out of the pocket. She picked it up, it was a very old, worn photograph of a woman. It looked to be at least thirty or more years old, and in black and white. The woman in the photograph looked very much like Rinoa, only with shorter hair. She posed elegantly, smiling while looking up at some unseen wonder. Around ten minutes later, Rinoa came back with the sodas, her smile fading a little when she saw Quistis with her picture. 

"Who's this?" Quistis asked, holding it up.

Rinoa walked over and sat down next to Quistis, "It's my mom...." 

"She's beautiful. You look a lot like her." Quistis said, looking up at her. 

"Thanks....that's what everyone says." 

Looking over the picture,  Quistis wondered what it'd be like to have a mother of her own. She envied Rinoa sometimes. It brought her back to what happened in Galbadia Garden. She'd wanted to talk to Rinoa after everything went down, but the opportunity had never arose. Was now her moment?

"Um......Rinoa, I wanted to apologize......for what happened in Garden....."

Rinoa stopped still, her face freezing for a moment. She'd been wondering when Quistis would bring that up. "It's okay. No big........"

"Well.....I guess, it's just......I feel terrible, with you fainting and all.....and....Me and ...Squall, I had a thing for him....I guess I'm just a little bit jealous, I'm sorry for what I said. It was unprofessional and inappropriate....." Quistis stopped, thinking about what she ought to say next. _Hey, are you a sorceress and if not, do you have any illegal G.F.s_......_just wondering_....._really great plan, Quistis, just brilliant_....."So.....do you faint a lot, not to be all nosy but.......it was kind of strange, that's all. I didn't really want to say anything, but.....I guess, I'm just worried......"

Rinoa cleared her throat, the subject made her quite nervous,  "No, actually......it _was_ kind of weird...... In fact, I've never fainted my whole life. Even when I closed my finger in the bathroom door this one time......"

"Oh......." Quistis nodded, trying to stay casual,  "Ow, I bet that one's a real story.......So, do you remember what happened?"

"No.....Not really.......I remember you grabbing my hand, and then......nothing. It all gets real hazy.........." Rinoa paused, unable to think of how to say what she needed to, "Quistis, is there something the matter with me? Ever since then, I've just felt...... wrong.... like you know when you feel like you're coming down with a cold...... like that, only not........God, that sounds incredibly stupid."

"No, it's not stupid........." Quistis studied the girl, Rinoa was guiless, her face showing every emotion. The older woman was certain that Rinoa was telling her the truth. "I'm sure its nothing.....you can get a check up when we get to Balamb, if you're still worried."

"Thanks....." Rinoa smiled softly.

"Why?"

"For being so nice, right now......Um, so you like Squall right?"

"I did......I guess I still do a little, but...."

Rinoa quickly interrupted, "If you want me to back off, I could.....I know you guys have been.....friends awhile. It's not really fair, if I just....butt in.....Sorry, Zell told me some stuff....."

"No, that's alright.........You don't have to back off. Rinoa, you haven't known him long enough to learn Squallese......He likes you, in his own way. Besides, he'll never see me the way I see him, it's something that I just should deal with...........Anyway, I'm sorry....."

"Me too......Sorry for being a butthead....Friends?" Rinoa smiled, genuinely happy that whatever issue that stood between them had been solved. 

"Friends......" Quistis smiled back, seeing Rinoa for what she really was for the first time. A young girl with no idea of what might be happening to her. Just trying to live her life, a girl with a million possibilities. A young girl that could have been Quistis, if her parent's hadn't died and left her in an orphanage. It was a sobering thought, that maybe they weren't so different as she had surmised. 

The awkwardness surrounding them dissipated, both girls seeing the possibility of friendship with the other. They sat there silently for a moment, looking down at the picture of Rinoa's mother. Just then, Selphie popped out of the bathroom, joyously skipping through the room and landing with a thump on the bed. 

"Utcha lookin' at??" 

"Is it okay?" Quistis asked, waiting for Rinoa's nod and then leaning over to show Selphie, "It's a picture of Rinoa's mom...."

"WOW! She looks like a movie star!" Selphie exclaimed, Rinoa's mom looked just like the woman in her dream and she was tempted to tell Quistis and Rinoa what had happened on the way to Timber, "Hey....this is like a real slumber party. We should play some cool party games....like light as a feather....or...or....truth or dare!!"

"Selphie....please....That's so immature. Besides, we have a big day tomorrow." Quistis chided, handing Rinoa's photo back carefully.  

"Quistis...you were born to be a mom..." Rinoa said, "Don't be a party pooper....you only live once. Ooo! Ooo! Oooo! Let's play truth or dare."

"Leave me out of this....I'm taking my bath." Quistis said with a smile, getting up and shutting the bathroom door.

"Okay....I guess it's just me and you..." 

 "Hey...." Selphie said, looking around, figuring that Rinoa would be more open to hearing her story than Quistis. She'd reached her breaking point and unable to hold it in any longer, blurted out, "Do you want to hear a really weird story?"

"Sure...." Rinoa giggled, flopping down next to Selphie. 

"Well, on the ride to Timber from Balamb,  I had this dream. It was about this guy, right.....He was going to see this lady he had a crush or something on, cause she, like, played at this club. Her name was Julia......The weird part is, the lady in my dream looks EXACTLY  like that picture of your mom....Freaky isn't it?"

"Are you shitting me?..." Rinoa gasped, her voice shaky and quiet. _Why do I get all the weird stuff_.....

"No lie....and like, he met her afterwards and they had this big romantic scene and everything....Oh! AND the lady he was meeting even played piano.....I can still 'member the name of the tune she played......it was called Eyes On Me...." Selphie said, enthusiastically spilling the entire story out.

Rinoa's eyes got real wide, her face paling a little, "My mom's name was Julia and that song....Eyes On Me.....that was her song..... it was really big, back in the 60's...............What was the guy's name?"

"Laguna....."

"What.....are you messing with me, because if you are, it's not funny...."

"N-no....I'm serious.....I'm sorry.....What do you mean???" Selphie squeaked, he eyes becoming large and frightened. 

"Well, If it's the Laguna I'm thinking of.........Laguna Loire, you probably don't know him because you don't come from Galbadia. He's our biggest hero... We call him the Emancipator...he freed this city when it was occupied by Esthar in the Sorceress war......"

"Wow....that's fairly weird." 

"........Even weirder, It's entirely possible for my mom to have met him. They lived around the same time....it's possible that he could have met her on leave or something. Though I really doubt that it was her….Still, that is fucked up.....What do you think it means?"

"I don't know. I've been dying to tell someone but....well,  Squall told us that...we outta wait till our mission was over. I just think it's too strange, that maybe we should have someone look into it. I mean, it wasn't just me, it was all three of us and it wasn't like a dream. It was like _we were_ Laguna and a couple of his friends....it was weird and scary, kind of.." Selphie said, nervously looking towards the bathroom door as it rattled,  "Hey...Whatever you do, don't tell Quistis!"

"Why?" 

Selphie looked at her, lower lip sticking out, "You know how she'd go on....oh You're such a baby, Selphie....that's just supersticious nonsense...you're making a mountain out of a mole hill.....besides, it _is_ kinda weird. I just don't think she'd believe me...and I don't really wanna hear one of her mom lectures....she's such a downer sometimes..."

"Yeah, she is kind of a wet blanket....okay, I promise..."

Selphie's emerald eyes narrowed, changing the topic to something that bothered her, "So....What's going on with you and Squall?" 

"N-nothing.....there is nothing....going on" Rinoa stammered, a furious blush searing her cheeks. 

"Really....I guess I just was wondering. 'Cus the rest of us have been talking and... well, I just noticed some _THINGS_ and it got me to wondering........" 

"What things!? There are no _THINGS_....I'm completely thing free!!"

"Suuuuuure.....not like you two fight like an old married couple, not like you stare at him with little stars in your eyes.....not even counting how you're always following like two steps behind him ....'sides....you almost told Zell point blank that you liked him....So just spit it out already. I want it from the chocobo's mouth...." 

_That rat_...._I'm gonna kick his spiky haired ass_.....Rinoa looked down, nervously fidgeting with her necklace, "Okay....yeah....I kinda sorta have a huge crush on him, but......." 

Selphie smiled mischievously, poking at Rinoa's side, "I think it's more than a crush....."

"Maybe. I'm thinkin' it'll just be easier to give up...I don't think he likes _me_. He thinks I'm just annoying.....maybe I am, I don't know." She smiled back weakly, trying not to feel too bad. 

"I don't think you are!! _BESIDES_..... Zell thinks...."

"I know....he seems to be under the delusion that Squall has a romance novel style passion for me.....however, I am under the belief that Zell is insane."

"Okay, can't argue with that, but what about Quistis.....she thinks he likes you. I overheard her talking to you earlier...."

"BAH! She's as insane as Zell..... " Rinoa tired of the topic, lighting upon a sudden switch, "What about you and Irvine....I sense sparkage there."

It was Selphie's turn to blush, "You think so!! I was hoping.....Is it that noticeable?" 

Rinoa nodded, "I think he likes you a lot too. He only bothers me and Quistis to keep up appearances, but you can see his heart isn't in it.....least that's my thought."

"What should I do?" Selphie asked, biting her lip.

"I think you're playing it perfect. Being all cute and innocent.....I think it's something fresh, uncharted territory if you will. Play hard to get, it's the challenge he likes..." Rinoa answered with a solemn nod. 

"So...What are you going to do?" 

"Don't know. Just wait, I guess.....Let's not talk about this anymore, it's depressing me."  

Selphie looked at her sympathetically, "Hey, don't you worry. Me 'n Zell got it handled.....I think you'll need some third party intervention for it to work....."

Rinoa smirked, gazing at her doubtfully,  "What are you gonna do? Badger him to death until he just gives up? I've tried, it doesn't work...."

"It will with me on the job!! No one can resist my lethal combo of pure hell born cuteness and seductive charm!"  Selphie opened her eyes wide, her mouth pulling into the goofiest grin Rinoa had ever seen, "DENY ME NOTHING!!! I AM YOUR GOD NOW!! ALL BOW TO SELPHIE!!" She thrust her fists triumphantly in the air, " GIVE SELPHIE CANDY CORN!" 

Rinoa busted a gut, falling backwards on the bed while holding her stomach as gales of hiccupping laughter erupted from her, "Mercy....Mercy....." Rinoa gasped, "Stop...Oh lord, it hurts......" 

Selphie stopped for a moment, waiting until Rinoa caught her breath.  "NO MERCY! YOU WILL BOW TO THE MIGHT OF CANDY CORN!!" Selphie shouted, looking at Rinoa and then chucking a pillow at her,  "THINK FAST!!"

"THAT TEARS IT!...I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE....EAT  PILLOW DEATH!!" Rinoa exclaimed, giggling and throwing a pillow back at her. 

Selphie caught the pillow, throwing it back at Rinoa , missing, and hitting Quistis just as she was exiting the bathroom instead. The room froze for a moment, Selphie's mouth opening and closing in alarm. Quistis scowled and whipped it back at Selphie, hitting her so hard she fell back onto the bed. 

"And I thought I taught you better than that!" Quistis said, smiling wickedly. 

They looked at each other for a moment, then started throwing pillows at each other indiscriminately. A free range pillow fight ensued, eventually degenerating into all three collapsing in a giggling heap. They continued in this vein, laughing and giggling the entire night. Watching crappy movies, riffing on the actors and the bad sets. Singing favorite show tunes at the top of their lungs. Round table discussions on which guys were cute, what rock star they'd sleep with, which actress they wished they looked like...etc. etc....the kinds of things that cement the bonds of friendship amongst girls. 

They stayed up until around 2 o'clock in the morning. The entire night reminded Rinoa of when she was little and had all her friends over. She hadn't stayed up that late in ages. In fact, in the last few years she didn't have as much fun as she did last night. She'd been so focused on the Forest Owls and freeing Timber that she forgot what it was to be truly carefree. It felt good, really good, to let it all out and be silly for awhile. She closed her eyes, knowing she was going to pay in the morning for staying up so late. 

The next morning all three girls were exhausted, taking their sweet time waking up. There was a knock at the door, Quistis, who was the most awake and dressed, answered it. Zell was standing outside, wanting to be let in to talk with them. Quistis let him in, despite Rinoa's groggy objections. He sat down on Selphie's side of the bed, looking at Rinoa still half asleep, her covers wrapped around her like a cocoon. Quistis shook her awake. Mumbling vague epithets under her breath, she got up. Rinoa shuffled tiredly to the bathroom, joining Selphie, who was going through the process of getting ready. 

"So, what do you need?" Quistis asked, pulling her long blonde hair up and pinning it back. 

"Well, we're all wondering what's going on........What's the plan for today?" Zell asked, snapping his fingers and making a face. 

"You never listen.....Don't you remember what Caraway said? That Parade doesn't start until twenty-two hundred....You're on my team, so we have to allow at least an hour or more to get into position......Squall's team waits at the President's gate, so they'd have to get there around the same time, maybe a little later, like a quarter past or something. We don't really have to make a bunch of preparations, because everything's been taken care of....So, we have most of the day free."

Rinoa was more awake now, having washed and changed. She poked her head out of the bathroom with a sunny smile, "I got an idea...." opening the door to the outside, and padding over to the room next door. She rapped on the door as hard as she could and screamed, "Hey KINNEAS! Get your ass out here!"

Irvine slowly opened up the door, looking out at Rinoa with confusion, " M'lady, you  shouted?"

"Yeah, come here a minute..." She said, to which he shrugged and entered the girl's room, "We got some time before we hafta go and do our thang....You're from around here, like me...What say we show these tourists around?"

"I guess.... Where you thinking of going?"

"Well, how 'bout the art museum.....um....Loire's monument....I don't know...any place we feel like going...."

"Cool........." Irvine said, sitting down on the bed next to Zell, "Hey, go wake up Sunshine."

"No way! You do it...."

"Kiss my ass and call me Charlie! You've known him longer, and I'm not risking losing my limbs."

"AW! MAN!" Zell complained, dreading having to wake the sleeping lion. Squall was never a peach to wake up, and he'd been terribly grumpy as of late, "If I'm not back in five minutes, send for an ambulance...."  

"I take it you had a long night....." Quistis said, clipping on her belt.

"Yeah....you could say that..." Irvine said, smirking, "What the hell where you three doing? It sounded like someone was being mauled in here."

"We were having wild monkey sex....Nekkid pillow fights....." Rinoa cracked, shrugging her shoulders, "You know, Girl stuff..."

"OH YEAH! My prayers were answered!! Did you video tape it?" 

"Oh! ICK! If even we _had_ done that we wouldn't have taped it......" Selphie shouted from the bathroom. 

"...And if we taped it we'd show everybody BUT you!" Rinoa quipped. 

"...That's just cruel!  Bringing my hopes up and smashing them to the ground...Have a heart, I had a bad night....Squall was being a pissy bitch...Is he always like this?"

Zell returned a moment later, all his limbs intact, "To answer your question, NO...not always, but a lot. Though I have to admit, last night, total asshole. I hate when he's moody like that. This trip has been a total downer, from beginning to end. Man, when do I get to have fun?" 

Stepping out long enough to taunt Zell, Selphie chimed,  "WHAT A WHINER!! We had more fun than you did, Nah nah nah nah boo boo!!"  

"At least I'm not a retard....er er er er...."

While Zell and Selphie taunted each other;  Quistis, Irvine, and Rinoa sat down and went over where they could go, making a rough plan of attack. They went back and forth about various locations, someone didn't want to go there, someone else had an objection to that place....Eventually Zell and Selphie tired of teasing each other and joined the conversation. Zell suggested splitting up and going where ever they wanted to. That idea was nixed right away by Quistis, who insisted that they stayed together. It made sense enough to play a gaggle of teenage tourists, instead of a team of well trained assassins,  and if they were all together there was no chance that someone would get lost and end up messing up the evenings plans. That confirmed, compromises were made and a loose itinerary was decided before Squall finally made an appearance. He stumbled into the room, still half asleep, clumsily pulling on his coat. 

"Well, now that we're all here....Shall we go." Rinoa announced. 

Leaving the hotel in the early morning light, they found a nice little cafe that was open and ate some breakfast. Squall had woken up a little more, not that anyone would notice, as they kept their distance from him. He'd not slept well the night before, between the girls screaming in the next room and Irvine and Zell arguing over the most inane twaddle. Their childish banter when on for hours, slinging base and unimaginative insults into the wee hours. The wee hours for him being around twelve, Squall had always gone to bed early to wake early. His normal schedule not being reserved or even respected, annoyed him to the breaking point. He finally got sick of it and snapped at them to shut the hell up so that he could get some god damned sleep. Perhaps he'd been too short, but he was tired damn it all. 

Zell and Irvine put their problems aside and watched TV together for a bit, leaving Squall to sulkily take a stab at sleeping. It was fruitless, as he was a light sleeper and once his roommates decided to pack it in, it was way later than he liked. Not to mention that both Irvine and Zell snored, and to add to that, he shared a bed with Zell, who stole all the covers. He spent the entire night cold and sleepless. Waking up the next morning and finding out that he was being forced to go sightseeing didn't improve his mood. 

Things were changing too fast for him. He went from being a student, with worries that were no bigger than acing the next test.  To a leader of a squad of SeeDs, heaping the success or failure of an important mission on his shoulders. He'd already failed once and had worried incessantly about the coming mission. 

To add to that, there was Rinoa....he didn't know what to do about his feelings for her. Every time she laughed....smiled....looked at him....his chest tightened and his stomach did flip flops...He wasn't naive, he knew that he was infatuated with her but he didn't know what he should do about it. Part of him wanted to see where it went, but deep down he knew he should crush it before it went too far. 

Falling in love wasn't something that was meant for a person like him. Squall didn't want to remember what it was like to be loved, only to have it snatched away.....and he didn't want to hurt her. It made him angry that she seemed to want to push him to it. If she'd just give up and leave him alone, everything would be easier for both of them. He couldn't deal with the confusing emotions roiling inside him. So he did the only thing he could think to do, he bottled up his feelings, letting them eat at him. The tension and the stress of it had taken its toll, and he'd fallen into a surly depression.  He ate silently, and woe be it to the person who talked to him. The rest of the group sensed this and no one tempted fate. 

They wandered around the city, occasionally stopping at a store that was open. He managed to snag a book at a small bookstore that was open early. It was a nice little volume of poetry he'd been looking for, it was out of print and extremely hard to find. This discovery lightened his mood considerably. After a bit they went to the Deling City Museum of Art and Antiquities. It was interesting enough, especially some of the early Chiang Dynasty pottery and a lovely impressionist landscape painted by Cheré that he'd always hoped to see. 

At the Museum shop Selphie picked up a disposable camera and began to mercilessly take pictures. He managed to duck most of  her attempts to snap a photo of him, though she managed a lucky shot here and there. By the time they were done with the Museum, it was time to eat lunch.  He was still quiet, but at least he was content enough to enjoy the sights and sounds of the city. 

They found a place that served traditional Galbadian dishes, which was okay by him, though there was some grumbling by those with pickier palates. Mostly Zell, whose tastes when it came to food only included fast food crap. Squall ate fast and ended up reading a bit out of his poetry book while he waited for everyone else. 

Finishing up, they walked aimlessly around the city, visiting various monuments. They went to the top of the Grable building, the world's tallest skyscraper. Zell and Irvine debated, childishly, whether or not a coin would kill someone if dropped from this height. The girls had kept to themselves most of the trip, as they were now. Gathered in a little group, giggling uproariously and making a scene whenever they could. 

Rinoa and Selphie seemed to take the most delight in being silly, Quistis hanging back to keep them in line if they got too out of control. The lion's share of their time was spent trying to sneak up on Squall to snap more pictures of him. It annoyed him, and the only thing that made it tolerable was the thought of an entire roll of film wasted on pictures of him flipping Selphie off. 

Leaving the Grable, the wandered over to Loire's monument. Squall and Zell took one look at it and almost passed out from shock. Loire's monument was dedicated to the guy they had a dream about, a fact Selphie had already found out. They looked at each other, faces pale and sweaty, silently registering their shock to each other. Both of them kept their mouths shut, trying to act like nothing was wrong. Selphie insisted on a group photo in front of the statue, bothering another tourist to take the picture. 

Before heading off to the next location, Selphie cajoled everyone into waiting until her photos were developed. They waited around for 45 minutes, finally picking up her finished pictures. Selphie paged through the pictures,  passing the ones she'd already looked at around, inviting people to keep any one that they liked....she'd gotten doubles. Squall passed by most of the photos without even looking at them. One caught his eye, it was a picture of Rinoa in a spontaneous pose....A close up of her in profile, leaning against the railing at the Grable building. Her head titled to look out the window, she was smiling wistfully. Nervously, he slipped the photo into his pocket, hoping no one noticed. He didn't know why he wanted to keep it....perhaps to have a memento of her before he drove her away. 

The last place they visited was Marlin Parks, a medium sized amusement park near the middle of the city. Squall was less than thrilled at the idea of going to an amusement park and even more annoyed that he'd have to pay to not ride anything.  Thanking the gods he remembered to buy a book, at least he could read while the idiots have their fun. Once again, the decision was made that they wouldn't split up, that much. 

They left Squall to read on a bench near the middle of the park. Occasionally, someone would come back and check up on him but for the most part he had time to himself. Every now and then he'd take out the picture when he was sure no one would see him with it. He tried to reason with himself. _I should just throw it away_..._be done with all this nonsense_...._It's silly, I'm NOT in love with her_..._I don't need anyone_...._I'm just feeling insecure because of this mission_......_This is stupid_...._you're just fooling yourself_.. but it didn't work, he kept the picture, tucking it into the left inside pocket of his jacket.... Picking up his book, he began to read, pushing thoughts of love and Rinoa aside. 

He'd managed to make good way in his book, forgetting about his flirtation with love, when Rinoa came up and sat next to him. Squall waited for her to start bugging him, asking an endless stream of annoying questions. She hadn't tried to talk to him before...he got lucky then, but now he had the feeling his luck might run out. Deliberately defying his expectations, she didn't try and bug him into talking. It had begun to seriously freak him out. 

In fact, she hadn't really talked to him much lately at all. Ever since their fight on the train, she'd kept her distance. Perhaps his tactic had worked? Something bothered him about that, a small hope held deep within that she wouldn't give up that easily. There was an air of pensive sullenness around her that didn't fit with her personality at all. Worried, he half thought of asking her if she was alright. He stopped himself, realizing that it was quite contrary to what he wanted. _That is what I want, right_? _For her to leave me alone_....Though when it came to her, things never were as sure as he thought. 

As if she sensed his anxiety, she turned her gaze to him, "Squall....." 

_Here it comes_.....He didn't even look up, managing to keep his voice at it's normal neutral monotone,  "What...." 

"Why did you and Quistis stand up for me? With my father....I mean....Why didn't you let him just keep me there? It's not like I belong with you guys or anything...." Her eyes searched his face, it remained an implacable rock...void of any emotion. _Just give up, stupid_....

"Because you have a contract...You're essentially our employer until we fulfill our obligation to you."

_Damn it all! I'm such an idiot_....She bit her lip, inhaling shakily, "So...it's just a job, right? And you won't let anything else get in the way till it's done. I see....I'm just a paycheck...." 

He looked up quizzically, noting that her face was even more sorrowful than before, "Are you alri..."

"Yes....I'm fine. Not like it matters anyway, I'm just your boss....not your friend." Rinoa got up stiffly, keeping her face turned away from him, "I'm thirsty.....I think I'll go and get myself a drink, do you want anything?" 

"No....are you okay?" the words sounded so foreign coming from him. Like he was speaking with someone else's voice. 

"I told you I'm fine! I just realized that my father was right, that's all......" She snapped, stalking away towards the concession stands. 

Rinoa tried to stay as calm as possible, but her heart was overwhelmed and in pain. God, she wouldn't let him see her cry. _Just a damn job to him. That's all I am_.....she though bitterly, hating that once again her father was right about something. _Bet he can't wait till we get back to Balamb and he can get rid of me_....the similarities between this situation and the one from her childhood was too much. Was she that worthless, that unlovable that no one could stand to be around her? _My life just sucks_...._people suck_.....The tears she tried so hard not to shed came heedless of her desire to stay strong and not hinge her emotional well being on one person.  She hid behind a tree, furiously wiping at her wet cheeks, hating herself for that bit of weakness. Zell chose that moment to bop on by and notice her. 

"Hey Rin--" He stopped, noticing the tears, "You okay? What happened..."

"Na-nahthing...." She said, her voice hitching with emotion. 

Another chance meeting, as if the gods had destined for her to be the most pitied and pathetic thing ever. Selphie walked by to join the gathering. _Great_...._so everybody can know what a huge loser I am_. 

"What are you guys up to? Why's Rinoa crying?....." She scowled, a note of warning entering her normally chipper tone, "Zell....what did you do?"

"Nothing....I just found her like this...."

"Guys....I'm okay....really...." She pleaded through desperate tears that she kept wiping away. 

Zell's brow knitted, annoyed that she'd try to hide her pain and not tell her friends,  "You are not....What's the matter??" 

"It's something my da--_THAT man_ said.....He said, you weren't my friends....and I was just a pay..."

"DON'T YOU EVEN FINISH THAT SENTENCE RINOA HEARTILLY!!" Selphie shouted indignantly, "I'll beat him up just for saying that! You're my friend!! I can't even believe you'd think that I wouldn't be!! You're the most fun to be with, and you're nice and funny....and you're the only one who doesn't make me feel like a stupid baby! So don't even say that!"

"For once I agree with her!" Zell nodded, pointing at Selphie, "Geesh! What's a guy gotta do to prove he's friends with you? Why'd you even believe your fa--I mean, Caraway anyway? I mean, you hate him right?" Rinoa nodded, "So, What in the world would make you think...." Zell paused, squinting as he thought, "....I know what this is about.....It starts with _S_ and end with _L_.....and is one big black clad block of stubborn stupid, am I right?" 

Rinoa nodded slightly, training her dark eyes on her ring as her fingers smoothed the surface. 

"That Squall....I'll beat him up too, for making my Noa cry!!" Selphie frowned, giving Rinoa a tight hug, "AW! Don't you even listen!! He's just being a butt! So be happy, 'KAY! Because I said, SO THERE!!" 

"Come on, Noa....How can you argue with that kind of logic?"

"Yeah.....I'm just right...." Selphie smiled, her arm still 'round Rinoa's shoulders, "Even Zell bows to my superior knowledge....." 

"Hey, I just agreed with you....Doesn't make you right about everything...." 

"Shhht! Don't fight it, Zell! I am a genius, and you will just have to accept it.....idiot that you are!" 

"THE HELL YOU SAY!!" 

Rinoa laughed, her tears dried as her friends cheered her up. Zell noticed her improved state and decided to postpone his burgeoning argument with Selphie.

"AHA! She smiles! Our plan has worked!! What say we get sumpin' to eat...."

"THEN WE GO ON THE VOMIT COMET, RIGHT!!" Selphie shouted excitedly. 

"Oh GAWD, NO!"  Irvine said, strolling up lazily behind the little cluster of friends, "Sorry, Seff.....but twenty times is nineteen too many...." 

"Awww....come on, ya wussies!!" Selphie whined, knowing it wouldn't work.

Irvine ignored her, "Say, what's going on here anyway? Some kind of secret meeting that I'm not invited to?" 

Selphie shook her head, "Nope.....Noa's feeling kinda bad because a _certain someone_ is a big mean jerk, and me 'n Zell were cheering her up!!....You can join the cheering up...The more the cheerier!" 

Zell rolled his eyes, "....Man, you're a Re-re...." 

"Your mother....." Selphie said, sticking out her tongue. 

"So what's got our lil' spitfire down today?" Irvine smiled, once again ignoring Selphie and this time Zell as they got into another war of words. He ruffled Rinoa's hair affectionately, in his mind there was nothing worse than a brokenhearted woman, "Case of the Squall related blues?" 

Rinoa frowned, batting at Irvine's hands, "Hey, does everybody have to know about my problems? Did  I send out a memo and just not remember?"

"No...but there's only one person I know who could make a beautiful creature like you cry and not immediately regret it!" She made a face, playfully flipping him off, "That's mah girl!!" He chuckled, glad to see that Rinoa still had that spunk, "It's gettin' late y'all.....I think we should pack it in and get back in the city." 

"Right..." Zell said, looking around in puzzlement,  "Um...Where's Quistis??" 

Irvine grimaced, gesturing towards the bathrooms, "She's in there......Done in by the Vomit Comet.....I guess it really earned its name..."

As if on cue, Quistis stumbled out of the bathroom, looking pale and slightly worst for wear. "Selphie....I'm going to kill you with my bare hands...." Quistis gave the young SeeD a dangerous look, holding her stomach, "Once I feel better....Can we go?"

Jokes and gentle insults were traded for a few more minutes, until the group decided to collect their most reclusive member.  Rinoa hung back with Zell and Selphie, pretending, very badly, that nothing was wrong. They exited the park in a tight group. Once again, Rinoa tried to keep her distance. It had been stupid of her to think that he liked her, what more would it take for her to just accept it?  Her thoughts were dark and unhappy, as she badgered herself into accepting what wasn't true. She frowned, pulling at a length of hair as she thought. Out of nowhere, he appeared next to her, it was so sudden and quiet, Rinoa was unsure of how long he'd been there.

"Are you alright? You were acting oddly." He queried, his stone face set, looking out at the horizon and not at her.

She stole a glance at him, she lied, "Yes....I was just feeling a little sick, but I'm better now."

".....When it's time, just stay close to me, alright?" His gaze fluidly turning from the sky to her. 

"...Buh...but why?" She stammered, staring into those amazing eyes, the same ice blue as the night she met him. _I wonder if he knows they change color like that_? 

"It'll be safer.....You were worried." 

She nodded numbly, suddenly losing the ability to form words. He said nothing more, increasing his pace so he was walking in front of her. She watched his back, heart pounding, wishing he'd either say he liked her or just push her away altogether. Swimming back and forth in a sea of indecision was becoming much too stressful_. Maybe I'll have to make the first move after all_....._Darn it, my life sucks_. _Not now though_....._just wait a little while longer_.

It was around six, dinner time, and a brief quarrel ensued over where to go. Irvine suggested a local pub, _Walt Flannigan's_, it served food that they'd be more familiar with, it was near where they had to be and it had a live band. They all agreed and took the next subway train over to the pub, arriving around a quarter after six. There was a small wait to get into the club, but before long they were seated. 

They ordered once the server came, chatting pleasantly while the band played softly. Their food soon came and while they ate, the band announced it was amateur night, inviting audience members onto the stage. Most people who came on stage and selected a song were worse than tone deaf. Every now and then someone would get up who could actually sing, but not often enough. Rinoa thought briefly of having a turn, but it had been a long time since the last time she sang. It was more than the simple fact that it'd been ages since she'd practice, but that she had no desire to sing. Whatever muse that had driven her when she was younger had long since left. _Besides, it's karaoke_..... Karaoke was an offense to the ears and enough to drive everyone at the table to the breaking point. They laughed and made jokes at the expense of the drunks and idiots who were fool enough to get up on the stage. 

Dinner winded down, it was almost eight o'clock and they'd soon have to take their positions. Rinoa was feeling much better, especially now that she realized she had friends. So what if Squall wasn't among them right now. He could be, if he wanted to, but that shouldn't stop her from enjoying herself. So she laughed and joked, content that she wasn't just a paycheck to Selphie, Zell and Irvine....and possibly Quistis. _Three out of five ain't bad_....she smiled inwardly..._besides_..._there was some progress made_. _Stay next to me_....those words were enough to give her slim hope. The bittersweet tinge of the morning's events faded, and the group momentarily forgot all sadness and worry. Becoming a group of teenagers on vacation, not just assassins posing as such. 

Technically, they were only in the city to do their job, but it had become much more. A group full of such disparate members began to knit the bonds of deep friendship. It was only in the beginning stages, and not one of them realized what had happened, but they were now more than just teammates. They were a group of friends, reunited after a long separation that none of them, save one,  even remembered. 

The day had been full and they'd all had fun, even Squall to some extent. It was almost a shame that it had to end so soon. Leaving Walt Flannigan's, the stopped briefly at Caraway's house to gather up some supplies before they left. At the gate, they split into their teams and left to go their separate ways.  Squall, Rinoa, and Irvine started towards the city square, making a right as they left from Caraway's mansion. Quistis, Zell and Selphie went down in the opposite direction, towards a less populous part of Deling City. 

AUHOR'S NOTES—

Well, here we are again! This is the second author notes section for this story!! WEEHA! Anyway, I guess I just wanted to apologize for the fluffiness of this chapter! I like to call Chapter 14 my character development time. I just didn't want to hurry along into the next event, I wanted some time for everyone to get to know each other. Plus, I think we needed some more time in Rinoa's head and to hear a little more about her past. Okay, it was a little self serving, but hopefully not too damn awful. I promise next chapter is actually related to story issues and not just character developy. 

I also want to thank all my reviewers!! I'm glad there are so many! I'd love for there to be more, but I can't help but appreciate each and everyone of you who enjoy reading this!! So THANK YOU!! *****huggseverybody* I love y'all! Hope I don't disappoint. Oh, and if you want a visual for the face Selphie gives Rinoa, go to my web page on my profile. You'll be hit in the face by the single most evil thing ever....that is the face she makes. Stare at it and try not to have your soul sucked out!!!  

See ya next chapter! Peace and love--Noacat


	15. Revelry in Dark Blue

Quistis felt screwed, her team had gotten the shit assignment, literally. Caraway had insisted they split into two groups, one would be the assassination team, the other the gateway team. The gateway team had to sneak into the large triumphal gate and at the appropriate time, they'd pull down the portcullis on either side of the gate. It sounded easy, but the only way to get into the gateway without being noticed was through the sewers. They'd made it to their access point, jimmying the cover with a crowbar. Discarding the crowbar, all three quickly made their way down the ladder into the bowels of Deling City's sewer system. 

Quistis flicked on her flashlight, signaling Zell and Selphie to do the same. She shouldn't have been surprised that it stunk, but there was still a healthy amount of unexpected revulsion at the smell. Quistis put her hand to her nose, closing her eyes and breathing shakily, trying to ward off the gag reflex. 

"EEEEEWWWW!! IT STINKS LIKE CRUD VAPORS IN HERE!!" Selphie shouted.

Zell whirled on her, "What the HELL is a crud vapor!?...That more of your stupid Trabia slang!!"

"Wull, it's ....you know....that sewer smell....that...well...you know, in the sewer and it stinks...."

"That's not crud vapors....it's poo gas.....Geesh!" Zell said, indignantly.

Quistis watched the entire exchange, annoyed by their pointless discussion, "Be quiet the both of you and focus on the mission....honestly!"

 The sharp tones of Quistis's voice silenced them immediately, realizing that she was in no mood for excess silliness. Though the smell was quite disarming, and complaining about anything else distracted from the stink. Quistis decided to be kind; digging in her pocket, she found a small can of citrus stuff that Caraway had given her. _He said that it'd help with the smell if you put it beneath your nostrils_.... Quistis was uncertain if what he said was true, but it was better than nothing...._really better than nothing_. Dipping a finger in, she smeared the waxy substance on her upper lip, immediately noticing the difference. 

Everything smelt cloyingly of oranges, but it beat the hell out of  the smell of rotting shit and god knows what else. She handed it to Selphie, who looked like she'd blow chunks at any moment. Once everyone had put the stuff on and regained control of their rolling stomachs, they started on their way. Caraway had given Quistis small schematics of the sewers, allowing her to navigate her way through the twists and turns. All three carefully made their way down the dank walkways in the sewer, stopping to check their position every few feet. None of them dared to speak, their footsteps echoing loudly in the cavernous space of the sewers. After several twists and turns, Quistis stopped. She looked down at the map, suddenly realizing that the last twenty minutes they'd walked had been a waste. _Shit. We're lost_. 

She announced this fact to her companions, who groaned in unison. The next five minutes were spent hurriedly trying to figure out where in the hell they were. Zell and Quistis argued over the details, grabbing the map from each other while trying to decide what to do. Selphie said nothing for a time, only the occasional whimper in pain to hurry them along. Finally, they agreed on where they'd gone wrong and backtracked. Both Zell and Quistis this time watched the map, slowly recounting where each turn should lead. They'd nearly traced their way all the way back to the entrance, wasting more time than anyone had intended. Now back on their route, the trio tried not to go too fast but time was still a factor. They had to hurry, all the while trying to be careful not to loose their way in the labyrinthine tunnels. Losing their way a second time was not an option. They entered a junction, walking towards a gated door with flashlights extended. 

"This is it...." Quistis whispered, not really knowing why she felt the need to be quiet. 

Approaching the door, she reached her hand out and grabbed the door handle. Expecting it to give easily, she was startled when it did not open. Quistis shook the handle, gate rattling underneath as she unleashed her fury on it. _AW! FUCK ME_!

"AW! Fuck me! Is it locked?" asked Zell, his voice echoing loudly in the dark. 

Quistis looked around strangely, half wondering if he'd read her mind, "Yes." 

"Shit!" Selphie cursed, holding her stomach, she couldn't bear much more of this. 

Quistis and Zell looked back at her in awe, never in a million years did they expect her to swear. Quistis shrugged, this was not a time to think about crap like this. When had everyone become so foolish? Especially herself. Focusing on inane details that helped nothing. 

"Any ideas?" She asked.

Zell shrugged, "Well, a good fire spell'd blow it off its hinges."

"Yeah. That'd do it. Only one problem."

"What?" 

Quistis pointed upward, shining her flashlight on the miles of pipes above them. 

"See those green black ones, with the yellow stripes?" He mumbled an affirmative, "Those are the city's gas lines. One of those ruptures while you're casting that spell and this whole place'd blow. Taking us and at least ten city blocks with it. No way. No magic." 

"FUCK! Well I'm out of ideas...." 

The SeeDs stood quietly, each furtively thinking about their options. They could go around, but all of them knew it would take too long. If they hadn't gotten lost, that would be one thing, but they had and there was precious little time to spare. Quistis's mind worked quickly, groping for any option she hadn't thought of. The metallic squeak of the water wheel next to her interrupted her thought. At first she was annoyed, but then as she gazed at the device, a thought came to her. The wheel was attached to the gate; a small clearance between the ceiling and the machine was just large enough for a human to slip through. 

"Guys....Follow me." 

She stuffed her flashlight down her shirt and held the map in her mouth, preparing to mount the paddle wheel. Quistis grabbed hold of the wheel's struts, lifting herself up onto it. Her feet finding holds in the wheel's buckets. She steadied herself at the top of the wheel, grabbing hold of a pipe snaking just above it. With unparalleled grace, she lowered herself down the other side of the wheel. Jumping down on the flip side of the gate with a triumphant smile. 

"What're you two waiting for? Get over here!"

Neither where about to object, but both felt there was no way they'd get over as easily as she had. Selphie went first, clumsily climbing up and over the wheel. On the other side she nearly fell in the water, and it was only due to Quistis's steadying hands that she didn't. Zell went next, quickly scrambling up the wheel like a monkey. He was up and over, and glad to be done with it. They continued on, all wishing they were anyplace but here. With each step, they prayed that the exit was closer. That an end to their suffering would come. Instead they were greeted by the seemingly endless twists and turns of the sewer. More of the orange stuff was doled out, mostly to Selphie. 

Zell tried to busy himself with other thoughts, though it was hard. _Ooh! Poison draw point_...he thought idly as he walked through it, wondering what a draw point would be doing down here. He shrugged, _maybe it's for the sewer workers to poison rats with. Who cares. Mine now_. He stopped quickly, closing his eyes as he drew from it and junctioned as much of the spell as he could store. Quickly jogging, he caught up with the girls who hadn't noticed his absence. Perhaps he'd share with them once they'd stopped. 

The walk continued, the trio tiring with every step. Each silently wondering if this place actually ended at some point. Dull footsteps clacking emptily in the dark. The smell of rot penetrating their senses. They'd all actually acclimated to the smell somewhat. Occasionally, they'd hear some kind of soft splash or the scurry of tiny feet against wet concrete. All in all, it was the most disgusting and creepy experience Quistis had ever had. 

"Trepe Sempai, Are we there yet?" Selphie moaned, tugging on the back of Quistis's shirt.

"Call me Quistis....and no....we're not.....so stop tugging on my shirt already." Quistis said, giving half a thought to tossing her into the mucky water that flowed through the middle of the floor. 

"I think I'm gonna puke if we don't get out of here soon.....we there yet?" Selphie whined, with a childish pout.

"I'm going to puke if you say that one more time...." Zell snapped, feeling just as sick as she.

Quistis gave her more of the citrus stuff, she was tempted to tease the younger SeeD. _This was karmic payback for making me go on that damned ride over and over again. _But she suppressed it, she was, after all, the superior officer. Instead, she tried to encourage her, "Hang on, we'll be there soon."

The sewers seemed endless, hallway after dark hallway they kept walking, sludge covering the walls and floors. Trying not to look at the things floating in the water, and most of all not thinking about what those floating things might be. They had almost used up the citrus stuff and it seemed that they'd ever find the exit. Selphie was at her limit, she'd stopped whining, holding her hand to her stomach. Her face was terribly pale and she looked as if any minute she'd barf all over herself. Quistis was convinced that if Selphie ralphed, so would she, then Zell would probably puke. Turning the mission into a hork-o-rama, and as silly as it sounded, the thought didn't strike Quistis as funny at all. In the end, no one got sick, they found the final access port a few minutes later.  

They all quickly clanked up the ladder, eager to make it to some place other than the sewers. A place with air that didn't smell of purification and death. Where creepy, icky things didn't scuttle over your foot as you walked. In all, it had taken an almost an hour and a half to make their way through the sewer, seemingly the longest hour and a half in her life. An hour and a half she wished that she could forget. Quistis wanted a bath very, very badly. Her one and only consuming thought was to have a shower, the kind of shower that would flay the stink off her skin. She shook herself, focusing at the job at hand, she peeked out the tiny window of the gateway. Glancing quickly down at her watch. They had sometime to relax before they had to work. _Still, We should get into position,_ she thought, turning to Zell. 

"Zell, take your radio and go down to the first floor. When the clock strikes ten, it'll be your job to watch for the float. There should be a door, with a small window....as well as a few on the front and side....watch from there....the minute the ENTIRE float enters the gateway, you call up and tell me to drop it, got that?"

"Shore thang, Mama Jama..." 

She handed him the radio giving him her typical look of disapproval and he hopped over to the ladder, sliding down it like a daredevil idiot. Just to make sure the radios worked, she called him. A moment later he answered her back, his voice crackling over the receiver. She walked over to one of the portcullis controls, reading the simple instructions on the steel plate next to the large switch. She was surprised not to find any guards or city workers in the gateway. _You'd think that they'd have someone watching this place._...She shrugged it off, her place wasn't to question why, it was to do. Quistis looked out at the gathering crowd from the narrow window. She hoped that Squall and the others were doing as well or better than they were. _At least they didn't have walk through shit._...

Squall and his group were doing fine, they'd managed to waste some time wandering around Deling City. Irvine and Rinoa chatted amiably, that is when Irvine didn't say something that pissed Rinoa off, urging her to swat him. Squall had fallen into one of his introspective moods that always hit right before battle. They tried to include him in conversation, but gave up when he wouldn't answer. Finally, around 9 o'clock, Squall stopped being quiet long enough to insist that they make it over to the Presidential Palace and take up their position. Rinoa and Irvine agreed, walking through the dense crowd filling the streets. A sudden and eerie hush came over all three of them, as if they all realized at once the importance of their mission. 

Rinoa felt herself overtaken by a strange feeling of dread, and the closer she got to the palace, the more palpable it got. The building loomed over her, a choking fear suffocated Rinoa as she came to the edge of the palace, and she could hardly breathe.

She winded in and out of the crowd, keeping an eye on Irvine's back so she wouldn't get lost. Soldiers and security surround the gate that lead into the palace. Despite the outward show, a crowd had gathered and was milling near the entrance. The guards watched passively, unable to keep an eye on everyone at once. The three of them moved in as close as they could without alarming security. They waited next to the gate, staring straight ahead, biding their time until the Sorceress made her first appearance. 

She'd been in battle situations before, it was nothing new. Something was desperately wrong this time, and for the first time in her life she was truly afraid. She'd tried to get Squall and Irvine's attention, but nothing had worked. They had focused so completely, that they didn't notice her increasing agitation. 

She felt so strange, a change flowering deep within her, like a force inside her was compelling her to do something but she didn't know what. Her hands began to tingle, as if they'd fallen asleep due to loss of blood flow. Rinoa scowled, shaking and moving her hands in an attempt to relieve herself of the irritation. She tried to ignore it, tried to turn her mind to other things to no avail. There was something here, she could hear it....a malevolent presence, so cold and heartless that it seemed to suck the warmth out of everything it touched. She looked up at the brightly lit palace, her mind spinning dizzily. _Something is going to happen_......_but what_? _Why do I feel like I should leave_? 

The tingling in her hands went suddenly from simple mild irritation to unbearable searing pain. It was as if the pain in her hands was responding to her query, pushing her forward, towards an uncertain end. The more she tried to focus on the mission, the worse it got. Rinoa closed her eyes, balling her fists as tears formed at the corners of her eyes. She inhaled and exhaled slowly, trying very hard not to cry, forcing herself to focus on anything but the pain. 

Energy was building inside her small frame, the full manifestation of her gift edging its way painfully to the surface of her consciousness. Her stomach churned, she opened her eyes, looking up at the dark sky she remembered her dream...._the dark woman in the sky_.  She shuddered, a voice she barely recognized as her own whispered to her...._it's time to go_.... every instinct in her body pushing her to move away from her companions. Irvine and Squall were still wrapped up in their own world and wouldn't miss her if she just slipped off for a bit. Slowly, she walked away, glancing behind her at Irvine and Squall. She hoped they'd understand that she had to do this, whatever it was. 

Letting her feelings guide her, she winded her way around the back of the palace, finding an unguarded entrance. As if someone were expecting her.....She balked for a moment. Realizing it could be a trap and despite her rising fear, she entered the palace. The door lead to a large, empty kitchen, she walked through it quickly, her footsteps clacking noisily on the tiled floor. She exited the kitchen, coming to a deserted hallway in the servants quarters. She started to jog through the hallways, amazed that there seemed to be no one around. Ducking down hallway after hallway, she made her way through the maze-like palace. She had no idea where she was leading herself, yet somehow she knew how to get there by some unseen guide within her. After countless turns, stairways, and long halls...she found herself standing in front of a large pair of ornate doors. The pain in her palms spiked, hurting so much that she winced, causing her to clasp her quivering hands together. Shaking out the feeling, she reached for the large gold door handles, and pulled them open. 

The heavy doors creaked as they opened slowly, revealing a sparsely decorated room. Rinoa stepped in, looking around with trepidation. The dimly lit room was illuminated by candles alone, gauzy strips of muslin draped from the high ceiling. In the middle of the room, she could see a woman sitting serenely on a throne, her back to Rinoa. She watched, entranced by the vision through the filmy curtains that wafted in and out with the slightest breeze. Rinoa stepped farther into the room, approaching the woman in the chair cautiously.

 The dark woman suddenly stood up, giving Rinoa a start, turning slowly to regard the intruder. She was tall and dressed in a dark purple dress, skin tight with a low collar that was trimmed with black feathers. The woman was extremely pale, her skin a dead white, bluish veins running across her temples like some kind of disease. She wore an ornate crown that covered her head, beads dangling from its spires, jingling eerily with every graceful movement. The two women stood there, stopped in time, staring into each other's eyes. Rinoa's heart beat faster, breathing heavily....feelings of fear and doom washing over her entire body. The woman looked at Rinoa, her reptilian eyes giving her the once over.....sizing her up. The Sorceress could feel the gathering power flowing through Rinoa's body. Recognizing one of her own, the Sorceress knew that the young lady standing before her had no idea of the power she held in her hands. This thought amused the Sorceress to no end, and it made her smile joylessly. 

The tingling in her hands started up again, now spreading to her arms. Rinoa resisted the strange urge to hold out her hands. Scared and slightly weirded out that she felt the need to do something so entirely stupid and inappropriate. She wanted to say something to the woman, but nothing came out when she opened her mouth. Rinoa clasped at her throat. _What was going on_....The woman smiled, her purple lips twisting unpleasantly into the resemblance of a smile. It suddenly dawned on Rinoa, her stomach clenching in fear,  _The dark woman from my dream_......... Before Rinoa could do anything, the large doors behind her began to shut on their own. Rinoa spun around, running for the door but she was too late. She turned to stare in horror as the sorceress sauntered closer to her, the same sick smile on her face. 

"Foolish girl....What do you think you could do to me?" the Sorceress sneered, making a gesture with her clawed hand. 

Rinoa felt her right arm vibrating, quickly clamping her left hand over it, temporarily resisting the Sorceress's control. She looked up, the Sorceress tilted back her head and laughed softly, her deep voice echoing in the empty room. Edea smiled, baring her teeth, licking at her sharpened canines. With a nimble flick of a wrist she jerked Rinoa off her feet with her will alone, holding the girl a few feet above the floor.....dangling in midair by one arm. Rinoa looked down at the Sorceress, her eyes wide with fear, helplessly unable to resist. Between the force of the Sorceress's grip and the weight of her own body, her arm throbbing in pain. Rinoa cried out soundlessly, closing her eyes and instinctively concentrating her entire being on releasing the Sorceress's hold on her.  It didn't work; she continued to hang there, shaking in fear. 

"You are powerful, girl...but not enough to defy me...."  The Sorceress snarled, loosing her smile and flinging Rinoa into a wall with a single graceful gesture. 

She hit the wall with an unceremonious thump; her body going limp as she slid down it. It wasn't enough to kill her, but she did blackout temporarily. Waking quickly, Rinoa lifted herself up, shaking the dizziness from her head. Glaring at the Sorceress, with all her heart she wanted to strike her back, but she couldn't think of what to do. The Sorceress took hold of her arm again, pulling Rinoa ever closer as she turned around. Rinoa stood behind the Sorceress, struggling...clawing at her arm, trying to free herself. She couldn't scream, couldn't stop her.... _Oh God help me_...

Pausing for a moment, the Sorceress gathered more power. Tilting back her head and with a push of her will, metallic spines flashed out of her shoulder blades, like golden wings. The spines quickly transformed into an elaborate metal collar, mounted on her back like a fan. On the last spine on either side of the fan, floated two large single strips of translucent pink fabric, which caught the breeze fetchingly as she moved. She walked gracefully towards the door, the sound of tinkling bells following her as she dragged her prey behind her. The Sorceress lifted a hand, rippling the surface of the door, allowing her to pass through it without having to bother with the knob. She pulled Rinoa along with her, arriving on the balcony of the Presidential Palace. Deling had already started his speech, finally introducing the Sorceress to the cheering crowd. Her entrance was lauded with shouts of joy, confetti erupting from the frenzied crowd. The President backed off as the Sorceress Edea, took the podium. She looked over the crowd, smirking with contempt at the weak-minded idiots below. 

"You pathetic fools...What happened to the Sorceress of your nightmares? The evil demon that would seduce your husbands, and kill your children. Once my kind was a vision of fear, even the mention of the word would pale the strongest amongst you. As I look over this crowd, I see nothing but base adulation, false reverence. How weak you've all become. So easily mislead....Look at what little effort it's taken me to manipulate you. Even your own President was fooled, deceived by his own greed. Now I stand before you to take my rightful place as your leader....bow to me....Your Empress...." She spit the words out, lifting her hands arrogantly over the cheering crowd. 

"Edea.....What are you doing?" Deling gasped, running for the podium, "I thought we agreed..." 

"I agreed to nothing...." she replied coldly, her eyes glittering with malice. 

Without looking, she grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and lifted him with one arm. A dark light flitting from between her fingers enveloped the President's form as he struggled to release himself from Edea's grip. Tendrils of green smoke began to emanate from his body as the Sorceress's poison worked its way through his body. Deling writhed in pain as the dark magic rotted his flesh instantly before the eyes of the crowd. He flailed and screamed, organs and skin boiling and bleeding with unnatural sickness, the crowd roaring with pleasure as their former President burst into greenish flames. Edea threw down his smoking corpse, which continued bubbling and dissolving on the floor as the darkness consumed him. Roiling and smoldering until there was nothing left but a greasy mess on the floor next to the podium. The crowd didn't seem to mind in the least. 

"Now, there is nothing to stand in my way. We'll burn the world until there's nothing left. Follow me into a new age of destruction. Where death will reign supreme, the blood of the innocent will flow....and every last one of you will pay with your life." Edea smiled unpleasantly, as the crowd cheered. She dragged Rinoa forward, so the audience could see her, "We'll begin this new era with a sacrifice.....Welcome oblivion with open arms."

From below, Squall and Irvine couldn't believe what had happened, Deling was dead......and no one seemed to care. It seemed like everyone but them was under some kind of spell. Mass hypnosis, what else could explain their favorable reaction to the proclamation of their own death? _But why isn't it affecting us_? At a loss, the whole scene seriously disturbed Squall and Irvine, really comprehending the urgency to complete this mission successfully. This Sorceress had to be stopped at all costs. She intended a full scale war....a horrible repeat of the war that almost destroyed the world twice over. Neither of them could allow that. 

The clock struck ten and Irvine turned to say something to Rinoa, who'd been behind him only a moment before. She was gone, his eyes darted back and forth, looking for her....._Where could she have gone._ He yanked at Squall's arm, rapidly informing him of Rinoa's absence. Squall paled, his heart leaping in his chest, he swung around.... scanning the crowd for some sign of where she might have gone. Looking up, Squall was horrified to see her on the podium with the Sorceress. She was holding her arm out, her face contorted in fear while she struggled with some unseen force. Irvine stopped and looked up to see what Squall was staring at. _What was Rinoa doing up there_...._oh god_...They stood there, watching with mouths wide open, not knowing what they should do. 

Suddenly, Edea lifted a hand in the air, gathering a ball of dark matter in her opened palm and flinging it towards the crowd. It whizzed over the awed spectators, crackling through the air and disappearing into the marble gateway. A crumbling sound came from the Triumphal gate, as the large stone dragons decorating it came to life. Two of them peeling themselves from the facade of the building and bounding towards the Palace through the crowd. The crowd parted quickly, cheers turning to screams of terror. The Sorceress flung Rinoa backwards, leaving her to be devoured by the charging dragons. Edea then turned from the melee she'd created, walking calmly down the catwalk to mount her float.  

The dragons leapt up to the Palace balcony and towards Rinoa. The Sorceress's control over her body and voice had been lifted; Rinoa realized she had only a few minutes to act. She back peddled, flinging the doors wide open, running desperately into the room she'd just left. In her panic she tripped and fell to her knees. She looked back, her eyes widening in terror as they viewed the monsters Edea had sent to kill her. 

They were a much larger version of a local lizard that inhabited the region. Iguions were a small reptile, known for it's distinctive yellow-green coloring and aggressive nature. Due to their fierce temperament, they were nicknamed Prairie Dragons by the locals. This small, not too useful fact ran through Rinoa's head as she stared at the monoliths in front of her. The dragons watched her from the balcony, ready to pounce, their tails flicking menacingly, muscles tensing as they prepared to kill. 

The first dragon crouched down, lunging suddenly at Rinoa. She threw her hands forward, screaming, pushing at the air with her palms. The doors slammed shut on the airborne dragon. Tumbling headlong into the heavy oak door, the dragon shook itself and started to ram into it, splintering wood. The crowd was unable to see what happened, all they heard was a scream and then silence. Squall and Irvine watched helplessly, not knowing what was happening to their friend. All the time assuming the worst. 

"SHIT!" Irvine shouted, making a move to rush in,  "We have to go get her!!"

Squall stopped him with a look, "No, we have to wait until the gates open....that's our only way in..."

"WHO CARES?! RINOA'LL BE DEAD BY THEN....WE HAVE TO GO NOW!" Irvine snapped back, shoving his way past Squall. He hadn't forgotten what Leonhart had done to Rinoa that afternoon, nor had he forgiven. 

"Kinneas..." grabbing his coat and swinging him around, "We can't help her, if they catch us....Wait...."

Irvine shook off Squall's grip, reluctantly agreeing to wait. He didn't like Squall's attitude, where did he get off being that cold, especially to his own teammate. Hell, Irvine didn't know Rinoa that well, but he cared enough to rush to her aid. There was no way she could ward those things off. She didn't have a weapon and being a civilian, she had no magic. Irvine brooded angrily, _we won't  get there in time_...._she's gonna die while we sit here, doing nothing_. All he could do is hope, that by some miracle she'd be able to hang on long enough. If she was dead when they got there, he'd tear Leonhart's head off with his bare hands. The gates suddenly creaked open, music blaring from behind the walls of the Palace. A large float slowly made its way out of the entrance, followed by a group of tribal dancers gyrating behind it.  While everyone was distracted, Squall and Irvine snuck through the gate.

 Once inside, Squall called up from memory the layout of the Palace as Caraway had shown him. He dragged Irvine down corridor after corridor until they reached the doors that lead to the balcony. Jiggling the handles....locked. He smashed his shoulder into the door, it didn't budge. Irvine took a cue and helped him, smashing his shoulder into it. Both of them bashing at the door, until it gave way.....bursting open into a completely dark room. Simultaneously, the doors from the other side suddenly cracked, splitting apart to reveal the dragons on the balcony. A shrill scream coming from a corner of the room. _Rinoa_... Both dragons leaped forward, hunting for the source of the sound.  Squall cursed himself, neither of them had weapons. Caraway had told them that he'd sneak them into the Palace himself....telling them it'd be too dangerous for them to carry them out in public. Luckily, Irvine had thought fast and had summoned his GF, Leviathan. 

The god of water loomed above the Iguions, they were nothing to him. Letting out a piercing shriek, Leviathan summoned a giant wall of water and set it loose on his enemies. The tsunami engulfed the Iguions, drowning their struggling forms in a roiling torrent of water. They fought the surge in vain, the crushing power of the Water God was too much. Leviathan sensed that it was nearly the end, easing the tide only when he was sure the Iguions were dead. Their limp bodies slid across the floor, still wet from the attack. Squall walked into the room, it was still dark and hard to see, even with the light from the hallway and the balcony. 

"Rinoa....." Irvine called, scanning the room, turning around to face the doorway they'd just entered from. 

"Where is she..." Squall asked, looking around, when he saw movement behind a set of floor length curtains. 

Pushing his way through the opaque muslin, he found Rinoa cowering in the corner. She was shaking all over and cradling her right arm, her eyes wild with fear. He knelt down and gently touched her shoulder. She looked up at him, taking a moment or two before her face dawned with recognition. He helped her up, taking her hand in his own. The minute she was on her feet, she wrapped her arms around his neck. 

"I w-w-was so scared..." she said, trembling and sobbing as she held onto him. 

Squall stood there, with a look of befuddled surprise, staring at Irvine for help. He'd find none there, Irvine prided himself on knowing how to read the hearts of women. He wasn't needed here....Irvine just smiled and tipped his hat before he left them alone. _Besides, boy needs to redeem himself after that stunt he pulled_… Squall scowled, standing there with Rinoa hanging all over him. He held his hands out, looking completely confused and helpless. 

"Why'd you go and leave like that? You could've been hurt....." Squall chided awkwardly, shying away from physical contact with her. 

"I don't know.....I don't know why I left...." She looked up at him with her tear stained face, letting go of him and holding out her arm, "....I don't know what's happening to me....I'm so afraid.....t-t-the Sorceress.....look..." She pulled back the knit arm guard she always wore, to show Squall her arm. There was a large bluish-brown bruise that traveled all the way around her small wrist. He looked down at it, his brow furrowing with concern,  "s-s-Sh-She did it.........She lifted me up off the g-ground....but not with her hand....I couldn't get away......I..I'm sorry........."  

The more she tried to explain, the more hysterical she got until she was unable to do anything but cry. Her words dissolved into sobbing and she grabbed onto his arm for support. 

 "Okay, you really need to let me go now....everything's alright....I'm here...Irvine's here....you're okay......Come on...Get off me already...." She shook her head violently. He looked down at her, letting out an exasperated sigh. Closing his eyes, he put a hand to his forehead,  "Could you please let go....just for a second? You know, I can't have you hanging on my arm...." She shook her head again, now he was just irritated, "Let me go....._Now_"

 There was something about the way he said that last word, an edge to his voice that told her it'd be best to do as he asked. Rinoa let go, her hands slipping from his jacketed arm. He pulled back sharply, giving her a dirty look for invading his personal space. Straightening the arm of his jacket where she'd clung, Squall turned and left. _So much for progress_, Rinoa thought glumly. She padded after Squall, over to the access panel that lead to the attic of the Palace. At the height of the parade, when the Sorceress's float drove through the triumphal arch, a large carousel was to pop out of the roof of the Palace. Caraway had told them it was the perfect spot to take the shot from. The panel wasn't far from where they were and it was only a short jaunt. 

They shuffled up the small stairwell that led to the attic. Irvine was waiting there, he'd found the rifle he was to use, holding it while preparing himself. Squall's gunblade and Rinoa's pinwheel lay next to him, they both bent down to pick up their weapons. Squall held his gunblade, feeling its weight in his hands. It was good to have it back. Kneeling down, he went over plans with Irvine, while Rinoa stood there. 

She was still recovering from her brief scare but feeling much better than she had been. She sat down, quietly waiting for the parade to reach its apex. The short meeting ended, Irvine sat down to gather his inner resources for what he'd have to do. Sitting quietly in a far corner, meditating over his rifle. Squall sat down next to Rinoa, stretching his back in preparation for a long wait. He looked over at the girl next to him, idly picking at stray strings on her knit duster. Her quietness bothered him. He liked it better when she was annoying, the thought made no sense to him, but then again, neither did she.  

"So, what did you mean about your father being right?"

"Huh?" Rinoa shook herself, surprised at the voice that addressed her. 

Squall looked at her blankly, "Earlier today. You said something about him being right, about what?" 

"Nothing....Everything. It's hard to explain." She shrugged, unable to vocalize her feelings, "It's just a thing I have. My whole life he's thrown my failures in my face, without even acknowledging his own. It bugs me. He's so self righteous. Anyway, not like you have to worry 'bout it."

"Why wouldn't I?" Squall asked, surprising himself by even asking the question. 

"Well....I mean. It's just......" Rinoa stammered, obviously just as surprised as he, "You're not like the others. I'm just a client to you, so....I just don't want to bother you, that's all." 

"You really hate him, don't you?"

Rinoa nodded, her brow furrowed in thought, "What about you? With Seifer, I mean. You all seem to hate Seifer a whole lot. Not that he's my best friend but....Anyway, I guess if we're asking questions here, why did you hate him so much?"

"Because he was an arrogant dickhead and a bully." Squall said simply, "Why do you hate your father so much?" 

"Long list or short?" Rinoa asked, smiling wryly, garnering a confused look from Squall, "Sorry, bad joke. I guess the biggest reason, is because after my mom's funeral... he left....didn't even say good bye to me. And if that wasn't enough, two days after the funeral my nanny gets me up early and packs me on the next train to my very first boarding school. He hasn't been my father since that day. Just Caraway." She paused in her narrative, looking at Squall thoughtfully, "How'd you get that scar?"

"Seifer."

"He gave you that?!" Rinoa gasped in shock, "How?"

"Training.....he cheated, blinded me with a fire spell and then..." He made a motion with his hand to indicate how the blade had cut him.

"Ow! So....what brought on this sudden bout of talkativeness? Is the whole, _I hate people, leave me alone _thing an act or....you just in a good mood?" 

He shrugged, staring dimly at the wall, "Bored. Filling space with pointless conversation. Isn't that what most people do?" 

"_Well, at least I rate higher than boredom_...." she said inaudibly. 

"Hmm? You say something?"

"No....You know.....Can I tell you something?" 

"Sure, whatever." He shrugged, pretending not to care, but secretly wondering what she would say. 

"Caraway wanted me to go to Garden. He laughed at me when I said I wanted to go to Timber Fine Arts.....told me I was going to Garden, that I had no choice about it. So I ran away. He'd never let me go like that, _never_. Treats me like one of his stupid soldiers, not like a daughter. I hate him so much....." She seethed, feeling tears coming on, she closed her eyes to gain her composure. Opening them when she was ready to continue,  "I'm really surprised that I got out of there. I was half expecting him to drag me off, or lock me in a room.....So, I guess I just wanted to thank you. I'd still be there if it wasn't for you and Quistis."

He listened patiently, nodding nonchalantly, "No big deal. Just doing my job." 

"I know.....still.... it means a lot to me." She said quietly, looking over at him with a small smile on her face, "Thanks..."

He met her gaze, pale blue eyes sparkling in an impassive face, "You're welcome." 

Rinoa felt a light blush creep up into her face and she quickly turned away. She bit her lip nervously, heart hammering in her chest. _What should I do? Should I ask him?_ She glanced at him, he'd closed his eyes in meditation. _Conversation time is over_. Rinoa sighed and stretched, leaning on the wall of the clock tower. She looked up at the ceiling and waited silently. 

Below, the procession slowly moved forward through the street, spectators pressing in on each side of the street to get a glimpse of the Sorceress. The crowd reacting with gasps of surprise at her strange beauty. Dancers in wild costumes whipped around the float, shaking to the rhythmic music pounding from the band that marched in front of it. Streamers of all colors flying through the air, taking flight on the early summer breeze. Brief displays of fireworks popping, exploding in the sky with a deafening bang. Dazzling showers of confetti, littering the air like a bizarre multicolored snowstorm. The Sorceress sat atop her float, resplendent amongst the luxuriantly decorated throne. She smiled and waived, reveling in her new position as Empress. The entire street erupting in a cacophony of sound and colors as the float trundled toward the gateway. 

Author notes—

Heh-heh—Whoever said I'd be cutting out the sewer scene!!? *bats eyes innocently*  Anyway, stay tuned for the next chapter....it's gonna be a loo loo. ^-^


	16. With or Without You

_Sleight of hand and twist of fate—On a bed of nails she makes me wait. And I wait, without you._

_My hands are tied, my body's bruised, she's got me with—Nothing to win and nothing left to loose_

_And you give yourself away---And you give yourself away._

_And you give, and you give and you give yourself away._

_With or without you, with or without you.--I can't live, with or without you. _

_Lyrics by U2__._

Quistis and the others watched the parades progress from their perch in the gateway. She pulled out her binoculars, peering at the tiny form of the Sorceress. There was little security surrounding her, only one guard. _Strange_....Quistis squinted, taking a closer look at the lone guard. She gasped, the coat he was wearing....a gray trench coat, decorated with red iron crosses on the sleeves....He turned so she could see his face....the blond spiked hair, the scar running left to right down his face...._Seifer_...he was alive and he was guarding the Sorceress. 

Quistis dropped her hands at her sides, not knowing what else to do. _It was a trivial matter, who cares if he guarded her_..._she'd be dead soon anyway._  Quistis thought, still worried at Seifer's reappearance, _Did Galbadia Garden betray us?_....._Did they know Seifer was still alive and working for the Sorceress? What should I tell Zell and Selphie_.....Quistis decided not to say anything, reasoning that if they knew, it would just be a distraction. They should concentrate on making sure they completed their mission. 

She tried not to think about it too much, pushing the thought away as the parade winded down the street, but it was always in the back of her mind. _How could he betray us?_...._He has to know what that woman is. What she wants. Even with all his problems, he has to know. What is he thinking? Is he thinking at all? Maybe she's controlling him somehow.  Doesn't matter_, she reasoned with herself, _We just have to do our job. And if he gets in the way_...._well_.... She sighed heavily, focusing on the task at hand. It wasn't her job to speculate about Seifer, she was here to kill the Sorceress and that was all. The float neared the gateway, Quistis brought up her binoculars again to monitor the parade. 

The front of the float nosed its way into the gateway slowly, preceded by dozens of dancers, their feathered costumes flickering with their every movement.  Zell watched from the small window as the dim interior of the gateway was illuminated by the flaming urns on the float. He stepped up on tip-toe, jumping back in revulsion at his first good look at the Sorceress. His view was blocked by one of the large urns, glimpsing her through the flicker of flames. She was hideous, her ghostly pale face a vision of a demon in hell. Zell scrambled to the other side of the first level, checking if the float was all the way in. Glancing outside, he clicked on his radio, "QUISTIS! FIRST GATE NOW!!"

She signaled Selphie, who smacked the switch to release the first portcullis. Quistis dashed over to the other switch to make ready for the next signal. The radio erupted again, the final signal, Quistis slammed her fist on the release button. Both gateways came crashing down, trapping the surprised Sorceress just as the carousel popped out of the roof of the palace. 

Squall and his team swooped upwards with the carousel, going from near darkness to light in a few seconds. Irvine swiftly shouldered his rifle, his hands shaking with fear. He'd never shot at a live human target before and was beginning to get the jitters. He couldn't stop his hands from trembling. If it didn't stop soon, there was no way he could shoot. Looking through the scope he tried to aim but it was no use, he couldn't do it. Despondently, Irvine dropped the rifle, letting it clatter to the floor. Squall and Rinoa staring at him with disbelief. 

"I-I-I can't....." 

"What.....you can't what...." Squall stammered, hoping to god he didn't mean he couldn't shoot. The carousel was rising fast, they'd only have one chance. 

"I can't shoot....I've never.....My hands are shaking too much, I can't do it."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN!! YOU CAN'T!!" Squall shouted, his eyes widening in total disbelief, _damned cocky Cowboy, I KNEW he was all talk_....."THERE IS NO CAN'T! SHOOT HER FOR FUCKS SAKE!!" 

"ARE YOU DEAF?!...MY HANDS ARE SHAKING TOO MUCH... I CAN'T DO IT!! AS IN, I CAN'T SHOOT!! I WILL CHOKE IF I TRY!!" 

"....HOW CAN YOU MISS!! SHE'S RIGHT THERE!! POINT THE GUN AND SHOOT HER IN THE GOD DAMNED HEAD!!!" Squall barked, jabbing a finger at his head wildly. 

"I'M TELLING YOU...I CAN'T!!" 

Squall breathed in deeply and pushed back his initial anger. He had to find a way to motivate the Cowboy. His voice quavering he said as calmly as he could, "Alright...I know you're nervous.....but we only have a few more seconds....think of it as...as..." he stopped, grasping at straws before inspiration struck, "....it's a trial run....you're only practicing.....please, we only have one chance at this...it doesn't even matter if you miss...just try!"  

Irvine looked at Squall and slowly picked up his rifle. Taking a deep breath, he aimed, looking through the scope,  "_Only practice_...."  The crosshairs coming to rest on the Sorceress's head... "_a trial run_...".his heart softly pounding....breathing shallowly...... every movement so slow, deliberate....  the Sorceress turned around as she sat on her throne, facing the carousel..... "..._like shooting were rats with my T-16 back home_..." narrowing his eyes....sliding his finger towards the trigger....inhaling deeply....he squeezed. The gun went off, the sound like a clap of thunder, propelling the bullet towards the target. The gunshot instantly sent the entire crowd into chaos, soldiers, police, and spectators running wild in panic. He watched the melee through his scope, hoping to see the bullet hit. The tiny projectile hurtling towards the Sorceress. Edea stood up quickly, snapping her hand out, instantly erecting a flashing barrier of light.  Halting the bullet's progress mere inches away from hitting her, it spun there for a moment in mid-air and then it fell to the ground. Irvine watched it all through his scope, getting angry at himself and throwing down his rifle in disgust.

"SHIT!! SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT!!" he screamed, hitting the side of the carousel with his fist.

"What....What happened?" Rinoa asked, "You hit her right??"

"No..."

"Fuck!" Squall cursed quietly, walking towards the edge of the carousel, gunblade drawn.

"You missed?" Rinoa said, trying not to sound too disappointed. 

"No...I didn't miss, my aim was fine...I would've hit her but somehow she blocked it. Some kind of fucking barrier..."  Irvine replied, annoyed that they both didn't have more faith in him. He looked up at Squall about to say something to him about it and almost had a heart attack....Squall was standing on the ledge of the carousel, and he looked ready to jump,  "Hey, What do you think you're doing......."

"I'm completing the mission...." he said softly, leaping off the side of the carousel, gunblade raised over his head. 

Rinoa and Irvine dashed forward, watching him take a spectacular dive off the roof of the Palace. Landing without injury on the ground below. They looked at each other, their faces reflecting twin looks of shock. _It had to be at least ten feet_...._son of a bitch_....Irvine thought, looking over at Rinoa. She stood up suddenly and ran back through the curtained room, towards the front exit. 

_I'm not a crazy SeeD_..._ can't leap off buildings in a single bound_..._but I can sure as hell follow him_...she mused, before Irvine caught her wrist. She swung around, scowling at Irvine. 

"Hey....Where the hell do you think you're going?" 

"After Squall...."

"No...I don't think so...."

Rinoa snatched her arm back, growling with menace, "Don't tell me what to do, what is it with you people!?....We can't very well leave him on his own...."

"Yes, we can....Sunshine can take care of himself, he's a big boy..." Irvine snapped at her.

"Whatever....Maybe you believe that....and maybe even he believes that. But he still might need us..." She said, looking over her shoulder before she ran off , "You can stay here if you want...but I'm going." 

"You're BOTH nuts!" Irvine called after her.

Squall soared through the air, dropping like a lead weight towards the ground that was rising to meet him. He landed on his feet with a thump. Looking up, Squall rushed forward through the palace gate, gunblade held outstretched behind him. Charging into the rioting crowd, shoving past frightened spectators. A few soldiers tried to stop him, he made short work of them, his blade twirling brilliantly in the garish night. Silver light trailing behind the gunblade's tip as it shredded flesh and shattered bone. He hijacked a police car, knocking out the officer and dumping him on the street.  

Squall tore through the street, wheels screeching as he avoided panicking crowd members. Pushing the accelerator as far as it would go, he rammed the heavy gate that had trapped the Sorceress's float. Whipping the door open, he scrambled through the bent gate and onto the float itself. Squall could see her, still standing with her hand held aloft, not knowing that death lurked so near. Climbing onto the platform, he burst through the crepe backboard of the throne. Lifting his gunblade to strike down the unsuspecting Sorceress. He swiped downward, the clank of metal on metal greeting him as his blow was blocked. _A black gunblade_... He looked up, Seifer, his face twisted with hate, leered at him. 

"What's the matter, Squall....see something green?"

Squall froze...._he was dead_..._they told us he was dead_... Seifer smirked, lunging forward, using his own momentum to unbalance Squall; spilling him to the floor. Seifer raised his gunblade, to strike Squall while he was down. Rolling quickly to his feet, Squall struck back at Seifer, twirling his gunblade upward defensively. Pushing himself off the floor, he swiped again. Seifer just barely had time to guard, the force of the blow driving him back. He recovered quickly, pointing his gunblade at the SeeD.  Squall stepped forward, holding his gunblade ready. 

".....Why are you here....they told us you were dead...." 

" 'They' talk too much....."  Seifer sneered, rushing forward, gunblade held high.

Squall easily blocked it, knocking the blow away from his body with the flick of his wrist. Seifer lunged again, his stance unbalanced and low, swiping sideways with his blade. Squall dodged, spinning around, gunblade whipping overhead. He brought it down gracefully, Seifer quickly countering with his own blow.  Metal grated on metal, sparks flying as the blades grinded against each other in a sick test of strength. Squall bared down, putting pressure on his blade, to weaken Seifer's hold on his own. 

"Answer me....Why are you here!?"

Seifer grunted, feeling his strength leave his arms. He sneered, jabbing a foot out and kicking Squall hard in the shin. His leg buckled, Seifer pushed him off, sending him stumbling backwards. Both young men faced each other, chests heaving. Seifer began to cackle, the sound was harsh and unpleasant. There was a change in him. Seifer had always been a jerk, but now there was malice. _Like that time at the comm  tower_...._he wants to kill me_....Squall thought, watching Seifer's face, distorted with anger. 

"The best the Garden has to offer....Pathetic......." Seifer spit, thrusting his blade forward again and again.

Squall blocked, with each blow he was being driven back. He knew sooner or later he'd reach the edge of the float. He fired off a round of ammo, showering hot shrapnel into Seifer's face. He winced, flailing and grabbing at his face. Rubbing his eyes, he looked at Squall in amazement. 

"I asked you question....WHY ARE YOU HERE!?"

Seifer laughed, "You haven't figured it out?! I'm here to protect the Sorceress from you.....I'm her knight." 

Squall stepped forward, his head shaking in contempt at what the man before him had become, "You're insane.....get out of my way." 

"Make me.....SeeD....." Seifer said with a derisive sneer. 

"Oh hell, I don't have time for this..." 

Squall lifted his hand up, sending out a spiraling gale of wind that knocked Seifer to the ground. He got up and smiled, rushing forward again, holding his gunblade sloppily in one hand. Thrusting quickly, he swung his blade at Squall, who calmly guarded each blow. Squall brought his weapon up, the blade twirling in his hand as he struck at Seifer. Hitting him with a barrage of blows that Seifer had trouble blocking. _When had he become so clumsy_....Squall thought, as he wailed on his opponent with quiet, but deadly precision. 

Any passion in the dance drained from him, becoming a wrote series of steps. Fighting Seifer had always been a challenge for him, a dance with death. In the years they'd practiced together, Squall had yet to best him. The slow realization that he had the upper hand in this fight, that he was going to win, startled Squall. He in all ways surpassed his sparring partner, his rival,  in skill and grace. Seifer noticed the difference, and wondered what had changed in Leonhart since they last fought. _When had he become so fucking good_? Anger bled into his soul. Why was he always better? _Bastard_.......The fight ranged back and forth across the float, the Sorceress watching with an amused but detached air. 

While Squall struggled with Seifer, Rinoa made her way, arduously, through the crowds of people. Pushing through pile ups of frightened spectators. The police and the National Guard had stepped in, trying to calm down the rioting crowd. Drifts of tear gas floated through the air, tearing up Rinoa's eyes. She covered her mouth with her hand, and kept moving towards the gateway. As she got closer, the strange tingling in her hands began again. _I don't need this now_...she thought, shaking them as she ran. Looking up, she was only a few feet away. She readied her blaster edge, clicking a pinwheel into place on the firing mechanism. There were guards everywhere, picking the least conspicuous place to enter, she slipped through the gate. Stopping a moment to look at a crashed car, its front end crumpled into the mangled gate. _Squall's handiwork_...

Once inside the gateway, she could hear a metal clanking, grunts....the sounds of a fight. Rinoa hurried, bending down and running down the length of the float, to avoid distracting Squall. Near the head of the float she climbed on, the pain in her hands throbbing once more. She looked up, Squall and Seifer were fighting...._Seifer_....Rinoa gasped...._I thought he was dead_.... 

The blonde man took note of his ex-girlfriend as she mounted the float. She paused for a moment, considering the two young men fighting. Her small hand groping her necklace as she whispered Squall's name with a look of concern. Seifer knew then. Sharp green eyes seeing exactly what had made Leonhart better. _She _had. His ex, she had a way about her, always bringing out the best in people. A light that inspired greatness and begged protection. Leonhart had taken his job, and Seifer felt a furious surge of jealousy well within him. The boy was trying to appropriate a dream that was by all rights his. _Always lauded, always the winner, the hero, the fucking good student, Garden's favorite little pretty boy_...._He has the world and now her_.... _He takes everything that's mine and makes it his_...._It's my fucking dream, she was mine first and now_...._Fucking bastard SeeD, I'll kill you_.....

Rinoa tried to work out how Seifer was alive and why he and Squall were fighting. She saw his eyes move to her, glancing her way with a look of rage. The fight looked serious, and she was afraid that they might hurt each other. Instinctively she grabbed her necklace for strength. Squall could take care of himself, she only hoped no one would get hurt. Seifer didn't matter now, the Sorceress hadn't noticed her yet. Squall was too busy to take her out, someone else would have to do it. _It's up to me_....

With determination, Rinoa started to raise her pinwheel, but stopped abruptly. The strange urge to hold out her hand engulfed her again. She blinked lazily, her body unwilling to fire her weapon, a force that was beyond her commanding her very soul. _Weapons will not save her_...._What_? Rinoa shook her head uncomprehendingly. There was no answer, only the silence of her own mind. Somehow, she knew what she had to do, though she had no idea why. Trusting her feelings, she let go and gave in to instinct. Her heart beat faster, a wash of dizziness overwhelmed her, blurring her vision temporarily. A long dormant power awakened, pulsing energy through her body causing the pain in her hands to grow, but strangely it didn't bother her that much now. She lowered her pinwheel, her right hand rising in its place. Hair fluttering in a nonexistent breeze. 

The tingling crawled up her arm, to her shoulder; it  felt so warm. No, it burned. Breathing in and out rapidly. She could feel the flow of energy coursing through her veins, its power was hers and she was its. Dark eyes glazing over as she gave more of herself over to the spell, it felt so natural. An orange light began to flicker from between her outstretched fingers....._just like when Squall used that fire spell_...she thought dreamily. Rinoa watched with fascination as a ball of fire slowly gathered in her palm. Her eyes went wide..._How am I?_  She watched as the flames flitted in the breeze. She'd made them, all by herself, with no Guardian Force junctioned. Her feelings mixed.... fear.... amazement..... giddiness.... Not thinking for a moment that the Sorceress would take notice of her as she stood there, staring at her own hand for an eternity. 

The fight had become hopelessly one sided, Squall had beaten Seifer down. It was barely worth his effort to continue to toy with him. It would've ended earlier but that he was so damn persistent. No matter how many times Squall thought he had him, Seifer'd get back up, spouting nonsense about being the Sorceress's knight. Squall didn't care what he called himself, he just wanted Seifer to pass out already so he could do his job. Seifer took another wide swing at him, Squall deftly spun around, dodging the blow. As he prepared to strike, he noticed a figure at the end of the float. Rinoa....why'd she follow him? 

As he fought, he glanced at her again...something wasn't right. She just stood there, her arm outstretched. He thought he could see..._flames_...._she didn't have magic, the hell_? Seifer started to scream at him to pay attention. Squall turned back to his opponent, a look of tired annoyance on his face. Seifer stumbled around, too messed up to fight anymore but still miraculously on his feet. He lurched over to Squall, barely able to hold up his blade. Seifer was obviously fatigued and little threat to anyone but himself. Bored with the fight, Squall sucker punched him and watched with disinterest as Seifer fought unconsciousness as it came slowly for him. While Seifer struggled, Squall took a moment and looked over at Rinoa, still standing there....quickly glancing behind him, following her gaze. 

The Sorceress had been quietly watching their fight, but now she too was standing. A strange electricity filled the air, crackling in anticipation. Edea had finally taken note of Rinoa and began to gather spheres of light in her hand. He looked back and forth, realizing what was going to happen. His opponenet still stood, wavering between passing out and wanting to continue the fight. Squall socked him as hard as he could, putting an end to Seifer's fruitless struggle to stay awake and fighting. Jumping over his opponent's prone body, Squall ran as fast as he could, hoping to get to Rinoa before it was too late. 

The Sorceress glared at the girl at the end of the float. The dragons hadn't killed her, she was resourceful, better than she gave her credit for. This time she wouldn't escape death so easily. The spheres of light slowly knit together, forming an enormous jagged icicle. The Sorceress cursed herself. It was taking too long, she'd used up too much energy forming the dragons. That boy might make it over before she'd be able to kill the girl. Not that she cared either way, death was her art and she took great joy in expressing her art form to as many as possible. The icicle formed, narrowing her eyes, the Sorceress sent it flying. 

Squall leapt forward, heart hammering in his chest as he  screamed at Rinoa to get out of the way, to move...but she didn't. She stood there like a zombie. A sound came from behind, whatever the Sorceress had planned to do, she'd set into motion. He had no time....closing in on Rinoa, he reached out, shoving her off the float. She tumbled to the ground, landing hard on her arm, the bone popping as she hit pavement.. Awakening from her dream world, she looked up at Squall, looking down at her. Time stopping as they gazed at each other. She remembered the dance, when she had to leave...he had the same look on his face now as he did then. No...she whispered.....A sudden flash of blue light, piercing his right shoulder....SQUALL!!!.....the icicle hitting its mark, sliding all the way through his shoulder and out his back...wincing in pain as it tore through his chest.....his gaze holding onto hers and just like in his dream, she was calling for him, her mouth moving soundlessly....I'm sorry.... his mouth open in a silent cry of pain....knees buckling....arcing backwards as he fell off the float........dawning realization as she watched him fall....so slow.....she screamed....he hit the ground with a horrible thud, the icicle shattering as he came to rest.  

She scrambled over to his side, touching his arm gently. He was still alive, just barely. His eyes fluttered, opening lazily to look up at her. He tried to speak, but she put a hand to his mouth and shook her head. Rinoa's lip trembled as she pushed back the tears, trying so hard to be strong.  She looked at his wound, a hole the size of her fist with jagged pieces of the icicle still imbedded in his shoulder. The cold slowed his bleeding, but it didn't stop it, nor did it stop the massive internal damage. Blood began to pool slowly behind him, taking his life with it. _I don't want to be alone_, was the one thought that entered his mind. 

Barely holding tears at bay, she tried to remember basic first aid. Hands trembling, she took off his glove and checked his pulse with her good hand. She desperately searched, her mind unable to remember exactly what steps she should take. Panic stalling her thought process. He looked up at her through lided eyes, fear shining in pale blue orbs. _What should I do_? Without thinking, she placed her hand over his. That simple human contact gave a kind of peace to his mind, enough to let him give into the pain and start to let go. _He's going to die_...Rinoa beat the thought back, hoping that maybe... Something deep inside told her the wounds were too severe, though her mind would not accept it. 

Suddenly, his breathing became more labored, as his bleeding lungs filled with fluid. His chest rattled, and the pause between breaths became longer. A trickle of blood fell from the corner of his mouth, signaling the end. Squall felt life leaving his body, escaping like the embers of a campfire.....spiraling upwards, into the star lit heavens. He breathed in deeply, his lungs burning like fire. Letting darkness overcome him, his last sight was Rinoa's pain stricken face. He shuddered with his last long breath, eyes half closed and staring vacantly at the sky. 

"Squall, .....please don't...." Rinoa breathed, shaking her head, rejecting his death.

The tears came, flowing down her face like a vast river, flooding as the snow melts in spring. Rinoa let out a choked gasp, she didn't know what to do... feeling so damn useless. Her mind wandering back to her mother's death. Sitting in the waiting room at the hospital with relatives she barely knew. All of them trying to keep her from the pain; not knowing that it just made it worse. Would this moment have been easier if she'd been able to see her mother? _Why? Stupid ass, WHY? We weren't even friends_....._I barely knew you! WHY!! No job is worth your life_...._so why? why? why?why? It should have been me, you fucking idiot, it should have been me!!!_....._Why didn't you just let it hit me? God, please help_...._Why_? Still holding his hand, she helplessly stared down at his lifeless body, sobbing softly. Rinoa closed her eyes, praying silently through her tears.

 Her right hand was still prickling, a constant hum of painful energy, though she didn't notice it through her grief. The power she had built up hadn't been dispersed, and her hand was illuminated with warmth, the breath of life itself gathering in her palm. The light pulsed, beating in time to Rinoa's own heart beat, and with a sudden push it glowed more softly as it transferred from her hand to his. The powers that be answering their daughter's prayer. 

Nothing in the world mattered anymore, shutting out all exterior noises to her internal sorrow. Fate had its way with her again, her life running in a vast never-ending cycle of pain and regret. Rinoa cried, until she was too physically tired to continue and opted to keep silent vigil over Squall's body. The world slowly came back to her and she looked up, wondering when she'd be dragged away.  Looking down, contemplating the blood that now stained her clothes and hands...like small red storm clouds, spreading their stain over a pristine sky......._blood over perfect blue_.....she waited.

Moments later, the sounds of a scuffle broke out, a cry of surprise and suddenly Quistis came stumbling around the float, Galbadian soldiers in pursuit. She skidded to a stop as she came to the scene, her eyes darting from Rinoa to Squall's corpse, a small pool of blood around his back. There was no time for her to really comprehend the scene, the guards took their opening and grabbed Quistis. They pinned her to the ground and cuffed her, bringing her up and pushing her out toward the street. More came from the other side and roughly brought Rinoa to her feet, wrenching her arm up and back as they cuffed her as well. She cried out in anger, as they trampled over Squall's body, tearing her from her vigil. 

Both women gave in and as the guards lead them away, and once they were pushed into the street, their eyes met and it seemed time slowed again. The guards lead them to separate vehicles, Rinoa strained to keep contact, she need to make sure everything was alright. That Quistis didn't hate her, didn't blame her, didn't think that.....Rinoa struggled, breaking away long enough to catch Quistis' attention once more. Quistis turned, her face beautifully regal despite the situation, tears staining her alabaster cheeks. She glared at Rinoa in accusation, her eyes cold, full of regret that she'd allowed this girl to come with them. The look was a sharp slap in the face for Rinoa, leaving her short of breath and light headed. Those eyes told Rinoa what she knew already, this was all her fault. She was a freak, a monster like Edea and she'd cost her friend his life. _Should have been me_.....

They were dragged out into the street, flood lights blazing to light the scene, police barricades holding the roaring crowd back. The sound became muffled, as if Rinoa was in and out of the world at the same time, black dots rolling across her vision. It occurred to her that she might just faint again, a feat which baffled her. She'd always prided herself on being strong, and this weakness just confirmed that something was dreadfully wrong with her. This was the second time in her life that she'd fainted.... funny. The world went black and all she could hear were the warm voices from beyond. 


	17. Gimme Shelter

He knew there'd be trouble from the moment his shot had stopped short, spinning uselessly in the air in front of the Sorceress, he knew. Squall's suicidal leap off the balcony was just icing on the cake. Now Rinoa had left on a fool's errand and Irvine was left to pick up the pieces. 

_Story of my life, man_....he sighed, looking out over the crowd. 

Soldiers were pushing their way through the riot, and towards the palace. It'd be awhile before they got there, but he knew they'd be here soon enough. Too soon, and he'd be caught if he didn't stop daydreaming. Irvine fingered his gun, it was a liability, he knew this but it was hard for him to accept the fact that he had to destroy it. _It's evidence, and if you're caught with it they'll hang you_....Still, it was hard to get rid of an old friend, one that had been by his side for seven long years. 

Irvine had been one of the few exceptionally bright children handpicked by Garden and immediately enrolled in their SeeD program. Recruiters came just as the orphanage he'd lived in closed, and had selected him to move into the recently opened Garden in Galbadia. They'd seen him shooting cans off an old fence with a BB-gun that he'd found in the basement. It was an activity he knew that Matron had frowned upon, so he'd hidden it from her. He thought that no one but him knew where this little fence was, it was his own private place. A smile spread across his young face as he aimed at a large green glass bottle. Just as he was about to fire, he felt the firm grip of a hand on his shoulder. _Nuts_...._I'm caught_. 

He turned slowly to take his punishment, shoulders slack. His eyes turned upward, expecting the see the Matron, instead he saw a young man he didn't recognize, dressed in an odd military uniform. That moment had changed his life forever, they packed his belongings and Irvine had never looked back. Garden became his home, and the only life he ever knew. He never knew the pain and suffering that someone like Squall had endured, nor did he ever experience the warmth of family, like Selphie had. His life was somewhere in between, a large family of peers but little attention given just to him. Don't get the wrong idea, he was grateful to the Garden for what they'd done for him....But, he'd always wished for a more normal life, with a real family, a real home. 

Perhaps that was why he was so drawn to Selphie, because she had a real family. Playing the field had always been his thing, and all the ladies he was traveling with were beautiful....but right from the start, Selphie had stood out to him. Cheerful, always quick to laugh and easy to tease. She was a ray of sunshine, a little island of contentment, filled with so much joy and laughter that could not be contained in her small frame. His first crush and the only girl he'd ever really cared for. _If only she'd remember_.

On the road, they had talked a lot, she had told him about her family back in Trabia. It was strange, as she told those family stories, he relived them with her...though he didn't really know the people that were in them, somehow, she made it real. Made them vivid enough to touch, and for once in his life, he felt something that was real. Real love, a thing he'd been starving for his whole life. A strange feeling had come over him at that moment, as he melted the gun he'd carried since he was ten with the heat from a single flare spell. Selphie Timlett was the girl who'd settle him down. Teach him what having a family was all about, teach him how to really love someone. 

Irvine smiled softly, "Boy, you've gone soft...."

His gun destroyed, Irvine soundlessly stepped out of the clock tower. He made his way quickly out of the palace, slipping through the darkened halls and exiting the grounds before the first guard even entered. The crowd had finally calmed down, ushered behind large riot gates by the police. Irvine mixed in with them, blending in slowly with the large crowd surrounding the gateway. 

As he went, a feeling well up inside him that he had to move faster. That he had to get there in time to stop Rinoa and Squall....it chided that he should have tried harder to stop them before, that it may already be too late. Whatever evil was to be, was already in motion, and he only had this last chance to redeem himself. He'd already screwed up....he couldn't do it again. That warning in his heart propelled him, as he was never the intuitive type.

As a sharpshooter, he like things simple and easily explained. Intuition was something you used when everything else failed you. The same could be said for magic.... He distrusted it and everything that went along with it. In fact, he'd only just recently junctioned with a GF, he had to have one for at least a year to graduate. If they hadn't made it a requirement, he wouldn't have done it at all. This was why he was so worried, because his heart told him so clearly that there was something wrong. Perhaps, it was the work of the Guardian Force, and not him......he wasn't really sure......Irvine pushed those thoughts aside and moved faster. 

Between dodging the police and pushing his way through the crowd, it took him a full twenty minutes to reach the gateway. It was a busy scene, police and soldiers coming and going. Large arc lights were erected, and the crowd gathered to them like moths. Police near the riot barriers were futilely pleading with the crowd that there was nothing to see.  Irvine had snuck in close and managed to press his fellow crowd members for an update of events. A smashed car had been dragged away from the gates, and set to the side. The gates themselves had been pried open, and the police were at a distance, trying to figure out how to proceed. They debated this for quite sometime, and after awhile, Irvine stopped checking his watch and just waited in nervous anticipation. More than anything, he just wanted to charge in and help his friends, but even he knew better. An unarmed man, against heavily armed soldiers and police...no thanks. 

Activity began to steadily increase, and though it had seemed an eternity to Irvine, it was in fact, no more than forty five minutes from when he arrived. The police mobilized, swarming into the gateway like a hive full of angry bees. The scuffle could be heard, shouts and then the first group of police came out with Zell in tow. He looked worse for wear, but then again, so did the police. All were nursing some bad bruises and two of them, nasty bloody noses. They jammed him roughly into a waiting police van. A few moments later came Selphie, looking as if she was about to cry. It tugged at his heart, she was dirty and quite scared, little nicks and scratches on her hands, knees and face.

Hope faded further, as a young blonde man came out of the gateway, Sorceress in his arms. Irvine felt an odd moment of recognition, the young blonde's face seemed so familiar, but it quickly passed. He was accompanied by a dozen soldiers to a separate police car, which took off as soon as they entered it. The full motorcade buzzing through the crowded scene as fast as they could. Irvine's heart sank while the gathered crowd cheered,  he closed his eyes to bar his anger......Squall had failed....they'd all failed.....he'd failed. _If only I'd shot sooner_.....a thought which would come to haunt him. Rubbing his eyes, he watched the gateway, he still had friends in there. Quistis was pulled out, and she was quiet....too quiet.....he could see the delicate trails of tears on her face. She looked back, Rinoa was right behind her, the same look of shell shocked sadness. At that moment the two young women shared a look, and suddenly Rinoa dropped to the ground in a dead faint. _Oh_...._god_.....Irvine's heart beat faster, _Where is Squall_? He didn't want to register the thought that followed, because if he thought it, it'd be true. And it couldn't be true...it just couldn't be. 

The entourage stopped suddenly, and the orderly scene became only slightly less so. The soldiers let Rinoa fall to the ground, leaving her unguarded as they looked for help. Quistis' escort stopped to keep an eye on Rinoa, holding Quistis firmly while they watched. Irvine sensed a chance, and somehow he caught Quistis's eye.  Without so much as a word, she knew what he was asking her. They'd discussed it with Caraway before they'd left, just the three of them. Her father had asked them both to look after Rinoa, that if the plan went wrong.....Quistis nodded, closing her eyes, she called forth her Guardian Force, Odin. 

He granted her wish, as was his will. Appearing before a baffled crowd, Odin surveyed the scene with a distant eye, his tattered cape fluttering behind him and with a lunge of his lance, he reared his horse up, swinging it downward onto the concrete. The sky darkened, and a single bolt of lightning hit his lance....all the lights in the city instantly winked out and it began to rain heavily. Odin's last gift was a sudden gust of black mist that obfuscated everything around the area he'd appeared in. The effect of the crowd and the police was instant and total anarchy. Irvine rushed forward, knocking out Rinoa's guards with a few well placed kicks and jabs. She was just waking up and Irvine had no time, freezing her bonds to break them, he scooped her up into his arms and fled. 

The rain was cold and bitter, and it stung with every drop. Wet, tired, and chilled to the bone, Irvine knew he had to stop soon. He'd carried Rinoa well over four city blocks from the gateway, and his arms had grown weary. Whatever had happened to her left her completely exhausted, and though she was awake, she was unable to run fast enough. He was pretty sure that no one had seen them escape, and even more sure that no one had followed them. But it always pays to be cautious, and he'd driven himself as far as he could to make sure. 

Unable to run any further, he stopped at a small bus stop to rest and get out of the rain. The city's lights were still out, the only illumination came from  the emergency vehicles rushing through the streets. Tiny neon dots, flying through the gray city towards the Gateway they'd just left, to quell the second riot of the night. Rinoa shivered, teeth chattering as she sat next to him on the gnarled old bench inside the stop. Irvine felt another surge of useless anger, as he had nothing to offer her to keep her warmer, being just as wet as she. He went to put an arm around her, but she shied away, preferring the bleak numbness of the cold to being warm. Shrugging, he turned his face to look at the plastic bubble ceiling of the bus stop. Droplets of rain hitting the clear roof and running down its smooth sides.  A car passed by, its lights briefly passing over them. Irvine looked at Rinoa again, in the flickering brilliance of the headlights, the trails of rain on the stop's clear walls casting drizzling shadows on her face like tears. After a moment, he realized that she was really crying, and it wasn't just the trick of the light. 

"Rinoa....." He began carefully, pausing briefly to chew on his lip nervously, "Wha...What happened out there?"

She looked up at him wearily, tears running down trails already traveled, "Squall....Squall's dead.... it's all my fault.....The Sorceress.....she....and he saved me. It should have been me.....She was aiming at me....It's all my fault....Oh god....."

He put his hand on her shoulder, a gentle gesture that she finally accepted; allowing him to hold her as she cried. In-between sobs she told him everything that had happened, as well as she could. He could tell she was glazing over some parts of the story, but he left it alone. A thousand thoughts spun through his mind, and it was an effort to focus on any one. But it all finally boiled down to his own failure. Looking down at the lost little girl in his arms, it crushed him. How could she blame herself? 

"No....No it's not your fault...." he stopped..._it's mine_...a thought which did not help the crisis at hand, "Squall....He was prepared for something like this......We all are. It's a risk we take as members of SeeD."

She shook her head, "It shouldn't be..... No...no one should.....Damn it, we're just kids...Irvine"

"Rinoa, you've been doing real fighting longer than any of us....least, that's what Seffie told me....and as a resistance member, you should be more prepared than any of us for..."

"WHAT?!" she snapped, red hot rage reflecting in her deep eyes, "The death of my friends? Yes, I've seen a lot of it, and frankly I'm tired. I'm seventeen, I should be worrying about prom, or pimples or...GOD! Anything but this. I'm tired of all the pain....I'm tired of people getting hurt for no reason......death follows wherever I go, and I'm so tired....."

Irvine was silent for a moment, letting the truth of her statement sink in, "Rinoa, death doesn't follow you. It just happens......Listen, we both can beat ourselves up over this all we want....but it changes nothing. If life hands you a bag of shit,  use it as mulch for a flower bed......you don't just hang onto it and bitch about the stink.....Don't worry, okay....No one blames you.... Now, come on....We have to go....."

She sniggered at his comment, more out of relief than anything else,  "That was the weirdest bit of advice I've ever been given....weird, but strangely compelling .....Thanks, Irvine."

He smiled, and tipped his hat to her, "You're welcome....." 

She smiled back weakly, wiping her eyes, "......you know, it's not your fault either....."

Irvine didn't answer her, he nodded, letting an absent tear slide from the corner of his eye. Looking out of the stop, watching the rain, two people, different as day and night, made a silent bond to each other. An unspoken oath to help the friends they had remaining, no matter what. Both of them prepared to leave the relative comfort of the bus stop, wrapping already wet jackets around their wet bodies. They walked out into the rain together, little gray forms moving slowly into the misty darkness. 

It was a gamble, summoning Odin, hell it always had been.  He was a notoriously temperamental Guardian Force, never showing up when she actually needed him, but if she didn't need him, boy howdy, he'd come rushing in. It had been such a struggle, that she'd given up summoning him at all. He'd come if he felt like it, who was she to try and force him to obey. This was the one time having him trained to summon on command would have come in handy. There were several other things she could have done, but this was the best...the easiest. She needed total chaos, and a simple spell just wouldn't cut it.

So she just prayed, prayed that he'd for once just come when she called, that it wasn't for her own gain that he come, but for another. This had pleased the warrior god quite a bit, he was rarely called for such an honorable reason....and so he came. Quistis had been surprised when it had actually worked, so surprised that she stood there stunned for a moment as if she'd never even seen her own G.F. in action.  

In the shrouded mist, she stood, listening to the riot she'd caused. Firm hands still holding her upper arms, she didn't even try to struggle. The fog quickly cleared and to Quistis' relief, Rinoa and Irvine were gone. At last, something in her life went right, though she knew it was fleeting. Shouts of alarm went up, calling for a search of the area for the escaped prisoner and her accomplice. Quistis couldn't help but smile at the handiwork she'd taken part in as she looked down at the guards that Irvine had knocked out. She barely even felt the blow to her head from the baton of an angry soldier. 

The world was blurry, the sound muffled, and her head hurt, those were her first thoughts as she came to. The world came into focus slowly, though her pain did not subside. Quistis looked around slowly, trying to avoid turning her head too much. It didn't work too well, as the throbbing from the back of her neck and temples increased. It was dark, wherever she was and she was moving. Her eyes adjusting to the darkness while lights from the traffic outside flickered through the barred windows. The cold metal on her wrists was confirmation enough that she was in a police van, arrested and most likely heading for a prison of some sort. _Doubt there'll even be a trial, with a new dictator in town, I'm sure we're off for a fun filled holiday execution_.....she thought sullenly.  Hushed whispering coming just in front of her let her know she wasn't alone. The fleeting lights illuminated the faces of her friends, trying desperately to free themselves. 

"Ow....shit....be careful jackass!"

"Shut up! It'd go easier if you'd hold still....."

"Do you even know what you're doing?"

"No...no I don't....I've never had the opportunity to pick the locks on hand-cuffs, while riding in a police van.....backwards......"

"What....Irvy boy hasn't had the chance to teach you yet?"

"You are soooooo dead Dincht......"

"OW!.....OOOW OW OW!OW!OW! YOU BI..."

"Do you really wanna finish that sentence....I still have this pokey thingie....and I'm not afraid to use it...."

"......pppffffffftttt.....fine......Stab my poor defenseless arm,  see if I care.....You know, you really hurt me that last time...."

"Sorry.....but it serves you right....."

"Does not.....and it's not a pokey thingie....it's a "

"Does so.....and I don't care what you call it"

"Does not... and why won't you let me finish my sentenc..."

"Because you have...stupid hair....SHUT UP!! ...and it DOES SO...."

"DOES NOT"

"DOES SO"

"NOT"

"SO!"

"NOT!"

"DOES SO DOES SO DOES SO DOES SO DOES SO...."

And it would have continued like that, ad infinitum, but Quistis couldn't stand it any longer. Her head hurt, her heart hurt and all the childish prattling wasn't making anything any better. 

"SHUT UP THE BOTH OF YOU!"

The pair promptly did as they were told and a small moment of blessed silence ensued. It didn't last nearly as long as Quistis had wished. Both began to talk at once, asking frothy question after question, a rapid fire litany of how glad they were she was okay, and wondering what went wrong, and so forth. Quiet, that was all she wanted, quiet, because there was too damn much for her to think about. If she had a hand to hold up to quiet them, she would have. Instead she just sighed, letting her face do the work for her.  No words were needed, the pained expression said enough. Bad news was coming, news that was worse than just them in a police van on their way to unhappy prison death. Real quiet fell over the tiny interior of the van, and Quistis told them what she knew, the good and the extremely bad. Zell for the first time in his entire life had nothing to say, only silent tears. Selphie, however, had lots of things to say. She shook her head, green eyes flashing like gems. 

"No......I don't believe you....." she whispered, her voice tremulously angry.

A forty minute argument took place between Quistis and Selphie. The young SeeD refused to believe that her leader was dead and that Quistis was telling the truth. Selphie felt it was a terribly cruel joke and wished that Quistis would stop because it was just mean. As it went on, it got quite heated as Quistis lost her temper, she'd tired of being gentle and told her what she'd seen in all its macabre glory. The body, the blood, the whole gory picture. Selphie began to weep, finally accepting the awful truth for what it was. 

Dead silence overwhelmed the three SeeDs, and it left Quistis wondering if quiet was really what she wanted after all. The rest of the trip was spent in this way, not one of them speaking a word to the others. They were lost in their own private thoughts. Happy that at least Irvine and Rinoa had gotten away and were presumably free, maybe making plans for a rescue. Sad at their terrible loss, and whatever fate had in the cards for them at the end of their ride. 

Minutes turned into hours, a simple ride to prison became a trek that was nearly endless in its scope. It could have been an entire day, or even a week as far as the three SeeDs were concerned. The pattern that had evolved over the last few hours were a number of stops, involving lots of loading and unloading, and the occasional meal. It was exhausting, and it kept them disoriented and wondering when it was all going to end. A tactic the guards were acutely aware of. The SeeDs were dangerous and resourceful, they couldn't give them the opportunity to gauge their surroundings or have a moments breath to think. The incident at the gateway was enough to show them that, they only needed to learn their lesson once. Another precautionary measure had been to give them injections to suppress their Guardian Forces. There was no way they could forcibly remove them, but keeping them from summoning them again was a priority. 

The SeeDs didn't even see the exterior of prison that was to be their temporary home, the vehicle carrying them went through to the basement garage. It was more usual for them to stop the vehicle and register with the gate attendant, but this protocol was dismissed. With these prisoners, the sooner they were inside the better. They were pulled out of the van for the last time, herded into the processing area by gunpoint. 

Once inside, the guards separated them, Quistis and Selphie went one way, Zell the other. As usual, their captors took care to be extra rough, grabbing on to them and manhandling them like they were children's rag dolls. Quistis realized it was because the guards were afraid. Some of them were the same officers she'd seen at the parade. They knew what a SeeD could do if left to their own devices. But she tired of the constant pushing and pulling, they couldn't do anything anyway. The injections they were given rendered them powerless, at least for a time. Quistis also guessed that the prison was equipped with an anti-magic field, and as she entered the processing area she could feel her guess was right. The drugs they were given had a numbing effect on their senses, a light headed sensation that was vaguely unpleasant. This same feeling was multiplied by ten,  it was a dizziness that was so complete that they could barely stand. Dizziness was followed by nausea, and though Quistis and Zell had the strength of mind and body to hold it back, Selphie did not. She puked all over the floor, nearly passing out. This was evidence enough to their guards that the three SeeDs were no longer a viable threat. The prodding and pushing subsided, and gave way to merely being guided. 

The female guards were rather sympathetic towards Selphie, and wiped her face with a wet wash cloth. The effect of the field was temporary and as they got used to it, they would barely notice it at all. Though this did little to comfort Selphie and her bruised ego. Once order was regained, the girls were taken into separate exam rooms. They were given a full body cavity search and then a medical exam. Their clothes were taken from them, and once the medical portion was done, they were escorted to the showers. 

They were instructed to wash with the soaps and shampoos that were given to them. It was explained that they contained agents that would kill any parasites they might have brought in with them. Both women were insulted at the very idea, but they did as they were told anyway. Still wet and shivering from the cold, they were given their prison clothes. The guards watched as they dressed. Undergarments weren't allowed, so they had to slip into their simple and very unflattering stretch pants and t-shirts, going commando. Quistis in particular found this uncomfortable. She had a rather large bosom, and the idea of not wearing a bra was just down right wrong in her eyes. Getting felt up by mannish female guards was bad enough, but this final indignity was all she could bear. _I shall have to complain to their management_....she thought dryly, as she was walked to their next destination.

Trotting down the brilliantly lit concrete hallways of the prison, Quistis had time to listen to her body again. She'd ignored its needs for the last few hours, blocking out her tiredness for the sake of her companions. They needed her to be strong, and so she was. Her whole body ached, and she realized that it had been almost 72 hours since she last slept. 

The next stop was the prison photo studio for her compulsory line up photo. Before that the pleasant and cheerful guards asked her a series of annoying personal questions. Ten minutes alone were spent on the spelling of her name.  Next came finger printing, she'd gone through this before but the guards were far rougher than the administrators at Garden. The admitting officer was finally sated and they pushed her over to the blue screen to take her photo. Shoving a card with her name, her prison number and the date on it, into her hand, the flash bulb went off. They turned her to the side and took the second photo.  

While Quistis blinked away the corona from the flash bulb, the guards waited for her picture and vital statistics to process through the prison computer.  The pictures came up on the screen, along with all her information,  the admitting officer was pleased. Quistis wasn't sure why, but they showed her how the pictures had turned out. As expected, she looked tired, dirty and possibly on drugs. In other words, the typical I.D./line-up photo. _Wow, if only I could show the whole world my brand new look, Prison Haute Couture _...it was funny, but Quistis chided herself for being so cynical, though it was all she had to keep her going. A little paper card was printed out with the picture, her last name and her prisoner number on it. This was given to her guard and filed in a little notebook where she kept a list of all the prisoners she was responsible for. 

Quistis was cuffed again and the guard read off the prison rules, stuffing a large bundle of toiletries, extra clothes, and sheets into her bound hands. As it turned out, Selphie was done at the same time. They shared a look as they were lead into the prison proper. The guard slipped a keycard into a nearly new looking reader, the door to a large elevator opened and they were lead inside it. Going up several floors, the ride was smooth with only the occasional worrisome bump. The doors opened and soon they were being lead and then locked into their cell. The room was almost indescribably dull, cold light gray walls with no windows. Concrete bunks lay in one corner of the simple cell, ratty looking mattresses thrown hastily on the solid bed-frames. The flat glow from the fluorescent lights didn't help, giving the whole room an utterly bleak, hopeless feel. 

The girls settle into their room, putting away toiletries and making beds. Quistis felt completely empty, as if every emotion she had was spent. She sighed heavily, sitting on the edge of her bed. Selphie as usual had claimed the top bunk, crawling into her bed almost immediately after she made it. She'd tried, as hard as she could, but Selphie had never been a very strong person when it came to these situations. Unable to hold it back anymore, she let herself cry for the umpteenth time that day. Her eyes were red and irritated because it seemed that crying was all she was capable of. Quistis crawled up into Selphie's bunk, cradling the younger SeeD in her arms. Patting her hair gently, she rocked Selphie back and forth while lost in her own thoughts. 

"Quistis, what are we gonna do?" 

".....I....I don't know....." Quistis answered her honestly, her voice trailing off.

"I wanna go home....." Selphie whispered, her voice plaintive, desperate, ".....I want my Mom....." , she closed her eyes, choking back another wave of tears. 

Quistis smiled gently,  "I know......I want to go home too......" rubbing her forehead, she could feel the beginnings of a headache coming on, "Don't worry.....It'll be alright....." she lied, it wasn't going to be right at all. 

What the young girl needed was comfort, not the truth. The truth would come later, once she was ready for it. A small wave of pain in her temples caught Quistis off guard. She steadied herself with one hand as another rush of pain assaulted her. She rubbed her temples, trying to alleviate the hurt as much as she could. It was unlikely that she'd get any headache meds from the guards, keeping prisoners pain free was hardly their first concern. 

Selphie looked up at her, eyes still puffy from crying, "You okay??"

Quistis nodded, "Yeah, just a heada....." 

She was cut off as the headache arced into another unbearable surge of pain. It was followed by a high pitched whine, it pierced all thought and only made the pain in her head worse. It was like her mind was being warped from within, some force tearing at its walls....splitting her consciousness from her body. A gauzy film of gray blurred her vision, Quistis could feel darkness slipping in. 

"Quistis.....are you alright?? What's wrong?? Quistis??...."

The voice seemed to be coming from so far away and Quistis fought to keep herself in her body. Something was tearing her from it. She felt so tired, was she really this tired? _Unsure, nothing was what it seemed_......Her eyes fluttered as she tried in vain to ward off sleep, but the urge became too strong. Quistis let the creeping darkness take her, slipping into unconsciousness. 


	18. Shades of Visions Past

Kiros Seagill strode into the small town of Winhill, wondering what in the hell he was doing here. He'd been looking for Laguna for months now, this was the last lead he'd gotten. Frankly, he was tired of looking. If he didn't find the idiot here, he was officially giving up. 

It'd been so long since he saw Laguna last, not since their escape from the laboratory in Esthar. Laguna had gotten lost on patrol, again. Leading them into some kind of secret experimental facility in the deepest part of Esthar, far away from where they were supposed to have been stationed and away from their unit. Laguna, in his short sightedness, didn't turn around or check his bearings like any sane person would. Instead, he decided to charge into the building, to check it out. Esthar soldiers had eventually chased them out and the whole debacle had almost cost them their lives. They escaped by leaping off a cliff to the ocean below, another of Laguna's brilliant ideas. He should have been angry, but really, it was his own fault. Who's the bigger idiot...Laguna or him for going along with Laguna's crazy ideas? They managed to find a small boat that served them for most of their journey, until a freak storm had destroyed it. They had been separated in the melee. Laguna and Ward had drifted off in different directions than Kiros had. 

He ended up being found by some fishermen, who helped him get back to Galbadia. Once he was home and well enough, Government representatives came and asked him what he knew about that lab. He told them what little he could remember. 

Despite Laguna's habit of getting lost, he had an excellent memory when it came to technical readouts and machinery. _Strange that Directions were an entirely different matter_. When they were in that lab it was amazing what he knew. Pointing out the use of various pieces of equipment, sounding like some damn tech manual. Kiros remembered Laguna had swiped some piece of machinery, as a memento. He told the agents this, and they responded favorably. That's when they asked him to help find Laguna, as well as Ward. He agreed, hell, he was planning to do it once he was well anyway. Galbadia had become desperate for any advantage. Esthar and the Sorceress were gathering power, storing up for something big. The Galbadian Government had already made allies with Balamb, in an effort to combine forces. They'd also secured help from a new military academy in Balamb, called The Garden,  who trained elite combat teams that everyone hoped would make a difference.

 Kiros wasn't what you'd call gung-ho for fighting for any government.....but what they'd told him about what Esthar had done since they'd been taken out changed his mind. His home continent had been destroyed by Esthar, while he recovered. Millions of innocent people, his family, his friends...died as a result of Esthar and the Sorceress. He couldn't afford to be cynical any longer. If what Laguna could tell them would help, he'd find him no matter what.

He'd found Ward just a few weeks ago. Living the high life in the south west as a janitor for a minimum security prison. Ward has lost his voice as a direct result of their adventure. A wound to the neck from an Esthar cyborg had severed his vocal cords. It was lucky that Ward was such a strong fellow, built like an ox. Anyone else would've died with a wound like that. He told Kiros that he'd been picked up by a Balamb Marine patrol. Spent his months on the sunny little island recuperating. Talked about the nice room, and the pretty nurse, Anna,  who had helped him get well. 

"Any chance for a love connection?" Kiros teased.

Ward shook his head, writing furiously on his pad and handing it to Kiros. "No....she just got married to a local fisherman.....Dincht, nice guy, he's good for her....be there more than I would....besides, she's not my type."

Kiros nodded, telling Ward why he'd really come. The Galbadian government needed them. They were very interested in any information on the laboratory they'd been to. They called it the Lunatic Pandora, said that it was more than just a lab....it was some kind of weapon that could unleash incredible destructive power. Though they didn't tell him what it would do. Ward, Laguna, and himself were the only ones that could help. If they could find any weakness in Esthar's defense and exploit it, they were willing. They also needed a hand liberating Deling City. _If we can escape a top secret military lab with our lives, why not free a city?_  Ward had agreed to go, leaving with Kiros for Timber, the temporary capital while Deling was occupied. 

The only hitch was finding Laguna. After the incident in Esthar, almost a year ago, very little had been heard about Laguna. Kiros tracked down a lead in Trabia around six months ago. The Shumi tribe had contacted Galbadia about a soldier that had washed up on their shores. He was wounded badly, and they'd nursed him back to heath. Once he was well enough to talk, they'd asked him where he'd come from, so they could return him to his people. Laguna being a naturally gregarious fellow had made instant friends with the Tribe. He ended up staying for quite some time before they called the Galbadian Government. By the time Kiros arrived, Laguna had already split. He'd questioned the village elders where they thought he might go. They told him he'd gone off to  Fishermen's Horizon. Once he made it there, he learned from locals that Laguna had been there but left a few days ago. It had been like that for the last few months, always arriving in a town a few days or hours too late. His only clues to Laguna's whereabouts the occasional article in Timber Maniacs magazine, and the offhand witness to Laguna's unique brand of genius. 

After all this time, he'd finally tracked Loire down to this tiny hamlet. Kiros walked through the unpaved streets of Winhill, getting the occasional look from a passing villager. He wasn't offended, not often you saw a six foot tall Centra warrior, dressed in traditional garb. Kiros asked the old woman at the flower shop if she'd seen Laguna. She had, pointing to a pub near the center of the village. He thanked her, bowing and then taking his leave. 

Kiros stepped into the only restaurant in Winhill, Blue Heaven, where he hoped to find his friend. The bar keep looked up as he entered, regarding him with a warm smile. The first thing Kiros noticed about her, were her eyes, gray blue orbs sparkling like pale diamonds. Tucking a strand of light brown hair behind her ear she greeted him. 

"What can I get you?"

"Nothing actually.....I'm looking for someone that I've been told is here. Might I inquire if you've seen him?" Kiros said, holding out Laguna's photo. 

A look of shock passed over her face, "Yes...... Is he in trouble?"

"No, not at all, love. I'm an old friend of his from the army. I'd like to see him if he's here. You see, I've got some urgent news that greatly concerns him. Is he about?"

"Yes...I'll go get him." She said, running upstairs. 

Shortly she returned, Laguna appeared moments later, a little girl riding on his broad shoulders.  He stopped dead when he saw Kiros standing at the counter, breaking into that silly smile of his. 

"KIROS!" Laguna shouted, flipping the little girl over his shoulder and setting her on her feet, giggling. He strode over to his friend, giving him a big bear hug, "How are you, buddy?" 

"Quite well.....be much better if I could breathe......and you?"

"Sorry....Fine, fine.....Oh!....probably should introduce everybody....Kiros, this is Raine.....Raine, Kiros....and this little bundle of trouble is Ellie. So, what brings you here?"

"Well, I'm sure you don't want to hear this....but I'm here on official business. You've been called back into service."

Laguna sat down hard on one of the bar stools, a look so sad and forlorn on his face. They ended up talking the entire night. Kiros telling him all that had happened, suspecting he knew more about it than he acted like he knew. It became clear to Laguna that he'd have to go back into service, leaving his tiny piece of heaven. Raine had gone silent as they talked on and on. Laguna was sure there'd be some kind of fight with her on the horizon. He asked Kiros if he might put his affairs into order before he had to leave.  Kiros gave him three days. Three days to say all the things he'd left unsaid to Raine....In his whole life, Laguna had never met anyone like her...She was funny and always spoke her mind without reservation....She was a single mother, not born of privilege....working her entire life, buying that bar.....independent....so different from Julia....he loved her more than anything in the world and he didn't want to leave her or her sweet little daughter....she called him Uncle Laguna....After Kiros had left to get a hotel room....he and Raine had fought...just a little. He'd lead her out into their favorite spot since he'd come to Winhill.  It was a tiny little overlook, with a stunning view of the nighttime sky. Laguna looked up at the stars, noticing a tiny meteorite burning in the atmosphere......

 "Raine......" he said, pointing upward at the shooting star, "Make a wish....."

She looked up, her gray blue eyes regarding the sky, "I wish you didn't have to leave....but since I've said it, I guess it won't come true, will it?" 

Laguna was silent for a moment, "No, I'm sorry......."

Raine nodded soberly, looking up at him with those storm clouded eyes. They were full of tears, tears that he caused. Laguna's face struggled with emotion, why did this have to happen now? 

"So.....Will you come back?" Raine asked, her voice bitterly hopeless, as if she already knew the answer was no, "Don't bullshit me Loire......I want to know, because if this is just some stupid excuse to let me down easy.....I'll kick your ass. Elle deserves a real father....She already looks up to you, Laguna.....you owe it to her, if not to me, to give a strait answer...."

Laguna almost laughed, almost, Raine wouldn't take it well if he did. She was in one of her moods, and when Raine was in a mood, you didn't mess with her.

He looked at her, eyes as dark blue as the bottom of the ocean, "I love you Raine.....I love Ellie. I know that you've been hurt in the past.....I know that anything I could say will sound like more hollow, empty promises. But, I want you to know.....No matter what, I will come back for you _and_ Elle. Even if I have to drag myself here, I will come........"

He pulled out a small, velvet box and gave it to her. Raine took the box, examining it for a moment before she looked up at Laguna uncertainly. Slowly, she opened it, inside was a tiny gold ring, with a single diamond in the center. 

Her mouth opened in surprise, "......Laguna.....What is this?"

"It's an engagement ring....they do have those here, right?", a sly grin spreading across his face.

She smiled back at him, swatting at his arm as punishment for being so glib, "Yes, they do......and I accept."

"HEY! I haven't even asked yet....."

"_So_, You don't need to......you'd probably just get tongue tied and screw it up anyway...." Raine laughed, her smile lighting her face like the most brilliant of stars. 

Laguna chuckled, how couldn't he? It was true. A noise from behind them startled the dreaming couple. It was Elle, with Kiros in tow.

"Mama, what's taking you so long......Me 'n Kiros were worried 'bout you and Uncle Laguna.....right?" The little girl stretched her neck up to look at the tall Centran. Even then, it was hard for her to see him as tall as he was.

"Yes, we were......Sorry if we interrupted anything..."

Raine shook her head, "Not really.......Well okay, but only just a little" She smiled at her little daughter, bending down she gestured for the girl to come over to her, "Me and Laguna need to ask you a very important question, right Laguna?"

Laguna nodded, sitting himself on the ground next to Raine. Elle trotted over to her mom, sitting on her lap, she curled her tiny arms around her mother's neck. 

"What?" she asked, her child's voice high and piping. 

"Well, what would you say, if me and Uncle Laguna were married?"

Elle thought for a moment, ".......Would that make him my daddy then?"

"Well, Yes......"

"Then......" Elle grinned, the gaps in her teeth showing, ".....I say....'bout time. Me and Uncle Kiros think you two took too long, we think you shoulda done it a looooooong time ago. We were talking about it. Uncle Kiros is really smart....." She stopped for a moment as if to contemplate a troubling thought, "So.....When can I start calling Laguna Daddy?"

Everyone laughed at this bit of innocence, though Elle herself could see no reason why it was so funny to the adults. Such quick decision making was a child's luxury, not an adult's. 

"Right now.....if it's alright with Raine." Laguna answered, waiting for her consent. 

"Sounds good to me......" 

A bright smile washed over Elle's face, and she quickly left her mother's side, into Laguna's waiting arms. He held the tiny girl, his emotions so mixed. Happy that he'd found the woman of his dreams, with perhaps the sweetest kid on earth, sad that he'd have to leave this little slice of heaven so soon....._why now, of all times_? He released his grip on the girl, holding her out so she could see his face.

"Elle, I also have something else to tell you.....can you be very brave?" He waited for her nod, "Okay, You know about the Sorceress, right?" the girl nodded again, "Well, Kiros is here because the Sorceress did something really bad. She killed a lot of innocent people, and you know.......she has to be stopped right?" another nod, "Well, Me and Kiros, we know some stuff that might help stop her, and so.....I'm gonna hafta go away for awhile."

"But.....you'll be back, right?"

"Yup......."

".......You promise?"

Laguna looked at girl, his eyes serious, "Yes, I promise." he stopped, slipping his ring off his finger. It had been a gift from the Shumi, they had said he had a heart like a lion. So they made a ring for him, a little lion adorning the outside band and a favorite Galbadian proverb that he'd taught them on the inside. He placed the large ring in her tiny hands, "I gave your mommy a ring......but I want you to keep this one. This ring is really important to me, it was a gift from some dear friends. I want you to hold onto this for me, so you better be careful with it.....because I'm going to come back for it, for you and your mommy......"

" 'Kay......" Elle grasped the heavy ring in her chubby hands, that was enough of a promise for her. 

Raine looked at her daughter quizzically, "Hey, little miss.....I think someone should be in bed by now......"

The little girl giggled as Laguna swung her upwards into his arms. They walked slowly back to the little bar, night stars twinkling as time ran ever on. Laguna looked at those stars, wondering if he'd ever see this part of the sky again. A wriggle in the back of his mind interrupted the moment. He smiled, the faeries were back. The clouds of memory rolled in again, time warping and twisting until nothing was left but gray fog. 

Quistis woke with a start, looking around the white walled prison cell as if surprised to be there. _What a weird dream_.....She rubbed her head, at least her headache was gone. Selphie lay next to her, fast asleep. Quistis wondered what time it was, curious to know how long she was out. Selphie awoke briefly, looking up at Quistis with her dull  green eyes. The bright sparkle hidden away, perhaps even lost forever to the pain.

"Quistis, you okay?" She asked groggily.

"No......" Quistis looked down at the young girl, and for once she didn't have the will power to be strong anymore. 

Quistis wept, letting out every last bit of pain that she held back for the last 72 hours. It scared Selphie a little to see her superior officer like this, and she too felt more tears well in her eyes. She held Quistis, and together in the dull prison cell they wept. The sounds of their sobs echoing in the empty room. 

Author's Notes--

Okay, finally the Laguna chapter. Hope you liked it. I think Mrs. Blackdragon was about to kill me cus I put it off so long and left her hangin'. Sorry 'bout that. You'll notice I kinda mushed multiple "dream sequences" together, along with the little CG bit from the end. I wanted this one to be poignant  and significant. Revealing the tender layers of story in a highly subtle way. I think I mostly succeeded. There is a fifty percent chance of failure, or rain...I'm not sure which. Huggs to all. 

Love, Peace, n Waffles

Noacat ^-^


	19. Paint it Black

Elysium, Paradise, Eden, all names for the same thing. A place of calm, of peace and harmony, personified in the growing fields of a natural garden. Elysium was where she existed, running the tips of her fingers over the bowing heads of the flowers that covered her field. The dark haired Seraph inhaled the sweet air, never feeling more at peace with the world in her life. She was waiting in her Eden, waiting for her knight. The Angel didn't mind waiting, but he was late. He was always late.....

A sudden breeze ran through the field, causing her to look up. Tilting her head back, she turned her serene face up towards the gleaming sun. A heavenly flower in the Garden of Eden, she smiled, basking in the light. The sky was perfect blue, the kind of blue you'd only see in photographs and movies. Misty white clouds rolling over blue, her smiled widened, praying that everything would stay as it was. That this moment would stay frozen in time. 

Looking into the distance,  she could see dark clouds gathering in the horizon. She frowned, a storm. It would ruin the moment and she still had to wait. Watching, Waiting, Wishing.....the clouds began to move. Rumbling thunderous footfalls, the steps of doom, coming closer and closer, and the storm rushes forward, towards her and Eden. Growing concern marred the tranquility of the moment, the storm was coming......it would never let her have any peace.....following her wherever she went. 

The thunderheads blotted out the perfect sky. Purple black clouds gathering 'round her and for a moment it seemed they weren't clouds at all.....but blood, blood spreading over a perfect blue sky. Pristine. A faded memory surfaced, screaming through her mind like an out of control freight train. The clouds rumbled, a thunderclap sounded as the memories jolted her mind from its complacency. Clawing at her ears, she didn't want to remember.....it hurt......her body dropped to the ground, her knees hitting earth solidly. She ignored the physical pain, ignored the pebbles and bits of dirt that bit into her flesh. The Angel closed her eyes as tightly as she could, trying to blot it all out......_leave me alone_.

She rocked back and forth, eyes closed, hands clamped over her ears. _Go away_....._goawaygoawaygoaway_.....a raindrop plipped from the open sky and landed on her hand. It was cold, and it startled her enough to open her eyes. Letting her hands down, she looked at where the drop had hit. A tiny red smear lay where water should have been. She looked up, confused....gazing heavenward as the storm released its burden on her. Hard heavy drops of rain pelted her, soaking her skin and hair....streaking her clothes in red. Watching each drop strike, she _knew_ it wasn't water, it was blood. 

Tears formed in the corners of her eyes, her field had disappeared. The storm had taken it away and.....A scream caught in her throat. She was at the parade again......the memories had their way with her, they couldn't be kept back any longer. They beat her down, she wasn't a Seraph, an eternal soul lost in her own paradise, her name was Rinoa Heartilly. She remembered where she was and why she had been here and what had happened that she wanted to forget. Voices whispered to her, from with in and without, voices she tried to shut out......**_Angelus_**..........**_Vivificus Sanctus_**...........She didn't want to see, didn't want to know......_ No, go away_ ...Rinoa's body shook, her blood stained hands trembling and her gaze was drawn to the ground in front of her, knowing full well what she'd find there. It was Squall, his body lay there as it had fallen. His death glazed eyes stared at her, boring into her. **_Ecce Angelus_**.....His voice joined the others whispering in Estharian. Yes, she understood but she didn't care about what they might want, what message they were trying to give to her, she wanted them to stop, because all she could see was the corpse of her friend, who had died for her...._ it's my fault, if I wasn't so damn weak_..._he'd still be alive_...**_ Insontis vite_**......should_ have been me_..._all my fault_....**_ Ecce _**....._just go away, leave me alone_.....The voices persisted, becoming louder at her attempt to shut them up, a chorus echoing from a corpse........**_Ecce et Surgite_**..... Rinoa shook her head, she didn't want to hear, _shut up_...._SHUT UP_!!  The Squall thing only stared at her emptily, black tar pouring out of his nostrils, ears, mouth.....and his eyes.....black and corrupted....and...... Rinoa's eyes went wide, and the scream she choked back was released......**_It knows_.**.....

Rinoa bolted upright, screaming as she awoke, her sweat slicked body trembling.  The light bulb in her bedside lamp winked out, the dying filament crackling loudly in the dark of the early morning, snapping her back to reality. She'd left it on last night, left it on every night since......she'd tried to stay up all night again and failed. She looked around, wiping away the nearly dry tears from her face. She was in her old room at Caraway's mansion, it was just a dream. A dream that had plagued her for the last two and a half weeks, ever since that night at the parade. 

Rinoa twisted out the old bulb, flipping off the covers as she padded over to her trash can to throw it away.  She'd gone through a lot of light bulbs recently. Rinoa stared distantly at the bulb as she flicked it into the trash. _Another day_....... _another week_......_time moving on and on, but I'm always stuck in that one moment_..... She'd meet with Irvine today, the first time since he brought her home that night. 

Her father had been so concerned when they'd traipsed in after midnight and soaking wet, her arm broken. At least he acted like he was. Made her go to his private doctor and everything. The doctor said that she was lucky, it was only a simple stress fracture, barely broken at all. She wouldn't need a cast, but she was still splinted, braced and put in a sling. An annoying precaution taken by the doctor, the sling made it difficult for her to do anything. _Which was just fine and dandy for Caraway, heaven forbid I do "Things" _....she thought bitterly.  

She hardly saw reason for it, it'd been two weeks already and her arm felt just fine. The last visit she'd improved remarkably, healing faster than the doctor anticipated. The bruises were gone and it only hurt a little when she moved it. Still, he felt she could use another couple of weeks with her bandages and sling. Rinoa looked down at the sling, brow knotting with anger, it had become a symbol of her defeat and his victory.  

He'd made the staff watch her like a hawk. She loved Vincent, he came as close to a father figure as she had, but the fact that he kept tabs on her for Caraway infuriated her beyond words. He was always there, always asking if she was okay or if she needed anything. Caraway never was, he'd already left. Spending as little time at home as possible, so she could rest. _Nice excuse_...... she made a frustrated grunt, scowling at her sling...._I blame you_...._Stupid sling_....Rinoa grabbed the flap of fabric with her free hand, unclipping it and throwing it across her room. She didn't need to be coddled. The door creaked, and Rinoa jumped in surprise, the world had recently become a strange and somewhat scary place for her.

"Miss Caraway.....are you alright?" 

It was the maid, Rinoa sighed and smiled gently,  "No, I'm fine Eliza....and don't call me that. It's just Rinoa, I've never been Miss Caraway....."

"I'm sorry Miss.....but first names are frowned upon. Got rules, you know. You sure you're alright? I thought I heard you screaming.....so I came up to check....."

"Yes, I'm sure. Just a bad dream, that's all. Thanks."

"Well, then. I guess I'll go about my duties....if you need anything..."

"....Ringy-dingy, right?"  Rinoa smirked, making a little phone gesture with her hand. 

The little maid looked at her oddly and then nodded, closing the door as she left. Rinoa ran her hands through her hair, still tousled from a night's worth of uneasy sleep. She looked around her room, it was the room of a girl that she didn't even know anymore. It was cliché, but very true. The Rinoa who had lived here was worry free, she loved horses and kitties and puppies and still played with dolls, she papered the room with her favorite stars and boy bands. This new Rinoa worried that she might be going nuts, she worried about her friends being executed, about whether or not a Sorceress might destroy the world and how she, just one small young woman, could possibly stop her. This Rinoa knew about loss, the little girl that she had been thought she did....but in the end, that girl knew nothing. 

Rinoa walked over to her bulletin board, gazing at the little cartoons and pictures of her and her friends. It seemed like a million years ago. She plucked a picture from its place on the board, looking at it with weary all too adult eyes. Her face smiled up at her from the picture, giggling as she held onto her friends from another life time. She remembered, that photo had been taken at a skating party. It had been her first time, and she'd fallen down so much that she was bruised and sore for a week. A hollow, wistful smile crept across her face. _Skating parties and kittens_.....she wished her life was that simple, as it once had been. 

It was too late to say that she couldn't handle her life the way it was now. She couldn't go back and become the person in the picture, a happy carefree girl. There was a time, when all this started, when she wished for just that.....adventure and romance,  a chance to forget that she had any responsibilities. But they came back, they always came back, because you can't go back in time and worries just don't go away. _Deal with the present Rinoa, just get on with it_. Perhaps that's why she kept having the reoccurring nightmare. _It was time to move on, Squall is dead. It happened and I can't change it_......As she showered and dressed, her resolution strengthened. She'd been laying in limbo, wallowing in self pity. Rinoa slipped on a pair of blue jeans and her black tank top. It would have to be today, no more waiting. She brushed out her ebony hair, pulling it back into a loose pony tail when there was a knock at the door.

Without even looking she shouted as loudly as possible, "S'OKAY! COME IN!!" 

Vincent entered, a plump little elf of a man, grinning from ear to ear, "Must you shout? I see you haven't improved your manners a bit."

Rinoa laughed, "What?! It's me! Like I'd change! So what's up big soul brudda? One of the maids using my undies for a hat?"

"I certainly hope not! .....So, I assume your feeling better now?" He chuckled, pointing at her sling-free arm. 

She nodded, "Yep, feeling LOTS better......You still haven't answered my question! HA! So NOW who's the rude one!!??? "  She grinned and stuck out her tongue, feeling her moment of triumph fully.

He gave her an exasperated look, "I'm getting there......Gracious, you're impatient! But I am glad to see you feeling more yourself. Puts an old man's heart to rest, we've all been so worried for you." he paused, looking at her nervously, "Especially your father. Now, hear me out before you start yelling! He's worried you might run off again. You don't know how much he's missed you....He's afraid he might lose you again, and......"

"And what?" Rinoa became defensive, "If this is what you came up to tell me you can leave now......" She stopped mid thought, instantly regretting her words, " I'm sorry Vincent.....I just don't want to....."

The old man sat down next to her with a little grunt, "I know....I'm sorry too. I wish there were a way for you two to get along. If your mother was still here, she'd know what to do. I'm just a foolish old man, who sees a little bit of his own daughter in you." He looked over, patting her hand gently, "He loves you, he just has a hard time showing it...... If it hadn't been for your mother, you'd be a stuck up sticky beak too. There was a time, when he wasn't like he is now......She changed a lot of things about your father for the better. When she died, that part of him went with her I think. Someday, maybe you'll understand, at least I hope you will" He paused again, "Oh! Yes, the reason I came up......There's a Mister Kinneas here to see you. He's in the drawing room. Are you feeling up to a visitor or should I tell him to "piss off"?" He smiled and winked at her with those last words.

Looking up, she beamed at him, "Tell him I'll be right down."

Vincent smiled, ruffling her hair before he left. An amused scowl flitted over her face, quickly smoothing over the surface with her fingers. She watched Vincent totter out the door, closing it softly behind him. Rinoa sat there for a moment, contemplating his words. Suddenly regretting her easy decision to leave so soon. She'd changed, even more than she'd guessed. All those years ago, she'd never thought once about leaving. It was a no brainer for her. Leave to live. She thought about her father, and all these years they'd wasted fighting. Was this a second chance for the both of them? A tiny frightened part of her didn't want to leave. That second chance seemed so tempting, considering what she'd been through in the preceding weeks. Now, would it be as easy? _Yes, it is. Don't be a moron! If he loved me so much, if he loved her_....._Why did he leave_? _Why!_............_Who cares anyway!  It's too late now_....._Screw the past_! Minutes later she was ready again, running down the stairs hurriedly to meet Irvine. 

Whipping through the large house, nearly knocking over the staff, it seemed like old times. Many of the long time employees still remember the sounds and the light that the youngest Caraway had always brought to the house. Her laughter echoing through the cavernous halls, the way she'd always run from room to room, as if incapable of just walking. She'd always treated each one of them like regular people, never acting like they were below her. In her eyes, they were equal. She took the time to remember names, birthdays, favorite movies, things most employers would shudder to even think about.  Vincent smiled fondly as Rinoa rushed past him, remembering all the times she'd done it in the past. _It was good to have her back, at least for awhile_. 

Rinoa flung the doors to the drawing room, eager to see her new friend and conspirator. She held a folder in her good hand as she walked in, scanning the room as she entered. Rinoa sighed in mock exasperation, Irvine was sitting in her father's favorite chair, rolling his favorite paperweight over in his hands. The cowboy looked up, a goofy smile spread across his face. 

Still juggling the paperweight, he got up from the chair, "What's up Tiger Lily?" 

"The sky, birds, clouds, stars......Shall I go on?" 

"That's not what I meant, and you know it. I mean, your plan to rescu....."

Rinoa's eyes widened in sheer fury, holding up a finger to silence him, "Shhhhhhhht......garden.....Idiot..... go NOW!"

Irvine shrugged as he continued to play with the little glass ball, almost sorry he'd have to leave it behind. Rinoa made for an exit at the rear of the drawing room, it opened up onto a picturesque veranda. She looked back at him, her face registering her annoyance as she gestured for him to follow. He set down the paperweight, strolling out to join Rinoa. She led him onto the veranda, down a set of steps and into the garden. The garden in Caraway's mansion was truly a sight to behold. Julia herself had overseen its planning, and it was they only thing Rinoa missed about her childhood home. 

She'd always been fond of Galbadian tradition, especially the old Zen gardens that had once been common place in years past. Each bush and shrub carefully placed to maximize the beauty of the garden, no matter where you stood. Textures and colors picked carefully and planted strategically, but in such a matter that it looked completely natural. Her mother had paid special attention to the pathways, winding them through the scenery seamlessly. It was important to the design tradition that nothing disrupted the illusion of its wild yet tamed beauty, especially man made things like paths. Rinoa lead Irvine through these trails, until she came to a little pond in the middle of it. 

Irvine looked around, positively enjoying the journey, "So, what's with all the shushing? Why'd ya lead me out here. Not that I mind and all....but...."

"The room was bugged. Caraway is a paranoiac. It's not just because of me, I'm sure he has other reasons.......the military being what they are......spying on me to make sure I can't leave is just a bonus. "

"Huh? Why would he spy on you?"

Rinoa rolled her eyes, "God, do you have your head up your ass?! _Remember_, when he tried to keep me here the last time? He doesn't want me to leave. Has the whole staff keeping tabs on me........... I don't think he's bugged the garden.....Yet, anyway......"

"And he's the paranoiac?........"

"Oh shut up!" She scowled at him.

Irvine laughed, "Okay....Okay......I believe you! Just teasing......"

"Hey.....Mister.....you don't know how much whining, pleading and puling I had to do to even get you an interview...... He was gonna hire one of his stupid military lackeys."

"Yeah, well.....he did ask a lot of weird personal questions.....Anyway, your plan worked! At least this part, so what now??"

Rinoa held up the folder, and smiled devilishly, "Found out where they're keeping them....... Got 'em locked up in D-district....."

"You've got to be kidding me! I've heard of that place......there's no way we're getting in!! It's Galbadia's premier prison....supposedly impossible to escape from!"

"Pshaw! There's minimal security..... "

"Yes, but the security is kept to a minimum because it's in the middle of the damn desert. Miles and miles of nothing but sand......and only one road." Irvine looked at Rinoa, his words didn't seem to have any impact on her face. She was still grinning, "Okay, your eyes have that crazy light....... "

"Don't be a baby. It's gonna be easy......"

Sitting on a nearby bench, Rinoa laid out her plans to him. It was simple enough, pose as reporters for a weekly technology news show on the brand new high tech prison. With forged orders written on Caraway's own personal stationary, so that there'd be little suspicion. They would impersonate personnel from a tiny, nearly-unknown cable access channel.  She forged the station IDs herself, and she'd done a good job. Looking at them, it would be hard to tell them from the real thing. She also had obtained a cheap video camera for believability, thought it didn't really work. The last bit was a trench coat for her, and a hand held mount for her blaster edge. She'd have to conceal the thing on her and yet be able to whip it out when necessary. Besides, it hurt a little when she'd tried to put it on last night. 

There were only twenty or so soldiers,  as long as they could overwhelm them....they'd have no problem. Irvine wasn't a SeeD, but he was closer than she'd get and being trained by Garden meant he was better than your average soldier. Better than the guards they'd hire for a supposedly impenetrable prison. 

The next part was trickier, because of the magic fields, Irvine would be unable to summon his G.F.. That G.F. was her trump card and she'd worked hard to figure out exactly how to get around this one minor flaw. The main controls for the field were in the middle of the prison complex, and so she'd planed on asking to go there first. Give 'em some sappy line like, take us to the heart of your operation, that  kind of thing. No doubt they'd be proud of their little toys and want to show them off. With limited personnel, the Warden would likely accompany them around, perhaps with a lone guard for security. 

Irvine couldn't bring in a rifle, but her blaster edge was made of hard plastic. She could use wooden pinwheels instead of metal, so she wouldn't set off the detectors. Taking the Warden hostage, she'd make him take the field offline. Now Irvine could use his G.F.s to disable the Warden and the guard, giving them time to find out where they were holding everyone. Rinoa was quite proud of herself, and even Irvine had to admit that it might just work. They finished quickly, Rinoa giving Irvine a list of supplies they'd need for the journey.  She escorted him to the door, trying to look casual, not like they were planning to take off or anything.

Looking around, she gave him a hug, whispering, "See you.....ten pm....." She stiffened suddenly....._was he_...._grabbing_.....Rinoa tore herself from the embrace, face lividly red. She hit him as hard as she could. "ASSHOLE...."

"WHAT?! I thought you were coming on to me......" Irvine grinned unabashedly.

"Yeah.....cus you're _such_ hot man meat....Jackass. If you _EVER_ try that again, I will tear your arms off and beat you to death with them....."

"Ay! AY! KAPITAN!" Irvine saluted, laughing as he opened the door, "You won't tell Selphie, right....."

"Yes, yes I will.....now move it pokey...." She said flatly, pushing him out the door as he tried to cajole her out of tattling on him. 

The rest of the day Rinoa spent lounging, and just generally not doing anything. It had been her pattern of  the last few weeks, and she had to maintain it so the staff would think nothing was up. She found herself watching some awful talk show, t_oday's episode_...._My Mama's a Big Ass HO!_  Rinoa watched impassively as two girls argued loudly while waving hands in each others faces, ultimately ending in a huge cat fight. She'd never been an avid T.V. watcher, and perhaps there was a good reason for that.

Lately though, she had become a sponge for such programs. There was a definite lack of anything to do, the television was just a way to pass time. She stared blankly at the moving pictures on the screen, the show security finally pulled the women off each other. When that show ended she flipped around until she found another that caught her attention..... Watching late into the afternoon and then the evening. Around five her father finally came back, briefly to stop in her room to make sure she was there. Perfunctory hellos were given and he left. 

Then there was dinner, she'd been called down to the main dining room at around six. Dinner with her father, more than just eating and chatting about her day. It was a formal occasion, and she was forced to wear appropriate clothing and expected to show up on time, a routine she still remembered and loathed. Sitting there in her best new clothes, which he bought and picked out, Rinoa didn't feel that hungry. She stared at her plate, moving her food around with displeasure. The air around was tense, he tried to ask her about her day, engage her in conversation, to no avail. Any question was greeted with a one word answer or a grunt. She didn't even look at the man facing her. Her food stared at her, and she knew she'd have to eat it eventually. 

Remembering briefly, the last time she'd stubbornly refused to eat. It was after a particularly bad argument when she was ten, she had tried to storm from the room. He'd made some remark about her living under his home, eating his food, and how much she didn't appreciate the work it took to get those things. Her memory self watched her hand as she threw her glass of milk into the wall right before she got up to leave. The shattering sound silencing her father's rant, glass and milk oozing down the wall. It had been a satisfying moment, for the look on her father's face alone. 

She'd shouted at him, told him she'd rather starve. He was enraged, angrier than she'd even seen him. To his credit, her father had never laid a hand on her. Instead, he just glared at her coldly and told her she'd regret those words. Rinoa had scoffed at the threat. But he made good on it. She'd been grounded, locked in her room the minute she got home from school. That's when all the excess rules started. His attempt to get her temper under control. For the next two weeks, all he would allow her to eat was cold oatmeal and water. The only exception was at school, because he wasn't about to waste the money he spent on her hot lunch vouchers. Finally sick of oatmeal, she gave up....he'd won again and it only made her angrier. 

She scooped up a fork full of potatoes and ate them, not taking any pleasure from the flavor. Her father always liked the "best" things in life, so he hired a professional chef; who made fancy rich people dinners that looked more like abstract paintings than something you'd eat. Cheap food had always made her happier than the expensive stuff her father favored. _As long as it tasted good, who cares_....She'd managed to finish her dinner, and as politely as she could, asked for permission to leave. Inwardly fuming that she had to ask him just to get up from the damn table. It was stupid, pointless politicking and she hated it....hated him even more for making her do it. _Like he's some king on a throne_..... _arrogant bastard_. He dismissed her, watching as she got up and left without a word. Caraway sighed, forlornly looking at his daughter through a crack in the door before it was slammed closed.

As the night wore on, Rinoa felt more and more anxious as the time for her departure came closer. At nine Vincent came up to say goodnight, a pleasant way of saying...._house rules, lights out at nine_. House rules. That's why she left the first time. She smiled and wished him a good night, trying to make her last moments in this place pleasant. He smiled back, backing out of the doorway slowly....his expression oddly sorrowful. Rinoa dismissed it, she was probably just imagining things. She was keyed up, still having another hour to wait before she could escape this prison. For awhile, she sat in the dark and stared at the red glowing numbers on her clock. Time eked by in an irritatingly slow pace, just to piss her off . She closed her eyes, hoping that would somehow speed the hands of time. 

At ten minutes to ten, Rinoa woke with a start. She'd almost missed her own escape time. Trying her best to be quiet, Rinoa slipped off her night gown, revealing the clothes she'd been wearing beneath. She groped at the floor blindly until her fingers touched a pack she'd made ready and stuffed underneath her bed. It contained a change of clothes, amongst other various supplies. The room was completely black, and it took a few seconds for her eyes to adjust. Once the room was visible in the dull light, Rinoa made her way to the door. Opening it and slipping out as silently as possible, she closed the door carefully, holding her breath. Her heart was pounding and every time she breathed in or out it sounded like the furious winds of a hurricane. Sweat popped out on her forehead as she walked from the hallway near her room to the stairs. Each step she made unbearably slow, how in the world had she done it the first time? Ten nerve wracking minutes later, she'd made it all the way to the foyer. She looked at the front door, tempted to just go out that way and wake the Bastard up. 

Since her last visit, he'd installed a silly automatic alarm system. When a door was opened when it was on, sirens would go off and wake the entire house. She'd tried it already, much to the everyone's irritation. Of course he only thought to install in the main parts of the house. He'd left the servant's wing untouched. _Idiot_. Rinoa played it safe, winding through endless hallways until she found her way to the servant's wing.  

Days earlier, she'd been wandering the house and for once without an escort. Finding the door to their wing open was a godsend, propped up with a bent clothes hanger. Her luck got even better, the servant's wing had its own exit to the outside, it too was unlocked and without those pesky alarm wires. Was it mere chance, did they just not expect anyone to care about their quarters but themselves? Rinoa decided _she_ didn't care, it was a fortunate oversight in her favor.  She had made it into the parlor, just adjacent to the dining room which lead to the kitchen and finally the door in question. Halfway into the room she heard a soft metal click, and she quickly rushed over to the door. Her hand gripped the knob, she turned.....nothing......it stuck fast. She jiggled it furiously, _locked_....._it automatically locked_. Rinoa stopped mid-thought, looking around the darkened room frantically. The lights suddenly went on, and all she could do was stand there blinking dumbly.  

"Hello Princess......Going somewhere?"

Rinoa whirled around to face her father, her features tightened into an angry knot. Her thoughts began to swirl and blur with the fever of her fury, "Bastard........."

They both stood there for several minutes, glaring at each other. It took every ounce of willpower in her not to run over there and sock him square in the face. Instead, she crossed her arms, breathing in and out in sharp, angry bursts. Her father waited, a look of wounded sadness on his stern face. He breathed in deeply, shaking his head as he looked at his daughter.

"Rinoa......Please tell me, what in the world do you think you're doing?"

"......What does it look like to you, Genius?"

Caraway sighed again, "Leaving.....you're leaving. Why.....Why do you have to be like this?" He waited for her to answer, all he got was an angry glare, "So.....Where do you plan on disappearing to this time? Balamb....Trabia......"

"......Hell.....Wanna come with?"

Locking the door behind him, Caraway sat down in one of the parlor chairs. "Rinoa.....We need to have a talk. Sit down."

"Bite me."

"Sit......." he snapped at her, pointing to the chair opposite him. She didn't, glaring at him in bold contempt, "Get your ass over here right now or so help me I'll make you...."

The look in his eyes was deadly serious, and for the first time since she could remember she was afraid of him. Indecision wracked her mind, and she nervously tapped her foot as she decided. With a roll of her eyes, she reluctantly sat down, her arms still folded. 

"Look at me....."

She did another O-God-360, looking at him with sour eyes, her lips tightly pursed. 

"Rinoa......This has got to stop. I know about your plans. I know you're going to try and rescue your friends....." 

"How did you know?" she thought for a moment,  mind furiously working. Irvine wouldn't tell, at least she didn't think so......"SON OF A BITCH! You bugged the garden.....God, you're just one paranoid bastard. Well, you won....again. You get to keep me here for a few more days. Happy now?......" 

As she got up to leave, Caraway darted off of his chair and grabbed her by her good wrist. Yanking her back into place, she fell back into her chair with a look of incredulous rage on her face. He was fast for an old man.

"You will sit here young lady and you WILL listen to me. Think for one moment! Do you honestly believe you'll be able to rescue them? Neither of you are trained for this kind of thing. Sure, maybe you'll get lucky...._maybe_. More than likely, you won't even get in the front door before they figure it out and arrest you. My power in the government is waning, my dear. Now that the Sorceress is in control, I have to tread carefully. If you two were to be caught, I might not be able to help you....."

"Who the hell says I _WANT_ your help?" She spit back, trying to keep herself from screaming in rage.

"Rinoa, I'd help you whether or not you'd want me to........"

"Oh, GOD! Spare me......."

The same strange look of hurt passed over his face as he turned his back on her. It was hopeless at this point, nothing he could say would make her change her mind. Caraway wondered how it had got to this point. It was his fault, he knew it. There was nothing he could do.

"I'm a horrible father.....I know that, Rinoa. Despite all that....I love you. You'll always be my little girl. I'm sorry I was never there for you. I'm sorry I couldn't give you what you needed...." 

Rinoa felt as if she'd turned to stone, never in her life had she thought her father would admit to being wrong. Her eyes unfocused as she tried to comprehend what just happened. While she was thinking, he reached over to a package that was laying on the table next to his chair. He handed it to her silently, his face full of earnest compassion. She looked at it, slowly stretching her hand out to take the box. Rinoa opened it carefully, and the color drained from her face as the lid opened and she saw what was inside. It was Squall's jacket, still torn and bloodied, his ring and his necklace lay glinting on top of it. Time slowed as she stared, and it took everything she had to keep from crying in front of her father. 

"How.....I don't understand......" She looked up at him, eyes searching. 

"Those belonged to your friend who lost his life....correct? What was his name?"

"Squall...." She whispered, fingering the fur trim on the jacket.

"Yes, Squall....Well....His friends deserve something to remember him by. I pulled some strings at the corner's office. You should return them to Balamb. He deserves a hero's funeral."

"What do you mean by that?"

He didn't answer the question, getting up and making his way over to the intercom near the door, "Vincent, please escort Mr. Kinneas into the parlor." Caraway waited, a muffled affirmative came back. Turning to regard his daughter, he smiled sadly, "Underneath you'll find everything you'll need to rescue your friends. It's all official. So you should have no problems."

"....WHAT??!!.....Are you helping me?!" 

Once again he ignored her, Caraway opened the door in expectation of Irvine's arrival. Seconds later the tall cowboy arrived, nervously stepping inside the parlor with a tip of his hat. Irvine opened his mouth to say something, but Caraway silenced him with a look. The older man dug into his pocket, pulling out a set of keys which he clapped into Irvine's hand.

"These belong to a SUV that's waiting for you in the front.....There are more supplies in there. Clothes and weapons for your friends......Like I said, everything you need. Good luck...." Caraway stopped, nodding formally he started to leave the room. Rinoa stood up without warning, holding onto Squall's jacket protectively. 

"W-wait.....Dad......" Rinoa gasped, she hadn't called him that in so long, "....I..... Um... Thank you....."

He looked as startled to hear it as she was, stray tears formed at the corners of his eyes, "You're welcome, Rinoa."

Father and daughter gave each other a final look, both realizing that the wounds of the past were on their way to healing. Irvine looked back and forth, not really sure what was going on. Whatever it had been, it was significant. Caraway left the teenagers, his heart at more ease, though he still worried for his daughter. At least there was some peace between them now. Rinoa clasped Squall's jewelry in one hand, slowly pulling her arms into his jacket. 

"Hey....Isn't that Squall's...."

"Yes, it is.........Let's go."

Irvine and Rinoa walked out of the mansion into the cool summer night.  The sky was a pale amber hue, city lights blotting out the stars. All was quiet in the tiny suburb, houses lit up like warm lamps. The car was right were Caraway had said it would be, the pair made for it. Rinoa shivered as she waited for Irvine to open it up. She heard a click and grabbed for the handle, hopping into the car in relief. 

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Getting in.....so we can go...."

"No so fast, Little Lady.....Gotta check the manifest, plus we should figure out what route we're taking......Don't want to forget anything...." He drawled, his east Galbadian accent more pronounced than usual. 

Rinoa rolled her eyes, _stupid military protocol_.  She got out of the car and followed Irvine to the trunk. From the package Caraway had given them was a list of supplies packed in the vehicle. He pulled a pen from his pocket and handed it to her along with the list. Rinoa had remembered this one from countless vacations. Even before her father had become Mr. No Fun he had made lists like these. 

Sighing, she began listing things off to Irvine, putting a little check next to it if it was there. Ammunition...._check_.... I.D. cards......_checkcheck_.....Rations......_checka-lecka-dingdong_.......Gunblade.....she faltered. Yes, her father had said that they'd retrieved his belongs. That old guilt welled up within her again. The sense that in someway she was responsible for Squall's death. That it should be him here, and not her. It forced her to remember what she had tried to do before. That _something_ was wrong with her. 

"Rinoa....you okay?"

Her eyes became glassy as she looked at the shining blade, "Yes, it was just........"

"The gunblade.......Yeah, I know. It's alright." Irvine looked down at her softly, giving her a pat on the shoulder for reassurance, "Remember what we agreed, okay? Can't blame ourselves......Past is the Past......Have to help the others.....'Kay?"

She nodded listlessly, her mind pulling itself back from whatever edge it'd been perched on, and with effort continuing on with the checklist. Almost everything had been marked off, all but a small white envelope. Rinoa held it up, her brow furrowed in thought. _What in the_....She dug her finger under the flap and began to tear it open. 

"WHOA! What're you doing?" Irvine exclaimed, putting a warning hand over the envelope.

Rinoa scowled derisively, "Opening an envelope....is that okay with you?"

"No....it's not. There might be mission specific information in there we're not supposed to know yet." 

"Yeah....well, you don't just put a secret mission envelope in with the rest of the stuff without leaving instructions, right? If we weren't meant to open it, it'd say so."

"I guess but...We should follow protocol and ask Caraway what to--"

"PAH! Screw protocol......" Rinoa smacked his hand away and opened it.

Inside was a tiny red stone with a strange symbol carved into it. Rinoa turned the stone over in her hand, trying to decide what it was supposed to be. She held it up to get a better look at it. Upon closer examination it wasn't a stone at all, but made of clay. The symbol resembled a cup or a basket, set on one side. 

Rinoa frowned, "What the hell is it?"

Irvine moved in closer, looking over her shoulder at the object, "Dunno....Does it have any instructions??" 

Rinoa shrugged as she opened up the envelope to look inside. A tiny slip of paper rested inside, stuck snugly in a corner. If she hadn't looked, she wouldn't have noticed it. She pulled it out, turning it so she could read. 

"It's a rune......" Rinoa paused as she read on,  "There's a bunch of mumbo-jumbo....um.....Peorth.....the rune is called Peorth and it means dice cup? The hell...."

Irvine snatched it from her, she gave a surprised gasp but he ignored her and read on. Things like this were never given without reason, "Hmmph.....Dice cup......it's divination meaning is that of rebirth and new beginnings......symbolic of the Goddess....Hey, there's more. It's a G.F. ....doesn't say which, but you have to break it to summon it. It's for you..........Give it a whirl."

He handed it back to her, she took it, giving him a dirty look for grabbing it away from her in the first place. Irvine was about to advise her to sit before she tried it, one could never tell what would happen when you entreat a Guardian Force to junction. However, his warning came too late, she'd already broken the rune on the ground. Rinoa gasped as a light emitted from the broken rune and enveloped her. He rushed forward, her body hit the ground before he could catch her....only managing to cradle her head, protecting it from a nasty bump on the curb. 

Rinoa was surrounded in bright white, the smell of salt tingeing the air. Waves, she could hear endless waves breaking on the shore. She opened her eyes, her mind buzzing in confusion. _The beach? How in the_.....Rinoa looked around, realizing that the beach was quite far away. She could see its white shore far in the distance. She looked down, expecting a sand bar or the ground of a small island underneath her feet. Instead, her shoes were touching the very top of the water. She made a small squeak as she watched her every footstep make little ripples on the surface. _Water_...._walking on_....._How_.... In her shock she barely even noticed the sounds of music emanating over the waves. A woman's voice sang softly in clear penetrating tones, her long fingers strumming a lyre as accompaniment. 

Rinoa stopped marveling at her feet and lifted her head slowly to regard this new wonder. Her shock from a moment before was nothing compared to this new one. It wasn't a woman who sang with such beauty. Rinoa wasn't even sure what she was looking at. 

It had the shape of a woman but multicolored feathers like that of a bird. The Bird-woman was tall, her skin an unnatural golden yellow in color. Her hands and feet looked quite normal, except for her fingers and toes, which ended in small wicked looking claws. The creature was nearly naked, iridescent feathers surreptitiously covering her breasts and pubic area. She had no hair, her head covered in a thick down of feathers, with two large wing-like appendages sweeping off the side of her head near the temples. Her  features were delicate and looked like they'd been painted on, like that of a porcelain doll. 

She stared a Rinoa with her strange blue green eyes, that seemed to switch between the two colors as the light hit them. Rinoa was paralyzed, her mind racing as she tried to explain what she was seeing. _This can't be happening_...._I've finally gone nuts_...._First the stupid pains, now I'm hallucinating bird women_..... 

The creature spoke up, her tone indignant, "You aren't insane....I am here and I certainly don't appreciate being thought of as a hallucination. Why have you summoned me?"

"Um....." Rinoa's eyes widened, as several thoughts went through her mind at once. _She read my mind_......_What's going on_? _I didn't summon her_......_oh yeah, I did summon her_....._but why_......_what should I answer_....._someone gave this thing to me and_....._that's a stupid answer_.....

The creature studied the girl as these thoughts flickered through her. _How strangely this mortal acts_. It was incomprehensible to the Siren why someone would summon a Guardian Spirit without a reason in mind. At first she thought of dismissing the girl and going back to the pleasant nothingness of non-corporeality. However, curiosity overwhelmed the Siren. Looking closer at the girl, Siren focused in on her very soul. Inspecting every fiber of the mortal girl's being, tracing her lineage throughout the vast folds of time. The Siren gasped in shock, regarding the girl with new wonder. How could one who possessed so much power know so little of things spiritual.

"Rinoa....." the girl jumped at the mention of her name, "Do not be alarmed. May I ask you a question..."

Rinoa briefly thought of asking the creature how she knew her name, but decided against it. She had read her mind before, obviously that' s how she knew, "Y-yes....."

"What do you know of your gift? I only ask, because I find it curious that one with such power would require the aid of a Guardian Spirit...."

The girl's brows furrowed, "Gift? What gift.....and I don't have any power...."

The Siren searched the girl's soul a second time, ".....Sweet child, you know nothing.....How sad and unfortunate for you. But you do have power.....You possess the great gift, given to you by my kind hundreds of years ago. You have no real need for a spirit such as I. Your strength in magic already lies within....."

Rinoa, perhaps unwisely, became angry at the mere mention of this power. It was another painful reminder of the strange events at the parade ,".....I can't cast magic. I don't have this gift you keep talking about.....I'm just a normal girl....."

The Siren interrupted the girl's rant, "It is as it is. You can't change what you are. I don't understand you mortals at all sometimes. Quit feeling sorry for yourself and accept your birth right ...it's for the best." 

"I don't care!! I got in the way and it cost my friend his life! If I hadn't tried to do whatever it was I....I ...." Rinoa trembled with emotion, unable to vocalize what she believed to be the truth. 

"Then you would be dead and all hope lost....." The girl looked at Siren uncertainly, as if wondering what the comment might implicate,  "I have already said too much..... I see that you need guidance and for this reason I shall junction with you. I am Siren, the muse.....Call upon me when you will....." 

Siren bowed her head, her wings covering her as spiraling waves of music spun 'round Rinoa. White light enveloped her again, and she felt oddly tranquil as the spirit merged with her own. Moments later she awoke in Irvine's arms, blinking her eyes to clear away the haze that filled her mind. 

"You know, I'm getting really tired of fainting all the time...." She said, rubbing her sore back side. 

"It's your own fault. Should've waited.....I learned a while ago you never ask a GF to junction before sittin' down......"

She scowled, "Oh, shut up.....Are we ready to go yet?"

"Yep...." Irvine turned and went to the back to shut the trunk. 

Rinoa went around and jumped into the passenger's seat. Irvine appeared a few seconds later, sliding into the car, map in hand. They went over their route briefly, agreeing on places to stop and sleep. Irvine jammed the key into the ignition and started the car up. They drove out into the night, car moving out of the city and into the distant mountains ahead of them. 

Hallo! How're y'all doin' out there? Good? Wonderful. I'm fine. Sorry about the wait for this one, hopefully yer all still with me. Extra special thanks to all my reviewers! I love each and every one of you so much. As always, if you have any questions...etc....email me or go to my livejournal and we'll talk. On a personal note, of all the chapters I've written so far this one is my favorite. I'm also going to relate a small story to you....Five years ago I read Lord of the Rings for the first time and I came to the part where Gandalf died. I spent the next half of the second book thoroughly convinced that Gandalf was indeed not really dead. I was anxious and upset and my fiancée laughed at me, because he knew. I was relieved to get to the chapter where he reappeared, but that sense of urgent tension about when he would come back never left me. In fact, Tolkien's ability to hold your attention in that way impressed me. Guess what I've done? heehee......


	20. Welcome to Paradise

Quiet time, dull and monotonous time that stretched out into infinity as the hands of the clock moved so slowly. In the bleak gray walls of the prison the days passed ever so leisurely.  Days, they blurred together, separated by the infinitesimal differences in their activities. Week after week the same things happened. Routine was observed religiously, all in an effort to maintain order and discipline within the prison's population. Three days of the week they worked, one day for exercise and recreation, the last three days spent in your cell. Quistis thought that she might just die from the boredom of it all. 

Today was one of their down days, where they had nothing to do but stare at the walls. Work days were always more interesting, as well as more dangerous. It meant contact with other inmates, and that was a deterrent to joy. Though luck did work in their eventual favor. At first both girls had been harassed quite badly by the lonelier large women, who looked at these beautiful newcomers with lust in their eyes. The harassment was particularly bad at recreation time, when the inmates were allowed to roam more freely. 

Quistis made a good decision weeks earlier to let their status as SeeDs slip. It kept all but the boldest away. There were a few stupid enough to tempt fate, and met the brick wall that was formal SeeD hand to hand combat training. The best part was, neither Quistis nor Selphie would get in trouble for it, as they'd both agreed to only use techniques that didn't leave visible marks. Selphie, as it turned out, was very good with pressure points and had reduced a three hundred pound monolith to tears with an expert jab of her finger. The girl spun around like a whirling dervish, arms and legs blurring as she struck her opponents with soft blows. None of them had taken her seriously, because the areas where she'd struck were quite painless at first. Until a few moments afterwards, when they were doubled up with pain. It painted the younger SeeD in a whole new light, as Quistis had never expected Selphie to be quite as formidable as she was. Timid, sweet Selphie kicked more ass than she did! The few fights they engaged in keep the rest of the prison populace out of their hair. It had certainly made work much easier, and recreation time more relaxing. 

Their status as SeeDs also resonated with the guards and administrators. It had been noted that an upward spike in inmate trips to the infirmary had coincided with their arrival. Though, of course, there was no direct evidence. Solitary confinement had been threatened, but by that time no one was bothering them anymore. Being so dangerous, at least according to prison administration. They'd been placed in the women's laundry room, of course not with the chemicals or heavy equipment, but sorting the dirty laundry. It was icky, stinky work, that neither girl liked much. Selphie, ever the whiner, complained the loudest. However, Quistis had ceased to be annoyed by her, anyone would have complained in their situation. 

In an effort to ease boredom on days off, they'd taken to pilfering the cardboard backing for shirts. Quistis managed steal a pen from a guard, and with that and the cardboard she'd fashioned a crude deck of cards to play Triple Triad with. This day, however, neither felt much like playing cards. It had been at least three weeks, if not more, since the parade. Quistis had figured that they were due for swift execution.... though she guessed that the Sorceress had something else in mind. Perhaps the old bitch was figuring on turning them like she did Seifer. Maybe she just wanted to torture and interrogate them. Whatever it was, Quistis just wished they'd do it soon and put an end to all the waiting. The boredom had really become too much to bear. 

Each girl sat on their own bunks, in silent contemplation. Quistis stared blankly at the underside of Selphie's bed, trying hard to not care about what lay in the future. Selphie could be heard in her bunk, fidgeting as she threw a wad of paper at the ceiling. 

"Quistis.....I'm bored....."

".....Me too....." 

"Do you think Rinoa and Irvine are okay?"

"I hope so....." Quistis sighed, it had been awhile since she thought of that regret, "....If she hasn't already killed Irvine...."

"He's not that bad...." Selphie said defensively, stiffening when she heard a giggle come from below.

"Yes, he is....His charm has blinded you, my dear....." 

"Meanie....." Selphie replied, with a raspberry, ".....What about Zell? I wonder how he's doing?"

"Who knows.....I bet he's as bored as we are.....worse probably. All this quiet must be driving him nuts."

Selphie smiled, "Yeah...I miss him....I miss them all." She fell silent for a moment, determined not to be weak and give into crying again, "Do you think we'll ever see them again?"

"Dunno.....I guess.....I really hope so. I miss everybody too. It's just....Not to be morbid, but....I'm just surprised we've been kept alive so long......" Quistis stopped, annoyed at herself for saying something like that in front of Selphie. She'd tried so hard to keep those worries from the young SeeD. 

"Hmmmm.....I wonder why?" 

This shocked Quistis, it didn't seem like Selphie to be that clear headed. She expected some sort of refutation, like why wouldn't we be alive, don't be so negative!! _I should just stop putting people into categories_...._that's my damn problem_. She liked this newer Selphie much better than the scared little whiner from before. 

Quistis sighed, "Well.....My guess is they're waiting to interrogate us...."

"Yeah....but....that's just stupid! What do they have to wait for? Not like we're going anywhere!"

Quistis pondered the thought for a moment, _Why haven't the interrogated us_? She shrugged, "Who knows..."

A moment or two of silence followed. She could hear Selphie move around above her. The constant fwish of the paper ball ceased. Suddenly Selphie's head popped down from the bunk, causing Quistis to yelp in alarm.

"GOTCHA!!" Selphie giggled, enjoying the chance to stretch out her tired muscles while testing her acrobatic ability. 

Quistis didn't reply, knotting her brows and giving the young girl a look of mildly humored disapproval. 

Still hanging upside down, Selphie spoke breathlessly, "What day d'ya think it is?"

"Not a clue.....Why??"

"Cus if I knew what day it was....Well, just because it'd be nice to know...."

Quistis rolled her eyes as she sat up, extending a finger to bop Selphie on her nose, "...Because if you knew what day it was, then you'd know what was on TV. Right?"

"NO!!" Selphie barked, her face struggling as she'd never been a good liar, "....Okay, yes."

This elicited another roll of the eyes from Quistis. She snorted, "Predictable! Television rots the brain......"

"I hope it's Thursday. Degrassi is on, on Thursdays....." Selphie smiled wistfully. 

"Oh , You're just a sucker for compelling teenage drama.....We have enough _real _problems to deal with here.  I hardly think it's useful to watch thirty year old teenagers with fictitious ones....It's a waste of time." Quistis said, trying not to sound too sarcastic and momentarily horrified that she sounded like Squall. 

Pausing again....how easily had that thought come, like he was still alive. It was hard not to think like that. Hard for her to admit he was really gone, but he was. Both girls had struggled to stay upbeat and positive, it was all they could do to stomach their situation. She'd reopened an old wound, and with great effort kept herself from drowning in a flood of tears. Selphie didn't seem to notice, and had begun to hum to herself. It irritated Quistis a little, but she couldn't really blame the girl. _It's not like I always wear my heart on my sleeve like she does_.....Quistis thought, looking at the silly face of her friend....it was hard not to laugh. 

She scowled bemusedly, "Hey....Could you please just come down here or I could go up there or something?"

Bopping her head from side to side with her tongue out, Selphie grinned and put on her most innocent face, "Whyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeee?"

"Because, talking to you upside down is just......disturbing and creepy....Plus, you might fall." Quistis's brow knitted as she spoke, waving her hands in the air as if that explained everything. 

The locked clicked on the door to their cell, neither girl paid much attention to it. Periodic bunk inspections were the norm, more than likely just guards who felt like raiding their room. Not that they'd find much, the SeeDs had been clever when it came to hiding contraband. Though the person in the doorway was hardly who they expected it to be. 

"HAAAAY BABY!!" Zell shouted, a large and decidedly goofy grin plastered on his face. 

Selphie made a little squeak and promptly fell off the top bunk, nearly landing on her head. Quistis was at first quite shocked, then relieved, then curious and finally stifling a laugh at Selphie's predicament. She quickly knelt down to make sure the young SeeD was okay, finding it hard not to snicker just a little bit. _I did warn her_....It took less than a microsecond for Selphie to recover from her fall, she was up and running, nearly knocking Zell over with the shear force of her embrace. 

Tears and laughter were intertwined in her greeting, that was basically unintelligible. "OMIGODAREYOUOKAYI'VEMISSEDYOUSOMUCHICAN'T BELIEVEYOU'REHEREWON'TYOUGETINTROUBLE!!!"  

".....breathing... becoming... an... issue..." Zell choked, his face going red, but happily so. 

She released him, still smiling as tears washed down her face, "Sorry, I'm just really happy to see you!!"

Zell chuckled, "That's a first! You happy to see me!" 

"HAY! What do you mean by that!! Of course I'd miss you, stoopid!! Didja miss me??" Selphie said, wiping at her face, a shy smile shining beneath the spent tears.

He ruffled her hair, giving her his own gentle hug, "'Course! You're my favorite annoying little sister type! There was no one for me to tease, it was boring without you!" 

Selphie beamed, hugging him tightly for a second time before letting him go, though keeping an arm around his shoulder. All the while, Quistis watched with contemplative joy. It was like watching a family reunion from far in the distance. Zell turned his gray eyes to her, the light that sparkled within them clear and effervescent. This whole thing hadn't changed him, his spirit hadn't been dragged through the mud. It had only made him stronger. _In a way, I think it's made us all stronger_.....

 He spoke softly, taking the edge off his normally jovial tone, "Hey Mama Jama....How ya hangin'?"

"That's not proper the proper way to address your superior." Quistis replied blandly, immediately smiling to let him know she was joking.

"AW! I'm sorry Teech!!" He grinned, letting Selphie go and bending down to hug her, "Nice to see you, Trepe Sempai..."

"That's Quistis to you......Nice to see you as well."

Quistis accepted the embrace, closing her eyes in relief. Finally, she was in on the reunion, not merely watching from afar. All three laughed, and though genuine, it had a tinge of bitter sweetness to it. For the first time Quistis got a good look at Zell. She was puzzled, noticing the subtle bruising around his face and arms that she hadn't seen before; mostly because she was just happy to see him period. 

Selphie asked before she had a chance to, "Hey, what's the deal with you bein' out and all?"

Quistis nodded, gesturing at his injuries, "Yes, and it seems you had something of an adventure...." 

Zell grimaced, scratching the back of his head with a hand, "Well.....Let's just say.... Me and one of the guards had something of a disagreement about the treatment of prisoners. Over this guy...." He stepped back, revealing a mid-sized cat-like creature....its fur a bright fire red, "I'm not sure what he is but, he brought my block all our meals. This one guard was always beatin' on him. Said he was too slow and I just couldn't take it anymore. So I pounded an animal rights lesson into his skull, literally. Seeing as I was in trouble for kicking a guard's ass I figured I might as well try escaping too. And here we are, all caught up! I named him George...." 

George made a noise that was somewhere between a bark and a meow. His large blue eyes gazing up in adoration at his savior. The little cat-creature trotted up to his new master, nuzzling a leg affectionately. Zell smiled softly, scritching the back of George's ear, a contented purr coming from the animal. 

"AWWWWWWWWW!! THAT'S SO CUUUUUUUUUUTE!!" Selphie squealed, she kneeled down, holding out her hand, "Hey, George......Come to Auntie Selphie....." 

The little animal looked at her cautiously, creeping up to her with slow careful steps. Sniffing and backing away a few times, until he felt it was okay to give her hand an experimental nuzzle. Sensing it was okay, he became friendlier, much to Selphie's delight. Quistis looked on, rather unimpressed and eager to move on with things. If they were to escape, it was no time to be petting stray...cat... things. 

"Zell....I'm curious....I have about a million questions....but foremost, How in the world did you find us?? This place is huge....We could've been on any floor..."

Zell looked nervously at Selphie, "Um.....Selphie......Did you tell her?"

"'Bout what?"

"You know....the dreams......"

"No....Why? Should I have?"

"Well, didn't you have one?!"

"No....did you?" Zell nodded, garnering a look of puzzlement from Selphie, "Hmm.... So how's Laguna and the crew?"

"Don't know. I was in Ward.....Saw Kiros briefly but....."

Quistis listened in on the conversation, at first not understanding what in the hell they were talking about. The minute they began mentioning those names, her mind went rocketing back to that strange dream she'd had. A dream that had seemed entirely too real. 

Quistis interrupted their conversation, "Wait.......These dreams......Those names......I've dreamt them.....Are you saying.....I mean, I dreamt about that Kiros. I went to Winhill......I met a guy named Laguna.......What the hell is going on? Explain, NOW!" 

"Don't know where to start...." Zell began, shifting from foot to foot, "Well, it was on our way to Timber. We got on the train and were about to get settle in, when Selphie said she didn't feel well. Then this headache thing happened.....only worse. Like you were being ripped from your body. When I "woke-up" I was in someone else, least that's what it felt like. After awhile the whole scene faded and I was back in my own body. And....." He trailed off, looking at Selphie for help.

Selphie continued for him, gesticulating as she explained, "And when we all woke up for real, we found out the three of us had the same dream. Like we shared it or whatever. We talked about what to do and ....Squall, he said that..."

"We should save it for later, just concentrate on our mission. Things happened, and I guess we just all forgot because it didn't happen again. Until now....." 

Quistis looked from face to face, her mind working fast, "Right. So if I had a dream and you did...who was the third? The last time there were three of you....Why didn't Selphie have one?"

"Dunno. Not like there's some kind of precedent for this kind of thing...."

"So how does this all relate to you finding us?"

"Ward, he worked here awhile back. I don't think the dream world and ours are in sync. I think what we're seeing is the past. Anyway, he was the janitor here. I spent what seems like a coupla weeks with him. Got to know this place like the back of my hand. Galbadian security sucks ass, they haven't even changed some of the codes since Ward's time. It was easy to find you using his access codes, and the guard's keycard."

"Clever....Can you figure a way out?" Quistis asked, her azure eyes locked on him. 

"You betcha!" Zell piped happily, "But whatever we're gonna do, let's do it now. Ain't got no time to plan....Sooner or later, they'll find that guard. I'm thinkin' we go up. " 

He handed Quistis the service pistol he'd stolen from the guard, he preferred his fists anyway. She examined the gun, pleased to find it was a Desert Eagle. SeeDs were expected to be able to use a variety of weapons in combat. She'd taken the required fire arms courses, and the Desert Eagle had been one of the hand guns they'd used. 

 Zell looked at Quistis, the normal hyperactive exuberance dissolving into the resoluteness needed for battle. She returned the gaze and quickly turned away to check the clip, relieved to find it full. Flipping the safety off, she sidled over to the door and laid flat against the wall, holding the weapon tightly at the ready. Selphie and Zell were at the other side of the door, waiting for her signal. She nodded and Zell cautiously opened the door. Spinning out, she brandished the gun, looking from left to right all the while training the gun on possible targets. Nothing. She flipped the safety back on, and waved her compatriots out. 

Zell was out like a shot, immediately taking point as he ran down the empty hallway. The little cat creature he'd saved padding softly at his side, intuitively anticipating his savior's motions. Zell hugged the wall, moving swiftly towards the stairs at the end of the circular hall. Pausing, he waited for Selphie and Quistis to catch up. Quistis came up behind him first, slipping past to prepare for her next sweep. 

Zell whispered furtively before she made her move, "We're heading up one floor to the control room. It'll be on your right as you exit the stairs, wait for me before you enter….." 

She nodded silently, darting towards the staircase with feline grace. She held the gun out in front of her as she ascended the stairs, her grip firm yet relaxed. Taking each step confidently, her eyes cold as she glared at the empty stairwell. The entrance to the next floor loomed, she pressed herself against the wall. Shifting her grip on the gun so she held it upright, ready to strike, yet hard to yank from her hands. Inching towards the entrance, she whipped out, extending her arms as she scanned the area with gun raised. All was safe. Clear. 

He led them over to the control room door. Punching in codes quickly, he ran the card through the reader. Hopefully, this code had remained unchanged as well. As the card left the strip, screaming klaxons blared and the overheads were cut off, emergency lights blinking on in warning. Metal barriers whirred over the exits, as the automatic defense systems came online. Quistis spun around, facing a large yellow robot with a painted on face glaring menacingly at her. _God, do they  even know how creepy that is_? She squeezed the trigger, trying her best to aim at what she thought might be vulnerable spots. Meanwhile, Zell struggled with the reader, cursing a blue streak as he tried different combinations. Selphie pushed him out of her way with surprising strength for her small size. Cracking the case open, she manipulated the wires with nimble fingers. The doors whooshing open at her command. 

Quistis had begun counting off her rounds, annoyed that the machine hadn't gone down yet. It just kept ambling towards her, the same goofy grin on its face. _Damn thing hasn't even fired_. Sudden warmth flowed from her shoulder, the ping of metal reverberating in her ears. It had come close enough to her to target and fire. _Fuck_. _Two more shots and I'm out_. Ignoring her wounded shoulder, she aimed and squeezed. The bullet connecting with one rounded eye, the satisfying sound of pierced metal came shortly after. An internal gear exploded and gray smoke belched from the hole she made. The machine chugged, and fell over like the useless two ton paper weight it was. She smiled, though it faded as another robot took its fallen brother's place.  Selphie grabbed her arm roughly, pulling her towards the control room. 

Zell had already entered and grabbed the nearest guard. The man's companion in the control room went for his gun, aiming at Zell. Lifting the weapon, his hands suddenly went slack, gun clattering to the ground. Blood trailed dismally from the gunshot wound to his head. _Quistis_…Zell took a moment to look back at his wounded leader, as Quistis and Selphie quickly closed and barred the door. The first guard tried for his weapon, something he'd forgotten to do when the SeeD grabbed him. Cold steel greeted the back of Zell's head. Zell turned around and with a quick twisting of his hips, he grabbed the man's wrist. The movement so fast, the guard barely even had time to be surprised. The SeeD unbalanced him, bending his hand outward and thrusting him to the ground. Zell now had the man's face flat on the ground, and with a final twist, the young SeeD broke his arm. The gun popping from the guard's grip harmlessly. Selphie picked it up, switching on the safety and stuffing it in her waistband, she went to the computer terminals. Working quickly to disable the prison's defenses as fast as possible. 

The sounds of Selphie's rapid fingers tacking away at the keyboard, and the moaning of the wounded guard were all that filled the room. She'd managed to disarm the robotic guards on floors five, six, and seven, but was having trouble with the rest of the floors. Selphie suspected that there were smaller computer stations on one of the lower floors that acted as a fail safe for just such a situation. Though it didn't matter, once she deactivated the magic field not much could stand in their way. She was now working on the firewalls that protected the stairwell gate protocols. It was taxing work, and the guard's constant moaning didn't help her concentration. 

"Can you gag him or something??" She asked, not looking to see if they did.

A moment later the guard's voice became muffled, and then quit altogether. Finally able to concentrate fully, Selphie's eyes narrowed as she poured her entire being into her work. While she worked at the computer, Zell had begun to minister Quistis's wounded arm. He'd scrounged up a first aid kit, and tenderly cleaned and wrapped the abrasion. The bullet had luckily just grazed her arm rather than puncture it. He didn't have the equipment to properly dig it out if it had. 

"You know, you could have really been hurt. You should have aimed more carefully." Zell chided her, packing up the first aid kid to take with him, just in case.

Quistis gave him an angry glare, "Hey, I'm no gun expert. If I had my whip, that thing would've been in pieces. I aimed as well as I could. All things considered, I think I did pretty well." 

"I'm just saying, we have to be careful. If one of us really gets hurt bad….."

"I know….Will I still be able to shoot?" 

"Probably. Likelihood goes up if Selphie gets that field down. One good curaga and you'll be as good as new." 

Quistis briefly wondered if they might interrupt the girl to ask how she was doing. The intently serious look on her face said no. She'd tell them when she was done. They would just have to wait until then. 

Quistis looked over at Zell, "You think she'll be able to do it?" 

"Yeah. She's pretty amazing. I saw some of the stuff she did in Timber. Had no idea what she was doing….but it was still pretty amazing stuff." 

Quistis nodded as she got up to look for more supplies. Zell had turned his attention to the bound guard. Giving him an injection of some sort while he worked on the arm he just broke. George followed him over, curling up near Zell as he continued to tend to the guard's wounds. Quistis dug through various drawers, and became increasingly frustrated when she found nothing of real use. She came to a large locked drawer. Staring at it quizzically, she wasted no time on thought. This was what she was looking for. 

"Zell, check his belt for keys." 

He did as he was told, unclipping a jangling key ring and tossing it at Quistis. Hand extended, she caught the keys without blinking. The next few minutes were spent trying keys that looked like they matched the keyhole. She turned over key after key until she found the right one. Her hunch had proven right. Inside was a map with the emergency exits and computer terminals highlighted and a nice big shot gun, plus scads of extra ammo. It was true with the fields down they didn't have to use weapons. But one of the things that they'd always been taught was not to rely on magic and Guardian Forces alone. If you could use your weapon and save your spells for later, you'd be better off in the end. Having an extra punch when you really needed it, instead of blowing your load on the little guys. 

She readied the ammo bag, pulling out some dry ration packs that had also been stored. It had been awhile since any of them had eaten and it'd be a long way on the road. Slinging it over her shoulder, Quistis turned to Zell and tossed her pistol at him.

He caught it, giving her an oddly frustrated glare, "What's this for?" 

"Just in case." She answered firmly, carefully loading slugs into the shotgun. 

Selphie suddenly piped up, "Magic field's coming down. Hold onto your butts!" 

Quistis was overcome with nausea, a dull thickness that overwhelmed body and mind. She reached out for the wall, using it to support her weight as she stood there dizzily. After a moment or two, the worst had subsided and she inhaled deeply to help speed up her recovery. 

"Ready?" She asked, a wavering note of uncertainty in her own voice.

"As ready as ever…." Selphie answered, sounding a little urpy herself. 

Zell staggered over, stopping to steady himself, he reached Quistis. George gave a nudge to one of his hands, licking his palm gently in encouragement. Zell smiled weakly, patting George on the head appreciatively. _Thanks buddy_…His hand gently reaching out, engulfed in bright green light as he healed her wound completely. 

Quistis smiled at him, it was so like him to help someone, even if he was suffering. She'd have to remember to tell the headmaster that when they got home. Still struggling with the effects of the downed field, the trio made ready to leave the control room. Selphie positioned herself on one side of the door, gun drawn and ready,  Zell the other, while Quistis stood in front. Zell opened the latch to the door, notably not touching the pistol Quistis had given him; leaving it in the waistband of his pants.  With a swift kick, Quistis opened the door, shotgun raised. She marched out into the corridor, taking point while Selphie and Zell trailed behind her. They made it out of the 7th floor with little trouble and not one guard. 

Descending to the sixth floor, a bullet hit the wall right in front of Quistis. She hastily ducked, cocking the shotgun, she popped up hurriedly and took aim. Corking an elite soldier right in the chest, ducking down as they fired back. Selphie did the same, only more rapidly, lighting off two or three shots and taking two more soldier's lives with them. 

"How many?" Zell asked, still refusing to fire a shot. He hoped Quistis would understand his aversion to guns. 

"Least six more…." Selphie answered, her voice strained as she shot and talked at the same time. 

Zell closed his eyes and concentrated. Eyes snapping open as he released a green cloud of poisonous smoke that closed around the soldiers. Screams of  pain could be heard, and one lone soldier stumbled out, clawing at his skin. The SeeDs left the Galbadians in agony, running down the hallway towards the next set of stairs. The fifth floor was more of the same, they ran for the next floor. Klaxons were still blaring on the fourth, and Selphie had to stop to find the remote access to disable them. 

As they descended the third floor, and feeling quite confident; they were stopped by a contingent of eight more soldiers and a least a dozen of those machines Quistis had fought earlier. They exchanged fire rapidly, wasting round after round with little effect. Only managing to take out two of the mechanical guards. After twenty minutes they'd run out of ammo, and Quistis was about to just give up and use a spell. An unexpected explosion cut her effort short, and the trio braced for the shockwave. Robot and human parts, blackened from the fire, blasted past them, hitting the walls around them. Selphie was the first to open her eyes, looking herself over first and then the area around her. Miscellaneous shrapnel and torn body parts lay all around them, black smoke smearing their faces. 

Quistis opened her eyes, and regarded Selphie, "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm alright….you okay?"

"I'm fine….what about you?" Quistis turned to Zell, her dirty face knotted with worry.

"Just great…." He answered, eyes opening as his face scrunched up in disgust. He rubbed the back of his neck, he'd been hit with a piece of shrapnel. Nothing serious. He checked to make sure George was alright. Reaching down, he pet the creature's soft fur, and it meefed in response. Relieved, Zell inquired, "What the hell happened?" 

Quistis shrugged, shocked to see Selphie peeking over the barrier without reservation, "Wait, Selphie…"

"WHAAAAAAAAT!" Selphie interrupted loudly,  "Not like anything's left to shoot at me. Look for yourself. Everything's 'sploded." 

Quistis carefully peered over the barrier, eyes widening at the vast amount of destruction in front of her. Smoking bodies laying on charred floor. The trio stood up, dazedly walking towards the blast area. All three too amazed to speak, wondering briefly what had happened. _Perhaps one of those machines malfunctioned. I took one of 'em down with just a hand gun. Shoddy Galbadian craftsmanship_. Quistis thought, looking over the mess on the floor as she passed it on the way to the stairs. Thick black smoke still belched from the ruined machines, as fires within their broken shells still raged. She squinted as she walked through the smoke, hold her hand up to her face as she strode into the vortex of ash. Engulfed in the smoky ruins of their enemies, it had become harder and harder to breathe. 

Shirts were pulled over their noses, filtering their air and making breathing a bit easier. It was a long walk for such a small distance. Unable to see, trying to navigate obstacles in pseudo-darkness, the few feet to the stairs seeming much farther away than it was. Zell had scooped up George and stuffed him under his shirt as well as he could. The little creature was heavy, but Zell was proud to admit he was stronger than he looked. Still, it was a tiring effort and he hoped the end was near. George squirmed, as if agreeing with Zell's sentiment. _I can't take much more_….Zell huffed, his pace faster than that of his companions. Selphie, being the smallest, had the most trouble, he small lungs finding it harder to deal with the dust. Quistis lagged behind to help her, Zell would stop…. feeling like something of a beacon to the two girls. He pushed them as hard as he could, the longer they stayed in this mess, the harder it would be to get out of it. 

Coughing as the smoke choked theirs lungs, going from just walking to a light jog towards clearer air. Zell made it out first, setting down his charge as he let out a series of hacking coughs. Another series of coughs ensued, little tears squirted out the sides of his eyes from the effort. His chest heaving up and down, Zell wasn't aware of much with the exception of his burning lungs. The Martial Artist was so intent on his own recovery, he didn't notice the Galbadian Cowboy sneaking up on him. He made the mistake of tapping on Zell's shoulder, jokingly. Zell grabbed the hand, twirling around and pulling the arm down. His opponent swinging around, in his complete control. As he was about to lock the wrist, in total victory, Zell's face dawned with recognition. He let the Cowboy go, the tall man flopping on the ground, clutching at his wounded hand.

"HOLY SHIT! KINNEAS!" Zell exclaimed, helping Irvine to his feet, "So sorry….Didn't know it was you."

"S'okay. I should have known better than to sneak up on you like that…Good to see you're alive. Though I wasn't expecting you to already have escaped…."

"Thought I'd save you the trouble….Good to see you too Buddy…." Zell actually smiled, and clapped the Cowboy on the arm. He was impressed. Never figured Irvine for the loyal friend type. It was a shock to be sure, but one he gladly embraced. 

The girls had finally caught up, taking time to sit down and collect themselves. Still hacking and coughing, breath coming in hard gasps. Selphie got up, wheezing, and staggered over to Zell. Bleary eyes barely recognizing the man Zell was talking to. 

Selphie's eyes widened, a beaming smile spreading on her face, "IRVY!!!" 

The Cowboy winced as he rubbed his wounded arm, unprepared for Selphie's own sneak attack. Tiny arms encircled his neck, her body striking his and nearly knocking him over. She hugged him as hard as she could, until he made mock gasping noises to get her to let go. That only seemed to encourage her to squeeze harder. 

"Seff…. choking…bad…breathing good…yes?"

Selphie withdrew, tears of joy cascading down her face, "Sah-rry…." 

"Aw, it's okay….." Winking as he cocked his head, his wide blue eyes inquisitive, "Hey, what's with the tears?"

"I'm happy to see you, you big dummy!" She laughed, swiping carelessly at her face. 

"So don't cry, goofy….Glad to see you too by the way.." He grinned, ruffling her hair affectionately. 

Selphie smiled widely, giggling and blushing girlishly. Quistis frowned, turning disapproving eyes from Selphie to Irvine. She felt the beginnings of a lecture coming on. Having almost choked to death from whatever spell that damned Cowboy had cast. 

"So I take it, you were our savior…." She said, gesturing to indicate the devastation behind them, "Little over dramatic don't you think? I don't know what they teach over in Galbadia Garden, but at Balamb….displays of power like that are frowned upon. You could have done the same thing with less….and did you even think to try a spell that wasn't as destructive?  I mean really…." 

Before Irvine could give her an irritated reply, they were all nearly knocked off their feet by a sudden jolt. All looked around wonderingly. Another jolt came, sustaining itself in even vibration. The party grabbed for the nearest wall or guardrail to steady themselves.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" Quistis shouted over the din of noise that went along with the vibration. 

Irvine shrugged, his face knitted in consternation, as if he knew more about what was happening than he acted. From the other side of the room came a figure, gaining speed as it came closer to the huddled party. It was Rinoa, wearing Squall's jacket and quite out of breath. 

She made a beeline for Irvine, ignoring the looks of shock from everyone else, "This place is going into lock down. We have to get out of here now!" 

Author's Note--

Alrighty, I hope that the fight in the first part was good enough. I toiled over it and bugged a couple of people until they cried to get it just right. Um, this is the most boring author notes ever. I have nothing else to say apart from I hope you like this. The next few chapters focus entirely on Irvine and Rinoa. So don't be confused when I don't continue with the time line set up here. I'm gonna do some back tracking first, to show what Irvine and Rinoa were doing up until this moment. Then we'll go back. Just an FYI. 


	21. The Road to Memory

The sun peeked over the horizon, golden light slowly filtering through the trees. Green leaves turning iridescent yellow, dew glittering like diamonds over their slick surface. Birds buzzed in the canopy, noisily chattering amongst themselves. Flitting from branch to branch like busy city commuters. It was the kind of languidly cool summer morning that gave no indication of the heat that afternoon would inevitably bring. 

Rinoa woke gradually, her eyes sluggishly opening and closing while the noise of the morning went on unheeded. With a wide yawn, she stretched and shook the sleep from her limbs. Pushing herself up, she rubbed her eyes with balled fists. It took a few moments for her to register her whereabouts. Blinking as she scanned the gray interior of the SUV tiredly. _Yes, we spent the night in the car_.... Her neck cramped, and she rubbed her sore spot tenderly, easing the muscle with gentle massage. She shivered, the morning air still chilly and moist, wrapping her blanket around her. Rinoa gazed at the front seat, blankly noting that Irvine was there. He lay sprawled across the front seat, head propped up in the passenger's side, hat tipped over his head and covering his face. His feet resting on the driver's side, boots still on. 

They'd traveled a full six hours straight from the moment they left Deling, stopping just before they reached the mountains, at about three in the morning. It was a pretty good start, though they probably should have pushed on farther. It'd be another three to four days before they'd reach D-District at this rate. Irvine had reasoned that they were both too tired to keep it up. Better to stop than to get into an accident and have unnecessary encounters with authority types. It had been hard enough getting out of the city itself, god knows they didn't want to go back. 

Her father's passes had helped, as most of the troops were still loyal to him. At least, for the moment they were. With a Sorceress in power, the stability of the Galbadian Government and those organizations it supervised were in question. Rinoa and Irvine had noted the strong military presence on the road as well. Troop transports were a common sight, and there were frequent check points. Both of them realized that their stops would have to be kept to a bare minimum. The more places they were spotted, the easier they would be to track. They'd get supplies this morning, and be on their way. Both agreeing to occasionally make stops like this to rest. 

Rinoa put on her jacket and her boots, glancing at Irvine before she exited the vehicle. Exiting the vehicle, she walked over towards the entrance to the bathrooms. Opening the scarred door quietly and entering the cavernous rest room. She looked in the mirror, her sadly tired face staring back at her. Was she really up for this? Was she strong enough and smart enough to make this work? 

_I think you are_....whispered an ethereally sweet voice....Siren? ..._Yes?_.... I didn't know you could talk to me when...well, you know... _Of course, don't be silly_..._and_ _don't worry, you're not alone...I'm here and so is your friend. You used to be more confident_....I know, but...._But nothing. I am here to guide you. You should practice._ .... Practice what?..._Magic_...._Ask your friend, he'll help you_. Rinoa began to object... _None of that nonsense. Practice_. She sighed, suddenly remembering her piano teacher she'd had when she was five. The old woman wouldn't let her get away with anything, and it seemed Siren was much the same. 

Rinoa reached down and turned on the spigot, running her hands underneath to test the water. _Cold_...._dammit_. With a sigh, she splashed her face with the water, gasping as it hit her face. Blinking away the water, she grabbed blindly for a paper towel and dried her face. She yawned again, slightly annoyed that the old saw about cold water waking you up was total bullshit. Rinoa padded back out to the car, mentally listing all that had to be done before day's end. 

By the time she got back, Irvine was awake and waiting outside for her. Leaning on the bumper, he greeted her with that same flashy movie star smile. 

"Mornin' gorgeous! Was I or was I not a perfect gentleman last night?" 

Rinoa rolled her eyes, "I can't believe you want credit for not molesting me while I slept, you're _UNbelievable_!!" 

"Aw, that hurts my feelings!" He pouted, giving her a well practiced wounded gaze, which he'd used to great effect many, many times.

"Oh fine!" she threw up her hands, "You were a gentleman. Thank you so much for not feeling me up when I was vulnerable! Satisfied?" 

He grinned triumphantly, loving the reluctant way she complimented him, "So what's on the plate for today, Mah Sassy Lassie?" 

"Stop flirting! Can't you be serious for two seconds?!" She barked at him, irritated by his superficial attitude. 

"What's wrong with you?" he asked as she glowered at him, something she'd done a lot of late, "You've had it in for me ever since we've left! I was just trying to be nice....besides, most normal girls LIKE IT when guys flirt with them. It's called having fun with life. You remember fun don't you? Or did that die too?"

Rinoa froze, unsure if she ought to be angry or burst into tears. He could see her retreat into herself. He saw it day by day, the spirit that shone so brightly, slowly diminishing. It frightened him, and he tried everything he could think of to keep that spark alive. What had happened was awful, but to let your spirit die because of it was unthinkable. Irvine had lost some friends to despair like this, and he hated it. Because so often it was a losing battle. He didn't want to see Rinoa fall into that same trap. She was a nice kid, and in getting to know her, a good friend. 

"I'm sorry. I know you feel bad. But I can't sit and watch you waste your life like that! I'm worried about you....I...." Irvine trailed off, suddenly feeling uncomfortable with the flow of conversation. 

Rinoa smiled softly at him, finally understanding what Selphie saw in Irvine, "I'm sorry. I was being a butthead." She paused thoughtfully, "Irvine, promise me something?"

"What?"

"That you'll stop being such a shameless flirting man slut." She said, brown eyes twinkling with regained life. 

"WHAT?! MAN SLUT! I..." He stared at her incredulously. "I was being sincere!"

Rinoa held up her hand, "Yes, _MAN_---_SLUT_. You have to stop, because Selphie likes you and it'll break her heart if you don't. So promise me, no more come ons, no more flirting!"

"What about harmless teasing? Or gentle sexual innuendo?" 

"I'm serious!" She pouted, whacking him on the arm roughly, "....Fine..... Harmless flirting okay, I guess I can't expect overnight change. Least try not to be so damn overt. I want someone to be happy."

Irvine smiled, his face becoming shy and boy like, "So, did she really say she liked me?"  Rinoa nodded, "Aren't you breaking some kind of girl code telling me?" 

"Yes, I am. But I think it's important. Because I think you like her too, but you have your rep to hold up. I think you two could be happy....together.....She needs someone. Hell, we all do. I'd like at least one person to come out of this unscarred. It might as well be her. She's ...."

"Innocent...." He said it quietly, letting his Cowboy facade slip momentarily, "Am I that transparent?" 

"No, I'm just unnaturally observant. It's a creepy thing I do." She grinned, wriggling her fingers at him, "See, I'm spooky!" 

He laughed, "How did it go from me cheering you up to the other way around?" She shrugged, which made him chuckle again, "You're a piece of work, you know that don't you? Hey, I think we oughta try junctioning some spells and practicing a bit o'magic. Up for it?" 

"Read my mind!" 

With a smile and a nod, he gestured for her to follow him and began to walk towards a woods that stood at the edge of the rest area. They entered the tiny wooded area, following a lightly trodden path that lead deeper into the wilderness. Irvine wanted to make absolutely sure no one saw them, and so he walked on. Heavy boots clomped through the tangled undergrowth, as they moved farther and farther from their vehicle. Rinoa hoped that Irvine remembered the way back, as she tried to keep up with him. His long legs traveled farther and faster than hers, and she found herself nearly tripping over the brush trying to keep on his trail. Fumbling with branches and vines as she hurried. 

He stopped when he found a small clearing that would serve his purposes. Rinoa hadn't been watching and bumped into his back in surprise. He didn't seem to notice. Rubbing her nose, she watched the Cowboy as he took off his trench coat and draped it over a convenient branch. Irvine set to clearing out the undergrowth, he'd need a place for them to sit and concentrate. He motioned her over to help him. Together they pulled weeds and small trees from their holds in the earth,  settling on the ground once they were done. 

He held out his hands and took a deep breath, looking at Rinoa expectantly. When she didn't immediately do the same, he spoke up, "Um.....gimme your hands." 

"WHAT?! Dammit Irvine I...."

"It's not what you think! I have to transfer some of my magic to you, this is the way you do it...Now quit givin' me your guff and hold out your hands...." 

"Oh....Sorry...." She said, smiled sheepishly as she extended her hands and held them over his. 

"Good." He said, clasping her hands in his with an annoyed look.

Irvine closed his eyes, hoping Rinoa would follow suit without him having to tell her again. He concentrated, focusing his mind just as he'd been taught. A part of him dearly wished one of the others were here to do this. Having only just junctioned, transferring Para-magic from one person to another was hard. Both of them could use guidance from someone as experienced as he guessed Quistis was. _Desperate times, desperate measures_..._yadda yadda yadda_...Irvine searched the part of his mind where his G.F.s resided, locking onto the whitish light of his junctioned spells. He picked an even assortment of magic to start her out on, low level spells she'd have no trouble with. With a gentle push he transferred them to her through their physical connection.  He could feel her shudder as they rippled through her. _Success_! 

Rinoa opened her eyes, feeling strangely dizzy "Is that it?"

"Yep, sure is. Now we'll start with a simple fire spell..." 

Rinoa looked around at the dry field, brown grass and bushes with the husk like remnants of leaves hanging off gnarled branches, "Uh, do you think that's a good idea? Shouldn't we start with something....um....less destructive? Like a cure spell or..."

"Nope...." Irvine shook his head, "All magic is based on the strength of your spirit, the Shumi call it chi. If your heart and mind aren't in it, you can't cast. When you're not wounded, you don't really need a cure spell....you don't have the chi necessary to successfully cast the spell. Offensive spells are easier to start with because you can cast them anytime you wish. You don't have to have an immediate need to use them." 

She nodded, still reluctant to try and cast the spell. If Irvine wasn't worried, fine. But she was still bothered. _Fire_...._like that spell I tried at the parade_.....Rinoa felt herself tense...._just don't think of it_. 

"Rinoa, you ready?" Irvine asked, for what seemed like the tenth time. She nodded slowly, and he frowned uncertainly, "Okay, I want you to close your eyes. Just for this first time, and concentrate on your breathing. Leave your mind blank, and breath in and out slowly. Paying attention to each breath." 

She did as she was told, listening quietly to his instruction. He asked her to imagine that she was holding a candle in her hand. From the darkness she formed the image of a candle in her mind. _Look into the flame_...her eyes focused on it, becoming one with the flickering light. _Now imagine the candle has disappeared_.....in her hand, the candle slowly faded, leaving only the flame. It hovered above her dreaming mind's hand, once again she found herself staring at it wonderingly. _Now take the flame, and hold it in your hand_.... she closed her fist over the flame, unperturbed that it didn't even hurt as she held it in her closed palm. 

"Keep breathing in and out....good.....now open your eyes, but keep your hand closed, okay?" She nodded, and he gave her the okay to follow his direction. 

Rinoa blinked furiously as she opened her eyes, adjusting to the bright light that spread over the clearing. She looked down at her balled fist, wondering what all that accomplished. "What now?"

He stood up, helping her to her feet as she had no good arm to do so herself, "Well....extend your arm, aim and open your hand......and give it a real good push.....Go ahead."

Rinoa tensed again, slowly aiming at the bush and opening her hand. With a slight push, she willed the flame to come forth. A tiny blip of fire licked from her palm, only flitting two inches from her outstretched hand.  

"What was that?" Irvine realized she'd tensed, he needed to loosen her up, so he ragged her jokingly, "Seriously, because I don't even think I saw it! That bush should be roasting right now.....see, cus it's a fire spell...FIRE. We want flames, _plural_." The last word he said with an incredible drawl, lengthening the sound out as he mocked her further, "That was sad, I mean really. I've seen eight year olds make bigger flames lighting their farts with a....."

"Shut up! I'm nervous and this is my first time!" 

"Sorry, but just trying to motivate you. It's a teaching technique....you know, to get you emotionally into the situation. Makes casting easier. Try again, kay?"

She frowned and stuck her tongue out at him, and wondered why she just didn't kick his ass. Instead, she took a deep breath and tried again. _Magic comes from chi_...._chi is your spirit's power_....._this is stupid_......_Irvine is a big dunderheaded man whore and if it were socially acceptable, I'd light my sad little flame under his stupid ass_..... Narrowing her dark eyes, she hated it when people treated her like a little kid. Hated it when they thought she couldn't do something. The simpering tones in Irvine's voice as he chided her echoed in her mind. _Like he's some damn expert_..... With every thought she became angrier. 

She stared at that bush, and though she knew it was impossible, it mocked her with its very existence. Rinoa pushed with all her will to obliterate that stupid mocking bush. Irvine was about to chide her again, for daydreaming instead of preparing her magic as he'd instructed. When a sudden blast of fire erupted from her open palm. It was set upon the target, the bush and surrounding field bursting into furious flames. Irvine nearly fell over due to the shear force of the blast. He watched in awe as the field burned, wondering if he might have accidentally given her a higher level fire spell than he intended. Then it  dawned on him that the field was on fire, which he hastily put out with a water spell. 

"That was really good, Rinoa." He stammered, mentally noting to never again to try motivating her with sarcasm,  "Um....I gave you just a regular fire spell, right?"

Rinoa nodded, staring at the blackened, smoldering field in surprised wonder, "I think we better go....."

Less than ten minutes later they squealed out of the parking lot, trying to put as much room between them and the rest area as possible. For a good hour or so into the trip, neither spoke very much. Stopping for lunch, they finally felt more relaxed, being more than twenty miles from the rest area. They briefly discussed Rinoa's need to work on her control, and Irvine taught her a few mediation techniques he'd learned. Both thought it'd be best if she waited and learned from someone who knew just that much more than Irvine did about magic. After lunch, they  went into town and bought supplies, before rocketing out of town. The car blazing its way through the jagged hills that lead to the mountains.  A glinting streak of silver, streaking through the deep orange evening. 


	22. Nightmare's Veil

The rest of their trip was relatively uneventful. At least, neither of them managed to set anything on fire. Around midnight, they had decided to stop at yet another rest stop. This one was smaller than the last. No pop or candy machines, not even a bathroom with indoor plumbing. A single light illuminated the small parking lot. In the small space allotted, there stood four picnic tables with grills and in the far corner a pair of outdoor johns. Rinoa shuddered at the thought of having to use them at some point. But there was no choice. This was the last rest stop for another hundred miles, and they had to pull off. 

They'd been driving for twelve hours straight, only stopping for ten minutes here and there. Both of them were beyond exhausted. They'd made it through a major portion of the mountains that was at least one thing they'd managed to do right. One more horrible twelve-hour drive and they'd be at the prison. It seemed so simple and at the same time very daunting. 

Rinoa parked the car, relieved to finally be pulling the key out of the ignition. She sat for a moment, listening to the clicks in the engine as it cooled. Irvine had been asleep, and woke slowly; keen SeeD senses noticing that they were no longer moving. 

"Mmmm. Stopping for the night?" he drawled, she nodded in silent reply. He laughed a little as he stretched, "Funny. I'm not really sleepy."

"I told you not to take a nap. Though, I'm not all that tired either."  

Irvine opened the car door, looking out over the rest stop, "Hey, follow me." 

"What?" Rinoa looked at him with confusion as he exited the car. She shrugged, cocking her head as she watched him make his way into the park. He stopped and glanced back at her, giving her a wave to follow. 

"C'mere. I wanna show you something." 

Rinoa hesitantly jogged up to meet him, "Depends on what it is."

"It's not like that!! Freakin' A! You're paranoid as hell. Knock it off." He answered, his brow furrowed, "When I can't sleep, I like to go out and look at the stars. I pick out the constellations....it's really relaxing." 

Irvine led her to a small overlook, where the sky could be easily seen without the cover of trees. He flopped onto the ground, spreading arms and legs wide. Smiling, he motioned for her to do the same. Rinoa sighed deeply and rolled her eyes, and reluctantly lay down near him. Looking towards the night sky, her eyes took in the stars. They sparkled brightly in the deep blue sky without the glaring light of the city to compete with. She sighed again, this time with contentment. The stars had never been this clear for her. Irvine tapped her on the shoulder and pointed to a cluster of stars. 

"Okay...Look up there....see the stars that kinda form a cross?" He asked, his finger moving over the stars indicated.

Rinoa squinted and searched the sky, it took her a few moments but she found it. "Yeah...."

"That's Apodis the dove. According to legend, Apodis was so overjoyed at Hyne's defeat, that he decided to proclaim it to the earth and the sky. So he flew without stopping for an entire year. Telling both god and man about the demon's death. At the end of that year, he was so tired that he fell down and died. The gods, in thanks for his hard work, lifted his body and set Apodis in the sky. So that all would remember his dedication." 

"Wow... what about those....the three bright ones." 

"Hmm.... That's the first sorceress, Vega..." he talked as he pointed out the stars, outlining them with his finger, "...and the other group of stars is the first knight, Deneb. The two constellations together are called the Erasmiades. It's said they shared a great love for each other, and that it had been the key to defeating Hyne. Their devotion was so strong that neither could live without the other. She gave him the strength to fight and he protected her spirit. But in the battle, Deneb was mortally wounded, leaving Vega grief-stricken. She died of a broken heart, still holding Deneb in her arms. The gods were so touched, that they gave them a place in the sky forever."

Rinoa thought for a moment, a feeling of sorrow at the loss of some unknown connection that she only just became aware of. "That's incredibly sad. Are you _trying_ to depress me?" 

"No."

"Well, you're doing a marvelous job." 

"Sorry. I'll change the subject...." He paused to look over at her, noticing her face relax a little, "So what makes you think I like Selphie?"

"Besides the fact that you said so?"

"No I didn't. I just hinted I MIGHT like her. Never said I did. You just assumed...and when you assume..."

Rinoa rolled her eyes, "You make an ass out of you and me....yeah, yeah, yeah...."

"So, what makes you think that?" 

"The way you talk about her....not to mention the fact that you've been blithering on about her non-stop for nearly twelve hours....and the whole time you make this funny little face.  Plus, the corners of your mouth twitch when I say her name." 

Irvine scowled, "What face? What twitch? You're talkin' crazy, Woman!!"

"Selphie." She said, peering at him with eyes sparkling. The corner of his mouth twitched and he clapped a hand over it. 

"That's only because you said something....not because I like her." He snapped, giving her a look of disgust and jabbing his finger at her.

"Liar. Just admit it already. I saw the way you looked at her over my father's. You can't hide that kind of stuff from me." 

Irvine sighed, looking up at the night sky for solace, "Fine. I like her. I..." he stopped, and thought briefly about telling her his secret. The one he promised himself he'd never tell any of them. _No, I can't. She wouldn't understand_.... deep blue eyes softening with self-imposed solitude. "It's just.... She reminds me of my first crush. A long time ago."

"That's....that's the sweetest thing I think I've ever heard come out of your head." Rinoa replied quietly, her mostly negative opinion of the sharpshooter changing just a little, "You know. I take back all the mean things I've ever said about you. Okay, not all of them, but some." 

"Thanks, I think. You know. The story of Vega and Deneb....It reminds me of something...." Irvine began, wondering how to approach his next rather uncomfortable turn of subject. 

"What?" 

"Remember what I said earlier? About you not having fun anymore. I....I'm just worried about you, Rinoa. I know we're not best friends. Hell, I've only know you a month...but.... You have this hard shell you put on. Even now, you try and act so strong, but you're not really. I just want to make sure you're okay. Because you haven't talked much about what happened. So....if you need to talk...I'm here. I just don't want you to throw your life away, like in the story...that's all." 

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You loved him."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." 

"Now who's the liar?! You're not the only one who sees things! You loved Squall. And when he died, something inside you died with him. It's scary. And as a friend, I just want to make sure you're okay. I don't want you to give up on life."

Vincent's words echoed back to her, with sudden frightening repercussions. That connection she'd pushed back in her mind burst forward. She had been blinded by the subtle tricks of her own mind. Becoming the serious princess, the haughty leader who only wanted to get things done. Who yelled and cursed and threw fits, till everything went the way she wanted it. It was the Forest Owls all over again. The walls she had started to tear down, slowly rebuilding themselves while she remained unaware. She'd become cold and hard again, like her father had after he mother's death. 

"Oh god....I've become my father...." Rinoa whispered, wrapping her arms around herself and stuffing her hands into the inner lining of Squall's coat. 

Her fingers stumbling upon the hidden pocket, and drawing out what lay concealed within. A picture, it was a picture. The white backing of the photo greeting her as she held it aloft. She turned it over and gasped when she saw what it was of. Irvine had been looking at the sky, giving Rinoa a moment to contemplate the weight of his words. He could only hope she would listen. He glanced over at her, her quivering form illuminated by sharp moonlight. She was crying again.  

"Fuck....I'm sorry....I didn't mean to make you cry.....Aw! CRAP! Please stop...I'm sorry..." He said hurriedly, grimacing at his own stupid manlike reaction. Usually he was better at this kind of thing, but she'd caught him off guard. 

Rinoa sniffled, gently fingering the picture, she handed it to him without a word. Irvine took it, nodding somberly. It was one of Selphie's pictures taken at the Grable building. A rather lovely close up of Rinoa that Squall must have saved. _I knew it_! Irvine thought in bittersweet triumph. No, he'd known long before that. Rinoa claimed to be so adept at reading people, but she hadn't seen then what he had. She'd never known until this moment. That first day Irvine had met all of them; he knew there was something between Squall and Rinoa. An undeniable connection, that both of them seemed to be completely blind to. _Now it was gone_.

He put an arm around her as he had countless times in the last few weeks. Feeling so damn guilty. It should have been Squall, the one who saved this picture, doing the comforting. _Not me_.... _If only I had shot sooner_...._dammit all to hell_.  He gave the picture back to Rinoa, and put his best foot forward. 

"You know.... he wouldn't want this. He'd call it a waste of time, and then he'd get mad at you and tell you to focus on the mission." 

"Then he'd add a whatever in there, for the full surround sound Squall experience..." She said with a slight laugh, wiping away the tears, "You're right. I know you're right. About all of it. I've been avoiding the reality of it, because I'm scared. But you should have seen the look Quistis gave me. She blames me, I just know it. They all will. How can I face them?"

"Don't be silly. You weren't the one who....it wasn't your fault. Accidents like this happen. And Quistis hardly blames you. If it hadn't been for her, you'd be in prison too and then where would I be?" 

"Back at Galbadia Garden, hip deep in women...."

"Well, now that you put it that way...." 

She socked him on the arm, "Butt-hole."

"Hey, you said it not me!! Hit yourself!" 

Rinoa merely smiled sweetly in response, tucking away the picture and laying back to gaze at the stars. "So what's that one called?" She asked, pointing at another grouping of stars.

Irvine flopped on his back, contemplating her question for a moment before he launched into his next explanation. The heavens watched in silent communion, celestial bodies glinting and dancing in anticipation of the reunions ahead. 

Rinoa sighed contentedly, sprawling arms and legs wide as she lay in her Eden. Gazing up at the softly bobbing heads of the flowers above her. The field rippling as a silent breeze tumbled over it. The only sound was the rhythmic swish of the nearby ocean, and the occasional sea bird's lonely call. Once again, Rinoa found herself waiting for her knight. At the moment, she didn't mind, she could stay here forever and not mind. Though through experience, she knew that this dream would fade as it had before. It'd end up in the same place it always did. Pain. Death. Apocalypse. Rinoa frowned, it had been awhile since she was last here and she was loath to give up the good part of the dream. Dreams don't last forever....they are, after all, dreams. 

She closed her eyes tightly; trying to will the darkness away despite the fact that she knew it was fruitless. Balling her fist, she hit the ground in sheer frustration. She was tired of being helpless against the coming darkness. Most of all, she was tired of just waiting. If he wouldn't come to her by god she'd come to him. Rinoa stood up suddenly, eyes snapping open forcefully, full of determination. She took off running as fast as she could through the rustling field, the storm following rapidly on her heels. 

Streaks of green and gold flying by her as she ran faster and faster. In her own mind, never seeming to go fast enough. As if she was running on a treadmill, her feet unable to find sufficient purchase. Gradually, the field did disappear, the scenery slowly changing. Grass and flowers dying off slowly, withering as if burned by some internal fire, the one peaceful scenery swathed in a dusky gray mist. The ground was cracked and dry, her footfalls sending up puffs of silent dirt. She was in the wasteland, a strange no-where place, without time or hope. The storm now surrounded her as if waiting to see what she would do. Rinoa stopped and looked around. She'd been here before. In the middle of the desert was a gunblade buried deep in the earth. _Ecce_....

Rinoa gasped for air, feeling tears form in her eyes. She choked them back, calling out Squall's name desperately. This wasn't the normal course of the dream. This was new, unexpected and moreover, downright disturbing. _I'm waiting_...._I'll be here, so if you look for me_..... His voice called back to her, Rinoa became more desperate. 

"WAIT!! WHERE ARE YOU!? I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!" She shouted, waiting quietly for the reply. 

His voice whispered slowly, sounding near and faraway at the same time..._I'll be waiting. In our field, I promise._  Looking for the source, She aimlessly wandered around the area near the gunblade, calling out Squall's name. For what seemed like hours she did this. Her voice tiring, her throat as thirsty and dry as the wasteland itself. Tears streaking her dirty cheeks. Why couldn't she find him? Rinoa abruptly erupted into a coughing fit, her throat was choked with dust and could take no more. Rasping huskily, the coughs racked her body, the force of it driving her to her knees. Coughing turned to retching. Screaming as she puked out black bile from her nose, eyes and mouth. _Insontis vite_....

Irvine had been having a rather nice dream. It involved at least a dozen nubile co-eds, all of them naked in an overlarge hot tub. He was about rub some oil on one of his new girlfriends when his dream was interrupted by a piercing scream. Jolting awake, he sat up and looked at Rinoa as she flailed on the dew-covered grass. She was having a nightmare of some sort and from the looks of it a real loo-loo. 

Her face was sticky with dry tears, face contorted in pain as she moaned and struggled with whatever visions were tormenting her. Irvine sighed deeply, it had become so hard to hold Rinoa up and he was very tired. It seemed she never got any better, the pain only worsening with every step towards their goal. Perhaps it would have been better if he'd left her behind. _She'd never stand for it and you know it_. He thought with a weary grin. Irvine gently shook her shoulder, and waited as she awoke. 

She gasped and bolted upright, eyes wide with fear. It took a few moments for her to adjust to her surroundings and remember where she was. They'd fallen asleep in the field after talking about stars nearly the entire night. Shakily she rubbed her face, bleary looking over at Irvine. 

"Nightmares?"

She simply nodded; she still wasn't one hundred percent awake. 

"Wanna talk about it?" Irvine asked, expecting her to answer no. 

Another shake of the head, "....It's all jumbled. Hard to explain. Maybe later. Tired now."

Irvine smiled, "It's about him, wasn't it? You know, sooner or later you will have to talk about it. It's eating you up inside. Hell, it's eating me up"

"I-I can't...." 

"Rin, it's not like I wasn't there. Not like I don't blame myself for what happened. If only I'd shot sooner..." Irvine sighed in frustration, his face struggling with emotion,  ".... None of us would be here. But we are. Talk to me." 

Rinoa looked at the cowboy warily as he looked at her with earnestness. _Trust him_. Siren whispered from within. _Why should I_? she hissed back_. People are more than the sum of their parts, my dear and wisdom does not often come from the most obvious source. You must shake your burden; he will bear it for a time_.... Rinoa frowned; annoyed that Siren chose to speak in riddles rather than telling her plainly what she meant. She knew enough not to ask, Siren seemed to like answering questions with more questions. Rinoa was not in the mood. 

"At the parade... Something happened." She looked down, finding it difficult to come up with the words, "I didn't tell you exactly everything that happened. I think there's something wrong with me." 

Irvine looked at her doubtfully,  "Like what?"

"I don't know how to explain it. Squall and Seifer were fighting.... I saw the sorceress and this feeling overcame me. My whole body felt lighter, everything was on fire. I reached out my hand and there was a flame...there shouldn't have been. I wasn't junctioned...It just came out of nowhere. So I just stared at it, amazed. Then the sorceress.... and Squall saved me." Rinoa finished, her voice choked with emotion and on the verge of tears. "I think I might be like her. Siren said I had a lot of power.... plus this. Only people like...._ her_...can use magic without junctions. I'm just afraid that...."

Irvine laughed and Rinoa shot him an angry glare, "What?! You're a sorceress? That's just stupid! I'm sorry to make light of your story, but there's a perfectly rational explanation. You experienced your first limit break! It's fair to say you were stressed out, and your adrenaline levels were probably pretty high. Bingo. Limit break! It's a perfectly natural occurrence. So quit worrying."

"BUT!!"

"But nothing. You're not a sorceress. Why is everything extremes with you? I remember my first Limit Break. I was training with this wicked monster simulator. I was fighting a Grendel by myself for the first time. Bastard managed to get in a real close attack, nearly tore my arm off. So I freaked out and started shooting like crazy. Totally shredded the sim...the only reason I even stopped was I ran out of ammo. Man I thought I was really in for it, but my instructor just laughed at me. Still haven't lived it down. You're first experience with your Limit is always weird, but you'll get used to it once you can control it. Come on, let's go. Geesh, had me all worried over nothing." 

He ruffled her hair and she gave an indignant yelp. Heading towards the car, they shook the morning dew from their clothes. The rest of their very long journey lay ahead, and there were many miles to go before their rest. The mountains blurred into hills which blended into flatlands, which blurred into the dry scrub of the desert. Rinoa watched the scenery pass, the pale rust of the rocky desert floor whirring by. She turned her head to look out the windshield, noticing that she could see the spires of the prison looming slowly ahead of them. In less than thirty minutes they'd be there. How long it seemed.

Authors Note-- 

Hey y'all! Nice to see everyone again. Thought I'd update before the wedding and stuff....cus I won't be around much....for a bit. I'll get some rest and hopefully be updating more often. Anyways, enjoy this chapter....yes, it's not much on the story line, but I wanted to stray a little bit for character development purposes......and it builds tension. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!! 


	23. Lessons Before Freedom

In quiet emptiness Siren floated, vaguely aware but unaware, thoughts twining through each other like vibrant tendrils of light. Time meant nothing to a Guardian Force, but she was vaguely cognizant that it'd been years since she'd let herself be junctioned to a human. Everything was so alive and awake, thoughts constantly buzzing through her mind. She had realized that it had been too long, and that junctioning with this girl was the best thing she could have done. Siren had access to the girl's memories, feelings, her every thought and it was intoxicating. 

The young sorceress was one of the Children of Fate, humans who had been predestined by prophecy to hold the world's existence in their very hands. Just like the children of old many thousands of years ago.  All the heavens were buzzing with talk of it, and each Guardian had a chore to insure that the children succeeded. Siren's duty would turn out to be one of the hardest. While it was certainly quite alive in her charge's mind, there was a terrible sense of hopelessness that pervaded all her thoughts. Being in a sorceress was quite different than merging with any normal person. Siren could feel the power surging in this body, and she knew it was weighing heavily on Rinoa. Sending her to a dark place that had to be avoided. 

Hyne had given a bit of his own power to create the first sorceress. He had hoped at the time to destroy that purest of souls with his corruptive power. Turning a giver of life into a dealer of death. Cursing her beloved to be subservient to her, only able to watch helplessly as the woman he loved transformed into a thing of hate and malice. However, he had made a mistake, giving her that part of his power that was untainted and pure. The lesser amount, as it was called in the tales of old. The greater amount, that was bankrupt and corrupted was taken with Hyne into death. 

This mistake had allowed humans to cast magic without aid. The Gift or the Curse, a double edged sword. A sorceress was indeed endowed with incredible power, however as a mere human she did not possess the physical or mental endurance it required to wield such power successfully. To have the sorceress's gift was burdensome, its weight too much for a woman alone to bear. Many times over the thousands of years that sorceresses walked the earth, the sheer weight of their power threatened to overwhelm them. 

This small victory might have pleased Hyne, but once again he was mistaken. Thinking that the knight he created to serve would be too weak to resist his sorceress's demands. Over the years the Knight's purpose became clear. When the first knight and sorceress fought for their lives, they had laid down the path for future generations. Hyne had underestimated the sorceress as he underestimated her knight. Thinking that the man would stand by and let his lover be consumed by darkness. He was so very wrong, the knight fought bravely. His sword piercing Hyne's black heart before his curse could be completed. Wounded and near death, the knight turned to his lover for a last goodbye. The young couple's bond was strong, and their wills set. Neither would serve the Hell God's purpose, turning to each other to find strength. This single act allowed the sorceress to conquer the darkness that nearly consumed her. Allowing both to die in peace, knowing their task was finished.  

From that time forward, the bond between sorceress and knight was considered a sacred thing. A knight was trained to love his sorceress, not obey. To help her bear the burden of her power, and give her hope when she saw none. For a knight to fail his sorceress was tantamount to him failing the world, as Hyne's curse would finally be fulfilled. Siren thought back to Adel and how her knight had failed. With a new sorceress on the loose, repeating Adel's crimes, it seemed that darkness had once again threatened to cover the world. This girl was the only hope they had, and Siren was having a time keeping her from falling as well. 

It was hopelessness that Rinoa fought now. Her power though new and undeveloped, was still too much for one young and untrained sorceress. She needed a knight desperately. The young man who traveled with her, Irvine, had unknowingly served her well. Keeping her from drowning in a pool of her own sorrow. Still, the girl needed a bond that was much deeper and long lasting. This was nothing more than a temporary fix Siren had fostered in order to keep the girl sane. Rinoa needed her own knight, the one that had been chosen for her since birth. Even then, Siren did not know if he would accept his fated place without complaint. The boy was stubborn, willful, and she didn't think it'd be so easy for their bond to grow as it should. Especially since they had so little time. They were near, Siren could feel it, taking a chance on looking through her charge's eyes to see what lay ahead. She lay silent, leaving the girl to her own thoughts. 

The spires of D-District pointed heavenward, striking towers of metal that proclaimed human ingenuity's triumph over the natural world. At least those were the thoughts that ran through Rinoa's mind as she stared up at them. They had finally arrived at the gates, she had sat there silently and let Irvine smooth talk his way in. Which by the looks of it, he was more than capable of doing on his own. Handing over their orders to the guard inside the little bullet proof kiosk with a well placed smile. The guard didn't return the sentiment, ignoring the cowboy as he walked back inside the tiny station house to call and confirm their access codes. _Special Agents in charge of the official Galbadian Military inquiry Codenamed, Parade, requisitioned to interrogate accused terrorists about SeeD and all pertinent details regarding Garden_. It made Rinoa's eyes cross just reading it. 

While the guard's back was turned, Irvine gave her a sharp elbow to the side. Rinoa started, realizing that she'd be day dreaming again. Rubbing her ribs, she assembled the transmitter that was to disrupt the communications within the prison. Flipping open the enclosed laptop, she set up her workspace and hoped that the guard wouldn't take notice. Setting the security cameras to reroute to a feed that looped video from the week before, Rinoa smirked. It was easier to do than she thought it'd be. _And Watts said it couldn't be done_...._wait till I see_ him _again_....With a flip of the switch, it was done. Next she hit the phone lines, cutting all incoming and outgoing calls to a voice mail system that informed them the line was experiencing a temporary overload. A situation that was apparently common in the outback. She turned on the transmitter and hoped for the best. Its indicator on her laptop's display went green, and Rinoa breathed a sigh of relief. She ducked down, and opened her door as quietly as she could. Slipping out the half opened door, Rinoa skulked around the guard station to find the least obvious place to put the transmitter. Choosing the very back of the station, Rinoa pushed the device onto the side of the small building. Waiting to make sure the plastic adhesive worked before she returned to the car. She made it back just in time, the guard had just returned from his call 

The guard looked confused, "Um....what happened to the lady that was with you?"

Irvine nearly had a heart attack, obviously their orders had been accepted but it'd be a moot point if Rinoa's absence raised the alarms. He tried to think up a plausible excuse, but none came to mind. Going white and sweaty for the first time in his whole life, Irvine Kinneas did not have an expert lie on hand. It was then that Rinoa popped up with a smile, light twinkling in her eyes.

"Sorry, shoe laces untied...." she said, not hiding her amusement one bit. 

The guard gave her an odd look before going on to give instructions for where to park and who to talk to. She let Irvine handle all that, preferring to take a moment to catch her breath. She closed her eyes and waited for their next move. 

On the outside, she had taken what Irvine had said last night to heart. There was still a part of her that doubted, some odd feeling nestled deeply within that worried about what was to come. She didn't think it'd be that easy for the others to forgive her. Irvine hadn't seen the look on Quistis's face, it was a look that plainly blamed Rinoa for what happened. Rinoa made a guess that Quistis had saved her because it was her job and not her steadfast devotion as a friend. She'd know the woman all of a micro-second. In that time, Rinoa had more than her share of evidence that Quistis held no love for her. Perhaps Quistis had tolerated her, but Rinoa never felt accepted. Except for that night before the parade, it had felt like she'd know them for years. They were her long lost sisters she'd always prayed for, but never got. Rinoa frowned, this wasn't the first time she had felt like this. 

She remembered times with her distant relatives, especially the long summer she spent with her Aunt Abby and her children. There were four of them, and while her mother was still fighting for her life, Rinoa found herself in their company. Pua, was the eldest and spent most of her time acting vastly older than she actually was. Moani and Apona, fraternal twins who were the closest to Rinoa's age and with which she spent most of her time making trouble. The last was little Ravi, the baby of the family and the favorite, the only boy in a gaggle of girls. It had been a nice enough time, Abby and her family lived on a small the small island of Kanahena, in the small seaside village of Hana. And unlike the rest of the island chain that made up Balamb, Kanahena was blissfully devoid of tourists. Retaining much of its native home town charm. In her time of sorrow, it had been heaven and she'd almost forgotten about it. _And they say GF's steal your memories, I think not_.....

On her closed lids she played back memories of that summer and the small comfort it had brought. Running wild on the beach, yelling and giggling like she hadn't a care in the world. Forgetting that her mother hovered near death in that cold mansion in Deling. She cried when he father had come to get her for the funeral. Not wanting to leave, because if she stayed here maybe her Mom was still alive. She could pretend, couldn't she? 

It seemed that fate got a kick out of stealing her joy and squashing it under her boot. That was the last time she felt really happy without faking it. Laughing without pretending to laugh. Being so free that if you closed your eyes and wished hard enough you could fly. That was how that night with Quistis and Selphie had felt, and she swore she could feel those broken wings mend. Like she was back with her Aunt Abby and all her cousins, like she was home. 

A deeply amused voice broke into her thoughts, "There's nothing to be nervous about...."

"I know...." Rinoa said as she opened her eyes. 

Looking up at the solid wall of that prison, she really believed it for the first time. Everything was going to be alright, and there was nothing to be afraid of. She had gotten her wings back, and by god she'd fly. 


	24. Ascension

Irvine looked over at Rinoa, pleased to see that she looked happier. Something had clicked within the last few moments, as if an internal light had been turned on and suddenly she was the Rinoa he'd first met a little over a month ago. It lifted the heavy weight that had been burdening his own heart of late. 

"Remember to remove your junctions before you enter...."

"....Yes, I know, because of the magic field." She said it with a genuine smile, her dark eyes twinkling with that familiar brilliance. "Geesh, you're a nag."

"Or not. Then I can ravish you when you pass out from suppression sickness." Irvine grinned, closing his eyes in expectation of the punch that soon followed, "Did anyone ever tell you, you hit like a girl?" Another punch hit, this time much harder. He rubbed his arm, still grinning from ear to ear, "I never knew how much you loved me...till this moment. Hit me again, so I know it's not a dream..."

Rinoa glared playfully at him, "Keep it up chuckles, and I'll not only punch you but aim a nice blast of fire up your ass."

"AW! You _DO_ love me!!"

Rinoa laughed, rolling her eyes with mock-exasperation. She'd gotten used Irvine's teasing and had only now come to enjoy the back and forth banter they had shared this entire time, "Yes, you've learned my terrible secret.....Now shut up and quit joking....we're supposed to be professionals." 

They approached the main employee entrance, and Rinoa looked down at her paperwork. She had a new name she'd have to temporarily memorize, if only to get them in and out of this place as soon as possible. Any slip ups, and their mission would be far more difficult. Forgetting wasn't an option. She and Irvine quickly exchanged names, neither wanted to bumble the rescue because one of them didn't know their own partner's name. Rinoa fumbled with her ID, quickly clipping it to her jacket as they approached the door. The final touch was a badge, encased in a medium sized leather wallet. Rinoa flipped it over, examining the bright gold surface with interest. 

"Check it out. We got badges....MAN! We coulda pulled someone over with these..." Rinoa said excitedly. 

Irvine smiled and looked at his own badge. It was as if she'd read his mind, "Ah, yes...but the real question is. Who's gonna be good cop and who's gonna be bad cop?" 

"I get to be good cop! I call dibs!"

"No way you're gonna be good cop. You don't have the charm or..." Before he could finish a sentence, she'd already hit him, "Only bad cop would hit an innocent cowboy just trying to make a point." he said, looking at her with big puppy eyes. 

"Fine, you get to be good cop." Rinoa giggled, hitting him on the arm again, "Ya poozer."

"Hey, quit joking, we're professionals....remember?"

She thought of sticking her tongue out at him, but realized that he was correct. They were too close to the door to continue joshing each other. They stood in front of the door and inserted their keycards, waiting for authorization to enter. The reader beeped and expelled the keycard, followed by a loud click as the door locks disengaged. Just to be sure, they waited for the green light above the door to illuminate and then they entered. Neither knew entirely what to expect. Once inside, the guards seemed almost disinterested in the visitors that had just entered. Rinoa half expected them to rush at the door to strip-search them. At least, that's the kind of security she thought existed in prisons. She couldn't have been more wrong. Only one guard took any interest in them. He was their escort, and he blandly explained the prison rules. Half-heartedly patting them down all the while. 

Once that was done, he issued them both prison identification cards, with the word guest printed in large neat letters on the front. Continuing his lecture on prison etiquette, he bade them to follow up a series of seemingly endless corridors and stairs. If she hadn't been walking, Rinoa would have surely fallen asleep. As it was, she merely drowned out his voice, silently singing to herself as she counted stairs. Eventually, he led them to a locked door that lead to another smaller guard station. Once again they were patted down, and this time told to surrender their weapons. Irvine grudgingly acquiesced, handing over his beloved rifle with trepidation. Rinoa giggled despite her own inner warnings not to, handing over her primary weapon.  

The guards, satisfied now, let them enter the warden's office. The inner office was a neat affair, simple and clean. On the right were a small bank of comfy looking chairs and a table with a pile of magazines spread across it. On the left was a large artificial ficus tree, its silk leaves glowed a pale shade of green as the afternoon sun streamed through barred windows. The walls themselves were paneled with real wood, slick looking oil paintings scattered across the small space allotted. It was cozy enough that you could almost forget you were in a prison... Almost. Rinoa looked down at the carpet and at the long shadows of the bars as they crawled across it. 

The secretary's kiosk stood right in the middle of this room, the entrance to the warden's office was behind her. She looked up from what she was doing, which seemed to be a whole lot of nothing. _Just doing enough work to look busy_, Rinoa thought, giving a little huff of annoyance. The secretary rolled her eyes, as if they'd interrupted her in the middle of doing something _really_ important. 

"Can I _help_ you?" She asked, not hiding her absolute distaste for their presence. 

Irvine put on the best smile he could manage, "Yes, we're here to see Warden Irons." 

The woman rolled her eyes again; she asked snottily, "Do you have an appointment?"

"Yes." he answered chipperly, "We're the agents from Operation Parade. I believe we were expected." 

Irvine flashed another overly pleasant smile and handed over their fake IDs. Sure, he could have been just as rude to her as she was to him. That just wasn't his style. He took great pleasure in being extra nice to rude people. A subtle form of revenge on his part, knowing that his amiability irritated them more. It worked, the secretary ruffled at the sheer niceness of his replies. She jabbed angrily at the buttons on her phone as she called into his office. On the phone her demeanor changed completely, from outright hostility to a cheerful kind of politeness as she told the warden of his visitors.  Hanging up the phone, she gave a nasty little smile as she told them to sit down and wait. 

Irvine smiled back, winking at her before approaching the small waiting area. Rinoa found it more difficult, her lips stretched into perhaps the fakest smile since she'd left her father's. She sat down next to Irvine, and began to flip through the pile of old magazines on the coffee table in front of them. 

The odd thing about waiting rooms is you never feel like it's all right to talk. Rinoa had always felt the world might somehow shatter if she talked too much within the confines of any given waiting room. It was the silence, the expectation of professional appearance that drove her to think this way. 

This was especially clear to her now, not only because of the dreadful secretary who eyed them even now, but that any slip-ups could case their cover to be blown. They had to pretend to be trained investigative officers that had come here to interrogate suspects. Irvine must have felt this too, as he'd fallen suddenly quiet. Rinoa missed their banter almost immediately and was seized with the sudden urge to punch Irvine, just to see what would happen. She resisted and sat down, giving her arms a little stretch to quiet her nervousness. 

Irvine had already found himself a copy of Verbatim, a popular children's magazine, to read. He immediately became absorbed in it. Rinoa shook her head and sighed, looking for anything to read. She settled on Crayone, an odd art magazine that she knew about but rarely read. A few minutes later she was reading about minimalist performance artist, Kikuko Inoue, Irvine interrupted her by jabbing her side. 

"What?"

"Do you have a pen? I wanna do the crossword...." 

Rinoa stared at him for a moment, gap mouthed. She had an insult ready; before it could escape her lips, the doors to the warden's office opened. A man stepped out; Rinoa guessed it was the warden. He was around forty and rather overweight; his hair was dark with a very obvious dye job. Rinoa had imagined that the warden of a prison would look sterner, more professional, perhaps wearing a light gray-brushed silk business suit from some expensive designer. This man looked like any ten beat cops she'd met in the course of her life. Most of them were her father's friends from the war, or past students of his. They had jackets for their suits, but very rarely ever wore them. They preferred to walk around with their business shirts tucked loosely into their pants, sleeves rolled up, holsters and suspenders out for all to see. This was the very image of Warden Avery Irons. 

Irvine jumped from his chair, shook his hand while greeting him, "Mornin' Warden, Agent Daniel Pierson, at your service."

Rinoa was up next, smiling politely and trying to remember to carry herself with a professional air. She introduced herself,  "Agent Rene Summers. Nice to meet you, sir."

"Welcome, both of you. Please come in.," the warden said, still smiling as he ushered them in. 

Rinoa cringed at the decor in the warden's office. It was entirely filled with the heads of dead animals, and Rinoa could feel her skin crawling as they watched her with their glassy eyes. With a shudder, she sat down next to Irvine, in an overstuffed chair that was directly opposite Warden Iron's unnecessarily huge desk. The desk fairly screamed, "_I'm not impotent_."

"So...  Thank you so much for coming on such short notice. I understand you two were on assignment when we called. I apologize if we've inconvenienced you..." Irons said, trailing off as he looked at them, hands clasped over his desk. 

Irvine looked at Rinoa, smiled and nodded, and he answered, "No... it was no problem at all. The...uh...mission wasn't that important; easily cancelled."

The look on his face was of a man who had no idea what he was talking about. Rinoa nodded quickly. 

"Well...that's odd..." Irons looked down at his paperwork, riffled through it with disinterest. He stopped and gave them a dubious look, "You two were on the undercover team that was infiltrating Garden. I can't imagine that kind of thing would be all that easy to cancel. In fact, I had to pull a few strings to do so..." His eyes narrowed with suspicion. 

The man was challenging them, was eager to catch them up. Rinoa called his bluff, "Normally, it would have been quite a trial to cancel. We'd only just begun our preparations when you called. So it was really easier than you'd think." She paused, and gave him a smile that was a mixture of sweetness and malice, "May I ask you if we've given you any reason to distrust us, sir? We didn't come all this way to be treated like the common criminals you house here." She slid their orders--stamped with Caraway's official seal--across the desk at him. 

That was enough to shut down any further suspicion on his part. Irons began to blather, "No..no...I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, it's just...you know...dealing with the types we have here, it's only natural to be suspicious. I didn't mean to insult you.... it's just you look so young. It's been years since I was on the police force and you have to be at least 18 to join...."

"Yes, well...we're not with the police force officially. We're special ops, former students at Garden who were recruited for...our talents."

"You're from Garden?"

"_Formerly_ from Garden..." Rinoa corrected him,  "The military life didn't suit us, if you understand my meaning."

"Ah, double agents, good." Irons finally sounded satisfied, "Well, let's get down to business, shall we?" 

Irons carefully and deliberately passed three dossiers across the desk. They were files belonging to the very friends they were here to liberate. Inside each dossier small pictures were paper clipped to a small title sheet. Which bore the prisoners' number, locations and general information. Under each cover sheet there were stacks of typewritten pages. Flipping through them, Rinoa and Irvine both had to hold in their amusement: Besides all the general paperwork crap, were sizeable lists of what looked to be prison infractions from all three of them. 

Irons leaned forward in his chair, "This is what we've called you here for. These three are part of the group that tried to assassinate our Sorceress. We believe they are SeeDs from Balamb Garden."

Irvine smoothly interjected, "How do you figure they're from Garden and SeeDs no less? Any well-trained militia group could have organized such an operation. I don't see any direct evidence."

"Yes, well, it seems that the Sorceress's Knight, General Almasy, knows them from his days in Garden. This fact, while useful, does us little good. We need more direct evidence against SeeD; moreover, we need conclusive proof that it was they who initiated the attack on us. It will justify our plans to annihilate Garden and SeeD. You see, the Galbadian government has always been suspicious of Garden and its motives from the very beginning. The parade incident only illustrates this more clearly to us." Irons paused, "But I'm getting ahead of myself. It's imperative that we have evidence against SeeD.... concrete evidence which should convince the world of their ulterior motives. This means more than Garden taking the fall for the parade incident. This means finding out Garden's true purpose, the one they don't tell you in their brochures. The secret agenda it's said they give all SeeDs at graduation. We've already begun interrogation on one of the subjects, but we need expert guidance. This is why you've been called. Because you are from Garden, _formerly_, and you know their routines...You see, we've found that these SeeDs are quite resistant to most normal investigative techniques. We're hoping that you'd be able to give us the keys to the kingdom...if you will."

Irvine and Rinoa shared a wary look and turned back to Irons simultaneously. Rinoa had always guessed at the levels of mistrust within the military, but never did she think it ran so deep. Irons' statements bordered on the kind of paranoia only seen in those who believed in UFOs. Apparently the old man wasn't finished, as he babbled on about how dangerous Quistis, Zell and Selphie were. Rinoa was amused that, between them, twenty inmates had been sent to the infirmary, and at least ten prison guards had been taken out by them. In the middle of his rambling diatribe, Irons made an odd statement that made Rinoa stop and listen. 

"These three, however important, aren't your real concern...yet." 

Rinoa shook her head, "Wait, you said that they were the reason we're here. Warden, I'm afraid you've lost me...."

Warden Irons smiled like he was holding a very precious secret, " I'm afraid I can't say more than that. I'd like you to start immediately." He paused momentarily to hand them a small keycard with a blue stripe down one side, "This keycard will allow you to go up to level thirteen where our lead investigator is waiting. One of our elite guards will show you the way; of course...this prison can be kind of a maze sometimes. It's easy to get lost...Nice to have you aboard." 

Irons got up and escorted the two of them to the door, holding out his hand for a final shake. They shook his hand in turn, both expressing how good it was to be working here and for him. It was an honor. Rinoa felt dirty as she said the words and found it hard to resist the urge to puke all over his smug, piggy face. Turning on her heels, she fingered the blue and white keycard Irons had given her before stuffing it into her coat pocket. Rinoa and Irvine shared another look outside Irons' office, ignoring the glares of the secretary. Neither of them could talk, at least, they couldn't talk about what they really wanted to. What awaited them on level thirteen? Rinoa had some very unpleasant guesses. 

With calm urgency, they entered the small guard station at the exit to the administration wing and retrieved their weapons. On their way out, they were met by a short Galbadian solider. His bright red uniform indicating that he was an officer, though not of very high rank. Brief introductions were given and once again they had to endure a lecture on prison etiquette.  Rinoa found it odd that a soldier was sent to escort them, rather than a normal prison guard. Though she couldn't blame Irons for not trusting them. Truthfully, he shouldn't. 

The young soldier continued to babble at them as they made their way into the prison proper. Rinoa had already forgotten his name and began to zone out. She made sure to nod and hum at the appropriate spots so that he'd never know she wasn't paying the least bit of attention to him. Irvine looked to be doing the same, albeit not as well as she. 

Her heels made a metallic clicking sound on the floor that had suddenly become fascinating. She stared down at her feet for a moment, stopping only inches from bumping into their escort. They walked past row after row of dank looking cells. This was a minimum-security prison, yet there were no barred cells. Large blast type doors kept prisoner from guard. Minimum security for the "political terrorist". She had heard rumors that this was where they sent dissidents. Rinoa began to count the cell doors, annoyed that she couldn't look into them properly, as they all had only one extremely tiny window. Rinoa shuddered.  

On the landing between floors three and four, a klaxon suddenly blared that pulled Rinoa from her daydreaming. She looked around confusedly, meeting Irvine's equally befuddled gaze. The soldier's radio crackled to life. 

"THE SEEDS HAVE ESCAPED!!"

A shot rang out and the young guard turned and slumped to the ground with a look of complete surprise. Rinoa visibly jumped, holding her hand to her heart as she scowled at Irvine, who was carelessly twirling his shotgun in one hand. 

"Was that really necessary?"

"Yes. 'Sides, they were sleep rounds. He'll live." He replied with a simple grin, before he tipped his hat and jogged off,  towards danger. "Comin' slow poke?"

Rinoa frowned, pausing for the briefest of moments before scooping up the guard's radio and running after Irvine. She met him on the landing on the fourth floor. Wordlessly they ran as fast as they could. Though for Rinoa it was a hard go, she wasn't trained like Irvine and the others to endure such lengthy bouts of sustained physical effort. She was by no means out of shape, just untrained. Breathing heavily, she kept her eyes trained on the hem of Irvine's coat. 

On the sixth floor chaos reigned, Rinoa and Irvine could clearly hear the sounds of battle from the fifth floor landing. Despite an aching knot in her side, Rinoa ran faster and caught up to Irvine, weapon at the ready. Irvine ran towards the fray with little regard for his own life, plunging into battle without thought. He shot indiscriminately, instinctively knowing that the crowd of soldiers in front of them had their friends pinned down.  Rinoa clicked a pinwheel into place, readying herself for battle. Something ricocheted off the metal of her weapon, bending the mechanism but not injuring her. She whirled around to face her attackers. A lone soldier, accompanied by two robotic assistants. Rinoa had seen the sleek blue and sliver robots, though she'd forgotten what they were called. A flurry of gunfire erupted and Rinoa dived for the ground, unable to defend herself without a weapon. Irvine pivoted quickly upon hearing the ruckus, training his gun on his new targets. Two shots and the guard were down. Reloading his gun with explosion rounds, he aimed for the robots, worried that it'd be harder to take them out. Their hard metallic shells protecting the delicate instruments within. 

Meanwhile, Rinoa surveyed her situation, patting herself to make sure everything was in place. Luckily the guard was a suck shot, nothing seemed out of place. Though her situation did not improve. She was weaponless, completely dependent on Irvine to win an impossible battle. A sudden wave of nausea hit her and Rinoa shook her head, annoyed. This was the second time that day she'd felt this way. The first time was when they entered the prison itself. She had been so sure she'd de-junctioned but apparently she had done something wrong because she nearly keeled over when she walked in. Grabbing onto Irvine for dear life. He'd teased her and the memory of it made her want to hit him again. Rinoa's eyes went suddenly wide with realization. If she was woozy now, could that mean that somehow the magic field was down? If it was, she had a chance. 

Still on the floor, she crawled over towards the larger battle behind them. Letting Irvine pick off the silver robots. All she could do now was hope to hell she was right. Rinoa raised herself up a little, getting purchase with her feet; she pushed off into a somersault. Tumbling forward and onto her feet, she held out her palms and concentrated. Within seconds a wall of fire erupted from her outstretched hands, the force of it sent her tittering back. Waving her arms, she fell to the floor--hard-- to watch in amazement at what she'd set loose. Her flame rippled through the crowd. Burning the soldiers to ash upon contact, and exploding their robotic assistants. Rinoa covered her eyes as more and more of the machines exploded. When all was said and done, there was very little left but flame and smoke. The prison's fire extinguishing equipment had failed partially and in only certain places could the soft pitter of falling water be heard. 

Rinoa dusted herself off, surveying the carnage she'd left behind. She was really unable to discern if she ought to be proud of herself or a bit afraid. Pondering this, she felt the gentle pressure of a hand on her shoulder, which momentarily startled her. She gave a tiny squeak, and then a grunt as she turned to view Irvine's smiling face. He looked over the sixth floor, not saying a word. He whistled and shook his head, ambling over to a trio of shadows who made their way laboriously through the billowing smoke. 

Reunions were had, words were said, hugs given and during the entire time Rinoa hung back. Her dark eyes peered hesitantly at her friends, undecided as whether or not it was okay to join them. She felt suddenly very alone. Realizing as she watched them that she didn't belong. Rinoa found herself unable to deal with the realities of the battle that had taken place in front of her. Killing in battle had always bothered her. It didn't seem to bother them at all. Besides that, she just felt...awkward. It seemed not even one noticed she wasn't there and why should they? She wasn't really one of them, was she? Before she could finish her next thought, the floor underneath her shifted. _Shit!_

She darted forward, her body still feeling a bit tired and winded. Shouting breathlessly, "This place is going into lock down. We have to get out of here now!"

All eyes were on her, looks of shock on everyone's face but Irvine's. Rinoa wondered if they were shocked because she was all right or if it was because she was here at all. She soon got her answer in the form of all five foot one of Selphie colliding into her at top speed. 

"RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNY!! YOU'RE OKAY!!" Selphie squealed, "When I didn't see you I got so worried!!" 

Rinoa laughed, banishing all thoughts of loneliness and alienation. Returning Selphie's megawatt hug with one of her own. After Selphie let go, Zell took his turn. Wrapping his arms around her and giving her a big bear hug, ending in him twirling her around a couple of times. 

Setting her down, he gave her a goofy grin, "Good to see you kid." 

Quistis was the last, strolling up to Rinoa quietly. The older woman's deep-sea eyes staring out with an unreadable gaze. This was the moment she dreaded most. She could still remember the sting of that gaze so many weeks ago. The very clear feeling that Quistis blamed her for Squall's death. It suddenly dawned on Rinoa that she was wearing Squall's jacket and she could feel herself stuttering out the beginnings of a blabbering explanation. Quistis hushed her with on hand, shaking her head with a small smile. For a moment, the two young women regarded each other. Were they rivals or friends? Rinoa had never really been sure. She knew she liked Quistis. But there was uncertainty where Quistis's feelings were concerned and this made Rinoa nervous. Quistis had loved Squall, perhaps more deeply than she, and certainly for much longer. It must have galled Quistis to see Rinoa wearing that jacket. It had to. Rinoa chewed on her lip nervously, anticipating a slap. The moment passed and Quistis leaned forward, giving Rinoa a warm hug. 

The blonde woman pulled away, a serene little smile on the corners of her mouth, "It's good to see you. Irvine mentioned you were a big help. Good work." 

"T-thanks." 

"I'm also told it was you who cast that fire spell. Seems we have to work on your control."

Rinoa blushed, "Yeah...Sorry."

Quistis shook her head, "It's all right. I'm impressed. Most first time users can barely summon a flicker. You must have some natural skill with magic. With a little refinement, you'd make a wonderful SeeD. So, how 'bout we get out of this dump?" 

They all nodded in agreement, talking for a few minutes about what their plan should be. It was decided that Irvine, Selphie and Quistis all go down to prepare their way out. Rinoa and Zell jogged up to the thirteenth floor to stop the prison's secondary defense systems.  Rinoa faced another long dark jog up a set of stairs. The only difference being that Zell was much, much faster than Irvine and Rinoa had quite a bit of trouble keeping up.  He'd stop every now and again, the little moomba that followed him around stopping with him. By the time they'd reached the thirteenth floor, Rinoa was tired and breathless. Jogging to a stop, she saw Zell hunched over the door tapping in different combinations to the door lock and muttering to himself. Holding her aching side, she leaned against the wall for a moment to catch her breath. She closed her eyes, suddenly feeling very tired. 

In the inner darkness of her mind, she let it wander. A myriad thoughts passing through her at the speed of light, it seemed quite unnatural but somehow she was at peace with it. _He's here_. A soft voice said, and it took a moment for Rinoa to realize it was Siren again.  _Who_? Rinoa asked, a note of confused curiosity entering her voice. Siren gave the impression of a knowing smile and Rinoa felt her fade from her mind as she receded into where ever GFs went when they weren't being used. She was brought back to her own world by an abrupt and violent tug on her right sleeve. It was the moomba, its large blue eyes staring up at her as if pleading for a treat. Rinoa smiled, smoothing the fur on its head. She looked over at Zell, who was still struggling with the door. Shaking her head and laughing, she looked back down at the moomba. 

"He's hopeless." The moomba made a little chirp, tugging again at her right sleeve several times. It stopped and looked up at her expectantly. Rinoa giggled, "You want a treat?" The moomba chirped louder this time, pulling on her sleeve hard enough to make her stumble forward. "What?" Another tug. Rinoa was annoyed now, turning out her pockets, "Look. See? I got nothing, George." 

The moomba was as annoyed and frustrated as she. Barking sharply this time and running down the corridor, past the stairs they'd just come up from. It turned when it didn't see Rinoa follow and jogged back. This time it ran behind her, pushing at her legs with its nose. The sheer force of the animal forced Rinoa into a walk. It stopped, ran down the corridor again and yelped. 

"You want me to follow?" 

It squeaked excitedly, running further down the hall. Sighing, Rinoa followed. Who was she to disobey a direct order from an animal? Angelo owned her, why not George? Leaving Zell behind to continue his fight with the door, Rinoa followed George. A short way down the hall, they came to a rather large iron door with an odd blue symbol on it. 

"This is what you want me to see? A door?" 

Rinoa sighed, a frown flickering across her face. _What in the world do they keep in there_? She thought, before giving a shrug and turning to leave. The moomba had quieted down, only to start back up, yipping and yelping wildly. It leapt at her, frantically jumping up and down, tugging at her right sleeve. Rinoa felt her ire rising, looking down past the hole where Squall had been hit she was about to berate the animal for wasting her time. Something drew her back to that hole. The loose pieces of a puzzle began to fit together. The animal had only tugged on the right sleeve. The sleeve that had been covered in Squall's blood. She'd washed it out, hadn't she? Something her father had told her once came floating back to her. _But moombas have an incredible sense of smell. They can smell blood long after the most visible traces have been washed away. They also have an incredible memory. All it takes is one sniff or taste from the victim's sample and they'll remember it. Some say for the rest of their lives_.  

Her eyes widened as she felt the air seep out of her lungs. With quiet urgency, she reached into her pocket and pulled out the keycard the warden had given her. Looking at it, the symbol on the keycard matched the door. Rinoa strode forward in a dreamlike state, her mind not fully comprehending what it was she was thinking. Only knowing that the answers lay behind that door. Her hands trembling, she swiped the keycard and the door opened with a nearly silent whoosh. 

She stepped inside the tiny room beyond and looked around. For the most part, it was bare. There were a few shelves facing her, on them was a variety of equipment, some medical tools and various other oddities.  On her left there was a rather tasteless display of whips and other devices, as well as a small door. Rinoa's lip curled in disgust. It was a torture room. She slowly turned around to see what was on the wall behind her. Everything went in slow motioned as she pivoted on the spot. Her jaw dropped, eyes widened and it felt as if someone had socked her square in the chest. On the wall, hooked up to some kind of torture device, was Squall. 

Her heart was beating a thousand miles a minute, and her lip trembled. Cautiously, she set one foot in front of the other until she was standing right in front of him. Her head tilted back slowly, taking in every inch of him. Rinoa's eyes glassed over. He looked awful. Hanging there limply, his head rested on his exposed chest, which was a crisscross of cuts and abrasions, still open and bleeding. They'd tortured him. Breathing hard, she came closer and lifted his chin up, so that she could see his face. She needed to see his face. Because she needed to know if this was real, or some haunted imagining from her nightmares. Long, delicate fingers gently cupped his chin, pushing it up ever so slowly. 

If there was a face to recognize, Rinoa could barely see it in the battered visage she now gazed upon. His eyes had been swollen shut, his lip cracked and bleeding, he barely looked human. Reaching up, she traced her finger down his scar, the only thing that marked him as the man she knew. Sadly, Rinoa stopped and pushed the matted hair from his face. Until this moment, she'd been able to keep her composure. This was too much. He was real and here, and god, he was alive. Broken, but alive. 

"Bastards." She whispered angrily, tears coursing down her cheeks.  

Rinoa stood there, her hand numbly running a hand through his hair when she heard a click coming from behind. It was the man who had done this; he'd come in through the door in the wall of whips. He studied the girl who stood between him and his subject and smiled cruelly. This was not the first time someone's friends had come on a rescue mission and found a beloved thusly. She'd make a sweet subject for his work. The boy hadn't cracked; perhaps this was his girl friend. 

The piggy little torturer wondered how long it'd take her to squeal once he bit into her. The boy'd crack, he knew that. She was a pretty little thing. He pulled his handgun from its holster, clicking back the hammer and holding it to the girl's head. Licking his lips, he reached out his other hand to touch her hair. It looked so soft and inky black. His hand suddenly stopped in mid movement. The torturer's eyes widened in confusion, realizing that nothing worked. He was paralyzed somehow. 

No sooner had he come to that realization, then he saw a slight wind ruffle the girl's hair. Slowly, her feet began to lift off the floor; until nothing but the very tips of her boots touched it. All around her, a nowhere wind flickered at her clothes, her hair. She leisurely turned around in mid-air, her hair lapping across her face in long tendrils. Her eyes had gone completely white and her normally expressive face had lost all emotion. She drifted towards the now paralyzed torturer, stopping only inches from him. Rinoa cocked her head, letting a dangerously playful smile grace her face. She lifted up one graceful arm, placing her right hand directly on his heart. The torturer's fear was mounting, as he looked at the unnatural siren floating serenely in front of him. She leaned in close, as if to tell him a secret. 

Her breath brushing his cheek, she spoke softly, "Ut ille patitur, sic tu ipsa pateris." *

With those words a black and red explosion of light and energy erupted from her right hand. It swallowed the man and he screamed as every single injury he'd inflicted on Squall was inflicted upon him, all at once. Another surge of black and red light engulfed him, and he was thrown backwards, his body thumping against the whip wall and landing ungracefully on the floor. There he stayed, writhing and convulsing until finally his body gave out. 

Rinoa sank to the floor, her feet firmly touching ground again. The wind swirling around her died down as her eyes returned to their normal color. She wavered in tired agony, all her strength sapped. She was aware that she was going to faint again and before she could think to do anything, she collapsed. ****

*English--As he suffers, you suffer. 


	25. When it Rains it Snows

The butt of Squall's gunblade cracked against his skull and sent Seifer reeling back in agony. Sight blurred by the blinding light of a thousand blinking stars, he felt as if he was floating and was vaguely aware that he might fall down. Cold metal greeted him as he landed on the floor of the float. His mind was filled with a deep gray fog, clouding all rational thought and threatening to drag him into unconsciousness. He fought to stay awake, focusing on the pain he felt to keep his mind rooted in the here and now. A rivulet of blood trickled down his forehead, and with great effort he reached a hand up to wipe it away. Seifer winced and drew back his hand, which was covered in his own blood. Squall had dealt him quite a blow. He'd have to pay him back in kind. A breathless chuckle came from his prone form, causing a small but agonizing wave of pain to ripple through him. His face crumpled in on itself and he gritted his teeth until it passed. Seifer groaned tiredly, rolling on his back with a hand to his brow. He had to get up, he was wasting precious time.

It occurred to him that Squall hadn't gone in for the kill. He was lying here, completely incapacitated. Where was his rival? An alarm rang in his head. Squall might be going after his sorceress again, he had to get up. Yet his body would still not respond. Frustrated, he grunted and punched the floor with his balled fist. The strange muted sounds of the world came back, and he could here absolute chaos was reigning. With a roar, Seifer forced himself up, ignoring the mind numbing pain in his temple. His pain didn't matter, he had to make sure his sorceress was alright. Stumbling to his feet, he looked around blearily. He turned to face her, eyes still thick and foggy from his head injury. Edea regarded him and her lip curled into a smirk. She stood with her arm outstretched, turning her gaze from him to the end of the float. The woman wavered on her feet a little and Seifer realized that she must have defended herself with her own magic. He felt a sudden pang of guilt for not being there for her. She relied on him, he was her knight. He had been foolish to underestimate Leonhart. Something he would not do again. The sorceress sighed, lightly sitting down on her throne to rest. He made as if to go to her, but she shook her head. Reptilian eyes indicating that he should go to the back of the float. _I have something to show you._ She whispered to him telepathically.

Still holding his head, Seifer acquiesced and staggered towards the end of the float. He could hear sobbing, it was quite soft but as he came closer he could hear it more clearly. It was a familiar sound, one that he'd been the cause of far too often.

Rinoa had always been his moral compass. That's what drew him to her, she always seemed to know the right course of action at any given time. His entire life he'd always felt directionless, but once he met her, he felt as if his life gained purpose. She knew the road and she would lead him across it. He managed to screw things up from time to time. Doing or saying stupid things that made her angry, or worse sad. Nothing in the world was worse than the sound of her crying. When she cried it sounded like her whole world was ending, and the protective streak in Seifer disliked seeing her in such pain.

So it was with great regret when he broke up with her. Though he felt that word was too strong. Really, he just wanted to take a break. They were moving far too fast, in his opinion. There were too many problems and unresolved differences in their relationship. If they were to have gone on, they'd have to grow up a little, find ways of solving the many arguments they had between them.

He'd planned a little talk, which didn't go well at all. Rinoa got angry, and perhaps with reason. Seifer admittedly was rather bad when it came to explaining himself. His foot was permanently in his mouth when it came to her. Still, he felt she understood and when he left, he'd hoped they'd stay friends. In fact, he'd hoped that after a period of a couple of months, perhaps they could give it another go. He'd be a SeeD by then, with power and respect. Everything was to be perfect. But it wasn't. Those months passed and then she met Squall at the graduation dance, instead of him. It seemed that his career at Garden was speckled with such occurrences.

Peering over the edge, he could see Rinoa's slight form trembling as she wept. Cradled in her lap was Squall's limp body, her slender arms embracing him. She sobbed as he breathed his last and Seifer could feel his blood as it turned cold. She wept for Squall. For Squall. Seifer saw red, his fists clenched and unclenched in righteous fury.

Squall, everyone loved Squall. The little bastard. He was always better, always stealing his thunder. From the minute the little pouf showed up, he'd been a thorn in Seifer's side.

Before, Seifer had been the golden boy, despite his many disciplinary problems. From day one, Seifer had problems with authority. It was because Garden insisted on a system where if you were older, respect was supposed to be given. This was a dogma that Seifer didn't believe in. If you wanted his respect, you had to earn it and being older than him was not the way to do it.

Seifer was the bad boy, but the bad boy who got excellent grades, the bad boy who could handle a gunblade. He was good at what he did. Seifer had passion, a trait that Headmaster Cid himself applauded him for. Of course, he wished that Seifer could control it more, but one cannot tell the wind where to gust. Then came Squall. He got more than just excellent grades, he was nearly perfect. He was so intelligent, that the administration ended up bumping him up one grade. The lessons for his age group weren't challenging enough. This alone made Seifer take an almost instant dislike to him. Of course, it wasn't just the boy's superior intelligence that furthered his hate.

Where Seifer was belligerent, Squall was impassive. This instantly meant that more attention was paid to Squall, as everyone wanted to pull him from his shell. Whereas, they just wanted Seifer to shut up. Especially Quistis, who at one time doted on Seifer but quickly turned her attention to Squall.

And as if to add insult to injury, Squall chose the gunblade as his primary weapon, and thus became the darling of the entire class. The only thing that made it bearable, was despite Squall's superior skill with the blade, he lacked the passion to wield it. Seifer had always had the upper hand because of this. Squall's blows were precise, but without emotion to guide them, there was no power. Seifer was less skilled, but ultimately he won more often because he put all of his emotions into the fight. He used them as fuel, and his blows while uncoordinated struck harder and faster for it.

It was strange that he hated Squall, yet looked forward to sparring with him. Their matches had often ended in stalemates. A situation that Seifer was unused to. He'd always been the best. Now it seemed that Squall might be better, in the end he was just as good. Which had annoyed Seifer, because he never got _any_ better. And if Squall didn't improve, neither did he. Squall took no joy in battle, and so Seifer began to get frustrated. Purposefully antagonizing Squall, trying desperately mold him into a worthy rival. Not just some average milk sop. The boy never improved in that regard, rarely showing flashes of any kind of emotion on the battlefield or anywhere else for that matter.

Until this last fight. Squall had passion now, stolen passion. Rinoa was his passion. Seifer saw the look in his eye when she jumped up on the float. The flicker of fire in those cold depths, the way he pulled them forward in a fury Seifer had never seen. It angered and frightened him, and at that moment he came to a sudden realization. Seifer began to wonder if he was on the right side, was first amongst these. Looking down on the corpse of his rival, a sight he should revel in yet it gave him no joy.

The second realization was, that in his own way he respected Squall. He could never like him, but Squall was the only person in his whole life to ever challenge him. Now that was gone. A shadow of regret passed his face before it was replaced by sudden nausea. Seifer came back to the world, mindful of the pounding pain of his head that had renewed its assault on his thoughts. He wavered for a moment, before the black of unconsciousness claimed him.

Seifer was pulled from the darkness in one violent, pain filled rush. He'd been unconscious for an hour, and in that time had been taken to the hospital. In shock and comatose, the emergency room doctors had begun treatment with minimal anesthetics. It was this that brought him so sudden wakefulness. Seifer howled in rage, nearly clocking the surprised resident who'd been suturing the gash in his head. His face pinched, Seifer glared at the intern. The anger in his blue-green eyes clearly evident, softening somewhat as he noted the proper amount of fear had been instilled.

"Well?" he snapped impatiently, "Finish it..."

The little resident blinked in bewilderment, before timidly beginning her ministrations again. As she guided the stitches in and out of his flesh, he couldn't help but grimace in pain. Gritting his teeth, he made no sound. Noting instead that he wasn't in a regular emergency room bed. He seemed to have a room to himself, and he couldn't help but smile a little. It was good to be a Sorceress's Knight. Edea was undoubtedly responsible for this and once again, he couldn't be more grateful for her kindness. Though he feared what reprisals she had in store for him for his failure at the parade. Her punishment for disobedience was cruel, and he hardly liked to think of it. A few times he'd been foolish enough to question her, and she had made him regret it. She had a particular knack for finding his most painful memories. And once she found them, she held him there, to experience them again and again in mind numbing agony. It was the kind of hell one would never want to experience more than once, akin to having your mind raped. And it had already happened to Seifer twice. He was not looking forward to his next meeting with Edea, not looking forward to it at all.

These thoughts had been put on hold as events outside his room diverted his interest. He could hear the sounds of a scuffle in the hallway and being something of a rubbernecking fiend, he was curious as to what the ruckus was. Almost thinking of throwing off the resident to see what was going on. Shrugging, he decided better of it. He was tired and the girl was almost finished, best to get it over with in one go. The sounds of struggle became louder, until they were right in front of his door.

"WAIT! YOU CAN'T GO IN THERE! IT'S RESTRICTED! THAT'S GENERAL ALMASY'S PRIVATE ROOM YOU CAN'T JUST....HEY!"

A shove could be heard, and a voice shouted back throatily, "MOVE!"

Seifer smiled, he recognized the tone and timber of that voice. Clasping his arms behind his neck, he waited. The nurse squeaked back in protest. A thump was heard shortly thereafter. Fujin and Raijin burst into the room, large grins on their faces when they saw their friend. Seifer peered behind them at the now unconscious nurse and gave them a satisfied smirk. There were no loud greetings, no hugs exchanged, merely a vast rainbow of non-verbal communication.

The disciplinary committee had never been known for having deep wells of emotion. They never wore their hearts on their sleeves, but there was always an unspoken respect for one another. They had been brought together because they shared similar goals and ideals. Amongst them was never showing weakness. Over wrought displays of affection were for the timid who feared death and loss, it was behavior that was unfitting for warriors. Better to regard each other with quiet dignity and respect. Yet Seifer had to say he was glad to see his friends. They represented familiarity and he found that it was something he'd longed for without even knowing it.

Fujin was the first to approach him, daring to break the silence, "SEIFER, OKAY?"

She wore a look of deep concern, her one ruby eye flickering with wetness unspent. Fujin was worried for Seifer, quite worried. Raijin had always been rather thick and so it'd been easy for her to convince him to help look for Seifer. What he didn't realize was what trouble their leader might have gotten himself into. Sure, Fujin disliked Garden's policies, but she was unsure turning against them was the right move. She had hoped to talk sense in her leader, but once there, she had lost the words. Cursing herself for not writing them down.

It was a little known fact that Fujin was almost completely deaf in both ears. She wasn't completely without hearing, however, she could hear very loud sounds and some mid-range sounds--though they were quite fuzzy and hard to catch. So she relied on lip reading to catch the words she might miss. Because of this defect she'd found it hard to speak normally. Her voice in normal speech was feeble and unable to form words properly. When she was younger, she'd been teased mercilessly. To try and remedy this she took to speaking only a few words at a time, spending hours learning how to pronounce selected bits of vocabulary perfectly--albeit rather loudly. She had still been teased for her monosyllabic speech pattern, but it was better than letting others on to her disability.

The only people who knew were Raijin, because he was her older brother, and Seifer, who'd been the only student at Garden who had ever been kind to her--of course, Doctor Kadowaki knew but Fujin had never given a damn what the doctor thought. She'd never expected anyone to treat her differently because she had been born with a disability. Seifer had respected her for her fighting prowess, for her fearlessness, and never ridiculed her odd way of speaking. For this, she was absolutely loyal to him. She'd follow him to the end of the earth.

"Fuj? You okay?" Seifer queried, giving her a curious glance as she hadn't answered his last two questions.

"FINE. YOU?" Fujin shook her head, embarrassed he caught her daydreaming.

"Yeah, great. Except for the gaping wound in my head."

"Looks bad." Raijin piped up, "Where'd ya get it?"

"Squall. Clocked me with the butt of his gunblade."

"Squall?" Fujin asked, her voice quieting.

She had heard many odd rumors over the last few weeks. That Seifer had changed sides was one of the oddest and this new tidbit of information disturbed her. Squall had long been Seifer's rival, or perhaps it was the other way around. Fujin could never really keep it straight. The only thing she did know was that she hadn't cared much for Squall. Though she respected him for his ability to control his emotions, a trait they shared, she couldn't help but hate his inability to think for himself. Squall was a rule monger and a kiss ass, he played Garden's game without question. He took no pride in the warrior's code and what beauty could be glimpsed in his fighting form was dispelled by his own dispassion. It was an insult to those who took bushido seriously.

Seifer had felt the same way and his path through Garden had been peppered with skirmishes with Squall. That he had a wound from the boy was no surprise. However, the fact that he had a wound, here and now, was. Squall was a SeeD now and had been assigned to some secret mission here in Deling. So how in the seven hells had the two warriors crossed paths and had enough time to get into a serious scrape?

Her only answer was that the rumors were true. Seifer had switched sides. He was no longer with Garden and had joined the Sorceress. Fujin felt like aiming one of her pinwheels at her own head, how could she be so stupid? The signs were so obvious. They'd called him General Almasy. _General_. And it had been one of his dreams to be like the knights of old. Finding a fair sorceress to protect, holding to the old codes of honor and duty. Add to that his pending expulsion...and you got a recipe for completely lunacy.

Fujin fidgeted, unable to decide how to approach Seifer on the subject. Simultaneously she debated on how to communicate all that she needed to. Speaking was out of the question, as her vocabulary in that area was decidedly lacking. Raijin couldn't be trusted to translate all that she said, even if written down. She'd have to engage in an activity she frowned on. THIL-_Trabia Hand Indicative Language_. It was a system that had been created in Trabia for deaf students to communicate by using a combination of hand gestures and body language.

To use it was an admittance of her disability and in her eyes, submitting to weakness. Both Seifer and Raijin had taken the time to learn it, hoping to encourage Fujin to utilize it more. They both were of the opinion that she tried too hard to hide her disability, and had tried on many occasions to convince her that being deaf wasn't something to be ashamed of.

They didn't have to live in her shoes. Neither of them knew what it was like to live in a world full of sound that you couldn't hear. She was cut off from an important, dare she say, essential, aspect of the world. That didn't mean she wanted to be pitied, she didn't want to be view as handicapped nor did she relish the thought of all the ridicule she'd have to endure. It was bad enough with the speech impediment. However, at this one moment clarity was more important than pride.

Tugging on Seifer's arm to get his attention, she began. Her fingers flickering gracefully as she formed individual words, her mouth moving mutely as she signed, "Seifer, why were you and Squall fighting?"

He signed back, carefully, "He got in the way."

"In the way of what?" she paused, waiting for him to reply but he didn't. He only stared at her with faraway eyes. Fujin made a strangled grunt and she signed furiously, "Damn it, Seifer! What's going on? We've heard rumors you're with the Sorceress. That you've turned your back on Garden." another pause, again he said nothing, "Tell me. We have a right to know. Have you joined with the Sorceress?"

"Yes."

Disbelief flooded her, and once more her hands flickered out, more rapidly than before, "Are you crazy?! The woman's dangerous! I've been checking up on her...do you have any idea what she's planning? She's going to attack Garden, not one...but all of them and once they're gone, she's heading for Esthar. It's the sorceress war all over again. You're still Garden for God's sake, even if...."

Slowly, he signed back, his face cold and emotionless. Seifer had become a distant mirror of his rival, his expression so much like Squall in manner and appearance, it frightened Fujin, "I'm not from Garden nor have I ever been."

"What... do you mean by that?"

"Squall's dead. The Sorceress killed him."

"How do you know that?"

"I was there, by her side. I watched him die."

Fujin licked her lips before replying, her mind reeling. Was this the man she'd known for the last ten years? "Why? Why didn't you do anything?! Squall...he was one of us. You just stood there and let her kill him?! What the hell is wrong with you? Seifer, you have to get away from her...you have to..."

He cut her off, his hands cutting the air aggressively as he signed, his face twisted with anger, "Nothing's wrong with me. Squall got what he deserved. He came there to assassinate her, she simply killed him before he got the chance. And I won't leave her. I'm her Knight and I've sworn to give my life to protect her."

"Why? WHY WOULD YOU DO SUCH A THING? Don't you realize she's just using you. This is no benevolent sorceress from some fairytale. She intends to repeat history. To follow in Adel's bloody footsteps. Whatever she's promised you, it's not enough for you to damn your own soul."

"She's promised me nothing."

"Bullshit. Don't play make believe. You can't lie to me. She's promised you _something_. The Seifer I know wouldn't follow someone so blindly." Fujin's brow knit tightly as she signed, individual signs flipping by so fast it was quite hard for Seifer to follow, "You aren't doing this for some noble ideal, you're doing it because she offered you power in exchange for your obedience. I know that Garden's cluster fucked you, but that doesn't mean you should throw away your life. Come back, it's not too late. Cid is still willing to..."

"Fuck you and fuck Cid. My place is by her side."

"Seifer, listen to Fujin, ya know. She's right...the Sorceress is crazy...she'll..."

"Oh, the moron speaks. Please, _illuminate_ me with your pathetic attempts at thought. What the hell can Garden offer me? Nothing. That's what. What can it offer any of us? It's a waste of fucking time..."

Fujin signed back in open rejection, "Garden offers a future. This Witch offers nothing but death for millions of innocents."

Seifer snorted, his movements becoming deliberately slow, something he only did when he wanted to be particularly cruel, "Garden offers _you_ a future? What kind of future would that be, Fuj? Do you honestly think Garden would accept either of you into its folds? Do you think they'll let Raijin make SeeD? Do you think they'll let _you_ make SeeD? It'll be a cold day in hell before that happens, you and I both know it."

"Shut. UP." She signed.

Seifer grinned, not relenting, "I bet they wouldn't even grant you an instructorship."

"Shut UP!!"

"_Maybe_, you can work in the cafeteria, slogging hotdogs to all the NORMAL students...you know, who can hear."

"SHUT UP!"

"Really, Fuj. It's only the truth. Who'd want a deaf, cycloptic, near mute for an instructor? You can barely speak for fuck's sake. Garden will NEVER hire you. You are a useless pile of carbon and water. If you were a puppy, I'd stick you in a sack and drown you." Seifer gave her a cruel smile as he stopped signing and brought a hand to his mouth so that she was unable to see what he said next.

Fujin trembled, hot tears stinging her single eye. She had no way of knowing what he had actually said, but she could make several educated guesses. Being an albino, her hair was a natural white as was her skin, her eye a bright crimson, add to that her physical disability. There was only one thing he could say that would really hurt her. Freak, he'd called her a freak or some variation thereof. It was a base insult but it still stung, as the moniker had haunted her since she was very small.

Seifer's eyes danced with amusement as he watched the pain his insult wrought. It was always fun to watch him do this to other people but he had never inflicted it on one of his own. Somehow Fujin kept it under control, she would not show her weakness, especially in front of him. She closed her eye tightly and clenching her fists at her sides, she looked down because if she had to look at him, she'd loose it. An uncomfortable silence filled the room for a time. After a moment of pensive thought, Seifer broke the silence.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly, moving over to Fujin, he lifted her head up so that she could see his face, "Fuj...I'm said I'm sorry. I've been stressed out. I-I can't go back. I've gone too far, but it's not too late for you two. Go back to Garden."

"NO."

"Fuj, don't be stubborn. I'll be fine. This is my dream, not yours."

Fujin looked at him, one crimson eye glistening with determination. She spoke, haltingly, "I....want...to s-stay. Help."

"Me too." Raijin piped up, "There ain't no place for me at Garden, ya know. I'd rather follow you anyway."

Seifer smiled broadly, a relieved laugh left his lips. It felt like a weight had been lifted, even if it was only briefly. All these lonely weeks, there had been little in the way of normalcy. Everything had seemed so surreal, as if he was living some other person's life. When his friends had entered, talking of Garden and the future, it had angered him. There was a deep pit in his soul, he felt it and it was widening. The noble parts of him were fading away, and they had reminded him of their loss. Fujin and Raijin were in his mind, part of another life. One where he didn't have such dark ambition, where the sky was blue and cloudless. In a sense, he understood that he was falling into darkness and was unable to stop it. He was like a babe, drowning in the ocean.

Having his friends near brought back the feeling that his life was his own, that it belonged to him and him alone. It didn't, not anymore, but to feel that freedom -- it had been nice.

Seifer had done his research on being a sorceress's knight and he understood the demanding nature of the job. He had never expected it to dominate so much of his time and energy, nor did he expect it to consume his soul as it had. Loosing himself in the wash of power the Sorceress gave him.

Fujin gazed at Seifer, watching him as his face flickered in thought. She had always been a keen observer of the human face and she had the unnerving ability to read someone by the subtlest of their expressions. She would stay by his side, even though she could see him slipping through her fingers. He was bent on pursuing this madman's dream that would ultimately end in his ruin. _So lost, so lost_. Fujin shook her head imperceptibly as pushed a flood of emotion from the surface. How do you save a drowning man without succumbing yourself?

Fujin wrestled with this thought, coming up with nothing. There was no way to save him, unless of course, she made a devil's deal. She'd have to betray him and ask Garden for help. That was unquestionably a bad idea and she refused to give up the only person who'd ever believed in her. She was his right hand girl, wasn't she? Fujin didn't feel it, and doubt nestled in her mind. She had to save him -- had to, though she didn't know when or even how, she would. Even if it meant her own downfall.

The doors burst open and a soldier stepped in, looking curiously at the still unconscious nurse before stepping over him and running up to Seifer.

"Sir, we have a...situation." The soldier said, looking over with suspicion at the General's two companions.

"Don't worry. They're alright. Old friends." Seifer paused, brow furrowed, "So, what is it?"

"Problem at the city morgue."

Seifer gave the guard a strange look, "Ah-hah. Can it wait?"

"No."

"Being in the morgue I think it could."

"Not really, sir. It's actually of an urgent nature."

"Yeah..._And_? Unless it's the zombie holocaust, I don't _care_. Let someone lower on the bean pole handle it. Piss off." Seifer said, a sarcastic edge to his voice.

The guard was not dissuaded and leaned in to whisper something to Seifer, who reacted with instantaneous attention. He grabbed the soldier by the collar and pulled him close.

"Are you sure?" The soldier nodded, and Seifer let him go with a dirty look, "Why the hell didn't you tell me in the first place?!" With a sigh, he rubbed his temples, "Before I go, I'd like you to arrange a special escort for my friends here. Show them to the palace, set them up in with a couple of guest suites. One of the really nice ones."

"Yes, sir." The guard saluted and ran off to carry out his order.

Seifer turned back to his friends with a tired smile, "No rest for the weary. We'll talk more later. Gotta go..."

"Seifer, what is it, ya know?" Raijin asked in an odd moment of lucidity.

"Leonhart's alive."

"HOW?" Fujin exclaimed.

"Who the fuck knows?! Well, I guess I will, eventually...but...."

"DETAILS. LATER" Fujin cut him off, kindly realizing the pressure her friend was already under.

"Right, later." Seifer nodded and with a wave, left his friends behind.

Seifer gingerly stepped around the fallen nurse to enter the hallway. He made his way to the hospital's front desk to take the phone call from the coroner's office. The conversation was short and sweet as he arranged for Leonhart to be transferred via airlift from the morgue to the desert prison's infirmary. He would meet the transport there by helicopter as Seifer was not in a mood to wait. There were answers that he needed and he'd never been a patient man.

His mind was clouded in an angry, red mist and no matter how hard he tried to clear it, it would not dissipate. This failure only angered him further because he realized that he'd need clarity if he wanted to obtain the answers he searched for. The ensuing investigation was already looking to be one of those meticulous things that he despised. His uncontrollable passion and over-emotionality would only serve to hamper things and he knew it. Seifer knew himself and in knowing himself, he was aware that he was not a stickler for detail. Never had the patience or dedicated calm for it.

That had always been Squall's arena. One of the few things Seifer had admired about the boy. Squall had unnervingly keen intelligence and a cool demeanor, no matter the situation. It gave him the advantage of being able to size up difficult situations like this without getting ruffled. _Perhaps Squall should be handling the investigation into his own death and resurrection._ Seifer couldn't help but chuckle at the irony in that thought as he stared pensively out the window.

Less than a quarter of an hour later the helicopter touched down, blades cutting the air in slow concentric rhythm before coming to a stop. Seifer stepped out onto the platform, gray trench coat rippling in the arid, desert wind. He scanned the vast horizon, the sun just peeking above the rock formations silhouetted in the distance. The sky had turned bright gold and orange in the morning light, and Seifer sighed in resignation. Running a hand through his hair, he smirked, putting everything he had into the lie. Radiating confidence that plainly wasn't there, it was all for show. But he supposed that was the point, wasn't it?

Seifer was immediately shown to the infirmary to speak with the doctor in charge. Dr. T.J. Eckleberg greeted the Sorceress's Knight with on the surface warmth but Seifer cold sense the nervousness behind his calm demeanor. He wondered if it was him the doctor was afraid of or the strangeness of Leonhart's death. Seifer decided it was probably both.

The doctor was a short man and looked to be young for someone in his position. There was a boyish air about him, so much so that he looked years younger than his twenty-nine years. Seifer thought that if he'd been faced with Dr. Eckleberg in a hospital setting that he'd ask for another doctor. Perhaps someone who'd already been through puberty. As the mousy little man hardly looked capable enough to change a light bulb but then again, appearances were often deceiving.

Shaking hands and offering greetings, the doctor showed him into his private office.

"So. Let's get down to business, Doc. What the hell happened?" Seifer began, slumping into his chair with his hands resting comfortably on his chest, trying his best to radiate casual cool.

"You don't waste time." The doctor commented, humorlessly.

"No. I don't. So...get on with it."

The doctor paused dramatically and then launched into his story. It had happened just after the coroner had set up his tape, as he had done for every autopsy he'd done for the last thirty years. Snapping on a pair of rubber gloves he'd begun the external examination, clip board in hand.

_"Male, Caucasian. Age, approximately seventeen or eighteen. Height, 5'8_..." The coroner's voice echoed into the tape recorder, and as he came to the subject's weight, the body on the table twitched.

This didn't phase the coroner in the least. Corpses often twitched like that as the nerves in the body fired off any excess energy that had been left after death. It was a common, if a bit creepy, occurrence. His examination continued without pause until the body twitched again, this time more violently. Seeming more like a seizure than a mere twitch. The arms and legs suddenly jerking to semi-life, its shoulders rising and falling with a dull clank on the stainless steel autopsy table. This stopped the pathologist cold and for a moment he stared, his heart hammering like a drum. With a sigh, he decided to go on, though in his years in the coroner's office, he'd never seen a body do something like that. He moved over to the corpse in an attempt to weigh it but before he could, it jumped to life again. This time more violent than the last. The arms flailed out, grabbing the sides of the table only to let them go moments later. The body convulsing on the table, its head pushing back onto the metal surface. Its eyes opened and closed, face twisted in mock agony. This was _not_ normal. Alarms went off in the pathologist's head and unconsciously he backed away, his eyes riveted to the writhing thing on his autopsy table.

The corpse continued to seize, its arms dangling over the side of the table as its back arched and in one violent rush, it threw itself forward. It, no, he sat bolt upright and with one long inhalation, he gasped for air. This sudden intake caused the newly revived young man to nearly choke on a series of rasping coughs before slumping back onto the table.

Quiet settled in the sterile room and the coroner did his best to still his frantically beating heart. With great caution, he moved over to the former corpse, wondering if he'd imagined the entire thing. He hadn't gotten much rest in the last few days and he thought logically that this might just be some sleep deprived hallucination. As he approached the boy he could plainly see the slight rise and fall of his chest. His hands trembled as he reached out and gently touched two fingers to the boy's neck. The skin was still cool but warmth was gradually returning and the sickly yellow tint of his skin subtly turned to pink. The strange glow of sudden life returning to his pale cheeks. If that wasn't enough, the steady pulse beneath the pathologist's fingertips could not be denied.

Seifer stared at Doctor Eckelberg before interrupting his narrative, "I find this tale of magic and mystery fascinating but skip to the god damned point. Why is he alive, who would or could do something like this and how?"

The doctor shook his head, his eyes glazed in professional confusion, "That's just it. We don't know exactly why he's alive. It's quite the conundrum actually." the doctor paused long enough to pull out several files and photos, which he laid out for Seifer to see. "But we have figured out how it was accomplished. Preliminary tests on blood and tissue samples all came back normal, with only one small irregularity. Further testing showed a high concentration of legerderin absorbed into the blood and tissue. The highest amounts found around the puncture wound in the shoulder region."

"Uh-huh. Okay, say that again and this time in a language humans speak."

The doctor gave him an annoyed glance, but continued as if he was talking to a simpleton, "Legerderin is a compound used in the manufacture of para-magic."

Seifer interrupted again, "Wait, you're telling me he was revived by magic? That's fucking bullshit. Life spells can't bring you back from the grave. They can bring you back from the brink, but once you're dead you're out of luck. Any first year cadet at Garden could tell you that."

"Yes, I was getting to that. As I was saying." The doctor interjected with an irritated cough, "Legerderin is the compound that makes up most para-magic. It's also used as a catalyst in Guardian Force fusion. The compound itself isn't _normally_ found in nature, it's synthetic--man made. Manufactured by the Odine corporation. However, the legerderin found in patient three fourteen's system was completely natural. The substructure of the compound was quite similar to the manufactured version but.."

"Natural? What the fuck? Seriously...What. The. Fuck? I want something concrete, doctor, and you're still giving me some line of bullshit fairy story. There is NO way any kind of magic, natural or no, would cause someone to rise from the dead. I saw Leonhart. He was fucking _dead_. He was a stiff. Dead as a doornail. He expired and went to meet his maker! Bereft of life, he passed on. He shuffled off his mortal coil, and ran down the curtain to join the bleedin' choir invisible!! He was one dead fucking parrot. AND now you tell me that someone stuck forty thousand volts in his ass and miracle of miracles, he lives? Bullshit. Pull another the other one, Eckelberg. I'm not biting."

"If you would allow me to explain, General." The doctor said, the condescension in his voice thick, "The synthetic version of legerderin was based entirely on the naturally occurring compound. However, there is only one source for natural legerderin."

"And that would be?"

"A sorceress, legerderin is a hormone found in the blood and tissue of a sorceress. It's what gives them their power, to be exact. At least, one of the few things we've found. So, this narrows down our field of who quite considerably." this was enough to catch Seifer's attention and keep him quiet, so much so that he sat and actually listened. Much to the doctor's relief, "I was inclined to believe it was our Sorceress, so we did more testing. Natural legerderin signatures are unique to the individual. We had to send the samples out to a source we have in Esthar. It was difficult, but they have the resources, over a thousand samples from various sorceresses throughout time are on file there. Edea was luckily listed with them. The sample came back negative. Our sorceress wasn't the one who did this. So that leaves us with a rather large question mark."

"Do we have any idea who it might be? A way to narrow it down? Perhaps those experts in Esthar can give us a name..."

"That's the thing. The sample was apparently quite rare, it belonged to a sect of sorceresses that are now extinct. Heraldic class was the term they used. The last of the line was said to have been wiped out in the conflict with Adel. So, the mystery deepens." The doctor stopped to look down at his documents before going on, "There is hope, however. Revivification was a specialty of heraldic sorceresses. However, the spells involved are complex. Requiring concentrated effort to cast, it's not something that could casually be done from afar. Whoever cast it would have had to have been close to the patient at the exact time of death in order for it to work."

"How close?"

"She'd have to be touching him. You said that you saw him, that you were sure he was dead. Was there anyone near him at the time?"

"No, there was no one." Seifer had to force his face to go slack, had to control the threat of a quaver in his voice.

"Strange." The doctor commented with a shrug of his shoulders, "Well, I suppose that's a mystery for you and the Deling City police to find out. Would you like to see him?"

"Yes."

The doctor led Seifer down a series of sterile hallways until they reached the infirmary proper. Squall had been given the only private room in the prison. It had been set up that way, as Seifer didn't want anyone to know that Leonhart was still alive. It was best that he stay dead, Garden needn't know of his rebirth, nor did they need to have hope that he might still be alive. Leonhart would soon be dead again anyway, after he was properly interrogated, of course. Seifer looked down at his rival, as he entered the room. Squall was a shadow of the young man he'd been. He looked positively sickly, his skin a ghostly white with dark circles underneath his closed lids. All manner of tubes and machines were hooked up to him as he slumbered, his head tilted to one side limply. Seifer noted the large gash on his right shoulder, it was for the most part healed, though the skin was still an angry pink. Undoubtedly that was where the sorceress had struck him and Seifer found himself amazed that the wound had healed over so quickly.

"How long?" Seifer asked the doctor.

"How long till what?"

"Till he's well enough to interrogate."

"Two weeks, more or less."

Seifer nodded, "Inform me the minute he's ready."

The doctor agreed and Seifer turned on his heel, leaving the room with purposeful strides. As he stormed down the hallway of D-district's infirmary, his coat trailing behind him, Seifer desperately tried to convince himself he was doing the right thing.

* * *

WOOT! Another chapter finished. And y'all thought I hated the discplinary commitee. Shame on you. I don't hate them. Squall does. Quistis does. I'm just writing what they feel, yo. Seriously, this was a fun chapter to write. Also, I'm sure y'all wanna kill me for denying you Squall for yet another chapter. I assure you, he will be back and soon. That is, once I've gotten over how to handle what I wanna do next chap. Anyways, stay frosty!

--Noa


	26. Sleeping is a Gateway Drug

Everything was warm, peaceful and good. He was done, finished with his life and the swirling mist around him formed a blanket of comfort that assured him that all was well. Things had been left in good hands and he had no more tasks to attend to. There was no body nor mind to anchor him, the burdensome weight of his human soul had been lifted. All that was left was the pure essence that made him who he was, undiluted by the pain wrought upon him by a mortal life. Content in his non-corporeality, he set adrift in a sea of contentment, relieved that his suffering was behind him. Though there was an occasional twinge of regret at something that he'd left undone. The mists had assured him that there was nothing that he had to do, no tasks to finish, but there was still a feeling, deep inside, that there was much he'd left behind. Things that were important to him. Things he hadn't said. Things that he'd never even experienced. It didn't matter now...did it?

_"You do not belong"_...a voice from the light spoke, it was feminine. Gentle, caressing his senses. It seemed as if it was not just one voice, but many. Like an entire choir of angels, singing only to him.

"No.You're wrong." he replied, no matter how gently she spoke or how she tried to convince him, he would not budge. "I want to stay."

He belonged here. He wanted so much to be finished. The voice waited him out and he could tell it was amused at his denial. This did not stop the binding of his soul as it was pushed back into his human shell. Denial would not stop his life from returning. The golden voice laughed lightly as he struggled to remain in the heavens.

"You don't belong. Go home."

The breath of life filled him and Squall Leonhart lived once more. The world he sought to abandon rushed back to him, as well as his memories. He was aware that he was tired and weak, and not much else. There was pain but only in the in-between times, when he was actually awake. Squall lay between waking and dreaming as his body recovered from his wounds. His consciousness was assaulted with dreams during this time but there were brief respites when he would awaken to bright light and muffled sound. For the most part, his mind was trapped within a world of deep darkness and haunting images.

He dreamed of blood and sorrow, of the last minutes of his life, he dreamed of Laguna--which seemed most out of place to him, dreamed of searching and what was to come, premonitions that would echo soundlessly within him long after he'd forgotten their meaning, but mostly, he dreamed about her. Squall's pride would not allow him to say her name but in his dreams, she was there. A spinning memory that played over and over again, like a film that skipped a spoke. Dark hair, dark eyes and an effervescent smile, his thoughts never strayed far from it. She waited for him, he knew she did. He had tried so hard to meet her but something always held him back. Despite never being able to reach her, he could feel that she was near. His tired mind always keeping its concentration locked on her pinprick of light. It was this dream that sustained him, kept him fighting to surface from the void. Her light that guided him to the distant shore as he swam towards it. Squall fought the current, no longer content to be dragged in its wake.

"Wake up."

The voice and the accompanying shove were unpleasant to the waking young man.

"WAKE UP!" the voice repeated, the harshness of its tone was achingly familiar, "Wake up. Mother FUCKER! Wake the fuck up!...son of a...get the god damned hose..."

Squall opened his eyes a crack at the last comment, his mind trying desperately to understand the meaning of the statement and why the other parts of his mind panicked at the concept. Soon, everything became clear as he was blasted by a blast of water. A cold, pulsating stream of water that beat at his skin and sent him sputtering against the wall of his cell. The water abruptly stopped and Squall braced himself on his cot as he coughed and wheezed, still in shock at being so rudely awakened. Bleary he opened his eyes to regard his surroundings, his tired mind focusing on the moving blobs of color in front of him. One of the blobs approached and promptly punched him, hard. Stars exploded in the back of his skull and Squall reeled. Through the buzzing in his ears and the pain in his head, he recognized the voice that addressed him at last.

"Seifer."

* * *

A/N--Sorry about the shortness of the chapter. The next chapters should be longer...or maybe not. I do have a guest writer coming in for the next few. I asked my hubbie, Scott, to write the torture chapters. Because I plainly suck at writing them...believe me, I know I suck. I have to warn y'all. They are pretty intense. I've read some of what he's written and it's...WHOA! Scary. But this is why I had him write them. He's very good with such scary turns of subject. (He has an RE2 script that's half done that's excellent, if allowed script formatted writing I'd poke him until he posted it.) Also, the format for the next few chapters is what I'd like to term experimental. Like an experimental film, only with less pretentious prattling. Aaaaaanyways. Welcome back, Squall!! He's likely to be quite fucked up by the end of all this. I've determined I made him too soft and henceforth, I shall rectify it. Until of course, Rinny melts his heart! YAY! Okay. I'm gonna go bye-bye. So much to write....sigh


	27. Midnight Somnac

_**NOTE FOR THE SENSITIVE READER!**_

This chapter of Angel Wings will include some pretty heavy torture scenes. We're not talking Resivoir Dogs here, but it is pretty graphic. So for your own sanity and mine...if you are sensitive to that which is gorey, violent, and graphically icky...please...wait a chapter or two. We'll all let you in on the secret. Squall's getting tortured. We'll tell you when it's okay to come back!

Enjoy!

Noa

* * *

_darkness__ again_

"_MOVE!__ GET OUT OF THE WAY!_"

_speeding__ bulletpictures flashing slow steady silent -- swirling colors_

_burning__ numbing_

_cliff__ ocean roses_

_drop_

_sudden__ sharp_

_crystalline__ shimmering penetration -- breath? no _

_drowning__? no tears, no rain, so tears?_

_black__ dark_

_silent_

_empty_

_noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo_

"_ --__ OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!_"

Darkness. Upright... He was standing -- no. Held. Restrained. Held up. Held, by what? By his arms. But what? His arms, but by what? By whom? Where? When? Fuckin' why not? Why?

He wasn't always -- he was... laying. Laid. Laid on a -- a who?

_dark__ again_

CRACK

* * *

Pinwheels of light behind his eyes. In front: nothing.

-- white. Hot burning white.

"Good morning."

Him. him the voice, him the him.

CRACK

more dancing novas

_and__ more dark_

"Let's try this again: What is SeeD? What is its true purpose?"

_why__ is the what what why_

_why__ you why him_

"What the fuck did you just say?"

CRACK

_dark__ again --_

_and__ again_

_  
_

_again__ and again_

_

* * *

_

How long did this go on? How long could it? How long before his body and mind would deliver him to the welcoming darkness for good? Sleep... He longed for it. Sleep, long, forgiving sleep. A midnight of awareness, relentlessly eternal. _Please, give me sleep._

A confusion of opaque dark and hot white light and the incessant thundering rain of blows marked his time. When he could see, he couldn't see anything -- when he saw light, he saw nothing by the light and nothing but it. And the fists, which blackened his vision anew, until all he saw was puffy, red-rimmed dark again.

Voices he knew. A voice. A voice repeated in ears, mind, heart -- questions he couldn't answer, couldn't hear. Couldn't see.

_and__ darkness_

Days went by, he was sure of that. And as he slipped less and less frequently into the constant darkness, he began to understand more of his situation. He was being tortured, that much was certain. He'd been transported from somewhere to here and was being beaten for information. This he knew.

He also knew by whom. Not all the time. There were stretches of time when the voice he knew wasn't shouting expletives and questions... time when the voice was gone, though the blows came just as hard by quiet and anonymous hands.

CRACK

_and__ the voice_

"Just answer the god damned questions, pal. What is SeeD's true purpose?"

"Don't make me keep this up. Look at you... your poor raw, swollen hamburger of a face. Why are you making me do this to you? You know what I want to know; tell me _what I want to know!!!_"

CRACK

"You're making me take extreme measures, old buddy. You're to blame for this."

CRACK

He couldn't look up. Couldn't see through the haze of pain, couldn't hear through the blood that screamed in his ears, couldn't lift his shattered head. All he knew was that the darkness returned and The Voice didn't.

And that was fine.

The darkness fed him, kept his knotted stomach from withering to a hardened nut. Small, furry hands out of the darkness shoveled scraps of rotten meat into his mouth, sometimes he chewed, sometimes he swallowed -- most times he vomited it all back up before it had time to settle in his burning guts and nourish him.

Yet he lived. He even managed to keep a meal down long enough to defecate a dribble of it down his leg. And that was fine.

A taste. A taste he knew. Curative potions... elixers he'd gagged down in the hospital wing on occasion. Sense memories of sickbay beds, warm poultices, and calloused, uninterested hands traveling over his body... he knew these familiarities as he knew The Voice that had hurled invectives at him, knew the fist that curled into the splintered bones around his eyes.

He was being healed. Being... strengthened. He was taken down and changed out of his shit-smeared and mildewed clothes. Tended to. Hands from out of the darkness -- small hands with needle-claws and velvet-padded fingers -- tended to his battered body, covered it with salves, bandages. The hands chirped and chittered to each other in the impenetrable dark and managed his recuperation.

He tried out his voice and it came to his ears as an incomprehensible whine, the rusty squeal of an unused machine. Later. He'd try again. He had the time.

* * *

Days. Weeks? Months? Years? 

He ate, fetid meat and pungent water, left in the dark by his unseen and chattering nurses. He ate. He ate and kept it down.

And that was fine.

He spoke occasionally to the hands. They chirped back. He recognized his own voice again, not strong -- no -- but audible and human.

And that was fine too.

He slept and dreamt of ice and cried in his sleep, but didn't know that he did and didn't know why.

In his sleep, he'd been moved again. Upright, strapped up again. So it began again. The Voice again. And the horrible white light that burned his unused eyes.

"I've brought someone to meet you, pal. He's gonna help me open you up and spill out all your dirty secrets."

A new voice. A sluggish voice. Thick. A gravy voice, a tar voice.

"Good morning."

"I'll let you two get acquainted."

A door hissed open and slammed shut. A long silence. The burning light.

The Tar Voice: "I don't like the smell of wax. I don't like the heat. I sleep on my side. Now that we are acquainted, I'm going to fill every crack in this room with your screams."

Sounds. Sounds with purpose. Sounds pregnant with menace and the Tar Voice's promise:

THUNK

click

snap

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

A machine screamed

-- the world exploded and he screamed too.

* * *

Author's Notes! 

Well, I have to give a HUGE thanks to my hubbie, who we shall refer to as Scott, who actually wrote this chapter! NOT ME! I MUST INSIST THIS WAS NOT WRITTEN BY ME! However, I did have a good bit of input on this, though it was all from Scott's brain. Hey, I'm not this cool. My idea of torture stuff is whip walls and that just ain't cool. Scott, he gets the mad props. Sorry 'bout the lateness. We were toiling with how to post this, being a bit unconvential in terms of layout. Unfortunately, we couldn't do it the way we wanted. Lovlerly all the same though. Okay, not lovely. Icky and horrible but wonderful in its own strange way.

Oh, and as for next chapter...prepare for some intense fun.

Until then!

Ciao!

Noa


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